His Assurance (Assured Distraction Book 3) (15 page)

“Honest, huh?” She’s looking right at me. “So in all the times y’all Skyped, you never told him the truth? That’s a shitty thing to do, Lola.” The stare she fixed on me told me she was surprised I would leave that information out. “Didn’t he say something about it when he talked to you once you got to the States? Why didn’t he question you then?”

“He tried to a couple of times, but something kept getting in the way of us talking. He must not have wanted to know that badly, or he would have pursued it more.

“Or, he was trying to give you the chance to do the right thing.” Journey kept her stare on me.

I finally broke eye contact and looked down. “No, I didn’t. I really fucked things up, huh?”

“Hell yeah, I would say you did. How are you going to fix this? Did he tell you to get the fuck out of his house?”

“I asked if he wanted me to go. I didn’t want to stay where I wasn’t wanted, but he wouldn’t answer me.”

“Good call on your part.” She drained her mimosa since her coffee mug was empty, picked up her fruit bags, and left me. I guess she was mad too, and I messed up their plans, as well.

We spent the early afternoon lounging around, before leaving for the festival. I thought I put off going longer than we should, but I didn’t know how I would feel running into him or worse, seeing the groupies who always seemed to show up at the worst possible times. Right now would be one of those times.

We didn’t have to go into the VIP area today, but he wouldn’t be there anyway. I decided it would be better to let him reach out to me if he ever wanted to speak to me again. Leave it to me to mess things up so badly, so fast. I could see our relationship going somewhere, or at least until this morning.

Once we headed downtown, I realized without the VIP parking, we had to walk at least a mile or Uber over to it. I memorized his schedule since I didn’t want randomly to run into him. I planned to enjoy my day listening to the great music.

In my mind, I thought I could pull it off. It turned out, with every new stage we ventured to, I found myself searching for him. I hoped I would see him talking to friends off stage as he did yesterday.

I knew I royally fucked this up and had no clue how to repair the problems between us. He may never speak to me again based on the feelings he poured out last night and this morning. Since I knew how he felt about having strangers at his home, I didn’t feel comfortable going back over there, even if it was just to talk to him. He made everything in his life known right up front, and I broke the whole trust issue so soon into the ‘getting to know you’ stage, that I was at a loss as to how I could fix it.

“Glass Animals are playing on this stage next,” Addie told me. “I love these guys. Do you think it would be all right to use our VIP passes to go up front? I would give anything to get to see them up close and maybe take some pictures of them.”

Addie was quiet, and I hated to deny her the chance. Ivy had ditched the girls for the guy she met, so it was only three of them. “Go ahead. I think I’m going to get another Apple Ale, and I’ll meet y’all back at the corner of the Beer Hall. Have fun.”

“I don’t want you to go alone, Lola,” Addie said. They had all been attentive to me, so I guessed Journey filled them in.

“I’ll be fine. I can listen to the music playing over at the stage by the beer hall until Glass Animals finish.”

“If you’re sure, then.” Her glowing excitement made bringing them to the festival better for me.

“I’m a big girl. I can fend for myself for an hour or two.” I waved them off and turned to find a cold adult apple juice.

Sitting on the steps listening to some hardcore metal music wasn’t exactly the best way to enjoy my drink, but it was good to relax. The location was a great people-watching place, too. I was surprised at the amount of people who brought their children to the festival. It was kid-friendly enough, but the crowds of people would make me paranoid about losing my child.

My kid, now that was a random thought. I suppose one day I would actually get down to having one or two, but it wasn’t even on my radar so far. Hell, I couldn’t find and keep a boyfriend, much less a husband. Those thoughts led me to Gunner, so I pulled out my silent phone.

The blank screen only displayed the time: no calls, no texts, no messages. Guess I could chalk another one up to my stupidity. Why did I keep that from him in Paris?

I knew AD was rehearsing when I saw the time so that he wouldn’t be texting me anyway. I turned off the phone and put it away, leaned back against a post, and tried to appreciate the fact that the band playing their hearts out was trying to impress the thousands milling around.

I never expected Lola to be gone from the house when I returned from running. She didn’t have a car, but her bag was gone, and so were the clothes from the dryer. It looked like she didn’t plan to return. When she asked me if I wanted her to leave, I should have flat-out said no instead of leaving it up to her. I honestly didn’t know how I felt about the deception. I hated liars, cheaters, and fakes, but no one could have convinced me yesterday that she fell into one of those categories.

