His Punishment (16 page)

I sank back to the chair and
gripped on it too tight I could have broken its legs. I was staring at Rhea. I
don’t want this girl. I looked at her stomach that still didn’t show any signs
of baby bump.

I sighed deeply trying to suppress
the heavy pumping of my blood from my heart. I stood up without saying a word
to either one of them. There was no excuse for my behavior, but I am not in my
right state of mind after that horrifying news.

I don’t know how I got out of the
building. I was still clutching on the paper that said it. I was still staring
blankly on my steering wheel. I was trying to calm my breathing down but it
just won’t. I don’t smoke but at the moment, I think I could smoke a pack in
five minutes.

I remembered Tara when she once
smoked because of me. Then I remembered I was supposed to pick her up. I drove
to the landing strip. I knew she was already waiting for me.

I kept glancing at the results
while I was driving, hoping it would suddenly turn into NEGATIVE but it
doesn’t. I tried slapping my face a couple times but it just hurt me convincing
me I’m not having some stupid nightmare.

When I arrived at the landing
strip, I waited in the car still my breathing heavy.

In a few minutes, I saw Tara got
out of the building in front of the landing strip, waving at me happily. I felt
sad instantly. I don’t know how to tell her the devastating news.

I was not able to go down the car
and get her. I was so fixed in my car seat hanging on tightly to the wheel. My
knees felt wobbly all of sudden. My faith and strength lost all together when I
saw the woman whom I wanted to share my future with.

Good thing she was only helping
herself with her tiny back pack. I suspected she sent her luggage with the
driver who picked up their private pilot.

“Hubby!” she kissed me as soon as
she got in the car by herself. She closed her door and turned back to me again.

I just looked at her blankly.

“I missed you!” she enveloped me in
her arms then moved in her seat, she kissed me passionately as I held her with
my right arm.

She twisted in her seat to give me
a tighter embrace.

“Oh sorry,” she saw she crumpled
the blasted paper that will destroy both of us.

She took it and read silently then
stared straight at the road ahead us and unconsciously dropping the result in
the floor near her feet.

I cried. For the first time in my
adult life, I cried.

I arrived home and saw my dad
reading the paper in the patio. He looked up when he sensed me coming. He took
his beer bottle and smiled at me.

“Dad, I need work.” I blurted out
to him as I sat in front of his seat.

“Okay . . . You need a drink son.”
He sensed my tension and offered his beer to me and I took it. It didn’t take a
minute to finish the almost filled bottle.

“What’s bothering you?” he knew
from my facial expressions and my sudden thirst for alcohol as a sign of
trouble.

“I know you wanted to be a professional
basketball player. I never said no to your passion, so what’s happening now?
Why are you changing plans?” he continued to ask.

On the ride home from the landing
strip, Tara and I didn’t utter a word to each other. It made me think of my
future and my baby’s future. Never even for a second that Rhea came to the
picture. I was never known for irresponsibility, and at the ride home, I can’t
help but focus on my future obligation.

I know if I would choose being a
basketball player, I would get a hefty amount, but I know that when I get
older, I would be jobless. I knew that I need a more stable source of income to
sustain my baby’s growth and afford a better future for him or her.

Luckily, I found my dad when I
arrived. He was the first person I know I had to talk to about my situation. I
knew I had to start working in our company and establish a more secure career.

“Dad, Rhea’s pregnant.”

“Are you sure?” he had mixed
emotions showing in his eyes. I am just 22 and he knows Rhea and I have broken
up months back.

“Yes dad.” I handed him the test
that would confirm everything.

He patted me on the shoulders. “You
know you are most welcome to work in our company. I am proud that you have come
to realize that you have to be responsible for this. What’s your plan?” my dad
has always been calm. He supported me in everything I do.

“I don’t know dad. I don’t want to
marry her and be tied to her for the rest of my life. You see, I love another
girl. If this happened to her, I wouldn’t think twice of marrying her.”

“But son, you know Rhea’s father. I
don’t think he would let you not marry his daughter once he finds out.” My
dad’s voice hinted panic.

“I know dad. I’m scared. I’m scared
for my life, but I really don’t want her.”

