In the Heart of the Highlander (21 page)

“I never meant to lie to you. Well, of course I did, but I didn’t expect to
not
want to lie to you. To lie
with
you, as it were.”

“You’re a wordsmith, too.” He reached for his trousers.

“W-what are you doing?”

“Getting dressed. I suggest you do the same.”

Mary’s lip quivered. “You mean you won’t finish what we started?”

“I don’t believe I’m in the mood. Isn’t that what you ladies say?” Alec asked, feeling inexplicably betrayed. Really, what did it matter to him if she’d dressed as a dwarf or in sackcloth and ashes these past four years? She had accomplished what he’d hired her for—Bauer was no longer employed at the spa and Edith was avenged.

“I wouldn’t know. I’m not a lady, just a grocer’s daughter.” There was the chin again.

“And a liar, don’t forget. A charlatan.” A chameleon, who turned from doddering dowager to pocket Venus.

Mary’s lips curled. “What makes me different from your actress friends, then? Don’t they lie with every word onstage? You don’t seem to mind
them.
A dozen of them at least if the gossip rags are accurate.”

Hoisted on his own petard. Damn her for throwing his reputation back in his face. “All the world is
not
a stage, contrary to that Shakespeare fellow, Miss Arden. Miss Evensong. Whoever,” Alec replied, tangling his foot in the leg of his pants.

“You hired me to lie,” Mary reminded him.

“But not to me.”

“I’ve told you the truth now! But I won’t beg you to come back to bed. No doubt I’m nothing like the women you’re used to.”

No, she jolly well was not. Alec let out an exasperated sigh, and not at his evident inability to get back into his own pants. “Are you trying to get me to compliment you?”

“Certainly not!” Mary huffed. “I would never want you to say or do anything that goes against your beliefs. It’s clear you have a disgust of me.” She clutched the sheet tighter. “This has all been a terrible mistake. You can get us to the evening train and we can forget about the whole affair. If you wish,” she said with some brutality, “I shall give you a full refund.”

“A full refund! I don’t want my money back, you daft woman! I just don’t like being used. You’ve played me for a fool, Mary Arden . . . Evensong. You might have told me at the beginning who you really were. All those blushes and stutters—by God, if they gave out acting awards, you’d be first in line to get one!”

“I haven’t been acting with you!” Mary said hotly. “I just wanted a little experience. Is that such a crime? You have no idea—” She broke off, probably deciding he didn’t have an idea and never would have.

“You know much more than I thought, if you could deal with the Burleigh mess.”

“Anyone can read a book, Alec. One hears things at school, even over the grocery counter, if you can believe that. Aunt Mim was always around to give me advice, too. I am every bit as innocent as you thought. Or I used to be,” she reflected, reminding him of all the things they’d done together the past few days.

Wet things. Wicked things. Warm kisses on her sweet puckered mouth and warmer ones where they really counted.

“Innocent.” Alec snorted, but he didn’t try to stand up. By God, the woman was a witch.

“Innocent,” Mary affirmed. “But perhaps there will be someone in London to relieve me of my unwanted virginity. Someone with fewer scruples than you have, if that’s possible.”

Alec felt the hot color wash over his face. “I’ll show you scruples,” he growled, and tugged his foot out of his pants.

Chapter

28

O
h dear, but he was angry. What had made her reveal her identity in such a careless fashion? Of course she had wondered what he wore beneath his black and yellow kilt the first day she’d met him—even Aunt Mim might have been curious if she had seen him in all his Highland glory.

And she
would
have told him who she really was.

Eventually.

Maybe.

After.

But she’d blurted it out before, and now it seemed things were going to be very odd indeed. A few minutes ago, she had been perched atop Alec’s massive thighs, dripping an embarrassing amount of fluid onto his talented fingers, wondering exactly what he meant by giving her “the reins.” Did he expect her to ride him while he looked up at her touching her breasts, his dark gaze so acute? She had felt somewhat mortified. Exposed. She didn’t want to be in control—Mary really had no idea how this act was all supposed to be achieved, and that was precisely why she had sought Alec’s assistance. He was a legendary lover, was he not?

At least with everyone except for his wife.

She might have seen and heard a shocking thing or two in the underbelly of the best of British society in her masquerade as Mrs. Evensong, but she was totally at sea now. Alec’s anger did not seem to depress his ardor one whit as he slanted his mouth over hers. She gave a little yelp as his tongue burrowed into her mouth, hot and seeking. Gone was the gentle, teasing man who showed such hesitance and concern for her sensibilities. Mary was drowning in his corded arms, breathless, airless.

And somehow she wasn’t tempted to clout him on the head to stop him. He was rather masterful, really, all muscle and masculine intent. She felt his erection against her belly and snaked a hand down to it. He’d seemed to like her touch before, and judging from the near-violent racking of his body now, he still did.

