In Hiding: A Survivors Journal of the Great Outbreak (23 page)

Leaving
the building wasn’t going to be easy and all of us knew that. First thing first
was we needed to find the guns if we had any chance of making it. So we had to
search or wait for Paul to regain consciousness and hope that he’d be willing to
tell us. In the end we chose to wait while we discussed the other issues at
hand like what to do with Paul and how to get out of the building and make it
to a vehicle safely. I remember looking at the front doors and pointing at the
wall of Zeds that were blocking the entranceway and suggested that we start by
coming up with a way to get past that.

There
must have been hundreds of them out there. Even worse there was a huge
concentration of them at every door around the store. To me that was the first obstacle
that we needed to get through and if we couldn’t figure out a way to get past
that planning the rest of the trip was a moot point. We thought about using the
RC truck again mostly because it had worked before and there was a chance that
it could work again. It was an option but during our discussions we found a few
flaws in trying something like that for a second time. We thought about scaling
down the side of the building from the roof in the areas where their numbers
were thin. But the whole idea was too complicated to work.

Most
distractions involved someone being alone on the roof either controlling the RC
truck or doing something else while the others made it to one of the cars and
then waited for them to return and pick them up. Well I don’t need to tell you
that nobody was interested in volunteering to be the one left behind. Trust was
fleeting and there wasn’t a person there that was willing to take that kind of
a chance. Besides, we were going to need everyone to make it to one of those vehicles.

Then
Adam suggested something that shocked us all. He hinted that we could sacrifice
Paul as a distraction while the rest of us made a break for one of the cars. At
first we all pretended to be disgusted by his idea. But in reality I think we
were all just curious as to how it could work. I was conflicted about the
entire idea. I mean Paul and I had been somewhat close ever since I got over
him initially pointing that gun at me. But if he had killed Anne, if he had
been the one to do it, there was no way we could bring him with us. Maybe it
made sense to sacrifice him if it meant that we could all get out of here in
one piece.

I
could almost see how it could work, how we could use him to draw the Zeds to
one area while we went out a different way. I convinced myself that it could
work and for the first time I actually believed we had a chance to make it out.
The only problem was that I hadn’t convinced myself that it was the right thing
to do.

At
some point in the middle of our conversation Paul regained consciousness and as
you can imagine he wasn’t exactly willing to cooperate after hearing what we
had planned on doing with him. He flat out refused to tell us where the guns
were hidden and denied anything to do with Anne’s death. He knew the guns were his
only leverage and he knew if we had to waste time looking for them, well that
meant we couldn’t leave, we couldn’t sacrifice him, and more time for him try
and convince us that he was innocent.

Either
way, there was no point in negotiating with him after that. If we were going to
find the guns we were going to have to find them ourselves. We had eliminated a
few places where we knew the guns couldn’t be. I knew they weren’t on the roof
because I had been up there and chances were he couldn’t have moved them up
there by himself anyway without one of us seeing him. So we decided that we
would search the sales floor and the back room first.

Our
list of things we needed to do had grown. We needed to come up with a plan, we
needed to gather supplies, we needed to decide on a vehicle and of course we
needed to find the guns. Coming up with the plan hit an early stumbling block
as we debated whether or not we could live with ourselves if we actually used
Paul as bait. I found it surprising how little resistance there was to letting
Paul die. Especially considering the horrible death that we were condemning him
too. I protested only a little realizing that if I put up too much of a fight
there was a chance I could find myself on the wrong side of the mob.

Once
we had made that decision, we had to work out the rest of the details of our
escape plan. We were going to tie up Paul and leave him at the front of the
store. We would position him just far enough inside that the Zeds could still
see him but far enough in that it would draw a large percentage of them inside.
We were going to load up all the supplies that we were going to take with us in
the garage before hand so that we would be ready to go once the Zeds were
inside. Everyone in the group would hide in the garage except for one person
who would have to unlock the front doors and then run as fast as humanly
possible to meet them there.

Luckily
Zeds were slow and hopefully once they saw Paul sitting there they wouldn’t
follow the runner back to the garage. We figured we would have to wait about
twenty minutes or so for most of the horde to push their way inside the
building and after that we would run out the garage door for my SUV. It may not
have been the closest vehicle but at least we had the keys. We knew it was
going to be a tight fit, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t like we had any other
options.

If
everything worked out, we were hoping that most of the Zeds in the parking lot
would keep heading for the building and the newly open doors which we hoped
would limit the amount of them that we would have to deal with to get to my
car. That was why we still needed the guns. We were smart enough to know that
not all the Zeds would leave the area so we needed to be prepared just in case.
Once we were out of the store well we were just going to make it up as we went
along. There was no telling what we would encounter as we made our way across
the country. So there was no real need to plan any of it out.

