His Reverie (17 page)

Conflicted: contradictory, a struggle

July 11
th

I
arrive at Hale House early so I wait in my car the last fifteen minutes before I’m scheduled to clock in, slugging back some cheap-ass coffee I bought at the gas station and listening to the radio. I slept like hell last night after my conversation with David and I’m desperate for a distraction. And at the moment, the distraction I’m most looking forward to is seeing Reverie.

Despite telling myself I don’t deserve her, despite replaying my conversation with Michael over and over again in my head, I still want to see her. Just…breathe her in. See that shy smile. Let myself get lost in her presence for a little bit. She takes all the ugly in my life and makes it beautiful, at least for a few stolen minutes.

I can look right? Just for a little bit?

What’s so stupid is I’m nervous just to freaking look at her. What we shared in the stables feels like it happened months ago. Or maybe that it didn’t happen at all. Like it was some sort of awesome dream I conjured up.

But it wasn’t a dream. I kissed Reverie. She kissed me back. If I’m an idiot, I’ll try and kiss her again even though I shouldn’t.

Yeah. I shouldn’t.

So here I sit, too amped up and anxious to actually see her because I have no idea how she’s going to react when she finally lays eyes on me. Is she pissed at how I just left her in the stables? I had no choice but girls are weird. As in, I never know how they’re going to react. They can get upset over the smallest things. And maybe that wasn’t so small. I was kissing her. She seemed to be really getting into it too.

I know I was.

Memories come at me, one after another and I lean back in my seat and revel in them. Her soft lips. Her wet tongue. The taste of her, sweet and addictive, hooking me instantly. How she felt in my arms, how I wanted to come out of my skin when she touched me…

I hear Reverie before I see her, her voice knocking me from my thoughts. I slouch low in my seat, not wanting her to see me sitting here staring at her like some sort of stalker.

That doesn’t stop me from wanting to get a look at her though. Just…soak her up a little bit before I have to go to work. She’s in the front yard standing next to her mother, talking animatedly. Her hair is down and a little wild looking this morning. She’s got on a sunny yellow dress and with her golden skin and blonde hair she’s like a flash of intense hot summer in the otherwise cool Monday morning.

Reverie throws her arms up in the air, her long blonde hair flying out behind her. Her mom says something in response and Reverie rests her hands on her hips, tapping her sandaled foot on the grass impatiently. I can feel the tension in her from all the way over here. Whatever she’s talking about, it’s got her riled up. I don’t think she’s angry but she’s certainly…passionate. She’s always pretty meek and quiet, especially around her mom so I gotta admit…

I like seeing this.

They’re standing among the various rose bushes that Valerie Hale tends to. And they aren’t looking in my direction either so I lean forward, wrapping my arms around the steering wheel as I rest against it. Reverie seems to calm down and she reaches up, running her fingers through her hair again and again, as if she’s combing it.

My fingers twitch. I remember how soft her hair is. I’m dying to touch those silky strands again…

I punch the steering wheel and mutter a curse under my breath. I’m an idiot. I’m driving myself insane by watching her. Longing for her. It’s fucking stupid.

I’m
fucking stupid.

By the time I’m climbing out of my car to head toward the house, Michael shows up, parking next to me and hopping out of his tiny car full of boundless energy as usual.

“What are you doing? Spying on the Hale ladies?” Michael asks as he approaches. He flicks his head in their direction and I look to see that they’re heading toward the back of the house, their backs to us as they walk side by side.

Thank Christ. I have no desire to explain myself to Michael. He’ll just twist it around to make me sound like some sort of pervert anyway.

“I was waiting for your late ass,” I drawl, playing it off, praying Reverie won’t turn around and see me. Or worse, what if she said something to me? Not likely that would happen since she’s with her mom but still. I’m paranoid.

“Gimme a break. I got here right on time,” Michael says as we walk toward the house. “Your days off were good?”

“Yeah.” I don’t give him any more details because while for the most part my two days off were fine, yesterday’s visit with David still leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

“I saw Heather.” Michael drops this tidbit like it’s nothing. No big deal. But I know it’s a huge deal because I’ve seen him chase after her like crazy while she continues to ignore him.

“No shit?”

“Yeah. I practically attacked her in the back seat of my car Saturday night,” he says with a shrug, that cocky smile on his face telling me he’s pretty pleased with himself.

“She live with her parents too?” Michael comes home every summer to work, though he lives on his own during the school year, when he’s away for college. He’s told me more than once he’s sick and tired of being under his parents’ roof, always having them tell him what to do.

I say nothing. I’d look like a total wimp if I confessed I wished I still lived with Mom. Yeah, I lost her only a few months ago but still. I need to man up. I can handle this on my own.

“Yep. She’s going away to school in the fall, just like I am,” Michael says, our feet crunching on the graveled driveway. “This is definitely going to be a summer romance, nothing more.”

“And you’re okay with that?” I ask, shoving my hands in the pockets of my shorts.

“Do I have a choice? Besides, it’s not such a bad thing, walking into a relationship knowing it won’t last beyond a few months. So yeah, I’m good with it,” Michael says with a shrug. “Really it’s perfect. No strings attached. We walk away from each other at the end of the summer and no one’s feelings are hurt.”

Not a bad idea, approaching the relationship knowing it’s going to end for good in a limited amount of time. Something I could consider with Reverie though I wonder how she would feel about it. She’s not someone to trifle with. She deserves more than a summer fling with a loser like me.

Not that I can do something like this with her anyway. I’m supposed to be giving up on that angle and I need to remember it.

“Plus, working with her, we can sneak off during breaks and get some personal time in if you know what I mean.” Michael waggles his eyebrows at me like he’s some sort of cartoon character, making me laugh. I’d been in such a bad mood since yesterday it felt good.

