If Forever Comes (23 page)

Gentle laughter seeped from Elizabeth. “Of
course, sweetheart.” Then Elizabeth softened into the embrace, her
hold tight as she clutched Lizzie to her, then stroked an
affectionate hand through the long locks of Lizzie’s hair. Palpable
emotion swelled between them. “You have a fantastic day, my sweet
girl. I’ll be thinking about you.”

Lizzie had her face buried in her mother’s
stomach, the words muffled as she hugged her a little closer.
“Okay, I will.”

I drew in a faltering breath. Thankfulness
surged. God, seeing the two of them like this, the love shared
between them, it was as if it healed a small piece of the wounds
still smoldering inside me.

With a soft smile, Elizabeth nudged her back.
“Go on or you’ll be late.”

Turning, Lizzie rushed out into the day.
“Let’s go, Daddy!” She grabbed my hand and began to lead me down
the walkway. Still lost in the sensations that had swirled between
my girls, I hazarded a glance over my shoulder. Elizabeth watched
us go. For the first time, she didn’t look away.

I slowed to a stop, just before we rounded the
corner to the driveway. I stared at the woman I was so desperate to
put back together. Still, I was at a loss at how to do
it.

Unmistakable sadness poured between us. All I
wanted to do was turn around and take her in my arms, touch her
face, kiss her. Love her.

Unaware, Lizzie tugged at my hand. “We gotta
hurry.”

Elizabeth blinked and the wall was back
up.

With a resigned sigh, I turned and followed
Lizzie to the car.

Five minutes later, I pulled to the curb in
the circular drive in front of Lizzie’s school. She jumped out the
back door and onto the sidewalk just as I came around the front of
the car. Crouching down, I helped her slip her backpack onto her
shoulders. I dropped a quick kiss to her forehead. “Have a great
day, sweetheart. I hope you have a great time at your
sleepover.”

A dimpled grin split her face. “It’s going to
be the best day ever.”

Warmth seeped into my skin, my little girl, my
light. When it seemed impossible to smile, somehow this child made
it unstoppable. I cupped her cheek, tilted my head with the force
of that smile. “You’d better hurry. We’re running a little bit late
today.”

She turned and jogged off.

“See you tomorrow,” I called.

“See you tomorrow!” she sang as she looked at
me over her shoulder.

I lifted my hand in a pensive wave. She headed
back toward the entrance. She veered when she saw Kelsey standing
beside her dad’s car at the curb.

Every muscle in my body
constricted.

Lizzie came to a stop at Kelsey’s side. From a
distance, I watched her tip her head back and laugh unrestrained.
And that asshole was there, laughing, too. Then the piece of shit
reached out and ran his fingers through my daughter’s
hair.

Motherfucker.

My hands clenched into fists at my side in the
same second he glanced up to catch my stare. He turned back to
Lizzie and Kelsey, said something else before the two rushed toward
the school gates.

Anger curled, wound with the possessiveness
that spun me into a frenzy. My head pounded, and I was pretty sure
I was close to losing my mind.

Lizzie’s words of last week blared into my
senses, how excited she’d been, how much fun they’d had.

And Elizabeth had been different. Happy?
Almost. Maybe. I shook my head. I didn’t know. But definitely
different.

Fuck.

I raked a shaky hand through my
hair.

Was she seeing him?

I cut my eye back to him, searching for some
kind of indication. A sign.

Had he touched her?

Images of Elizabeth with Logan crashed into my
consciousness, clashing with everything I knew as right. I couldn’t
bear it. I squeezed my eyes closed to block them out.

When I opened them, he was gone, and I was
left standing there like the fool I’d been all these months,
staring at the spot where he’d been.

I moved to my car, my feet heavy, weighted, as
if I were wading upstream, losing my balance as I got caught in the
undertow.

My head spun.

Blindly, I drove to my office. I clicked my
door shut behind me, sank into my desk chair, and stared out at the
sailboats that bobbed in the bay as I tried to mentally plough
through the mess that had become my life. Tried to make sense of it
all. That anger just surged, stoked a jealous rage inside of
me.

Would Elizabeth really do this to me? To
us?

God, I couldn’t imagine touching another
woman. Ever. Not after Elizabeth had touched me the way she
had.

The morning passed in a haze. A heavy fog
swirled through my head. It contradicted the distinct itch I had
bolt, to get the hell out of the suffocating confines of my office.
When I couldn’t tolerate it any longer, I rushed out, told my
secretary I would be back soon, and got in my car and drove. The
destination was clear, though I had no idea what I would say when I
got there.

The only thing I knew was I couldn’t let her
go.

I pulled up to the curb in front of her house.
Midday sun glared down from the sky, cast glinting rays through the
windshield. The myrtle trees rustled in the gentle breeze. The
little house looked so quaint, so quiet.

No one would have a clue of the pain we’d
harbored here.

Sucking in a few resolved breaths, I pushed
down all the anxiety of the unknown. All I knew was I had to talk
with her, to lay it all out. I needed to tell her I loved her, and
I could no longer go on living without her. Convince her she needed
me as much as I needed her.

Leaving my car on the street, I ran up the
sidewalk and pounded on her door. Agitation prickled at my nerves,
and I scrubbed my palms over my face. Waiting, I paced.

“Come on, Elizabeth,” I begged below my
breath.

But there was no answer, no rustling or
movement from inside.

Undaunted, I pressed my face to the window to
the left of the door, peered inside at the stillness of the family
room. A load of laundry lay in an unfolded heap on the couch, toys
strewn across the floor.

She was probably in bed, the way she always
was, hiding from the realities she didn’t want to face.

Maybe I’d been wrong before. Maybe I’d pushed
her into something she wasn’t ready for.

But now…there was no question.

It was time.

