If You Ask Me (5 page)

With Leslie Nielsen in
Chance of a Lifetime.

PHOTO BY ALICE S. HALL/MPTVIMAGES.COM

I
t’s always a joy to know your castmates.

I’ve known Carl Reiner for years. Lately, he’s been appearing on
Hot in Cleveland
as a guest star in a recurring role—my character’s boyfriend, no less.

Carl Reiner and Allen were in the Army together in World War II in the Pacific. I met Carl one night years later, when Allen had all the guys from his outfit over to our house. There was Mort Lindsey and Howie Morris and Harry David and Carl. No wives were invited. So I fixed a couple of big casseroles for the fellas and took the dogs upstairs to the bedroom. I wasn’t allowed downstairs—it was one of those guys’ nights out.

Carl recently told me, “I wouldn’t have a career without Captain Ludden.”

I had no idea what he was talking about, and said so.

Carl told me about this entertainment group Allen was in, called the Army Entertainment Section. Carl had written some material and stood up one night in front of the guys and read it.

Allen said, “You’ve got to do more of that.”

Maurice Evans was also in the outfit, so Allen got Maurice to take the material to a producer, and Carl was off and running. He continued to be a writer but also went on to become one of our great comedians. It took a Shakespearean actor and a game-show host to make it happen in the beginning, but Carl took it from there.

Today, every so often, Carl will say to me, “Wouldn’t Allen get a kick out of this if he were here—seeing us working together?”

I don’t tell Carl, but I think Allen
is
getting a kick out of it, because he’s never very far from me. Ever.

With Carl Reiner on the set of
Hot in Cleveland.

TV LAND/THE KOBAL COLLECTION

S
everal times throughout this opus, I mention how much I love this business I’m in. And I mean every word of it.

But for all the things I enjoy about it, if ever I’m asked if there’s something I
don’t
like, the answer is a resounding
Yes
.

Red-carpet events.

Don’t get me wrong. When I’m at home watching television, I love seeing who’s there and what they’re wearing. But when you’re the walkee, it can be an absolute nightmare.

In real life, you step out of the car and immediately you’re struck blind and deaf as you’re greeted by a line of photographers armed with flash cameras and microphone-wielding television reporters, three deep, all shouting at you.

Betty!

Betty!

Over here!

Betty, look here!

Look up, Betty!

Mrs. Ludden! (They know that will get my attention!)

With all the flashing lights and the noise, you tend to lose your balance. All of a sudden, you’re staggering and you’re sure people are thinking,
Oh, she’s had a few!

The lights are glaring and the noise is horrendous, but you try to be as polite as possible, because these aren’t villains, they’re just people trying to do their jobs.

Sometimes the function has somebody who takes you down the carpet. For instance, TV Land will send someone if the four of us are doing the event. But always, I also have Jeff walking behind me, at the edge of the media zone, off the red carpet. Riding shotgun, which I need.

Historically, premieres have always had these red-carpet events. But the process has taken on new proportions of late. Every event has a system of protocol, and the number of stars and reporters and photographers and media outlets just seems to grow and grow.

It feels like everyone’s there with a microphone. And I know a lot of them—we do interviews all through the year. So as you’re stumbling around, you’re trying to talk to all sorts of different people. Usually a representative from the project (whatever project it may be) guides you to various reporters along the way—likely, they mix and match us along the way, to be fair to all the outlets. But you can’t really hear what they’re saying, given all the noise, so you just keep talking and hope you’re making some kind of sense. It’s all seat-of-the-pants.

You can’t resent it—it’s a necessary evil to promote a project. It’s a hazard one just has to get over.

It’s not my favorite part of my job. Have you noticed?

I would rather go to the dentist for a root canal.

The TV Land folks threw me an eighty-ninth birthday party. Here I am with the girls from
Hot in Cleveland
.... The red carpet is a lot better with friends!

D DIPASUPIL/FILMMAGIC.COM

With Malin Akerman, Ryan Reynolds, Sandra Bullock, Anne Fletcher, and Mary Steenburgen on the set of
The Proposal
.

PHOTOFEST/WALT DISNEY PICTURES

D
oing movies is different but interesting.

One thing in particular struck me about being on the set of
The Proposal
—what a joy it was to work with Sandra Bullock.

Here’s this big movie star, and there wasn’t anything “movie star” about her at all. She was just as down-to–earth as she could be. We became great and dear friends. Still are. The same goes for Ryan Reynolds.

Anne Fletcher, the movie’s wonderful director, had been a choreographer originally. We all got relaxed and silly with one another, so she wouldn’t just walk onto the set—she’d do a ballet leap onto the set, saying, “The director is here!”

In one of the scenes in the movie, Sandra and I are dancing around a bonfire.

On that day of filming, we’d been working all day, but we had to finish that night, because we were moving locations the next day. It was three o’clock in the morning, and I had to sing this blinking Eskimo song in order to shoot the scene.

First I had to learn it. And Eskimo makes no sense. I don’t know how Eskimos communicate! But I learned it. God knows what I was really saying.

And then it came time to dance around the fire.

Anne just turned us loose—told us to do whatever we felt like doing. And Sandra’s such a good sport. So just about the time we started moving around ...

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

The rain started, and it kept getting harder and harder.

Now, we had to finish this scene! We were leaving the site the next day. So they put up a canvas on four big poles to keep us dry. But the rain continued—harder and harder.

I’ve said before I love my profession, and I do. At three o’clock in the morning in the rain, you’d better love it a
lot
.

With Sandra
—
a scene in
The Proposal
.

© 2009 TOUCHSTONE PICTURES/PHOTO BY KERRY HAYES/MPTVIMAGES.COM

F
or the Hallmark movie
The Lost Valentine
with Jennifer Love Hewitt, we shot in this pretty little house in Atlanta in a lovely neighborhood. Across the street was a low wall, and behind it was this big grassy lawn.

All the neighbors knew that I was working there, so they all brought their dogs.

We’d look across the street from the set, and they’d all be lined up—owners and dogs, sitting on the wall.

Between scenes, I’d go across the street to say hello and get to know all the dogs.

There was this young man, Mitch, hired to escort me around the set, who would go over with me. One day he came in and said, “Betty, there’s a Newfoundland out there.”

The way he tells it, at the word “Newfoundland,” I
shot
out of my chair like a bullet! Why not? I don’t get to smooch with a Newfie that often.

So I got my dog fix every day.

Now, that’s a happy set.

With Jennifer Love Hewitt on the set of the Hallmark movie
The Lost Valentine
.

HALLMARK/THE KOBAL COLLECTION

I
t is a real privilege to have been working in this business for so long, but there are a few built-in hazards—some of which can’t be avoided. Interviews, for example. There is no way to even estimate the number of them I have done over the years—we must be in the millions by now. This means I have answered the same questions, told the same anecdotes, wheezed on and on ad infinitum, again and again. The interviewers know the material better than I do, going in—and it’s tough to put a fresh spin on it.

A few years ago I was asked one of the standard questions for probably the umpteenth time: “Is there anything you haven’t done in your career that you would still like to do?”

Well, I had just seen Meryl Streep and Robert Redford in
Out of Africa
for the third time, so the answer was automatic: “Yes, Robert Redford.” And I was surprised to suddenly find it was true! Ever since, I have realized that that answer fits a variety of situations, and I have used it accordingly.