I rolled into the practice room with my sticks in my back pockets ready to do this. I could easily take out some of my frustration right now on my drums. KeeMac tuned his guitar and did some strange sounds with his throat that he always did before he sang, and Chandler looked at a music score. The others hadn’t arrived.

“Hey, Chan, got some new tunes for us?” I leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.

“Well, hello. I thought you might be late since I hear you’re entertaining a new lady this week.” She ended it with a smile that lit the room. KeeMac was one lucky dude the day he won her over.

“No. Uh, she’s staying at a house on the lake with her sister and friends. It’s a twenty-first birthday party for the sister, so Lola’s entertaining them for the week.” I had no intention of sharing that we were probably already done because knowing Chan she would want a play-by-play scenario. I did not want to go there with the band.

“What a perfect way to spend a monumental birthday. I’m sure we’ll meet her later, if not at the show, then at the after party.”

“Shit. I forgot all about that damn thing. I don’t want to go rub shoulders with a bunch of pricks from the label all fucking night.”

“Other people will be there. You know it’ll be the who’s who of bands, too. Peri said the guest list was extensive. Did you already have plans with your girl?”

“Yeah, something like that.” They could believe what they wanted at this point. I didn’t know how I felt about her right now. Am I mad, disappointed, sad, or possibly all of those things? Did I even care at all? Up until a few weeks ago, seeing her was a fantasy. Now, who knew?

The others came in, and naturally, Carter was last. On a normal day, it would be the two of us coming in together from a night of fun, but I traded that in for a woman who had me all tangled up. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be. I was happy before her, wasn’t I?

“Dude, when we meeting the new hot piece?” Carter slapped me on the back.

“Don’t call her that. It’s not that way.” I said it louder than I intended because everyone stopped to look at me.

“Touchy fucking subject. I like it. Seems our drummer’s found himself a keeper.” Carter picked up his bass and looked around as everyone else had their eyes on me. They were obviously waiting for me to confirm or deny it.

“Yeah, we’ll see.” It was a noncommittal answer.

“She’s coming out to see the concert, right? I heard you had her and a bevy of young beauties backstage yesterday. When are you going to parade them around for me to meet? I don’t remember getting an invitation to come over.” I hated that Carter had found out about them being there. I would never hear the end of it.

Hayden and Ryan walked into the rehearsal room, and everyone greeted them. Hayden looked at me with a sheepish grin and picked up his acoustic while Ryan took his Strat out and started tuning. After the tuning, he moved to stand in front of my kit.

“Hayden said he had a damn good time when they all went out on Sixth.”

“Yeah, I do believe he did. That girl’s a wild one. She came home from the fucking festival with a different one, so it was one and done for her.”

“Is that right? He seemed fucking stoked about seeing her again before they leave town.”

“Probably not going to happen now.” I didn’t say this loud and Ryan looked at me, wondering if I was referring to Ivy or another situation. I could tell from his raised eyebrow he was waiting for an answer, but I shrugged my shoulders.

KeeMac took over once the whole group was there, and we started in on the set list. Even though I had my mind on my home situation, we had a kickass rehearsal.

“The new music has a sweet sound to it,” Hayden told everyone. He sat in with us sometimes, if nothing else but to learn our new music. It honed his skills and allowed him to learn from Ryan, who was the best guitar player I knew. When you put KeeMac and Ryan together, they were unstoppable, and Hayden benefited from them.

“Okay, let’s meet backstage around seven since we don’t go on until nine.” We all nodded in agreement to KeeMac’s directive.

“You want to grab a beer?” Carter asked before I stood.

“Sure, why not.”

We walked into the bar down from the studio and took a seat, ordering two longnecks like we always did. I knew he was going to ask me what was going on.

“You want to tell me what’s going on with you and the French hottie?”

“Not really, but I know you’re like a fucking little girl when it comes to gossip, so I might as well tell you and get it over with. I am not sure she’s the one for me.”

“Dude, what’s not to like about her? She’s gorgeous, and you told me you’d met your match in bed with her. What more could you ask for?” He took a long pull from the bottle.

I drank deep from my bottle and then looked directly at him. “That’s all you think about, looks and sex. There’s more to life you know. Personality, trust, loyalty, morals, values. Those are all important to me, too.”

“Whoa, my fellow fuck and run buddy. No one’s talking about you marrying the girl. She’s here now. Who knows when she’ll be back?” He held the amber bottle between his thumb and index finger, close to his lips while he spoke.