With
everything decided upon and finding the guns the only thing keeping us there,
we chose to leave the next morning. We figured that would give us enough time
to find the weapons, pack up and get some rest. So Derrick and I started
packing up supplies, bottled water, canned food, ammunition, flash lights and
whatever essentials we felt we needed. We tried to pack light, limiting the
weight of each bag that we would need to carry. It was important that we be
able to move quickly.

While
the two of us were packing up the others searched every square inch of the
building trying to find the guns that Paul had hidden. I shared my concerns
with Derrick once again, trying to remind him how bad it was out there and how
bad I thought it could be.

What
if the Navy wasn’t there anymore?

What
if all the highways were blocked?

What
if we couldn’t find gas anywhere?

What
if we encountered a giant horde of Zeds?

I
asked him several questions most of which he had no answer for. I tried to
remind him of what we had here and how we could make it in the store if we
really committed to it. But there was no convincing Derrick. He had been out
there and he knew how bad it was, so there was no scaring him with horror
stories of what I had seen on the news. He had lived it. He simply thought that
if we stayed we would die eventually anyway and if there was a chance that we
could reconnect with society in anyway it was worth trying no matter how
dangerous it was.

We
may have disagreed about what the best course of action was, but I was only one
man with one opinion and the rest of the others were sold on heading east.
While we were packing and talking the others were busy coming up empty in their
search for the guns. Paul still refused to tell anybody anything and was trying
to negotiate his freedom by offering up the information once he had been
released. That wasn’t getting anybody anywhere. Once everything was packed I helped
them in their search and had about as much luck as the others. That was when I
decided to try a different approach. I went and talked to Paul alone.

I
never promised him that I would let him go. I didn’t play any games with him. I
came right out and asked him where they were. I tried to remind him that I had
always been there for him and that we had been friends and that I hated how
everything had happened. But he was quick to mention that I had promised to
have his back if something happened and in his eyes I had obviously let him
down in that regard. My only argument for that was that he had murdered someone
and that was why he was in the predicament he was in.

He
continued to deny it. He tried to feed me a bunch of bull hoping that I might
actually believe him and try and convince the others that he was innocent. But
then sometime in the middle of his pleas he paused for about a minute or two
and then looked right at me and told me that he had done it.

He
tried to tell me that it was in self-defense and that she was going to leave
and open the doors and how that would have compromised the security of the
building. He told me she was going to put all of our lives at risk. He told me
that he was desperate and didn’t know what else to do. He seemed to be all over
the place as he tried to justify his actions to me and I think he finally
realized how much trouble he was actually in. He pleaded with me not to let the
others leave him to die. He didn’t want to go out that way.

It
was a sad sight to behold. Watching a man plead for his life like that. I tried
to tell him that he could start making amends by telling me where the guns
were. But still after all of that he refused. He knew that offering up the
location of the guns wouldn’t change his fate. But I guess he hoped that if we
were still looking, it would at least keep him alive just a little bit longer.

We
said our goodbyes before I left him sitting there, tied up in that chair. I
knew if we were going to leave the next morning there were still a few things
that I needed to take care of.

Generally
before a big day they say it’s important to get a good nights sleep. It makes
sense. You would think that it’s important to be well rested before an event or
a trip but it usually never works out that way. The excitement tends to keep
you awake and then your mind starts racing which keeps you from ever getting
the rest you need. We were no different. We searched long into the night for
the guns before we found them. We had done away with the watch on the roof and
instead replaced that with someone keeping an eye on Paul at all times. We
tried to take quick naps throughout the night in between searching and last
minute preparations.

We
double checked supplies, went over the plan again to make sure that everyone
knew what they were supposed to do. We needed to make sure there were no
screw-ups because we were only going to get one shot at it. One mistake and it
was all over. We would be done for.

I
spent the early morning hours on the roof watching the sunrise. I spent some
time looking for Hal, hoping in a strange way to say goodbye. But he was gone.
Lost in a crowd of walking disease and just another monster in a world that was
filled with them. Anything special about him was gone. I looked out at all the
familiar sights that I had spent so much time looking at and the surrounding
area that I had become all too familiar with. Then I went and checked the bags
one last time, made sure the guns were still loaded with Jacob and took over
for Amy for the last shift of guarding Paul before we left.

At
first we didn’t speak for the better part of ten minutes. But eventually we
started to reminisce about everything we had been through and that first day
that seemed so long ago. We talked about all the terrible things that we had
witnessed and done and how sorry we were for some of them. He almost shed a
tear when he spoke about that little boy and what he had to do that day. I
actually saw a more human side of Paul in those early morning hours. It was the
side of him that I wanted to remember.