Alec growled into her mouth, nipping her tongue, pressing a big hand into her loosened hair, the other onto her mound. Mary wished he’d tuck his fingers inside her again to improve her, and soon he did. He must have telepathic capabilities, knowing exactly what a woman needed at any moment, for he was certainly—oh—doing a splendid job of it. His thumb pressed against the knot of flesh at her apex, driving it into her pubic bone—she
had
read books—and driving her wild.

She raised her hips up, ready to fly. So close, so close, just beyond the corner. He was steel velvet in her hand—one day she’d like to examine him thoroughly but right now her eyes were closed, tiny red sparks flashing beneath her lids. All the while, their kiss veered between playful and purposeful, and after a bit Mary just let the sensation wash over her like a warm wave. She was cradled beneath him, safe, his hand over hers now as he centered himself to breach her.

The discomfort wasn’t so very bad, but she forgot to relax for a moment. She may even have cried out. Alec continued to kiss her, teasing his tongue over hers as he eased himself inside her and then stilled. Her eyes fluttered open to see his, dark as death above her.

He broke the kiss. “Are you all right?”

“Of course I’m all right. Do we have to talk right now?”

He chuckled, and she felt his cock twitch inside her, as if it were in on some joke. “Nay. What would you like to do, Miss Evensong?”

“Well, the—the usual, I suppose.” Really, what was the man getting at? She was stretched to the limit and could not think.

Did not
want
to think. The lovely loose feeling she had was evaporating, and she wanted it back.

“Och. The usual, is it? Well then, wrap your legs around me, yes, just like that.”

Mary thought he’d slipped in even deeper, if that were possible. Her every nerve was racing to her lower region. She felt swollen and lush, and yet still uncomfortable.

“Your arms, too. Make that one arm. Keep a hand between us and touch yourself as I was doing before. I’d do that myself but I don’t want to crush you—you’re such a little bit of a thing.”

He was braced above her, and there was too much space between them. Mary wanted skin on skin, her breasts brushing his broad chest. She could see what he meant about having more hands. They’d be very useful about now, because she wished to pull his shadowed face back down for more kisses instead of this odd conversation. She angled her hips and dug her heels into his buttocks, hoping to distract him from the shy hand that sought her center. It was very wicked, but my, if felt wonderful. To be filled and touched at the same time, even by her own fingers.

And then she understood the reason for the distance, as he swooped down to capture a nipple in his mouth. The suckling tug went directly to her groin, and she may have made another noise again. He divided his time between her breasts, tongue swirling, teeth grazing, as she fingered herself more frantically. He was moving now, in and out, and she rose to meet him, hearing her arousal with every slippery slow thrust and teasing retreat.

The sound should have been embarrassing but was not. It became a kind of music, the tempo changing as she opened to him, the groan of the mattress adding bass notes. The cloud of unfamiliar male scent, the dampness, the roughness of his beard against her throat, the sweet and savage kisses, the satisfied grunts of possession—Mary allowed all of it to sweep her away. She had dreamed of this for years, and this was so much better than any dream. They were joined precisely where they needed to be and in moments she would fracture apart.

Alec knew before she did and acted accordingly. His fingers replaced hers and she really did scream now—there was no doubt about it. With one final elegant twist, Alec withdrew from her body and spilled onto the sheet as she shattered beside him. His face was a mask of blissful agony as he pumped his cock into the linen, and Mary wondered if she’d looked the same.

Wild. Primitive. Pure.

He had been watching her—she’d seen him through the slit of her eyelids just when she thought she could bear no more. His eyes had been black and glittering, his grin feral, like some proud, delicious demon.

He had every right to feel pride. The entire encounter had been beyond educational. Quite ethereal actually, especially toward the end. In fact, she wanted to do it all over again, as soon as possible, if he didn’t remember to be angry with her about her deception.

Alec didn’t look angry now. His face had smoothed and his lips were parted a fraction as he tried to draw breath. She touched a bristly cheek as gently as she knew how.

“Thank you, Alec,” she whispered.

“I should be thanking you. Are you sure you’re all right? Not too sore?”

“I’m fine. Truly.” But now that the heavenly friction had disappeared, she could acknowledge she felt
something
.

There must have been uncertainty on her face. He sprang off the bed and went into his bathroom, returning with a glass full of warm water and a flannel. “Lie still and I’ll take care of you.”

“I told you I’m fine!” But when she looked down, she saw the streaks of blood on her thighs and felt a little light-headed. She’d bandaged her bleeding nephews often enough, and had seen enough butchered meat to last a lifetime. Why was the sight of her own loss of innocence a problem?

“Steady, now. My God, I’m sorry for this, Mary.”

“D-don’t be. It’s—it’s nothing.”

He was so careful, swabbing and patting, parting her folds with extreme delicacy and wiping away the wet. There was a bleakness about him, though—guilt—and she wanted to smack him.

“I asked for this, Alec. And it was lovely. Really,
lovely
doesn’t begin to cover it. I’ll have to consult a thesaurus.”

