Honor (11 page)

Her eyes filled with helpless tears: “I realized that I love you.”

“What did you say?”

“You heard me.”

“Say it again.”

She swallowed her considerable pride and sat on the edge of the bed. “Ever since we parted, I’ve been miserable. I’ve tried to forget you, but I can’t.”

He sighed wearily and sagged back against the pillows. “Are you saying you want to marry me after all?”

She stared down at the third finger of her left hand. “Yes. If your offer still holds.”

“Honor, look at me.” When she did so, he said, “If you want me, you’re going to have to forgive me for not telling you about Priscilla. You’re going to have to forget about her. Are you ready to do that?” His voice hardened with resolve. “I’m sorry for what happened to her and the child. I admit that I made a horrendous mistake. But I don’t want it ever thrown up in my face. Do you understand?”

She nodded. “No one is perfect, me least of all. You have so many other fine qualities, I can’t hold this against you.”

“I’ll never make another one like it.” Suddenly his face grew rigid with embarrassment. “With all my money going for school, I’m as poor as a church mouse right now. I can’t even afford a betrothal or wedding ring.”

“Then I’ll just have to buy my own, now, won’t I?”

He turned crimson with mortification. “A man should at least be able to give his bride a ring on their wedding day. What will your aunt think of me?”

“She’ll think you love me enough not to let anything stand in the way of our marriage.”

“But she hired that detective.”

“You mustn’t hold that against her. She was making sure I didn’t get hurt.”

“Still, I don’t think she feels too kindly toward me these days.”

“She went with me to the boardinghouse to find you. She’ll accept you into the family because you’re my husband.”

He stroked her cheek. “You are one woman in a million, Honor Elliott.”

She took his hand and laced her fingers through his. “When I saw you lying there in the boardinghouse, I thought you were dead. That’s when I realized how much I really loved you and what a fool I’d been for sending you away.”

“Then I’m glad I got sick. It was worth it to bring you to your senses.”

When Honor saw blatant desire leap into his eyes, she pulled away. “Oh, no, you don’t, Robert Davis. You’re still too weak for that.”

He grinned and pulled her back so that she fell against him. “I’m still strong enough to kiss you.”

She wrinkled her nose. “I’ll not be kissing you until you’ve had a hot bath.”

He raised his brows in mock indignation. “Are you telling me that I smell, woman?”

“I’ve known horses that smelled better.” Honor laughed and pushed herself away. When Robert made a grab for her, she rose and darted out of reach.

Laughing, he collapsed back against the pillows. “So much for romance.”

“Plenty of time for that later,” Honor said, “once you’re well. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to tell Aunt Theo my wonderful news.”

Theo hid her dismay rather well when Honor told of her intentions at teatime. While Theo felt that Robert Davis was unsuitable for her niece, she realized he was Honor’s choice, and she would respect that. She knew all too well that logic was no match for the blinding power of love.

Still, she couldn’t forget the detective’s report. Robert’s cold, callous treatment of the Shanks girl indicated a serious character flaw. She feared that it would only be a matter of time before this man broke Honor’s heart.

Theo forced herself to smile, then hugged her niece and offered her heartiest congratulations.

On Friday, June 21; Honor awoke thinking, Today is my wedding day.

Just a week ago she had graduated, becoming Honor Elliott, Esquire, and today she would become Mrs. Honor Davis.

She rose, went to the window, flung open the curtains, and was delighted to discover a bright, clear summer day outside. “Happy is the bride the sun shines on,” she recited to herself with a wide smile of anticipation. Then she took a small jeweler’s box from her bureau, opened it, and stared at the plain gold wedding band she had bought for herself. At least no one else would know that the groom hadn’t given it to his bride.

She put the ring away just as there came a knock on her door, and Aunt Theo breezed in carrying a breakfast tray. “Good morning, sweet bride,” she trilled, setting down the tray and hugging Honor. “And never has there been a more beautiful one, I declare.”

Sudden tears sprang to Honor’s eyes. After today she wouldn’t be living in the house that had been her home for the last ten years. She wouldn’t see her aunt every day.

Theo patted her cheek. “Why the tears? This is your wedding day.”

“I’m just feeling a little melancholy, that’s all.” She hugged her aunt again. “I’m going to miss you so much.”

“There, there. You may come back to visit whenever you wish. And who knows? I may have white hair, but I’m not so old that I can’t make a trip to New York now and then.”

Honor laughed through her tears. “I’ll hold you to your promise.” She dried her eyes. “I wish Father were here to give me away and Mother to share in my happiness. I know they’d like Robert.”

“They’d both be so happy for you.” Theo fished through her pockets. “Well, enough tears. I have to give you something.”

Honor’s eyes widened. Theo had already given Honor and Robert their law books when they graduated, along with a wedding gift of two thousand dollars. She was also paying for the wedding itself and letting them spend their honeymoon at High Water, the Tree summer house in the town of Manchester by the sea.

Theo drew Honor over to a chair and made her sit down while she rummaged through her pockets again and removed a small box. “These are for you, to make sure you don’t have a child until you want one.”

Honor opened the box to find dozens of strange rubber cups no bigger than her thumb. “What are these?”

“They are anti-conception devices,” Theo said. “Pessaries.”

Honor’s eyes widened. “Where in God’s name did you get these? They’re illegal. If you got them by mail, you could be arrested and sent to jail.”

Theo raised her brows. “Are you going to turn your own aunt in to the police for having them?”

“Of course not.”

“As you begin your married life, sweet Portia, you’ll discover that no issue is ever black and white. There are shades of gray. This is one of them. Such devices may be illegal, but they shouldn’t be. They give a woman control over her own body and ultimately over her destiny.”

