Hot Mess (13 page)

It touched her and broke her heart all at once. And she couldn’t convince him it didn’t matter because to him it did.

His phone rang on the fourth morning of their seclusion and they looked at each other for a long moment. Her heart thudded every time it happened, but so far it hadn’t been the call he’d been waiting for. This time, however, he looked so solemn as he answered that she knew it was time.

And she knew what she had to say, knew what was expected of her. She was ready for it.

Sam’s eyebrows climbed his forehead. “Really? Holy fuck… Just like that, huh? ... Lucky break… Yeah, yeah… She’s fine… Yeah… Copy.”

When he ended the call, he just sat there for a second, staring at her. And then he reached over and hauled her into his arms. “It’s over, Georgie. You’re safe.”

She wrapped her arms around him and held on tight. “How? Are you certain?”

“Yeah. They were operating out of a house in Greenbelt that the FBI had under surveillance. There’s a witness who saw Hamilton there a couple of times. And we found video of the guy you saw, Abdullah al Fahd, close to the spot where Hamilton’s body was found. The time stamp puts him there around the time of death.”

Her heart hammered hard. It didn’t seem real after the last few days of isolation and fear and preparation. “Is that enough? Will they be able to keep him over something like that?”

“There’s more to it than that, but yeah, he’ll go down for Hamilton’s death.”

“And the other guy? The one who threatened me in the coffee shop?”

His mouth tightened for a moment. “Gone. He was onboard a United Airlines flight to Cairo two days ago.”

Georgeanne lay her head against Sam’s shoulder and breathed a shaky sigh. “It didn’t end quite the way I expected it to.”

He squeezed her. “No, it ended far better. Sometimes it does, when things work the way they’re supposed to. The cell was under surveillance and they made a mistake. Good for us, bad for them.”

She leaned back and ran her fingers over his jaw. His eyes softened and her heart turned over as tenderness flooded her. She was glad it was over—and sad too, because once they were no longer forced to spend time in a confined little cottage, Sam would probably find it easy to avoid her.

“I want you,” she said softly. “So much.”

He turned his head and kissed her palm. “I want you too, Georgeanne. But there’s no time.”

She blinked. “No time?”

“Someone’s coming to take you home.” He stood and put her on her feet while she could only gape at him, her world crumpling in on itself in ways she hadn’t expected.

“Why aren’t
you
taking me?”

He looked solemn. “Duty calls, babe. I have a plane to catch and a war to fight. I don’t know when I’ll be back.”

“Wow.” Hurt swirled inside her, filling her with pain. She wanted more, and he wasn’t going to give it to her. He really wasn’t. And this was it. The end. He was going to use this as a reason to cut himself off from her. She knew it simply by looking at his face. “So this is how it ends, then? So long, thanks for the sex, and maybe I’ll see you?”

“I told you this would happen. This is my life, Georgie.”

He had told her, but she hadn’t thought he meant he’d have to leave
right fucking now
. She hadn’t been prepared for that. In the distance, she could hear a sound she hadn’t heard the whole time they’d been out here in the Maryland backwater. Something large and mechanical was coming toward them—and then she realized what it was. The
whop-whop-whop
of a helicopter’s rotors beating the air.

“There’s nowhere for that thing to land,” she said. It was the first thing to pop out of her mouth, and the farthest thing from what she wanted to say.

Sam, I love you. Come back to me. I need you.

“Nope,” he told her. He went over and hefted the giant pack he’d left sitting in the corner the entire time they’d been here. And then he walked outside and waited while the helicopter got closer and closer.

“This is it? No goodbye?” Her eyes filled with angry tears and she berated herself for sounding so damn needy and upset. But her world was tipping on its axis and she was losing her footing.

His dark eyes raked over her. “I’ve been saying goodbye to you for two days, Georgie-girl.”

She folded her arms over her breasts. “Yeah, but
I
didn’t know it.”

He snaked one arm around her and tugged her close. Then he lowered his head and kissed her, his tongue sweeping into her mouth and making her ache with need and want and sadness.

“Goodbye, Georgeanne. Take care of yourself.”

“You’ll be back, Sam. It’s not like you’re leaving forever.” She knew it logically, yet it still made her panicky the way he was talking.

“I’m not leaving forever. And I
will
see you again. But maybe you’ll have realized by then that it’s never going to work between us.” He grinned at her with that sexy smile of his. “It was fun, G. You’re pretty spectacular—and Tim’s a douche.”

Her heart hammered as desperation and fear seeped into her. “You better come back and see me. I mean it.”

He kissed her again, swiftly, then let her go and went out onto the driveway. The helicopter swooped in, the trees and grass blowing and twisting in the wind. Georgeanne put a hand on the railing and held on, though she was in no danger of blowing away. She felt like it though. Felt as light and insignificant as dandelion fluff.

A line dropped from the craft and a man rappelled down it. Then a ladder appeared and Sam stepped on. The helicopter started to rise even as he climbed. As she watched, a hand came out and tugged him into the open door.

And then the helicopter banked and zoomed out of sight.

Her heart hurt. Just hurt. Sam McKnight was gone and she had no idea when she’d see him again. Or even
if
she would. She had no clue what Sam was thinking. No freaking clue. What if he put in for a transfer or something? Or just never came to see her once he returned?

“Dr. Hayes?”

She blinked at the man standing on the lawn in front of her where Sam had so recently stood.

“Yes?”

“Soon as you’re ready, ma’am, I’ll drive you back to DC.”

CHAPTER NINE

“WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED, Georgie? First there was a guy and now there’s no guy.” Rick sounded exasperated with her. And more than a little worried.

Georgeanne sighed and shoved her hair back from her face.

