If You Could See What I See (27 page)

He was trouble, but not because he was Tay. Friendly, open, funny, Tay.

Tay smiled and said hello, introduced himself. He was about my age, had black, short, wavy hair and a wide smile. He was cheerful. Like a black Labrador. That’s how I thought of him. A cheerful black lab.

We chatted and he invited me to dinner. I declined. He grabbed a table in the bar, asked to buy me a drink, I said yes, I don’t know why, then he bought crab and shrimp appetizers. When we were talking, my grandma sent over two pieces of chocolate cake. Tay seemed surprised when they arrived.

I wasn’t. Chocolate cake is what my mother says women should eat before sex so they are “more moist, like melted chocolate, not dry like a desert.” I have no idea how or why she believes that.

So, through the fuzz of chocolate, crab, and shrimp, and more wine, we chatted. I tried to forget about Blake. My heart ached for Blake. He was the one I wanted to be there with, not Tay, although the black Lab was darling.

Fifteen minutes later Tory and Lacey came over and introduced themselves. Lacey said, “Well, aren’t you a handsome fellow,” and Tory glared at me, swirled her martini with her purple-painted nails, and said, “I thought you agreed not to compete, Meggie. Hello.” She nodded at Tay. “I’m her sister. She’s frigid and has a bad past. She also works all the time and has a stick up her butt. Part of it is that she’s a Leo. I’m a Pisces. Much better, more cerebral, seductive. When you want to move on, I’m here for you.”

I rolled my eyes.

They sat down with us. Grandma sat down, too.

Tay was eager to chat.

Bark, bark
.

 

It happened a half hour later.

I was dancing with Tay on the dance floor. I was truly shocked that I was dancing at all. I knew I could blame it on the alcohol, which had slipped through my body like liquid gold.

Lacey, Tory, and almost all of the employees were dancing, too, most of them with each other. The Petrelli sisters got down and rocked it. So did Lance and his wife, Maritza and her sisters, and the Latrouelle sisters—well, they brought down the house. Abigail proved she could, in her words, “bust a move and a roll and a cartwheel.” She was a little drunk, but funny.

Grandma was in the middle. Tory had gone into the bathroom to cry, and had come out with a blotchy face. I knew she was thinking of Scotty because she’d said, “Scotty is such a jerk, and I don’t want him anymore. He still hasn’t called me, and I was remembering how lucky lucky lucky I am to be rid of him.”

Tay was smiling at me, making me laugh, and told me I had the prettiest hair he’d ever seen. He wrapped his fingers around a curl.

I was thinking of Blake. I wanted Tay to be Blake. I squished my eyes shut and dropped my forehead to Tay’s shoulder. I was almost seeing Blake in my arms....

And then . . . strangely enough—
boom
—when I lifted my head, Blake came out of the mist wearing a gray suit and tie.

No, no mist, I corrected myself. He came out of the steam. No, no steam, I corrected myself again.

I shook my head.

He came out of the fuzziness.

Not that, either.

But there he was.

I was drunk. I had to be. Maybe it was the beer after the wine, Tory’s screwdriver, some sips of Grandma’s frilly drink . . .

I blinked.

Blake was walking toward me on the dance floor, and he was one ticked-off dude.

I looked up at Tay. “Do you see a blond giant walking toward us, ho ho ho?”

He nodded. “Yeah, he’s right there. Do you know him?”

“Hello, Meggie.”

Blake stood right in front of Tay and me. I stopped dancing, so did Tay, but did not drop my arms from around his neck. This was why Tay was trouble.

“Hello, chief. Hello. Are you here to arrest me?” I blinked, swayed. Even in my semidrunken state, a state I was rather embarrassed to be in, I could still feel the zinging between Blake and me.

Zing and zing.

“No, not yet, Meggie.”

“Why would you be arrested?” Tay asked. He grinned at me. “For being beautiful?”

I giggled. “I don’t think so. He doesn’t think I’m beautiful. I would need Kalani’s black magic for that.”

Tay’s eyes opened wide. “Then he’s blind. You are way beautiful.”

“Thank you.” I smiled at Tay. I wanted to smile at Blake, but he looked grim. Jaw set. Shoulders back. Tight face.

“Are you really the chief?” Tay asked, all friendly and black Lab-ish.
Bark bark!

“Yes, I am.”

