Hidden Heart (32 page)

Tessa had known Dina for so
long, yet never knew about any women’s shelter run by
her.

“
I’d be so happy to help. I
could take the boxes there, if you give me the address. I also have
my old furniture, from my old apartment; if it’s of any use, you
can have it,” Tessa said, excited she could help.

“
How many boxes do you
have?” asked Dina.

“
A lot, I’m not sure I’ll
fit everything into my car, but maybe I’ll make two trips if I need
to.”

“
I have a minivan; how
about I come and pick them up?”

“
That would be great.
Dina?” Tessa said and waited for a few second before she said out
loud, “I’d like to get more involved in this matter…maybe donate
some time…Would that be something I could do?”

“
Oh dear, I’m so glad you
asked,” Dina said, her voice sounding choked up. “I always need
people willing to volunteer to help me out. Unfortunately, there
are not many women that want to work and not be paid. I have
difficulties every month paying the rent for the house, and I get
the food pretty much donated from stores and restaurants. But I can
barely make it from month to month and I’d hate to have to close
the shelter. Some of their stories are just heartbreaking, and I
try my best to help.

“
Women do all the work in
and around the house. The only man who knows about this place is
Victor, who swore on his life he’d never divulge its location. I
can spend days telling you how I run the place, what we do, but I
don’t want to take advantage of your generosity and willingness to
help.”

“
Dina, I really want to
help. It sparked something in my brain. This would be something I’d
like to do; help others get back on their feet. I feel I can do
much more than just donate my clothes. How about you come tomorrow
and pick up the boxes, and while we are at it, we can talk and
maybe some good ideas will come out of this.”

After she hung up, Tessa’s
mind ran a hundred miles an hour. She always wanted to work with
people and help. Find something to do for others. And she knew
she’d be good at it. She just felt it was the right thing to do,
somehow redeeming herself for her mistakes.

Dina showed up promptly at
eight the next morning, hugged Tessa and the two of them began
loading the boxes in the minivan while they covered the subject of
the “Mothers In Need” shelter run by Dina.

“
Right now I have ten women
and their kids in the house. The need is much higher, unfortunately
the house can’t accommodate more than ten families at a time. I had
the living room transformed into a kitchen with a big eating area,
and we still can’t have everyone sitting at the table at the same
time. The yard has been divided into two areas, with one side
supporting a vegetable garden, the other side a playground.” As she
spoke Dina picked up one box at a time and loaded her minivan,
while Tessa listened and carried boxes to her car and loaded as
many as she could fit in. For her age, Dina moved fast and with
surprising agility.

“
I have to make sure those
kids get into school, and let me tell you, what a struggle. You
know our stupid bureaucratic system, I’m so sick of it. I had to
make lots of connections, schools, electric company, water, gas,
everywhere. They all want to be bribed otherwise nothing gets done.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve told Victor I need money to
buy food and supplies for those women and he rolls his eyes. But I
can’t leave those poor creatures with no help. A friend of mine
sends me checks once in awhile to cover some of the costs, but it’s
never enough.”

With both cars completely
loaded, Dina gave Tessa the address and directions to the shelter.
They’d have to return for the furniture, but Dina promised she’d
have Victor come help, maybe even rent a truck.

The house was on the East
side of Bucharest, solitary and most importantly, no one would ever
guess that this was actually a place for fugitive mothers and their
kids.

Dina gave Tessa a tour of
the place. Thick, tall walls surrounded the house, a double wooden
gate kept intruders away. The rooms were very small, but clean and
neatly kept; bathrooms were crowded, especially in the mornings
when everyone got ready for school or work. The young mothers with
babies stayed at home, ensuring everyone had cooked meals each day.
Once everyone left the house in the morning, they took turns doing
the cooking, laundry and caring for the little ones that didn’t go
to daycare or kindergarten.

Some women worked two jobs,
while others in the house took care of their children. They’d bring
home the money and share it. Groceries and house supplies were
shared between everyone living there. At times it was chaotic, but
the one thing they all loved about the place was that they
were
safe
from any
kind of abuse.

It was sad to see so many
of them. In Romanian society, too many women ended up abused
physically and emotionally by their husbands. Considered shameful,
many of them never talked about this, keeping the suffering as a
secret their entire lives, living a miserable and horrible lie.
Others were stronger and divorced, taking their children and moving
away.

The worst were the ones who
had never worked, but stayed at home taking care of the children
while the husbands went to work. Some of the women preferred to
return to their husbands and the abuse started all over again. Some
never survived because they were abused too much and chose to
commit suicide. Others ended up killed by their husbands, beaten
until they stopped breathing.

The income for most of the
families was very low, barely making ends meet from month to month.
With no money and no place to go, the women were abused and kept
under very strict control. The kids had pretty much the same
destiny as their moms, violence on almost daily basis, with no
escape.

“
When I opened the place,
nobody came for a long time. Women were too afraid to come out and
talk. I made some connections at the Tutelary Authority and left my
phone number with the clerk. One day I got a call to stop by the
office. There was a barefoot woman who had been beaten up, along
with two small children. She had bloodstains on her shirt, her kids
cried from hunger and she was terrified her husband might come
after her and kill her.

“
I took her and the kids,
drove to the shelter and tried to calm her the best I could. A
doctor friend of mine came to check the woman; luckily, she didn’t
have any internal injuries. The woman remained in the house and
after she healed, I got her some decent clothes and helped her get
a job in a store as a cashier. She kept her job, divorced the jerk
and won custody of both her kids. She moved out six months later
into a small apartment she paid rent for. She still comes to see us
regularly and we’ve become so close.”