I
met the others in the back room to grab everything we needed and got ready to
start moving it into the garage. We made sure that everyone had a gun and or a
camping hatchet for protection. We were defiantly going to need them once we
got out into the parking lot. Derrick quickly showed Sandy and Adam how to use
the weapons they had while Jacob and Amy inspected their weapons to make sure
they were ready to go. We double-checked all of the supplies, I made sure that
I had the keys safely in my pocket and remember feeling as nervous as I ever
had in my entire life.

I
remember looking around at the others in the group and seeing that same nervous
look on their faces. Derrick, Jacob, Amy, Shannon, Sandy, Cody, Adam and Kerri.
Each and every one of them looked scared and when Cody asked if we were all
ready to go I don’t think that anyone actually answered him. But we started
moving anyway, led by Derrick armed with Paul’s handgun and a small hatchet, we
followed. I followed. Right out onto the sales floor with a shotgun in my hand
heading to what I only hoped would be a better place. But none of us could have
been prepared for what we found.

The
amount of noise coming from inside the building immediately told me that
something had gone wrong. I looked around at the others and saw that they were
all just as confused by what was happening as I was. We started walking toward
the front of the store to inspect what was making the sounds but we should have
known better. The closer we got the louder the noise became. That was when we
saw just how wrong everything had gone.

There
was a woman standing there just pushing her way through a rack of men’s shirts
at the back of the clothing department. Her face was grey, her flesh scratched
to shreds and her clothes ripped and bloodied. Panic started to set in and
shouts of disbelief came from almost everyone. Derrick raised the handgun, took
about ten steps forward and fired a round into her forehead at close range. As
her corpse collapsed to the ground I finally realized what was behind her. The
nightmare that had plagued me every night had come true.

There
were dozens of them pushing there way through the store, through the clothing
departments, down the aisles they came and they were heading right for us. The
entire front of the store appeared to be full of them. The front doors had been
opened and they had poured into the building just like we had imagined they
would. They were everywhere knocking down racks of clothing and shelving units
as made their way towards us. Our plan had prematurely been put into action and
we weren’t prepared.

I
stood there paralyzed with fear hoping that I would wake up and that it was all
just another one of my nightmares. They were coming through the doorway wave
after wave. That was when Jacob grabbed me by the shoulder and told me to run.
We needed to move, we needed to get to the garage. If we could make it there we
still had a chance. Cody raised the shotgun that he was carrying and took aim
at a Zed that was getting close. But Derrick stopped him from shooting yelling
something about conserving ammunition. Besides he wanted us to get moving, we
needed to run.

Derrick
was pushing us all towards the garage, trying to get us running. I reached out
and grabbed a hold of Kerri’s wrist trying to get her attention. I could see
that she had frozen up and that she had turned pale. Finally when she looked
back at me she snapped out of it. I pulled her to get her moving and together
we started to run for the garage. All of us tried to stick together as we moved
down the long aisle that led to the far corner of the building. We tried to
move as fast as we could but we could see that those damn things were
everywhere.

I
couldn’t believe how many of them had made it inside. Just as Adam looked back
to make sure that everyone was still with us a zombie dressed in a hospital
gown reached out and grabbed a hold of him by the shirt. Adam almost fell to
the ground as the grip stopped him dead in his tracks. I was right behind him
so I stepped up and stuck the Zed in the face with my gun, knocking him back
and away from Adam. I helped him up and we continued to run.

As
we ran past the aisles I could see them making their way towards the back of
the store. They were in every aisle, they were around every corner and they
were coming in droves. Some of them were following us, some were just roaming
as those behind them pushed them forward and others were simply being guided by
the layout of the store. Finally we were close enough to the door to see that
the path was clear and I ran just a little faster hoping that our plan still
had a chance to work.

Shannon
was the first one to reach the door that led into the garage. But when she
tried to open it the door wouldn’t budge. She started screaming about it being
locked or stuck so Derrick pushed his way through us and gave it a try. He
pulled and pulled but the door wouldn’t open. He tried to smash the glass
window in the middle of the door with the hatchet but that glass was
shatterproof. He was getting nowhere and that meant that we were stuck. I heard
a gunshot come from just behind me. I turned around to see Cody shooting a Zed
that was wearing a track suit and that was missing his left arm. He must have
snuck up on us but Cody put him down quickly.

I
looked around and could see that we were running out of time. Cody fired
another shot at a zombie that was getting a little too close for comfort but
with every shot fired I knew that we were drawing more attention then we needed
too. I couldn’t understand why the door wouldn’t open. By that time Derrick and
Adam were both kicking the door in an act of desperation. It didn’t make sense,
the lock was on our side and nobody had locked that door since we had opened it
to let Scott out. But that was when I thought I heard something through the
terrible sounds of the Zeds and shouting. Then I heard it again a little more
clearly that time and immediately I knew what it was. It was Paul on the other side
of that door and he was mocking us.