Tay smiled even more broadly. Like I said, he’s a friendly sort. Good looking, too. Excellent teeth, wide smile.

“Congratulations, man,” Tay said, shaking his hand. “That’s awesome. You know, I’ve seen you on TV.”

Blake nodded, ever so slightly, acknowledging what he said but not allowing himself to be drawn into the conversation.

“Meggie, I’m going to drive you home.”

I laughed. Giggled. Laughed. Leaned against Tay, who wrapped his arms around me again. Blake was soooo rawly handsome. I wanted to go bounce on his body badly. “No. There’s a typhoon.”

“Yes,” Blake said with quiet, firm precision. “Let’s go.”

“No. I’m here with . . .” I waved my hand as a crush of dizziness inserted itself into my brain. “I’m here with my sisters and Grandma, and other people from work, and my grandma is going to dance on the bar and wiggle like a sewing machine.”

Blake raised his eyebrow. “Dance on the bar?”

“Yes. She is completing her . . . what is it called . . . aha! Her Bust Out and Shake It Adventure Club list.”

“What do you mean her Bust Out and Shake It Adventure Club list?”

“Her list is all the things she wants to do before she dies and goes back to Ireland.”

“Is she dying?”

“No. Not at all. She’s healthy as a leprechaun sliding down a rainbow can be. But she’s in her eighties. Not young anymore, so she can’t fly on the back of an owl.” I stopped. Why was I talking about that magical story that was so grossly untrue? “At least, her body isn’t young. Her mind is. Her spirit inside is flying around from Ireland and making me go with her to do all these Irish things that have to get done. She doesn’t have young . . .” I could not keep track of my thoughts. “She does not have young
toes.
” I blinked to clear my vision. “She does not have young intestines.”

Blake looked intimidating and angry. I swayed.

“She doesn’t have young toes?” Tay laughed, tightening his arms around me. “That’s a great way of putting it. She’s not old, but she doesn’t have young toes!”

“No young toes. She’s not like you, Blake.” I smiled at him, though I could feel his anger coming at my drunkenness in waves. “You’re handsome. She’s not handsome. She’s beautiful. My grandma—” I paused and took a breath, feeling emotional all of a sudden. “She’s truly beautiful. I love her.” I pulled out of Tay’s arms and hugged Blake. I felt his arms around my back, secure and warm. “I love my grandma,” I whispered in his ear. “I love my grandma.”

“Aw!” Tay said behind me, “That’s so nice! I love my grandma, too.”

I pulled back and stared into the gray-blue fury of Blake’s eyes. “Don’t you love your grandma?”

“Yes, I did. But you are drunk and I want you to come with me and I will take you home.”

“Oh, no. You won’t take me to your home,” I told him, waving a finger. “You will take me to my home. You have already told me I can’t go to your home and see your bedsheets.”

“That’s not what I said.”

“Yep.” I pulled out of his arms, though he resisted and I had to push his arms away. Tay pulled me back in. He’s fun. He’s full of life and spirit. He is so perfect for someone else. “You don’t need to drive me, I’m with . . .” I paused and tried to envision who I was with. “I am with a black Labrador.”

“A black Lab!” Tay exclaimed, happy. “I had a black Lab named Spaghetti when I was a kid, and I loved him. I miss that dog.”

“You’re kind of a black Lab sort of man and this . . .” I pointed at Blake, whose glare could fillet a shark. “This man is more of a Doberman.” The bar was spinning. Yuck.

I smiled at Tay, and he hugged me closer, then said to Blake, “Good to meet you, man,” which was like saying, “Shove off, buddy, I’m with this woman,” and it about set Blake on fire, he was so mad. Even through my inebriation I could see that.

“Let’s go, Meggie,” Blake said. “Do you even know this guy?”

“Nope. But I’m not going with you.”

“It’s time for you to go.”

“Who are you here with, Blake?” I asked. “A golden retriever?”

“I was having dinner with the mayor and a woman from city council.”

“Not with your girlfriend?” The bar spun again. Double yuck.

He was not pleased. “I don’t have a girlfriend, as you know.”

All three of us turned at the drumroll, and a “Ladies and Gentleman” call went out by the deejay.

“Folks, this is Regan O’Rourke. She is eighty-something years old and she wants to dance on a bar. She says it’s now or never.”

