Illumine Her (13 page)

Alana sighed heavily. “I know. My family is going to freak out over this.”

She closed her eyes, and he squeezed her hand. “We’ll deal with that later. One step at a time, alright?”

Alana could not believe that one night of euphoria had so quickly turned into a nightmare. Did she ask for this? Was she at fault for acting out defiantly against her brother? No, of course not, she reasoned with herself. No one could have seen this happen, not even her brother. A wash of emotions swept over her, engulfing and leaving her experiencing a vulnerability that scared her to her core. Part of her was tempted to call the men back, convinced that her attacker was scared enough as it was and not to stir up any more attention. The other part, however—the part that was still hurting from her father’s death—was winning the mental battle. It argued that she couldn’t allow this incident to slide, that she was not to blame. She did what she could to defend herself, and now he had to face the consequences of his actions.
Think about your father. Do this for him
, her mind pushed.

This could be his vengeance.

Realization smacked her hard, and she sucked in a breath. Yes, this could be her revenge. By getting back at one drunken killer through another drunken assaulter, she would be able to avenge her father’s death. Alana’s heart rate picked up at the significance of it. She would do this for him.

“Alana, I’m sorry,” Manu said with a grim expression. “This is my fault. I should never have left your side.” His face was remorseful, his features contorted in guilt. Alana felt her heart tug.

“Hey,” she said and faced him. “I didn’t expect you to babysit me. Besides, I did okay. I got a good punch in there.”

That elicited a small smile from him. “I’m sorry I missed that.”

She looked away and stood. “Let’s go,” she said tiredly. “The sooner this night is over, the better.”

They said goodbye to Ruby, and Alana was led to the door where a blast of salty air slapped harsh reality into her. She was going down to the police station. She was going to have to face him. Tell her side of the story. Relive it all.
For your father
, she reminded herself. Fueled with determination, she allowed Manu to support her back as they exited the house.

“I should have brought that machete,” Alana thought she heard him mutter fiercely under his breath, but she was too wrapped up in her plan to give it any notice.

Chapter 10

“A
re you alright?” Manu asked as they parked near the police station. He shifted so he was facing her, his face lined with concern.

Alana took a deep breath and nodded. “I will be once we get this thing over with.” Getting out of the truck, she smoothed down her dress and made her way inside.

“I’m going to call David,” Manu said and produced his phone from his pocket.

Alana cringed on the inside. “Let me talk to him.”

Twenty minutes later Uncle Solo and her brother strode in. Alana was in the midst of being questioned by an officer who appeared to be at the end of his shift. His heavy arms sagged over the desk, and his movements were slow and lazy as he recorded the events of the evening. His face lacked emotion and he kept his eyes averted, only nodding now and then in acknowledgment.

“Alana, we take assault very seriously,” he said tiredly. “If you want to go ahead with this charge, you have to be absolutely sure you want to do this. Since he did not rape you, I would encourage you to think hard about this. What we can do in the meantime is take your statement and that alone will be a permanent stain on his record for life.”

It was there Alana learned her attacker was a renowned businessman in the community. The escort to the police station and threatening statement was humiliation enough, and his family begged for the assault charge to be dropped. She knew news traveled fast on a small island, and if the public got wind of his misdemeanor, he would be ruined. The gossip alone was going to cast a negative light on him, his marriage, his family, and his business.

“He didn’t hurt her! He didn’t touch her!” his wife shouted at the police officers. She was hysterical and shot tearful glares towards Alana. Addressing her she threatened, “If you do this, you will regret it!”

She swore aloud and cried, her hands pulling roughly at her hair and dress, anger spilling and lashing out towards her husband. Her stricken face was filled with the fierce passion of a woman who just found out what her husband had done—torn between defending him and striking him across the face. The air in the room was charged with tense rage and threats mirroring the flickering florescent lights above.

“Let this go, Lana,” Uncle Solo said quietly. Never one who liked confrontations, he pressed on. “Thankfully, you’re okay, and you’ve made your point and shaken him up enough...” he reached for her shoulder and tapped it to emphasize his words “...you don’t want to drag this out to the courts—it will take months and will be costly. Let’s just forgive and forget, yes? You don’t want to bring this kind of attention to yourself and our family. I’m sure he’s learned his lesson now that he has been shamed in front of his wife and family. His pride has been hurt, and in this country that is the worst kind of punishment.”

Alana listened numbly as he droned on. She was a tangled mess of confusion inside, a tempest churning to and fro, torn between the respect she had for her uncle and loyalty towards her father. Her father, who was killed by a drunk and could do nothing to defend himself. Her father, whose life had been cut short by someone’s careless act. She knew it was a long shot connecting the two incidents, but she couldn’t help it. After all of the heartache and nightmares, she needed to take back control, and this was an opportunity to do just that.

“Your sister’s wedding is coming up. Let’s not darken the mood and bring more stress to your mother. He came on to you, but he didn’t go further, thank God.” He urged her to see and understand from his perspective that his act was small in comparison to what could have been and was not worth the added pain a trial would put her and her family through.

Alana looked up to her brother’s face for direction. He stood still, his face hard while the muscle in his jaw clenched tensely. His silence spoke volumes, confusion matching her own but implying she should do as their uncle suggested. For all his pomp and flair about protecting her all her life, he nodded his head.