“You know, your mom had you the
same age as you are. I married her because I know you need a father, you need
me. Though I was really young and wanted to see more of the world, I still
decided to get married. I knew my son’s life would be better if he had a
complete family.”

“But that’s different. You love mom
and she loves you too.” It was entirely different with me and Rhea.

“Yes . . . and I love you even
before you were born. I suppose you love your child too?”

“Yes.” I quietly succumbed.

“Then you know what to do.”

Goodbye James.

“NO!!!!” I sat up in my bed waking
up from my nightmare. It had always been like this since the paternity test
came out. Every night, I dream of Tara. It was always the last time we were
together.

We were in the car. She didn’t
speak to me for the whole ride from the landing strip until I dropped her in
front of her house. She kept crying silently in her seat. My tears were
incontrollable too. I tried so hard to stop because I was driving, but it was
useless. I drove so slow in my blurry vision.

I didn’t want the ride to come to a
stop. I knew it was the last time Tara and I will be together. I can’t look at
her. I don’t know what to tell her.

Hearing her sobs makes me want to
tell her everything will be alright, but who am I kidding? I want to tell her
we can still fix this, but how? I want to hug her and say we’re never going to
be apart, but I know that’s bull shit. It was officially the worst day of my
life.

When we came to stop in front of
her house, she didn’t bother to wait for me to open her door for her.  But she
looked at me with her puffy eyes still wet from tears.

“Goodbye James.” She finally said.

I can’t find the words to reply. I
just hugged her too tight. I can’t tell her not to say goodbye, because I know
we have to part.

The pain was killing me. I felt my
heart aching. My tears rolled down one more time and she let go of our embrace.
She kissed me in the cheek and she ran inside their gate.

I wake up to that scene over and
over and sometimes I wish not to wake up anymore.

I have locked up myself in the room
for three days already, the only people I talked to were my parents and my
coach. I officially resigned and expressed my apologies. Surprisingly, he
accepted it, maybe he felt pity hearing my voice.

“Rhea,” I said as soon as she
answered the call. I decided we have to talk about our situation.

“Hi James!” of course she can’t
hide the cheerfulness in her voice even at four in the morning.

“Let’s talk tomorrow. I will pick
you up at eleven,” just that and I hung up.

I stared at my phone and opened my
photos, the most recent were Tara’s, the one last happy moment we had together.
Our Boracay experience.

My pretty Tara beaming for me in
all her pictures. How can I let go of her? How can I forget her?

I feel so stupid for being too
late. If I had only noticed her even before I got steady with Rhea. Things
would have been different if I treated my stalker a bit differently.

I smiled in pain as I see her
picture in my phone. God, how will I live? I cried again.

I woke up feeling childish. My
phone beside me and Tara’s face is still there. I kissed my phone and stood up.
I saw how I damped my pillows with tears.

Get a grip James! I keep telling
myself. It’s sad it’s not the end of the world for me, nor the end of my life.
But as they always say, life goes on. Soon, I will have a child to look after
for. He or she will be my life.

I got up. Showered and dressed. I
still have to pick up Rhea and we really have to get that serious talk about
all of these.

At eleven, I was in front of Rhea’s
house. I didn’t want to go down the car. I sent her a message saying that I am
already outside her house waiting for her.

In less than a minute, she was
tapping the window of the passenger side, disrupting my self-pity moments.

“Good Morning.” She kissed me on
the cheeks when she rode the car and then fixed her seatbelt.

I looked at her tummy. Nothing gave
signs that my baby is there. But I know it’s there. Two doctors declared it.
How much more opinions do I need to seek?

I started driving to Metro Alabang
where I thought we should have lunch and talk. It was a very quick drive as it
is just outside our village.

We were strolling in the promenade
and I made her choose the restaurant. It was well-known belief that pregnant
women have cravings. I didn’t do it for her. I just want my baby well and
healthy inside her. I shivered at the thought. Me. The father of Rhea’s baby.

She chose to eat at Kimono, the
Japanese restaurant where we used to eat as a couple. We sat and ordered food
and she just stared at me after the waiter left.