He
thanked us for such a wonderful plan and told us how well it appeared to be
working. He had broken the lock and started shouting something about what he
had done to the door. He had opened the door just like we had planned. He ran
and hid in the garage just like we had planned. Only he had turned our plan
against us and used us as the bait to draw the zombies into the store while he
waited it out in the garage.

Kerri
and Shannon were pleading with him to open the door, to let us in, to save us.
I knew that it was pointless. He wasn’t going to open that door because I knew
if I were in his position there was no way that I would have opened the door.
After all we were going to leave him here to die. Now that the tables had been
turned there was no chance in hell that he was going to show us any kind of
mercy.

Derrick
fired a shot at the lock on the door and I guess that doesn’t work as well as
it does in the movies. It accomplished nothing and we were getting close to
being surrounded. I heard two more shots come from the back of the group. Cody
and Jacob were trying to hold off a small group of Zeds that were headed right
for us. There were too many of them and they were coming from almost every
direction. If we didn’t move quickly we were going to be trapped.

Cody
started shouting at all of us that we needed to move. I agreed. Shannon pointed
to the far side of the building. Her idea was that if we made it to the far
side there might be a chance that the front would clear up as the horde pushed
toward where we were and not where we were going. For that to work I knew that
we couldn’t use the guns. We would have to rely on the hatchets for protection
as we pushed our way across the back of the store.

Derrick
stepped up and drove his hatchet into an obese zombie and kicked its corpse out
of the way as it fell to the ground. That was just enough to clear a path for
us and we ran through the opening and out into the main aisle that led to the
far corner. It was a straight shot down one long and wide aisle that had
displays of everything from paper towels to movies that lined the middle.

Two
more Zeds appeared at the back of the closest aisle that ran perpendicular to
the aisle we were running down. Derrick and Cody charged them and after a few
quick blows from the hatchets the Zeds were on the ground and we were moving
on. I never got used to zombies in such close quarters. It was absolutely
terrifying being that close to them, knowing what they could do and how all it
took was just one bite and you were dead.

We
were running as fast as we could trying to stay as quiet as possible to avoid
drawing any attention to ourselves. As we ran past a rack of DVDs I thought I
saw something out of the corner of my eye. I turned to look back just in time
to see a young girl in a filthy little dress that was probably adorable at one
point dive out from behind the rack of movies and into Shannon’s legs. I tried
to scream to warn her but by the time the words came out, the girl had already
knocked her to the ground.

The
girl was no older then six, her curly blonde hair was blood stained and covered
only half of her head. The other half was missing everything including her
scalp. The flesh where her cheek used to be was gone she was covered in dirt
and blood from head to toe. Shannon had tripped and landed on her stomach but
she seemed to be okay. She turned onto her back just in time to see the little
Zed try and climb on top of her chest. Jacob grabbed the girl by the back of
her dress, picked her up and threw her off to the side. But she got up fairly
quickly and started heading for Sandy who was the closest to her. Cody stepped
up and put his hatchet into the side of her head and that was the end of that
terrifying encounter.

We
moved on. I was starting to doubt that we had any chance of surviving. I looked
to my right and could see that there were dozens of them still coming up
through the clothing departments and there were dozens more that were still
filing into the store from outside. That was when I turned around and ran right
into Amy’s back. I had been so busy looking down the aisles that I hadn’t
noticed that the others had stopped running. I almost knocked her over but
luckily Jacob was standing right beside her and was able to grab her before she
hit the ground. The reason we had stopped was a behemoth of a Zed that had
appeared in our path and it was blocking our way to the corner. He must have
been six-foot four or five and probably weighed about at least three hundred
pounds. He was absolutely disgusting.

To
get around him meant running down one of the narrow aisles and most of those
were filled with zombies. It would have been like running through a gauntlet
with little chance of survival. We couldn’t go back towards the garage that
entire area was filled with Zeds and some of them were already starting to
follow us. We were screwed.

He
seemed almost too big to use the hatchets on safely. His giant stomach and his
height would make it incredibly dangerous to even try to get that close to him.
So Derrick went with the only option that he believed we had left. He took a
few steps closer, aimed, and fired a round through the head of that giant but
it didn’t fall at first. For a moment I actually couldn’t believe what I was
looking at. But then just before Derrick fired his gun a second time the large
mountain of a zombie collapsed to the ground. We maneuvered around the corpse
and started to run again trying to create some space between us the group of
Zeds that were closing in on us from behind us.