“Lana, there’s nothing more I’d rather do than to beat that bastard to a pulp, but Uncle Solo is right,” he said.

Alana felt like she had been slapped across the face. She gaped at him in shock. “And if he had gone further? Would you both be standing here in front of me telling me to do the same? Let it go?” she asked angrily. She couldn’t believe what they were both encouraging her to do but focused all her hostility towards her brother.

“Of course not, Alana,” he responded fiercely. “We would hire the best lawyer and do everything we could to put him away. But his being here and that statement is enough to do damage to him,” he said forcefully, pointing in the direction of her attacker.

Alana stared at her brother as if he had attacked her himself. She stood to look him in the eye when she spoke, showing him no respect.

She shook her head. “I don’t believe you, David. I can’t believe what you’re trying to get me to do.” Her throat tightened with each word. “You want me to just walk away? To just forgive and forget, like what we did to that drunk driver?” She swiped at her eyes, willing the tears to stay away. She felt as if a pile of bricks were piling on her chest and she couldn’t breathe under the weight. “This is not right! What he did was not right,” she hissed. David stepped back with a grim line on his mouth as she continued. “You cannot ask me to let this go. You can’t!”

Her brother’s face hardened. “Alana, that drunk driver and this… Don’t mix the two up. You have to let what happened to Dad go.”

Alana flinched and her blood burned with fury. “I will not let that go!” she cried, and her brother stepped closer. “Just because the
ifoga
was carried out doesn’t mean I forgive him!”

“Stop this,” he said in a low voice that was laced with contained anger. “Don’t do this.”

Alana stepped back and glared at him. “I hate you,” she choked, the words making him reel back. Her heart twisted at the look on his face but she continued. “For someone who claims to be the big alpha in this family, you’re all talk but you have no idea. No idea whatsoever. You want me to drop the charge? I’ll drop it. But I hate you,
hate you
for making me do it.”

Without looking at either of them, she pushed away from her uncle and brother, past Manu and the gawking police officers and her attacker’s family, and ran into the midnight blackness outside. She hurt deeply and the emotion intensified as she felt betrayed by those who claimed to love and protect her. She located her brother’s truck and settled inside, slamming the door with enough force to rattle the windows.

***

Alana ignored her brother on the drive home. Staring out at the moths flying towards the windshield, she kept quiet. Reaching the house, she jumped out and almost tripped from the slowly moving vehicle in a race to the front door.

“Alana!” she heard her brother bellow out.

Trying the doorknob, it was locked. “Mama!” she called out.

The truck’s engine turned off, and David’s footsteps bounded up the stairs. “She’s not home.”

She swung around. “Where is she?”

“I have to pick her up from choir practice.”

Alana’s heart sunk. “And Malia?”

“She’s at Aunty Malae’s.”

Alone. She was going to be alone. Alana’s face contorted with emotion and her chin trembled.
Don’t cry. You will not cry
. “I’m going to bed,” she said shakily and fished her keys out of her purse.

Turning it in the lock, she shoved the door open and stepped in.

“Alana—” She cut off her brother’s voice when she shut it behind her.

She could hear the engine rev to life as she chucked her shoes off and walked barefoot down the hall to the bathroom. Flicking on the light switch, she grabbed the hem of her dress, tore it off her body, and dropped it to the floor. With quivering fingers, she unclasped her bra and let it slip from her shoulders and arms. Standing in front of the mirror, she gazed at her face.

The makeup around her eyes was smudged and blackened. Grabbing a wash cloth, she rinsed it under cold water and rubbed her face until it was sore. She pulled the elastic band from her hair and let her long locks fall down her back. Taking off her panties, she stepped into the shower and turned on the water. Since her house didn’t have hot water, she would often suck in her breath until she adjusted to the temperature. Tonight she was oblivious to it, her body numb.

Clutching the soap, she rubbed it along one arm until it reached her chest. She hissed from the contact. Glancing down at her left breast, she paused and the soap slipped from her fingers and skidded on the tiles. Four dark bruises marked her skin where his hand had touched. The vessels around her neck squeezed around her throat until it hurt. Pinching her eyes shut, she let her fingers graze over the bruises. God, it was painful! Inhaling a sharp breath, her shoulders slumped and she tipped her head under the stream of cold water, letting it wash over her. Her long hair fell forward and obscured her view. Mentally, she knew she couldn’t hide.
This won’t wash away your pain
, she thought sadly. She was blanketed in her thick curls and her short breaths echoed back to her.
Don’t cry. You will not cry
.

Forgetting the shampoo, she turned off the tap and wrapped herself in a towel. Water trickled down her back and left drips along the floor to her darkened room. The wind from the valley raised goose bumps along her arms, and she shut the louvers and closed the curtains. Dressing quickly in an oversized T-shirt and
lavalava
, she slipped under the mosquito net and stared beyond its transparent material.
You will not cry, Alana
, she willed herself.

Shutting her eyes to the world, she couldn’t escape. The blackness behind her eyelids only enhanced her other senses. The cold. Loneliness. Confusion. What could she do now? She was helpless, powerless to bring justice and to avenge her father’s death. She was slipping, her control out of her reach. Why her? Why? The pain sunk deep beneath her skin and mixed together with her blood. Rolling onto her side, she clutched the sheet over her shoulders and tried to forget.