“I made him up so you’d stop bothering me.”

Of course it wasn’t true, but she wasn’t telling her brother about Sam. Or about the blissful few days she’d spent wrapped in his arms in a cottage in Maryland.

Her heart ached every time she thought of Sam. She hadn’t seen him or heard from him since he’d climbed into a helicopter three weeks ago and left her standing on the front step alone. He hadn’t been kidding when he’d said his life was unpredictable.

Rick sighed. “Mother worries about you. I’m just trying to make sure you’re all right since she won’t ask you herself.”

“She won’t ask because she knows I’m a grown woman and I can take care of myself.” Georgeanne tapped her pencil against the desk in her home office. “Rick, honestly, I’m happy with what I’m doing. I love my house, I love my job, and I’m not ready to jump into a relationship with anyone. And while we’re at it, I don’t appreciate you asking Sam to check on me. He has an important job and he doesn’t have time to chase me down just because you ask him to.”

“You’re right,” he said on another sigh. “I shouldn’t have asked him. I tried calling him recently, but he must be out of the country again.”

“He said something about going on a mission. I don’t know where.”

“How’d he look? Did he seem all right?” She could hear the concern in her brother’s voice and it softened her attitude just a bit. Rick was a worrier by nature. When he loved someone, he was always concerned about how they were feeling. It was sweet, especially considering how tough her brother was in other ways.

“He seemed fine. It was good to see him.”

“You still got a crush on him?” She could hear the laughter in his voice, but it was no laughing matter to her.

“And what if I did? Would you freak out if I went out with him?”

She could almost see Rick’s face. He’d be blinking right about now. Processing what she’d said. “It would be a little weird for me, sure. He’s my best friend and you’re my sister. But I suppose I’d get used to it. Why? Is there something you aren’t telling me?”

“Not at all. I just like yanking your chain.” Because some things were private. Not only that, but her brief affair with Sam McKnight seemed to be over and done. There was nothing to tell.

They talked for a few more minutes—about Hopeful, about their mother’s upcoming garden party, about their father’s golf trip, about Rick’s wife and kids—and then hung up with a promise to speak again soon.

Georgeanne stared at the phone and heaved a sigh. Talking to Rick, hearing the laughter of his kids in the background, talking about their parents—everything about it made her feel her loneliness keenly. Some days, she thought returning to Hopeful was a good idea.

But she usually came to her senses before she put the house on the market and started to pack.

Georgeanne worked on the syllabus for her next class, which started on Monday, and then decided it was time for bed. She went up to her room, got undressed, and climbed under the covers with her book. Belle jumped on the bed and proceeded to take a bath.

“We lead an exciting life, don’t we, Belle?”

The cat didn’t answer, and Georgeanne gave up on her book and turned on the news. And then she must have dozed off because the ringing of her phone scared the hell out of her. She grabbed it from the bedside table. When Sam’s name popped up on the screen, she nearly dropped the phone as she tried to slide the bar before it went to voice mail.

“Hello?”

There was silence on the other end and her heart fell. Dammit, she’d missed him. Would he leave a message? Did she even want him to? Or was it better if she just considered the time in the cottage to be the coda to their relationship?

“Hey there, G.”

He sounded so good. Her shoulders sagged with relief—both that she’d caught the call in time and that he obviously wasn’t dead.

“Hey, Sam. Long time, no hear.”

He chuckled softly. “Yeah. I told you that could happen, didn’t I?”

“You did. I just didn’t realize you meant quite so literally or quickly.” And she was still processing how she felt about it, especially since he was now calling her up out of the blue. It wasn’t quite the same as her and Tim inhabiting different orbits while in the same house, but still.

“That’s what life with me is like, babe. Here one day, gone the next. Radio silence for weeks. I tried to tell you.”

“I know, and I appreciate it.”

“Still think it’s something you can handle?”

Georgeanne nibbled the inside of her lip. She’d been thinking about that a lot while he’d been gone. And though there was no easy answer, there was only one she could give. Because when it came right down to it, she needed him in her life. “I’ll learn to handle it.”

“Are you sure about that? Because it won’t be easy, G.”

She swallowed as tears welled behind her eyes. “I know. But you’re worth it, Sam. You’re worth it to me.”

He didn’t say anything and she strained to hear him, wondering if he’d hung up on her.

“You still there?”

“Yeah, I’m here.”

She let out a shaky sigh. “So where are you now? Back in the CONUS?” She loved that she could use military lingo with him and know, at least a little bit, what she was talking about.

She thought he might be grinning. “I am.”

“Which part of the CONUS?”

This time he laughed. “You like saying that, don’t you?”

She smiled. “Who wouldn’t? The military has such interesting terms for things, don’t you think? CONUS for continental US. TDY. AWOL. Hoo-ah. It’s fascinating.”

“I didn’t call you for a lesson on military acronyms, babe.”

“No, I don’t suppose you did.” Her heart was filling with warmth as they talked. It was a strange conversation in some respects, but if he was calling, then he must care at least a little bit. “So where are you right now then?”

“Right now?”

“Right damn now.”

“Standing on your front steps. Wondering if I should ring the bell or go.”

Georgeanne gasped. And then she dropped the phone in her haste to get out of bed. “Don’t you dare leave, Sam!” she yelled as she grappled for the phone.

She ran down the stairs and yanked open the front door. Sam stood there with his phone to his ear. He lowered his arm slowly. They stared at each other.

“Looking kinda sexy in my shirt, G,” he said softly.

She crossed her arms self-consciously. She was wearing one of his T-shirts that he’d left in the cottage. It was not sexy. It swam on her. But it made her think of him, and so she wore it anyway even though she got hot in the middle of the night and had to sleep on top of the covers.