Hold Me Closer: A Rebel Walking Novel (9 page)

"What about Gus?"

"Him, too." 

"Damn it, Holden.  He's like a brother to me and I promised him that I would call him."

"I'll handle it, but I need you to keep your word that you'll keep from contacting anyone until we know everything is over."

"I don't like it, but I hate being
run off the road even worse.  I'll listen to you, but just promise me that you'll keep me informed about everything.

We get to the cabin and I'm awestruck.  This is the most gorgeous cabin I've ever seen.  Talk about secluded.  There isn't a single soul that could find this place unless they knew exactly where they were going. 

The serene sound of nature calms most of my emotions the second he opens the door.  Stepping out and taking in the scenery surrounding me
is breathtaking and peaceful.  I'm wondering why I've never tried to get away to a private location like this in the past. 

"This is beautiful."  There really are no words to give it justice. 

"Yeah.  I love it out here."  Aiden looks around with a similar respect that I just showed.  This cowboy belongs somewhere in nature like this.  I don't really know much about him, except he seems like a great guy.  Holden speaks very highly of him and I can tell by their interaction that he is someone Holden would do anything for. 

"Do you come out here often?"

"Not often enough."  Both Holden and Aiden pull out bags from the back end of the truck bed.  I don’t even think about my bag being in the other truck until I see Holden with mine.  What a messed up day.  We wanted a weekend we'd never forget.  I guess you have to watch what you ask for.  You just might get it.

Holden

This day has been hell on Lyndsey's emotions.  I cringe every time she asks me questions that I can't fully answer.  Going through what we did today
gives me a whole new look on how dangerous this situation is.  I wish I knew what her brother was going through, but it's obvious it's some major shit. 

The
moment I woke up and saw how scared she was keeps flashing through my mind.  I'm just thankful we managed to get out of there alive. 

"I'm going to pull some steaks from the freezer and fire up the grill.  Do you guys want one?  We don't have much of anything else, so I'll make a trip to town tomorrow morning."

"That sounds good.  I'm going to go check on her."

I find her curled up in the bed crying. 
Damn it.
  I can handle a lot of things, but it makes me insane when I can't fix the reason for someone's tears.  Especially when it's someone that I'm starting to care for.

"Hey, come here."  Pulling her toward me once I
lie down is the only thing I can think about.  I need her to know that I'm here for her. 

"I'm sorry things are such a mess.  We'll get through it."

"I'm just tired of losing everyone in my life.  I mean, seriously, how much more do I have to lose before I've paid my dues?"

"Life is tough.  But you've been through more than most people I know and you're such an inspiration for those who need to know what strength is."

"I don't feel strong."

"You are.  Unlike any other woman I know.  It's what I
adore most about you."  She buries herself into my chest again and we lay there without movement.  My mind is running just as I'm sure hers is.  The only difference is that I'm trying to figure out how to make her understand why I've kept her brother's secret once she finds out.  In my mind, it's one of those things that there's no going back from, but I'm a little crazy protective when it comes to my siblings.

I hold her until she falls asleep.  Slowly sliding out of the bed without waking her is tricky, but I manage.  I figure it's a perfect time to talk to Aiden about a plan and to see if he's heard anything about what happened before.  Curiosity is killing me and I can't wait to hear what happened today after we left.

"Have you heard anything?"

"Yeah.  They have the last guy and they're trying to get him to talk.  It's a good thing we didn't let them take her. 
Those crazy bastards have one of the guys' wives, trying to force the team out of hiding.  The videos they are sending from her are horrid and I'm just not sure how this is all going to turn out.  I just know there's no way we can let them take her after what I'm hearing." 

"What the hell, man
?  I hope we stay under the radar out here.  How long do they think before the mission is over and will she even be safe at that point?"

"I'm not sure of the specifics, but we'll keep her safe until we know she's in the clear.  Hopefully by then
, she'll have good news to learn and this'll all be worth it."

I go in to wake her when the steaks are ready and catch myself watching her in peaceful sleep.  Will she be able to see her brother again one day?  She's been dealt some very harsh blows in life and she deserves to know one of the worst ones is actually not true.  I sit on the edge of the bed and watch her face with every breath.  What's happening to me?  How did she get to me so quickly?  It's not my style to fall this hard, this fast. 

Whatever it is, there's no going back.  I'm all in.  I mean after all I would kill for this girl
.  That's a proven fact.  She's giving me reasons to disrupt my ordinary life and fight for something worth fighting for.  At first I wasn't sure if it was just my protective nature kicking in to protect her because she’s Eaven's friend or if it was something that I felt with her from the first night.  She's complicated, but good things are very seldom simple.

"Hey, are you hungry?"  Trying not to startle her, I brush my hand over her leg as I begin to talk.  She starts to stir, nodding her head
yes
right away.

Chapter Twelve

Lyndsey

I'm emotionally drained from everything that's been happening.  I'm scared and it just seems like I'm going to be hiding forever.  How will I ever be able to go back to my regular life when it just seems like whoever is after me isn't just your everyday run of the mill creep? 

I can't for the life of myself think of what I have that someone would want, let alone someone from another country.  I couldn't even understand them to get a clue of what they're after.  I'm terrified just thinking about trying to be normal again. 