“When will we get married?” hell!
She was straight to the point.

“Would you like it after you give
birth or few months from now?” I asked.

“You’re . . . You’re . . . Marrying
me?” she was surprised.

“I’m marrying you for the baby.”

She immediately stood and embraced
me.

“You will love me again James. I
promise.” She kissed me on the lips and I moved back.

“Rhea, please . . . take your
seat,” I urged her, “I have some conditions.”

She sat back on her seat and eyed
me.

“We will live in a separate house
from neither your parents nor my parents.” I said.

“OK,” she seemed delighted.

“We will sleep in different rooms.”

“Why?” she looked disappointed.

“Don’t ask why, just accept it or I
won’t marry you at all.” I threatened her and she seemed to buy it when she
nodded.

“You and your friends will stay
away from Tara.”

“Tara? What’s that got to do with
us?” she’s starting to get heated.

I didn’t answer and waited for her
to realize that I am not negotiating. I am stating conditions. Irrevocable and
irreconcilable conditions.

“OK.” She agreed when she saw I was
serious.

“Lastly, don’t act as my wife. I
can take care of myself. I don’t want you to go spoiling me on things and I
don’t want you treading on my direction. Never cross my path. What I do with my
life is none of your business.”

She frowned at me and didn’t say a
word.

“Oh, by not acting as a wife, it
also meant no sex. I don’t care who else you sleep with to help you with your
needs. And same as me, you wouldn’t dare try questioning my sex life.”

I saw her infuriating look on me.

“Do you understand?” I asked.

She still didn’t answer. If this
had been a fiction book, I would see hot fumes smoking from her nose and ears.
That’s how annoyed she is.

“Now, when do you want the wedding?
In a few months when your tummy is showing or after you give birth?”

That’s when I saw her eyes lit up.

“I want to be a June Bride.” I
mentally calculated and she was saying she want to get married in two months. I
can’t say no. I keep reminding myself I’m doing this for my baby. I can’t
believe she was that eager. She didn’t think she would have that baby bump when
that time comes.

“OK. I’m giving you 2 million pesos
to budget for the wedding. I don’t care how you want to plan it. I will start
working for my father next week to be able to pay for the wedding and to save
for my child’s future.” I told her expressionless. “Don’t bother asking me for
suggestions on the wedding. It’s your wedding anyway and it’s not mine. It’s my
death sentence.” I didn’t mind telling her how I despise the thought of giving
her my surname.

“Kani Salad, California Maki and
Chicken Teriyaki.” We were interrupted by the waiter who had our orders in his
hands.

“Eat! I want my baby happy.” I
ordered her once the waiter placed the orders in our table.

“Oh baby!” she called to me and
touched my hand.

“I meant MY baby. Not you!” I
removed my hand from her touch and ate in silence.

I can’t believe that she is
agreeing to marry even after all the terms I have set for the stupid marriage.
I find it pathetic. It would have been better if she backed out. That way I
won’t be responsible to face the wrath of her father. But she is impossible.
She obviously didn’t mind. It was either she is that eager to be called my wife
or she was just born to torment me.

Tara’s Point of View

“Michele, can you send me the
documents via my personal e-mail?” I told my secretary through the intercom in
my office.

I started working at the main
office of our resort chain in Ortigas two weeks ago. As Vice President for
Marketing, my father decided that I had enough experience running and planning
the marketing division of Samal and Boracay.  That was why I was summoned to
Manila.

At first, I was so happy with my
father’s assignment for it meant I was going to see James more. But then, the
day I arrived, I was welcomed by a bad news.

I didn’t know how to react seeing
the paper in my seat. At that instant, I wish I didn’t know how to read.
POSITIVE in capitalized bold green letters. It gave me nightmares for the past
two weeks. But here I am, ready to start a new.

Well, actually, I am not ready. I
don’t think I will ever be. But this is how it goes, life doesn’t stop in one
heartbreak. I knew that now. This is already my second. The first one when
James confronted me at the gym. I just hope this is the last.

“Miss Tara, Miguel is here to see
you.” I heard Michele call through the intercom.

“Let him in.” I replied.

