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But Zoe also knew those were options Joey had considered before and if they didn’t

convince him to move out to L.A., she surely wasn’t going to do it, neither.

Defeated. That was it. Defeated and deflated. The argument was over and so was their relationship. If she didn’t move to New York to be with Joey, there was no point of being together. They both were getting tired of doing long-distance and moving in was the logical next step. Marriage was out of the question for both and Zoe didn’t want Joey to propose to her for the sake of keeping them together. Should they both lean towards marriage, she wanted a sincere proposal and not one out of desperation and guilt.

Joey had another day in L.A. but Zoe believed he overstayed his welcome. The moment

Zoe left for work in the morning would be the time Joey would leave for New York and not return.

She made the right decision for them both. There was no point of dragging out their

relationship if neither one wanted to make the leap. It didn’t stop the feeling that it felt like a mistake.

Twenty-Five

Of course it’s raining. Why wouldn’t it be?

Zoe stared out into the pouring rain, slowly sipping her hot chocolate while she heard and felt the noise pound against her windows and on the sidewalk. She almost couldn’t make out the street in front of her and it was a good thing she called off from work. She wouldn’t have to tackle driving to Fits and Giggles and protecting herself from the other insane Southern California drivers, who seemingly forget how to drive in rainy weather.

Dreadful.

Losing a day of pay wasn’t Zoe’s concern. The real reason why she called off from work was too obvious. The weather outside matched exactly how she felt inside – dissilient despair and regret. It had been several weeks since she and Joey broke up and time seemingly slowed down to a trickle. She had barely slept and when she did manage to sleep, she mostly tossed and turned.

She gave up a relationship with the best man she knew because of reasons she wasn’t sure of. Her career? Blossoming. His career? On the steady rise. Moving so far away from her family, only seeing them on certain holidays and special occasions? That could work with special Skype sessions every week and access to Joey’s frequent flyer miles.

It all made sense at the time. None of it made sense at the moment.

Joey promised to take care of Zoe and she believed him. She would have everything she wanted and the word
no
wouldn’t be an option – ever. Zoe would have complete freedom to do whatever she wanted, when she wanted, and how she wanted. All Joey would have to do is make a phone call and whatever Zoe wanted, she would get.

It sounded good in her head but she also knew the invisible strings attached. She could already hear the whispers within the fashion industry about being bankrolled by not one but
two
D’Amato brothers, one whom she was in a romantic relationship with. She would be, in not so many words, Joey D’Amato’s kept woman. It was a fact that was proven without anyone saying a word.

Whenever she was in New York, she was treated differently as if she was some type of celebrity, being seated at the finest restaurants and having special attention at the designer stores she loved to frequent. NYPD seemingly knew who she was and offered protection, without Zoe asking details – a benefit from Art.

For every special treatment, however, Zoe wondered how many of Joey’s past women

received that same special attention.

Pride. It was one of the seven deadly sins and it didn’t take much for Zoe to figure out how that one sin had taken down kingdoms, rulers, and tribes. Was it her pride that was keeping her from Joey? Maybe, she could admit that much.

All of her life, Zoe had to constantly prove herself to others. She had to prove, just because her parents were wealthy and influential doctors, she wasn’t a spoiled, rich brat who always got what she wanted. She had to prove just because she had model looks, it didn’t equate to her being stupid and entitled.

Now Zoe had to prove to Joey that she would be just fine without him. That was a simple task within itself. The hard part, however, was proving that same point to herself. Zoe’s pride was everything to her but she was starting to think the price of it was something she could no longer afford to keep.

****

A bride-to-be’s loud exclamation downstairs in the showcase room knocked Joey off his concentration block. He submerged himself under mountains of paperwork, going over them twice, sometimes three times to make sure he didn’t miss a single thing. He knew he didn’t. He went over the same paperwork several times before that but he needed a distraction.

Anything. Everything.

He wanted to hate Zoe. He wanted to call her up and curse her out. He wanted to wipe away every single memory he had of her. The harder he tried, however, the more difficult it became.