I shove him away from me. “I better not walk into the storage barn or whatever and find you half naked with Heather, tumbling around in the hay.”

“Like I found you with Rev in the stables?” More waggling of the brows on Michael’s end. “Besides, hay’s too damn scratchy.”

My lungs freeze, making it hard to breathe. “What the hell are you talking about?” I wave my hand, trying to blow off his statement but it feels forced. Phony.

“I’m not blind, dude. She may have been clear across the room from you but something was going down between you and Rev in the stables.” I can feel Michael’s eyes on me, steady and pointed.

I stop walking and so does Michael. “It was nothing,” I lie.

“Bullshit,” Michael says cheerfully. “Deny it all you want. I saw the way you chased after her on the Fourth. And I freaking felt the tension between you two in the stables. You’re still pursuing that even after everything I told you? Are you crazy?”

No way can I answer him. Instead I start walking fast, headed toward the shed near the patio where the Hales keep all their lawn equipment. Michael chases after me like the persistent dog he is, chattering the entire way.

“Listen, if you’re gonna go all balls to the wall and go for it anyway, I’m not going to stop you. Who am I to get in the way of true love? But I need to warn you dude. This isn’t going to be easy.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I say between clenched teeth, glancing around to make sure no one else is listening. Michael’s volume is always high. The guy doesn’t know how to be quiet. The last thing I need is someone else hearing him give me permission to go for Reverie.

“It’s all good if you do like her, dude. I won’t tell a soul. Not even Heather.”

I turn on him, thrust my finger in his face. “Especially not Heather,” I practically growl.

Michael’s smile fades as he throws up his arms in surrender. “Don’t worry. I won’t blow your cover.”

Irritated with my reaction, I drop my hand and turn away from Michael. “It’s nothing between Reverie and me. Nothing.”

“You’re the only one who calls her that you know,” Michael says.

I turn to look at him again. “What?”

“Reverie. No one else calls her that. She’s just Rev.” The smile is back, not as shit-eating as usual though. More like he can see right through me and is realizing that I really do like her.

Which just leaves me feeling weak and vulnerable. And I hate that.

“Rev. It doesn’t fit her,” I mutter, headed toward the shed once more.

“Whatever dude,” Michael calls after me but I ignore him this time. We don’t need to get caught by Valerie Hale talking. She’d love nothing more than to give us twice the work to finish in half the time.

I start my daily washing of the patio, a mindless chore I like to do first thing in the morning, when I’m not one hundred percent awake. Though at the moment I’m hopped up on that extra large cup of coffee I had and I feel all jittery. Or that could just be nerves. I still have no idea how she’ll react the first time she sees me after we kissed. Will she act casual, like it was no big deal? Ignore me completely? Yeah, that would probably be for the best. It sucks though.

Maybe I should go seek her out and get this over with. Be the one to approach her, tell her it was all a mistake and hope like hell she understands. This was all just a fluke. It had to be. Kissing the reverend’s daughter is the stupidest thing I could’ve done since getting out of jail with all charges dropped. I’m supposed to be on the straight and narrow, not playing with danger.

“Nick.”

I about jump out of my skin at the sound of Valerie Hale’s voice and glance over my shoulder to find her watching me with an expectant look on her face. What is up with these Hales always sneaking up on me and surprising me?

I’m both relieved and disappointed to find that she’s alone. Reverie is nowhere to be found.

“Morning, Mrs. Hale.” I turn to face her, making sure the hose isn’t aimed in her direction. I don’t think she’d like it if I accidentally splashed her expensive leather sandals.

“Turn that off.” She waves a hand at the hose, her gesture impatient. She seems irritated. I can’t help but wonder if it has to do with that conversation she just had with Reverie.

Without a word I go and turn off the faucet, then start hurriedly rolling up the hose. “You wanted to talk to me about something?”

“I do.” She approaches me, her steps evenly measured, her back ramrod straight. Her dark blond hair is pulled into a low ponytail and she’s wearing a sleeveless white shirt and matching skirt. She looks extremely put together, not a wrinkle in sight, not a hair out of place.

She’s intimidating as hell. I usually deal with her when Michael’s around. Rarely do we talk alone. I prefer it that way. Why, I’m not sure.

Maybe because every time I look at her, a steady stream of guilt pours over me, making me feel like crap.

Hey Mrs. Hale, what’s up? Oh, you found out I kissed your virgin daughter in the stables? Yeah, no problem. Hope you don’t mind. I just couldn’t resist her. You have to admit she’s pretty damn cute.

Yeah. That wouldn’t go over well.

“Did you steal my daughter’s necklace?” she asks, her voice laced with just enough venom to make me feel like she’s merely scratching my neck with the tip of the knife, not full on thrusting it into my flesh.

I’m so shocked by her question I gape at her like an idiot for a second, unable to form words. “W-what are you talking about?”

“On Saturday, Rev wanted to speak with you. Something about a missing necklace. Do you know anything about a missing necklace?” She raises her eyebrows, waiting for a logical answer from me.

But I don’t have one. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Mrs. Hale,” I say, slowly shaking my head. What the hell? Was Reverie going around accusing me of stealing her necklace? This is the last sort of trouble I need. Is this some sort of revenge plot on Reverie’s part? Because this sort of accusation could royally screw me over.

As in, cost me my job.

“You didn’t
steal
her necklace did you?”

“I would never put my job at risk like that, Mrs. Hale. I swear to you. This job is everything to me. I need it. I would never steal from any of you,” I vow, hoping like hell she believes me.

She studies me, her gaze razor sharp, almost as sharp as her words. Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she purses her lips and I notice the faint lines around them, the bright red of her lipstick. I can see where Reverie got her looks. I remember what Michael said. How she grabbed him last summer and hit on him. I wonder if he was exaggerating.