Holden has been so kind and I couldn't imagine getting through all of this without him.  I know he's a great guy, but I just wish we could've connected on a better note.  I don't really do ‘the big strong guy swoops in to save the lame girl’ story.  Trying to hurry so Holden doesn't have to come get me again, I begin my search through the cabin  in hopes of finding food. 

The smell leads me to the kitchen where I find the guys sitting at the table, each of them about to devour a huge steak. 

"Smells great!  Thanks for making me one."

"Anytime.  How are you doing?"  Aiden is ridiculous with his sexy southern drawl.  If I hadn't already met Holden, I'd fall for Aiden's charm in a second.  He's different than most guys and it’s completely obvious, even in the way he carries himself.

"I'll be better when I know what I'm up against.  The not knowing is killing me.  How am I supposed to stay safe when I have no idea what's coming?" 

"You have both of us.  We're waiting on information from my father who has a few details that may give us a better idea."

"What does your dad have to do with this?"  I watch Aiden hesitate and look at Holden before he answers.

"He's working a special case that has something to do with all of this."  

"What do you know so far?" 

"Not much, but we're hoping we'll know something soon."

They both make small talk and I attempt to eat around the gut feeling that something bad is going to happen.  The guys finish first and both stay to keep me company even though I'm not very talkative. 

I eat about half my food and begin to feel the stress of it all.   Holden meets me in the hall after I leave the kitchen and pulls me into his arms. 

"Do you want to go outside with me?"  At this point, it doesn't really matter where I go, so I agree.  It probably wouldn't hurt to get some fresh air.

The view of the night sky is overwhelming and nothing like I've ever experienced.  It looks like there are millions of stars and each one shines clear against the deep black atmosphere. 

"Oh my god.  It's beautiful."

"Yeah.  It's peaceful out here."

"It almost feels like we're the only people in the world."  He pulls me into his arms again as we look into the sky and breathe in the night air for a long time before he leads me off the deck and into the grass. 

The moon is bright and lights our path to his truck.  He lowers the tail gate and helps me up, following quickly behind.  Pushing back until he's in the middle of the truck bed, he lays back, propping his hands behind his head.

"Lay with me."  I fall back into his arms without hesitation and let his hold begin to make me feel like somehow, some way it'll all work out.  I want to believe that more than anything.

"What're you thinking about right now?"  He seems deep in thought even though he's trying to make me relax.

"How good it feels to be able to share this place with someone in my arms."  He pulls me in even closer as he says this and it leaves me speechless as I try to find the right words to tell him how much I appreciate everything he's done for me.  The way he makes me feel is like no other guy has before, and for just a few minutes, I find myself hoping and thinking about the possibilities that could come from this.

We lie together for a long time, only interrupting the serenity a few times for conversation.  It's easy with him.  There's no need to fill space with small talk to ease any awkwardness.  At this point, we're past all of that and it's just nice to have this comforting feeling so quickly.

He slides his hand below my chin to guide it toward his face.  With soft and gentle kisses, he continues to make my heart melt and I almost forget what I'm facing.

A flash of reality hits me and I pull away from his kiss.

"What's wrong?" 

"I'm sorry.  I just wish this whole mess would never have happened.  I'm not used to fighting battles alone.  Kayde was always there for me and he would've known what to do.  I'm not even sure I can go back to my house at this point."

"You're not alone.  I promise to keep you safe as long as there's any danger."  His assurance isn't too surprising.  He's done nothing but prove he's here to keep me safe. 

"Holden, I can't thank you enough for everything you've done to help me."

"There's no need to."

Holden

I could get used to waking up next to her.  The past few mornings have proven that she isn't one of those girls that I'm itching to get away from.  I have to practically drag myself out of bed each day and this morning is no different.  That probably has something to do with how the nights go when I have her in my bed.  There's nothing like hot sex every night to knock a guy out for the count.  

It killed me when she talked about her brother last night.  I know she has no idea that he's alive and I hope she handles it well when she finds out. 

I decide to make a trip to the store early since I woke up before Aiden.  There's a small store about forty-five minutes from the cabin where I can get us enough supplies for a week or so.  It's a peaceful drive and it may give me time to clear my head some. 

Thinking about all of the potential problems she may face is a huge concern for me.  When it comes to something of this caliber, usually escaping to the cabin for a few days won’t solve all the issues, but it helps alleviate the stress..  My only hope for a good ending is that the special ops team finishes with the mission and we get word that it's safe for her to return.

It doesn't take me long to get what I need from the store.  My phone rings as the cashier is checking out my groceries—it’s Talon.  I'm sure he's heard that I've left town by now.

"What the hell, brother?"

"Yeah.  Sorry about that.  I had to get out of town quick and didn't have time to catch you up to speed."

"Well, tell me that you're okay and I don't need to find your ass."

"Nah.  I'm good.  Don't come looking for me.  I'm at the cabin and everything is working out.  Aiden is here, too."

"How long do you think you'll be out?"

"A few days at least, not sure yet.  I'll let you know when I head back."

"Sounds good.  Let me know if you need anything."

"I will.  How's the search for the new guy?"

"Oh, you know.  We're having a hard time finding anyone to replace her."

"I know it's tough, but remember she would've wanted you to move on.  You have to do it out of respect for what she would've wanted."