Zoe was permanently etched in his brain and she wasn’t going anywhere, no matter how much Joey hated it.

Battona. Figa. Baldracca. Donnaccia.
All of the vulgar words could apply to Zoe. None of them applied to her. She wasn’t a whore or a prostitute. She was a woman with ambitions and goals – none that included Joey. He had been so used to being that guy who the girls wanted to be with because of his name and money. Then came a woman who didn’t care about any of it. If anything, it seemed Zoe was more annoyed with him being a D’Amato.

She wasn’t, however, annoyed with the benefits that came with being a D’Amato

paramour. If there was a designer handbag Zoe wanted, Joey got it for her. She saw a fancy pair of earrings; it was delivered to her that same day. Her smile was one of his favorite body parts on her tall and lithe body. Her whole face lit up like a child’s, with her eyes sparkling.

This is so beautiful. I can’t wait to save up and buy it one day.

Why wait, regina? I’ll buy it for you now.

Joey, you don’t have to.

What if I want to? You want it and I want to give it to you. It’s a win-win, baby.

That conversation took place more often than not. If Joey didn’t know better, he would’ve thought it was a game that Zoe played, always trying to get him to buy things for her. She had her own money, though, as evident with the fancy trinkets she would gift him, including the very expensive watch he was currently wearing.

Fuck.

He blew out an exasperated sigh and concentrated harder on the contract in front of him, trying to push out the thoughts of Zoe assaulting his brain. It seemed whenever he pushed out one thought, it was simply replaced with another one. The current image was almost too much to bear – a naked and eager Zoe writhing underneath his large frame as he pushed into her.

You feel so good inside my pussy, baby.

Zoe turned into an unbridled porn star with nothing being too risqué or taboo. Joey could still remember her soft moans, eventually morphing into profanity-laced screams as they made love. They both had worn their rug burn scars as badges of honor and promised to repeat the same action once they were healed. Her mouth was hot and experienced, with her lips and tongue wrapping around his cock as she deep throat him. Her tight and wet slit beckoned him at all hours of the day and Joey found himself irritated when he had to go to work when he just wanted to stay home and fuck Zoe into oblivion. Whenever she wanted to try new positions, Joey’s cock swelled up with hot anticipation, anxious to go home and test them out, burying himself deep inside her to the hilt, over and over until they were completely exhausted.

I can’t be who I want to be when I’m with you.

The words haunted him, keeping him up at all hours of the night, wondering what the hell she meant. Who did she want to be? What was he doing that was stopping her? He gave her everything she could ever want and she still rejected him. Cold. Heartless. Making accusations that he wanted her to be his “kept woman” and not pursue her career.

It was bullshit. It was
all
bullshit. He supported her career. He wanted to introduce her to friends of his within the fashion industry, people he had known for years and would help her with the clothing line.

Was it too soon? Was it too late? Was it too much? Was it
not enough
? Joey didn’t know and couldn’t answer. What he
did
know was it would be the last time he would get so enchanted with a woman like that ever again. Just thinking about her made his fists clench in anger and his heart swell with sadness and regret.

Never, ever again.

“Joey!”

A familiar voice shook him out of his catatonic state. “Oh hey, Zerrin. How long have you been there?”

“How long have I been here?” Zerrin repeated as she walked over to his desk and sat in front of it. “Long enough to know you’re not that deep in thought over a business deal.”

Joey contemplated how much he wanted to reveal to his sister-in-law about his personal life. He knew how close all of the D’Amato women were; Zoe by extension. Whatever he revealed to Zerrin would eventually be heard in Faith’s ears, then Tiana’s, and lo and behold, Zoe’s. That would all happen within five minutes.

It was a risk Joey was willing to take. “Can I talk to you about something?”

Zerrin picked up the concerned tone in his voice. She immediately closed the office door behind her and sat in front of Joey. “Sure. Is everything okay?”

“It’s…it’s…” Joey gave up trying to hide his feelings about Zoe. For the first time in his life, a woman made him speechless and not in a good way.