“I was a brute. Look at you, like a porcelain statue! And look at me—a bull in a china shop. I’ve hurt you.”

“But you didn’t! Well, maybe a little at first, but after that it was—oh goodness, now are
you
the one fishing for compliments? I have nothing to compare you to, but I assure you, I enjoyed myself very much. In fact, let’s do it again right now.” She plastered a smile on her face, avoiding looking at the bloody washcloth.

An eyebrow quirked. “Right now? You do think me a bull then. I’m afraid men take more than a minute to recover themselves. And I would never abuse you so soon after you’ve lost your maidenhead.”

“I didn’t
lose
it,” Mary said. “You make it sound like a dropped handkerchief or a misplaced glove. It was just a bit of tissue, after all, completely pointless, like one’s appendix.”

Alec stared at her, then threw back his head and laughed. She loved to see him like this, the brooding Highlander disappearing. He should laugh more.

And Mary decided to make that her mission for the time that remained at Raeburn Court. They both could do with some levity in their lives, at least for a little while.

“No wonder you could pass as your aunt. You are old-headed, aren’t you? A practical girl.”

“
Practical
is my middle name. Well, actually, it’s Arden, and you know that now. And I’m usually prepared, too. Thank you for not—” How could she frame her words?
Emitting
or
ejaculating
sounded so clinical. “Um, at the end . . . uh, thank you.” She even possessed a German contraption, smuggled in out of curiosity, but it was buried in her stocking drawer back in London. Her hand had hovered over it as she was packing for Scotland, but she hadn’t the nerve to bring it.

To bring it would have meant she’d already decided that Lord Alec Raeburn was the man for her, and that would have tempted fate. A grocery clerk and a baron? Ridiculous! But fate must have heard her yearning, for here she was in Alec’s bed, being cosseted.

“Aye, I’m usually better prepared, too. I’ve no by-blows I’m aware of,” Alec said, his cheeks reddening right along with hers. What a funny conversation to be having. Their passion spent, it was almost as if they were friends.

“There are condoms in my trunk,” Alec continued. He folded the wet cloth and set it on the bedside table. It would leave a mark on the wood, but Mary didn’t want to nag. “We’ll take them to the gatehouse. If we go, that is. You will be staying a few more days, won’t you?”

Mary tried to smile. “Do you want me to? I thought you were rather put out with me.”

“Aye, so I was. I don’t like a woman to be untruthful.”

Like Edith.
Alec had been almost mortally wounded by his wife.

“I promise to tell you everything from now on. Not about the agency, of course. Our work is confidential.”

“I don’t care about Burleigh or any of that. I’ve had enough problems of my own,” Alec said, pulling the sheet back over her. “Well then, we’ve kissed and made up, so to speak. Are you cold? I could start a fire.”

She was, even though it was June. The thick stone walls of Raeburn Court seemed to have trapped winter’s chill inside them. “But we aren’t staying here, are we?”

“Mac is still fussing over the gatehouse for us. I had some particular arrangements I wanted him to make. A surprise. He’s not back yet.”

“How do you know? He may have come back when we were—” Not
fornicating
, that sounded wretched.

But not
making love
either. That would attach far too much significance to what had just happened. Mary felt her heart wrinkle just a little.

“—otherwise occupied,” Alec supplied. “No, he took the wagon, and I’d have heard it return. It’s funny, we’re so isolated up here—or were before the hotel was built—the least little noise was audible for miles. My little brother, Nick, claims he can hear a bird’s feather drop over the loch. We always knew when our parents were returning from Edinburgh or London, and would be all lined up on the front step even before the carriage came through the gates. My mother thought we were touched.”

He was relaxed, comfortable sitting on the edge of the bed in his own naked skin as he reminisced about his childhood. Alec was, Mary thought, a rather magnificent creature, almost larger than life, if that could be said about an actual living man. His shoulders were broad, his chest defined and dusted with dark silky hair. To her regret, one large hand had settled over his manhood. Mary gulped when she saw flecks of her blood on his thigh.

She grabbed the washcloth and made a hesitant swipe. He looked down and took the flannel from her.

“Hell. What have I been thinking? We should have a bath.”

“T-together?” Why she should feel shy about it after what they’d just done was a mystery for the ages.

“Aren’t you the saucy one? Nay, my love. My tub’s not big enough for two—we’d get stuck and I don’t think Evan would ever let me forget it. He’s around here somewhere. You’ll meet him. That is, if you want to. He’s more or less a discreet fellow, which I canna say for Nick, wherever he may be. Wild as the day is long, that one.”

He said it with affection. Alec loved his brothers. He was a nice man, too nice to go through life all alone up here with only their company, listening for feathers to drop into lakes.

Stop it.
She pinched herself mentally. She mustn’t confuse this afternoon’s lust with love. What good would it do her to fall in love with Lord Alec Raeburn?