Hidden Gem (27 page)

The Pop Source

May 3

Despite scarce public appearances and interviews, pop sensation Queen Bee’s fame has skyrocketed, according to polls.
 
The teenaged songstress has gained not only recognition in the U.S, but fans as well.
 
Her single “Tell the World” (for which she has shockingly not yet released a video) sat at number one on iTunes for several months before dropping to its current spot at number four.
 
According to polls, 88% of pop fans are looking forward to purchasing her next single.

According to various hints and clues released by Bee’s team, her next U.S performance is widely believed to be at the “Today Show” summer concert series.
 
In the meantime, fan sites continue to speculate over Bee’s true identity as well as the state of her relationship with R&B crooner Tyler Chase.
 
Chase has made it clear that while he and Bee have met, he has not seen her in person since the Staples Center security meltdown that left the two pop stars unguarded amongst thousands of wild fans.
 
Gossip hounds across the
internet
have also weighed in on the mystery of the situation.
 
A commenter on
blog
“Her Royal Secrecy” writes: “Her real life must be 1000x better than Queen Bee’s if she is prioritizing it over fame and Tyler Chase.”

On the Monday back to school, eyes followed Gemma at every corner she turned.
 
Behind her, she heard whispered recounts of the weekend.
 
At Gemma’s insistence, Leah and Kate told her what rumors were going around.
 
Gemma felt she deserved the pain of knowing what terrible things were being said about her.
 
It was proof.
 
Proof that having a “normal” life was not everything it was chalked up to be.
 
She didn’t have the energy for it.
 
She only had enough for one life, and she decided that she preferred Queen Bee’s.
 
Somehow, it was less exhausting.

After school, she insisted Gavin and Damian let her walk home on her own.
 
She felt guilty looking at either of them.
 
She had complicated Gavin’s easygoing life by choosing an irresistible group of friends that she should have guessed would cause trouble.
 
She could barely look Damian in the eye after the humiliation she had put him through.
 
They were both so good to her even after the continuous episodes of drama.
 
She had complicated their lives tremendously, and simply because Madison felt jealousy for something that didn’t exist.
 
Gemma loved Damian.
 
She almost hated Lucas now,
for ever
being a part of her life.

Gemma walked home through the winding back roads of the town, away from sight.
 
She avoided the town center, the coffee shops, anywhere she would be seen returning home in her self-pitying mood.
 
She was angry – mad at Lucas for ruining what could have been a perfect high school experience.
 
Mad at Madison for taking her in and then turning her back.
 
Mad at Jillian for not seeing through Madison’s ways.
 
She was disappointed at Leah and Kate for being too scared to speak against the unfairness that she knew they saw.

It was her parents’ fault.
 
Gemma would have felt fine touring or even just being in New York, hanging out with Armand and Penelope and being home-schooled on the road.
 
She didn’t need friends her own age, a normal education, the high school experience – these were all things her father wanted for her just because he wanted her to be more like him.
 
And now he wasn’t even in the country.
 
He hardly ever called, always assuming that Mira had everything taken care of.
 
He wasn’t there to support her.

By the time Gemma had found her way home, the sun was beginning to set.
 
She had walked for hours, taking loops that prolonged her time alone.
 
Gavin’s car was not yet in the driveway but Mira’s was.
 
She was home early.

Gemma struggled with the stupid lock on the door.
 
She furiously turned the key to no avail.
 
It was the temperamental lock that got her into this whole mess – gave her time alone with Lucas and made her really fall for him.
 
The door swung open and Mira stood inside, taking her Mikimoto pearl earrings off with one hand.

“Do you tear at the door like this everyday?” she
tsked
.
 
Gemma stormed past her.
 
Mira quickly grabbed the back of Gemma’s top.
 
“
Excuse
you, young lady – what is going on?” Gemma turned towards her aunt and pulled herself free.

“
I hate it here!
” she screamed in a voice that shocked them both.
 
She choked on her words, crying and covering her face in shame.
 
Mira reached to embrace her but Gemma thrashed away, running towards her room.
 
Mira followed.
 
Gemma tried to close the heavy door in time but Mira intercepted.

“What is going
on
, honey?” she asked.
 
Gemma could hear Mira’s steady voice trying to keep cool, though her eyes were beginning to show panic.

“I don’t want to be here,” Gemma cried.
 
She felt a pain in her tightening throat.
 
“I never wanted to be here.
 
It was all of you, not me.
 
It was Dad and now he’s not even here.
 
I can’t
do
this!”

“Don’t scream! You have to preserve your voice.”

“Are you freaking serious?” Gemma almost laughed.
 
She could see the hurt on Mira’s face but she couldn’t stop.
 
“
This
is my life now, isn’t it?
This house, this small town, this school, these
horrible
people.
 