With Tessa by her side,
Dina helped one of the children hop on the swing and pushed it
gently. “The worst of all is the neglect showed by the Government.
Nobody wants to have anything to do with these families. The
Government is too corrupt to care for those less fortunate; they
changed the laws so that they could steal more, preoccupied with
how to facilitate their own enrichment rather than to fulfill what
they promised during election times. You know all of this, I don’t
have to tell you how we live.”

Tessa met the women at home
and played with some of the babies and the kids. When she first
held a baby, her heart dropped in her stomach. Her own baby
would’ve been a few months old by now, if given the chance to live.
She cried and smiled at the same time, seeing the little baby
asleep in her arms, fists curled on his chest, free of any worries
and sweet like an angel. She then helped prepare dinner and chatted
more with Dina.

“
I’m telling you, I
struggle the most with how to raise funds in a society that doesn’t
acknowledge such a thing exists. It’s easier to get clothing and
supplies donated rather than money, but we need money for all the
extra costs. I have monthly bills coming in and some of them aren’t
paid on time because of the lack of funds.” Dina finished her
dinner, then stood and went to rinse her plate.

Tessa followed her. “Maybe
we can start a campaign for fundraising and bring the battered
women subject to the media’s attention. I know from experience what
these women go through,” Tessa said, shaking her head. She leaned
against the sink while Dina stopped working and stared at
her.

“
Oh, dear…I took a whole
day out of your life, talked up a storm about my problems, but I
didn’t once ask how are
you,
Tessa?” Dina’s face looked concerned and
tired.

“
I’m fine, better now…a lot
of time has passed since…well, since you know what happened.” Tessa
sighed and felt despair lurking in her heart again, not for
herself, but for those women in need. At least she had a home, she
had money, she had some control over her life. But them?

“
I’m almost done with the
house renovation; you should come and visit. And I thought about
starting a business, or something to preoccupy myself.”

“
Have you considered going
back to work with Victor? I still want him to retire, you
know?”

Tessa remembered the night
she felt on top of the world when Victor announced he’d be giving
her the reigns of his company. The same night her mama had passed
away and her life had begun to crumble. It seemed so far away, and
the feelings less painful. As if time didn’t only pass by, but had
also lessened the intensity of the heartache, making her wounds
less important compared to what happened around her. The world
outside hers still existed, with good and evil, with joy and
sorrow, but she’d been too busy tending to her own ravaged soul to
see it.

She turned to face Dina.
“He offered me the job back, but I… there is nothing I want back.
My life… The more I think about what you told me today and what
I’ve seen, I feel like I want to be part of this. Maybe together
we’ll begin something that would help more women; think how many
are out there suffering. I feel a bond with them I never had with
anything else before—it gives me goose bumps!” Tessa rubbed her
arms as a chill went through her body.

“
Oh, dear, you are the same
Tessa I’ve known for so long! So excited, so ready to throw
yourself into work again,” Dina said, and gave her a motherly
hug.

Those hugs. Tessa realized
how much she missed them, and that her skin didn’t crawl at a human
touch. She let the feeling sink in, and let Dina hug her
longer.

When she pulled away, Dina
dried off her face, but smiled. “You are like a daughter to me, you
always have been. You’re strong and capable. I’m so glad you’re
back.” She caressed Tessa’s cheek, then walked back to help clean
the table.

Once done, they went out in
the garden and sat on a bench. The evening seemed warmer, a sure
sign of spring taking over.

“
Dina, I know you were both
a friend and colleague of Mama’s. There is something I want to ask
you, but it’s somewhat embarrassing.”

“
What is it?”

“
I have a letter that she
left for me saying… saying, that… my dad wasn’t really my dad, that
another man was. I have no name, no address, nothing; all I know is
that they had an affair.”

“
Oh, dear, I’m too old for
this,” Dina said, and shook her head.

“
You know something?”
apprehension rose in Tessa’s voice, her heart pounding
fast.

Dina didn’t answer, just
continued shaking her head and wringing her hands. She jerked when
Tessa knelt in front of her, gripping her hands.

“
Dina, please, if you know
something, I need to know—I have to. Please? You have been Mama’s
friend, and mine for so long. I have nowhere to turn; my life has
been destroyed. I have to find out where I come from, who I really
am if I want to move forward.
Please
?”

Dina sighed a few times and
bit her lips. She closed and opened her eyes repeatedly and each
time, Tessa still looked intently at her.

“
Okay. I guess since Ana
left a letter for you, you know the story, or at least some of it.
I no longer have to keep the secret, though your mama made me swear
I’d never tell you, or anybody.” She sighed again, blew her nose
and continued, “He was a doctor in the same hospital. His name was
Adrian Mincu, but I didn’t know him that well. You look alike, your
eyes especially remind me of him.”

Tessa took in every word.
Her biological father had a name, she now knew it and all she had
to do was to track him down.

“
Did anyone else
know?”

“
In the hospital you mean?”
when Tessa didn’t answer, but just nodded, Dina said, “No, I don’t
think so, I’ve never heard others talk about it, and believe me,
such a subject would’ve been heavily discussed in our locker
room.”

“
How did you find
out?”

“
When Ana got pregnant, she
came to me and asked if the doctor I worked with would, you
know…would help her get an abortion. They were illegal and not many
doctors performed them for fear of the Communists. At that point we
worked together and had been friends for about seven years, but I
don’t think she would’ve told me if she didn’t have to. I worked in
the gynecology unit and I had better connections than her. And even
then, she didn’t have to tell me about her affair, but I think she
got really scared about the consequences.”