Gracefully, carefully, with help from Lance and Eric, Grandma climbed on top of the bar, to wild applause, in her turquoise dress and high heels. She signaled for a microphone, and obediently the deejay handed it to her.

“Greetings and good evening. I have written a list called my Bust Out and Shake It Adventure Club list. Basically I’m checking things off that I always wanted to do but didn’t do in my youth. I always wanted to dance on a bar when I was younger, but I was too busy working.” Her Irish brogue was lilting, lovely. “I can’t even dance. Why? Same reason. When I was young and should have been dancing, I was working. So tonight’s the night. I need three people up here to help me—my granddaughters, Tory, Meggie, and Lacey.”

“That’s your grandma?” the black Lab gushed.

“Yes, that is!” I put both hands up in the air and clapped. “The Irishman’s wife!”

Tay stared at her, totally admiring. “She is absolutely awesome. Awesome!”

I was grabbed by Abigail, Tory, and Lacey. The black Lab gave me a push, laughing. I did not look at the huggable Doberman.

Grandma signaled the drummer, the drummer pounded out the beat, the band joined him, and Grandma danced, strutting, and wiggling up and down the long bar as people threw their hands in the air and clapped and hooted.

I hadn’t danced in many miserable years. But I was tipsy and irrationally furious at Blake for rejecting me, so when Grandma held her arms out I climbed up and danced, along with Tory, who knew how to shake it.

I danced in my burgundy dress that dropped halfway down my thighs, with the low-cut bodice, and in high heels, which I hadn’t worn in years. Tory did a shimmy thing up there—she has rhythm in her soul—and Lacey bobbed up and down, carefully, in one place, no heels, three people standing below to catch her, just in case.

Grandma’s smile lit up that whole room. At the end, with a dramatic drumroll, the bass ear-splitting, applause thunderous, Grandma hugged me close. “That’s my girl,” she said. “You’re coming back to life. Welcome aboard, and I love you.”

Tory said, “There’s hope yet, Meggie. You still know how to dance.”

When I climbed down, the black Lab bounced up and spun me around. “I think I want to marry you!”
Bark bark!

Over his shoulder, as I was being swung, I saw the Doberman. He may have liked the dance, I don’t know, but for sure he did not like the black Lab. Too bad for him.

Unfortunately I didn’t want to marry a friendly black Lab.

I didn’t want to marry anyone, but if I were forced by a gun-wielding, six-legged scorpion from a sci-fi movie to marry someone, I would definitely pick the Doberman.

The Doberman turned and left.

 

I woke up naked on my leather couch Saturday morning with a headache the size of Arkansas.

I groaned, then dragged my sorry butt up and poured myself tomato juice. Next I dipped three marshmallows into orange juice and ate them. After that I ate peanut butter straight from the jar. Jeepers hissed at me from upstairs.

I wrapped myself in my pink, bedraggled draggy robe, then pulled on one blue wool sock and one red sock and headed out to my deck, where I sat in the blue Adirondack chair and buried my head in my hands. I was glad Blake couldn’t see me from his house. Pop Pop climbed on my lap and licked my cheek as the whole night came flooding back.

After the bar-dancing debacle Tay said, “Will you come home with me later, Meggie. Please?”

He had a loose and easy smile, with dimples on the sides. He had fun and friendly eyes. He would be fun and friendly in bed. He would allow me to escape for a while. I could forget. I could have sex. I was dying for sex. I was dying to be held. I was dying to stroke and straddle a handsome man.

But Tay wasn’t the man I wanted to stroke or straddle.

I could not sleep with Tay with Blake zooming around in my head.

I also had Aaron in my head, too.

That would have made four people in one bed: Tay, Aaron, Blake, and me.

I am not kinky in bed at all, and four is way too many.

“Tay, I’m sorry . . .” I started. “No.”

“How about dinner tomorrow night?” He was hopeful.

“No.”

“Lunch?” Losing hope.

“No.”

“Any chance for coffee?” His smile was definitely dimming.

“No, I’m sorry.”

“Why?” Hope gone.

I hugged him, said I wasn’t interested in dating. The black Lab was sad.

I remembered Blake’s eyes boring into mine. He had not liked seeing me tipsy. He had not liked seeing me with Tay.

I felt my temper shoot on up.

Who the hell did he think he was to be mad at me?

I had asked him if he wanted to sleep with me, and he’d said no.

So what claim did he have on me if I was inebriated and clinging to a black Lab?