“Zoe?” Zerrin asked and Joey slowly nodded. “What happened?”

What happened? That was a damn good question and Joey didn’t know the answer to it. He could only assume so much until he came to the conclusion that he was just as lost as before. “I gave her everything and she still left me. I don’t get it. Whatever she wanted, I got it for her. She wanted nice jewelry, it was done. She wanted to try out a restaurant that had a three-month long reservation list? I called the owner and got us a table that night. I just don’t get it. The world was at her fingertips and she still walked away.”

“You mean
your
world was at her fingertips and she walked away?” Zerrin replied.

“Yeah, I just said that.” Joey nodded.

Zerrin puckered her lips to stop the smirk from spreading. “I don’t think you realized what you said exactly, Joseph.”

“Clue me in.”

“You just said you gave everything she wanted, correct? The real question is: did you give her everything that she
needed
?”

“I just said that!” Joey defended.

“No, you didn’t.” Zerrin corrected, “you just said you gave her what she
wanted. Wanted.

You didn’t give her what she
needed
. What did you get out of giving her everything? How did she react to receiving all the things, besides complaining about her career? When was the last time she showed you a sketch? You gave her everything but what were you expecting to get out of this generosity?”

“She never complained,” Joey defended, “she took the gifts, trips, and cash with a big ‘ol smile on her face and kept it moving.”

“She didn’t complain or she wasn’t
allowed
to?” Zerrin inquired.

Joey’s eyes narrowed at his sister-in-law. “I don’t think I like your implications.”

Zerrin lightly chuckled. “And you just proved my point.”

“Which is?”

“Joey, I’ve asked you several times what were you expecting to get out of your generosity to Z and you sidestepped the question completely. Your
selfless
act was really a
selfish
one. You felt if you kept her laced up with the latest designer garb and your lifestyle that would be good enough. You said you supported her dreams but when was the last time you accompanied her to a fashion show? To a fabric store? Joey, what did Z do when she visited you here besides being your bed buddy for a few days out of the month? You went to work. What did she do? Where was she?”

Joey stared out into the sunny spring day and rubbed his chin with an index finger. “At home.”

“At
your
home.” Zerrin tightened her lips. “You gave her everything
you
thought would make her happy and satisfied. You didn’t give her what
she
wanted. Anyway, I need to get going. I have to prepare for a lecture for my Sexual Health course. Why don’t you stop by for dinner tonight with me and Nick? I’m sure he has some good advice to give you.”

Joey quietly groaned. He loved his older brother, Nicky, but he wasn’t considered to be the sympathetic one out all of them. Joey would normally talk to Eli, but he was too busy saving his marriage to Faith. Joey’s partner-in-crime, Tony, was pursuing a new relationship with an old friend.

And Joey
really
didn’t want to get Kieran involved no matter how tempted he was. With a newborn and a toddler in the mix, not to mention running his daycare and supporting Zoe in their fashion line, Kieran probably wouldn’t have the time nor the
want
to care about what Joey was feeling and thinking.

Maybe talking to Nick wouldn’t be that bad. “Sure. What time should I come by?”

“Seven? Does that work?”

“Sure. I’ll bring some wine for me and Nick. I’ll bring you water.” Joey smiled.

Twenty-Six

“You what?”

Zerrin knew bringing up the extended invitation she gave to Joey was going to be a

delicate topic for Nick. He loved his brothers and could honestly say he had a close relationship with all of them. But he was also very vocal about his disapproval of Joey’s treatment of women.

“I invited Joey over for dinner tonight,” Zerrin looked up at Nick. She was bound with her arms tied behind her back and her ankles bound. She was currently servicing her Master with her mouth when He abruptly took His cock away from her. “He wanted to talk to us about Zoe.”

Nick groaned and tensed up. The last thing he needed was talk to his brother about his love life. Any problems Joey had, Nick reasoned, was because of Joey. No ifs, ands, or buts about the matter.