This is it.”
 
She paused for just a moment, almost wishing for Mira to say that it wasn’t, that she could be just Queen Bee from now on and forget about Gemma.
 
She didn’t.
 
Gemma felt her tears stream down her heated cheeks.
 
She kicked the pink ivory chair beside her vanity that Mira so loved.
 
“I’m sick of having to worry about both lives.
 
It makes me literally sick.”

“Gemma, honey, please,” Mira said softly, reaching for her.

“I can’t be Gemma.
 
I can’t be this stupid, small town high schooler anymore.
 
This isn’t who I am – I feel
horrible
as her.
 
I’m Queen Bee.
 
I only know how to be her.
 
I can’t be confident, I can’t be a
real person
without her.”

“Gemma, this is exactly what your parents and I were afraid of,” Mira said sternly.
 
“We don’t want you to lose yourself.
 
We always knew you were a sweet, shy girl and we loved that you could be larger than life as Queen Bee – but you can’t lose Gemma.”
 
Mira carefully placed her hand on Gemma’s shoulder, squeezing it comfortingly.
 
“Queen Bee won’t last forever.
 
What will you do when she’s gone? Who will you
be
friends with? What will your life be?”

Gemma turned away from Mira, gasping for air through her sobs.
 
Through her tears she gazed at the train of the Balenciaga gown, peeking out from her closet.
 
She floated towards it, touching the delicate material.

“Gemma,” Mira ran her hands through her hair in attempts to soothe her.
 
“You’ll be so thankful you did this, trust me.”
 

Gemma shook her head.
 
“Why can’t I just tell people who I am, then?” she whispered bitterly.
 
Mira sighed and put her hands to her head.

“The moment you tell people who you are, you compromise Queen Bee’s persona.”
 
Mira looked Gemma in the eye, gravely serious.
 
“But that will be nothing compared to what you’ll have done to your life as Gemma Hunter.
 
Do you remember the paparazzi, Gemma? Do you remember how you never had a moment to breathe with them around? Imagine them when you’re trying to get through finals or SATs, or just trying to shop with your friends…”

“What
friends
?” Gemma practically spat.
 
“Do you even know what I’m dealing with at school? Do you know what everyone’s
say
ing? I have nothing because I can’t defend myself, because I don’t even know who I
am
.
 
Gemma Hunter is nothing.”

With that, Gemma stormed out of her room.
 
She continued down the stairs and out of the front door.
 
She ran into the darkness of the early evening and through the front and back yards of her neighbors.
 
She heard the faint cries of her name behind her as she ran farther and farther from Mira.
 
Not a single person in the world could know what she was going through and she hated that they were even trying.

~

Not so surprisingly, the outdoor basketball court where she watched Damian practice was rather lonely without him.
 
Gemma had no idea what time it was.
 
She had left her cell phone at home and had wandered aimlessly about town until she reached the court.
 
It was surrounded by forest and had a soft patch of grass between the trees and cement.
 
The grass reminded her of the picnics she would have with Damian after his hours of shooting.
 
They would lay out on the soft grass, never bothering to use the blanket that Gemma always kept tucked into her Nanette
Lepore
straw tote.

Gemma spread herself across the grass, smelling its fresh summery scent.
 
She didn’t care about the buzz of what were probably mosquitoes.
 
Their presence just meant that the school year was almost over.
 
In the still darkness, the sounds of crickets and rustling leaves in the breeze felt that much louder.
 
She closed her eyes and listened, letting the sounds engulf her.
 
For the first time in awhile, she flashed back to her concerts.
 
To the hum of excitement in the audience.
 
She wondered how it was possible that that part of her could feel so unreal and distant every time she left it.

Through her closed eyes, she could see a bright light.
 
Gemma sat up to see a car pull in over the grass.
 
She squinted to see if it was Gavin or Mira’s car.
 
It was neither.

“Gemma?” she heard a boy’s voice call.
 
She scrambled to her feet, trying to recognize the outline of the figure that was approaching.
 
Her eyes had yet to adjust to the bright headlights.

“Damian?”

“No,” the figure let out an awkward laugh.
 
“Sorry to disappoint.”
 
Gemma could see now that it was Lucas.
 
He was dressed in what she figured were his pajamas – a plain white t-shirt over flannel pants.

“How’d you know I was here?” she asked.

“Mira.
 
She knocked on my door and asked if I could help Gavin look for you.”

“Is Gavin with you?”
 

“No.
 
We drove separately to cover more ground.
 
Mira’s still home just in case you go back on your own.”

“Oh God,” Gemma blushed.
 
“I’m so sorry they asked you to do that.”

Lucas waved it off.
 
“Are you okay? We got really worried when Damian and the girls didn’t even know where you were.”

“You guys called them?” she sounded more alarmed than she had meant to.