“Good morning beautiful!” Miguel
and I had been friends since the day James left Boracay. He never gave hints
that he liked me or anything, but I can tell from his actions.

It was just three days ago that I
told him about my break up with James. Of course he was sorry for me that it
had to end like that. But he promised me, he will never leave me just as he was
there for me when I was left at Boracay.

Miguel is a fine man. Aside from
the fact that he is really gorgeous, he is a man with a heart. He teaches me
Spanish too. But I still don’t get much of it. Just a few words like
como
estas
which means how are you and
que hora es
for what time is it.
He usually asks me that because he noticed I don’t eat lunch on time.

“What brings you here?” I asked
politely.

“All the F&B’s are here for a
general assembly and some catching up with the HR Manager.” He informed me.

“Que hora es?” I laughed at myself.
There he goes again.

“OK OK!” I smiled at him as I knew
exactly what he was driving at.

“Let’s have lunch!”

“Your treat?” I joked him.

“Sure!” he went closer to me and
made me stand up from my chair.

Miguel was summoned to Manila by my
parents as well. They said the new expansion of the company meant a new project
that would need Miguel’s expertise and he was happy about it. We both landed in
Manila the same time, but they left the landing strip a bit later than I did. The
driver that was supposed to pick him and the pilot was late.

“Where do you want to eat?” he
asked.

“Actually I am not that hungry.” I
told him as we started to head for the elevator.

“That’s not good Missy! You must
eat.”

“OK. Can a sandwich be good enough?”
I asked him.

“Big bite sandwich is OK. Not the
teeny weeny paninis!” he knew me so well.

“Fine!” I said as I pushed the
elevator button to ground floor. It’s amazing how this guy has been a friend to
me. He really looks after me. And now that he knows what I am going through, I
can feel he is being extra careful to me, even more than before.

It felt wonderful having a new
friend. Lyn is in America for the rest of summer vacation. From her Facebook, I
see she is mostly out with her cousins. I didn’t want to blurt out about what
happened between me and James. I am relieved too that I didn’t get any messages
from her asking me of what’s happening. Perhaps Christian hasn’t told her yet.

I wonder how Christian reacted from
the news. I never had the chance to talk to him as I hibernated in my
self-built igloo and didn’t want any news from either of them as well. I am
glad someone’s beside me to guide me through all this.

“Thanks Migs.” I smiled and looked
up at him.

“What for?” he asked me half
smiling.

He is really handsome. And he is
really thoughtful and sweet. Perhaps I should divert my attention to him.

“For being here and taking care of
me.”

“Oh! That! I just wanted a salary
raise.” He laughed hard at his own joke. I laughed with him. He knows how to
get my mood high.

We got out of the building and
decided to eat at the café beside. I just ordered ham and cheese panini and he
frowned. He changed my order to a big chicken sandwich with coleslaw. I widened
my eyes at him but he didn’t even react. I’m never gonna have my way with this
guy.

“Tara,” he called to me when he saw
me staring out the window.

“Yeah?” I asked and sighed.

“You’re thinking again.”

“I can’t help it Migs, it’s really
hard for me.” I admitted. It’s only him with me during these trying times and I
can’t allow myself to keep pretending or I would go insane any minute. There
was no one else to talk to and I was so lucky he is with me.

“I am here. Talk to me. It’s better
to get it out than to just keep it to yourself.”

“I know, but sometimes, I just want
to be alone. Sometimes I want to get lost and never come back. It’s really
killing me.” The pain is still fresh even after two weeks. Hell! It’s just two
weeks. I wish I could skip this part and fast forward my life a few years and
hopefully I’ll be okay. I don’t know if I will ever be okay. We had a chance
but we ended up separated. How agonizing. How can life treat me so cruelly?

“If there was only anything I can
do to help you, I would Tara. If I could only take the pain away from you, I
will deal with it myself,” he said feeling so helpless. His eyes were sincere,
his gestures were heartwarming. He was a real good friend and confidant.

“You’re so kind to me. I am so glad
you’re with me.” I continued appreciating his efforts. “But you know that I am
the only person who can fix myself.” I painfully admitted the truth.