I pushed past the boundaries that had silently
been set. Fumbling with my keys, I produced the one I hadn’t used
in so long. Metal scraped as I slid the key into the lock. I pushed
the door open to the silence that echoed back. Swallowing down the
lingering reservations, I headed upstairs.

Our bedroom door sat just ajar. A slit of
sunlight burst through the crack and shined against the hall
wall.

I edged forward, cautious, and quietly called
her name. God, I’d probably scare the hell out of her, sneaking up
on her like this, waking her from sleep.

But there was no response, just more
silence.

I touched the door. It creaked open. Her bed
was unmade and empty. I inched forward, listening for movement from
the bathroom. There was none.

Shit.

My movements were almost frantic as my
attention shot around the room.

She was gone.

Elizabeth was never gone. I’d always banked on
this, that she was lost in sleep, and that one day, she would
wake
. Fear gripped me when I realized she already
had.

I just didn’t know what she’d awakened to,
where her heart had found her.

I ran downstairs, searched the rest of the
house, peered into the backyard to no avail.

She was gone.

I ran back out front. On the sidewalk, I came
to a standstill. My hair flitted around my face as the wind came
up, stirred along the ground, whipping up the fallen
leaves.

What the hell was I supposed to do?

I pulled my cell phone from my pocket,
scrolled through, called her. She didn’t answer.

I left no message. This needed to be done
face-to-face.

It was hell forcing myself back to go back to
the office for an afternoon meeting I had. I was pointless, really.
There was no focus, just images of her, the need that steadily
built in my gut. The only thing I could see was Elizabeth. My
life.

The second the meeting was adjourned, I headed
straight for the door. I drove, my mind reeling and my heart
pounding.

I couldn’t let this happen.

I wouldn’t.

This was my
family
. A family I’d always
promised I’d fight for. That I’d live for.

Monday night had made me realize I
wasn’t.

No more. I refused to sit stagnant. I wouldn’t
let what was most important to me be ripped away.

I wouldn’t let him have them.

I jerked my car to a stop in front of Natalie
and Matthew’s house. I jumped out.

What I was doing here, I didn’t really know.
But other than me, Matthew and Natalie knew Elizabeth best. They’d
taken care of her through the roughest times in her
life.

This, it was the greatest tragedy either of us
had ever faced. She had to have gone to them. Another shot of
jealousy hit me. I wanted to be that person, the one Elizabeth
turned to in her time of need. How had we pushed each other away
when we needed each other most?

I banged at their door.

Movement rustled from the other side, and the
door opened to Matthew. Uncertainty lined every inch of his face,
his eyes narrowed in distinct concern as he took in the mess that
had to be my expression. “Christian…hey, man. Are you okay?” He
peered behind me as if he were looking for an explanation before he
turned his focus back on me. “What’s going on?”

I shouldered by him and began to pace in the
small entryway just inside their house. Every second that passed, I
felt myself crumbling, my spirit thrashing, my control slipping a
little closer to the edge. I tore at my hair before I looked back
at the disquiet that had taken over Matthew’s entire
demeanor.

He placed placating hands out in front of him.
“Hey man, I don’t know what’s going on, but you need to cool off.
You look like you’re about five seconds from having a
coronary.”

I blinked, swallowed, tried to rein it in. It
left me in a ragged exhale that trembled through my chest. “Is she
seeing him?” I demanded.

I felt Natalie’s presence emerge behind me at
the end of the hall.

“Who?” True confusion seemed to saturate
Matthew. He let the door swing shut as he turned to fully face me.
“What are you talking about, Christian?”

I shot a glance at Natalie, who squirmed,
restless as she pressed her hand to the wall, as if she were
holding herself up. Uncertainty washed her face as she
frowned.

I jerked my attention back to Matthew. “You
two need to tell me what is going on with Elizabeth. Is she seeing
that asshole? And don’t lie to me.”

Just the notion sent another shudder
convulsing through my veins.

Was she sleeping with him?

I choked over the thought. Nausea rolled in my
stomach. I was coming unhinged.

“Christian, come on, man, take a breath or
something. Settle down for a second, because I don’t have a single
clue what you’re talking about.”

“Logan…Kelsey’s dad,” I clarified through
hardened words. “Lizzie said Elizabeth has been over there, and I
went over to Elizabeth’s to talk to her earlier today and she
wasn’t home. She’s
always
home.”

Something like a smirk crested Matthew’s
mouth. “Well, it’s about fucking time. I take it back…don’t calm
down, because you’ve been sitting on your ass for far too long.
It’s about time you fought for her.”

Natalie approached and placed a gentle hand on
my back. “Why don’t we go sit on the couch?”

I didn’t resist, and I let her lead me around
into their family room. I sank down onto the couch and buried my
face in my hands.

Matthew plopped down in the recliner next to
the couch, sat hunched over with his hands clasped between his
knees.

Natalie settled beside me. Sorrow rolled from
her, washed over me in burdened waves. A supportive hand found my
knee. She squeezed it. “Tell us what’s going on.”

I raked my hands from my hair to my neck,
blowing out a weighted breath. “I don’t know…I just…” I cut my eye
to Natalie, looked at her in all honesty. Brown eyes, so much like
Elizabeth’s, blinked back at me. Emotion tightened my throat. I
could barely speak.

“I’ve been
waiting
for her, Nat.
Waiting for something to change, for
her
to make a change.”
I raised my face to the ceiling. “I never once thought she’d make a
change that didn’t include me. But this guy…he said something a
couple of weeks ago, and I just got this
feeling
.” My mouth
set in a grim line when I looked back at her. “Then on Monday,
Lizzie told me she and Elizabeth had gone over there for a
barbecue. Of course, to Lizzie, it was all in fun, but I know
something’s going on.”