If Priscilla Shanks had had one of these devices, perhaps she would have been alive today.

Theo said, “Since I’ve never been able to have a child, I don’t need them, but I know you will. Would you like me to explain how to use them?”

Honor stared doubtfully at the rubber devices. “Perhaps I should discuss this matter with Robert.”

“Robert is not the one who could conceive a child on your wedding night,” Theo said dryly. “Robert is not the one who will have to give up practicing law to care for a child. I think that gives you more of a say in the matter, don’t you?”

Honor sighed. “I have grave reservations, Aunt Theo. I hate keeping secrets from my husband.”

Theo arched one brow. “All wives keep secrets from their husbands. Has Robert demanded that you have a child right away?”

“We haven’t discussed children at all.”

Theo rolled her eyes in supreme exasperation. “I would suggest that you do, and soon.” She added, “This is a serious matter, sweet Portia. If you should conceive a child, your future will be decided for you. You will become a mother, not a lawyer. Is that what you want?”

“Of course not. At least not yet.” She did want children someday, when she and Robert were settled. “I’ve worked too hard to become a lawyer.” Honor looked up. “Tell me how to use these.”

And Theo did.

“I feel right at home here,” Robert said, staring out over the green Atlantic Ocean sweeping away from the beach to a distant horizon. The sea air smelled fresh today, without the usual salty tang of brine.

Impatience had characterized Honor during their beautiful wedding ceremony in Trinity Church, and later at the sumptuous wedding breakfast held at the Parker House. She couldn’t wait to begin her wedding trip, when she and Robert would be blissfully alone.

Now Honor smiled possessively at her new husband and squeezed his hand. “I’ve always loved this beach at sunset, when the day slows down. The ocean is so quiet, even the waves just whisper.”

“Perfect for me and my bride.” Robert started walking, the dry sand shortening his long stride. He stopped to look at the house nestled in a grove of pine trees beyond the dunes. “How long has your family owned this place?”

“Theo’s husband gave her High Water as a wedding present,” Honor replied, staring down at her wedding ring for the thousandth time and thinking how bare her hand had looked before.

“Generous man.”

“We used to come here every summer for weeks at a time, and in the fall, too, when I wasn’t going to law school.” She looked up at the darkening sky streaked with wide bands of sunset purple and pink. “Now I’ll spend my summers working in a law office.”

Robert smiled. “It won’t be long before we’re spending our summer weekends in Newport with the likes of the Vanderbilts and the Astors.” His eyes glimmered with grandiose dreams. “Perhaps we’ll even own a Newport mansion ourselves.”

She leaned over and brushed his lips with her own. “That’s not important. Being together is what matters.”

“You’re right.” He stopped, took her face in his hands, and kissed her, his soft, sensual lips insistent and arousing.

She pulled away. “Let’s go back to the house.”

The bedroom on the second floor faced the ocean, with two windows wide open to draw the cool summer sea breeze inside, the muffled sound of waves slapping against wet sand, and the occasional mournful cry of a sea gull wheeling overhead.

Honor stood by the windows, waiting for her husband in the fading rose light. Even though she and Robert hadn’t discussed children, she had taken her precautions with one of the anti-conception devices, then unpinned her hair and dressed in a white silk peignoir that felt cool against her warm, expectant skin. She shivered as a sudden gust of wind blew in, billowing both the curtains and her nightgown out like sails.

Robert emerged from his dressing room and stood entranced in the doorway. Honor, usually concealed by high collars, leg-o’-mutton sleeves, and skirts hanging past her ankles, a corset protecting her from questing fingers like armor, now looked enticingly unfettered, so light she could float away. Still unaware of his presence, she stood in profile, her hair as glossy as glass tumbling down over her shoulders in a soft black cloud. The breeze fluttered the frivolous blue satin ribbons on her lace-trimmed nightdress and pressed the light material against her naked body.

Robert felt the familiar stirring and tightening at the silhouette of full, upturned breasts, flat belly, and long thighs. He imagined himself imprisoned and squeezed breathless between those strong legs. He had so much to teach her.

“You’re all mine now.”

Honor started at the sound of Robert’s deep, resonant voice, and turned to find her husband standing in the doorway, watching her out of glittering eyes. He wore nothing underneath his hunter-green silk dressing gown.

“Don’t be afraid,” he said softly, as if he could read her mind. He walked over to the maple bed and extended his hand.

“I’m not.” The physical act of crossing the room bolstered her courage, and she placed her trusting hand in his. She lowered her gaze and blushed. “Well, perhaps just a little. I’ve never—”

“You know I would never hurt you,” he whispered, lifting her chin and looking into the bottomless depths of her eyes.

“I know.”

He tangled his fingers in her hair and rained soft kisses on her forehead, her eyebrows, her closed eyelids, the tip of her nose, and finally settled on her mouth, where he tormented her parted lips with tender nibbles that left Honor’s head spinning.

“You are so beautiful,” he said in a hushed, almost reverent tone, “and I can’t believe you’re mine.” He drew her down to sit on the edge of the bed and undid the tiny white pearl buttons running down the front of her nightgown.

He looked down at her bare breasts, his eyes darkening at the splendid sight. Priscilla had been as big as a cow, always trying to smother him. “You are perfect.”

To Honor’s surprise, he knelt at her feet while she still sat on the edge of the bed. He reached up to fill his hands with her breasts, his touch both hot silk and fire. Honor closed her eyes, her head fell back, and a groan inadvertently escaped her.

The welcome, tense knot of pleasure slowly started to unravel deep within her belly, enslaving her senses. When Robert’s mouth closed over a straining nipple, Honor cried out, unprepared for the intensity of her response, and buried her fingers deep in his hair.