“You see, that’s where you’re wrong, and that’s where I got my sorry ass handed to me by making fucking assumptions about her. My mind’s fucked up right now. She’s not exactly from France. She went to school at UT and lived back and forth all of her life between Houston and Paris. The little sister is going to school in Paris now with all of the girls she brought here for her birthday.”

“No shit?”

“Yeah, no shit. So guess how much I felt like a dumb ass when she finally owned up to it all. And she didn’t even offer the information until I forced her.”

“Secrets, huh?” He finally turned and looked me in the eyes. “You sound like it’s a deal breaker for you.”

“Yeah, you know how I feel about liars. People need to own their shit. I wouldn’t lie to her, and I made damn sure she knew it from the beginning.”

“Wait a minute. Surely you’re not fucking telling me that you never once told some of that sweet little pussy we’ve picked up along the way, a different story to keep them off your scent later.” Carter looked at me like I was lying to him now.

“Why would I lie about it? Got no reason to. Hell, half the time I got laid on the road was because I was in a band.” I smiled to myself thinking about it. “Are you telling me you’ve lied to chicks to get them in bed with you?”

“Hell yeah. Don’t get me wrong; the whole rockstar thing is a fucking awesome draw for these groupies, but sometimes, I just want a regular damn woman. Someone who likes me for me. We get all the bat-shit crazy on the road we can handle, so when we are home, I try to be incognito as much as I can. Believe it or not, there are females out there who don’t know who we are. Granted, they are few and far between, but I like that shit when I find it.” He looked at me with a stupid grin.

“So you fucking lie to these chicks on a regular basis?”

“Every chance I get.” He smirked and downed the beer, then signaled for another.

I couldn't help but stare. I’m still not sold on accepting her lies and deceitfulness, especially when she had the chance to tell me.

I rolled into the VIP parking area about an hour ahead of time. I had nowhere to be, so I decided I might as well hang out and meet up with some of my friends from other bands. Hell, I could even sit in with some.

I hadn’t spoken to Lola, so I had no fucking idea if she was here, but I felt sure she was with the girls. They came to Austin, so I knew they were having fun somewhere out in the hordes of people milling around from stage to stage.

One of my favorite bands, Priority, was backstage waiting to go on when I walked in the lounge area. They were an alternative band with a drummer who killed it behind his kit. After we had talked a few minutes, it was time for their set, so I decided to hang around in the VIP section to listen. They played one of the smaller stages since they aren’t as big an act as AD, but they were a damn good band all the same.

When I wandered into that section, the first people I ran into were Journey and three others. Fucking awesome. Just who I was dying to see. It only took a second to figure out that Lola was not there. Maybe she had already found some other damn fool to latch onto.

“Hi, Gunner,” Journey said when our eyes meet.

“Hey.” I was not giving her a damn thing.

“Why are you out here? Wouldn’t let the big rock star behind the scenes for all of the acts?” It was obvious her little kitty claws were out and ready to do some damage. The uncomfortable look the other three wore told me this was not going to go well. I needed to get the hell out of there, but I couldn’t help myself.

“Your sister find her another sucker to get her claws into?” That was the wrong thing to say to her because the others stepped between the two of us to keep her from launching into me.

Addie spoke up which surprised me. “She’s here somewhere wandering around alone since the prick she was supposed to be with dumped her.”

“Well, maybe that smart son-of-a-bitch figured out she’s not as innocent as she seems.”

I guessed she took offense to my comment because she stepped up toe-to-toe with me before I could make a move. “I haven’t known her all that long, but innocent doesn’t seem like the image she wants to achieve. She seems like a fun girl who knows what she wants and goes after it.”

“Yeah, she can go after someone else then, because it won’t be me. I’ll see y’all later.” I turned to walk away and then remembered the party. “Oh and y’all can still make the party tonight because you’re on the guest list, and I’m sure there’ll be a bunch of dumb fucks waiting to hook-up with a girl who knows what she wants.” I threw Addie’s words back in her face. I knew it was wrong, but she pissed me off, and I didn’t think before I said it. That would probably bite me in the ass later on.

Journey stomped around until she stood in front of me and spoke up. “You don’t even know my sister or me or my friends for that matter. I’ll bet you were so anxious to get in her pants that you never spent enough time hanging out just getting to know her. Paris was probably the same damn thing, too.” She even got up in my face, and her stance told me she was ready to throw a punch if needed. Thankfully her friends were strategically located beside her to prevent that scene from happening.