Read Irreversible Damage (Irreparable) Online
Authors: KJ Bell
Tug’s shoulders sag slightly as he backs down. “Tori and I are friends.”
I push on. My chest swells. “But you still wish it was more than that?”
He takes a step backward with a disgusted look on his face. Or maybe he’s hurt. “You can be such a dick sometimes, bro.” He walks toward the door. His hand reaches for the knob. But then he stops and turns back to me. “Yes, I care about her. That’s it.” He’s firm in his words. “What’s really bothering you?”
Fuck! I am a dick. I can’t help it. Tug’s right. My insecurities have nothing to do with Tug. I know he and Tori are only friends. She loves me. I’m not being truthful with her about Davey. I should. Only now that I know he bothers her, I can’t. She’ll never give him a chance if I do. I’d be irate if she held something back from me. That’s what’s got me so annoyed. Admitting that to Tug now would make me look like a complete asshole, which I am.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him, looking down. “That wasn’t cool.”
“No, it wasn’t.” He smiles. I’m relieved to see it. “I would never try to come between you and Tori.”
“I know you wouldn’t.” It’s time to drop it. I love my brother. We’ve been through too much shit together to fight. “Are you two going to lunch?”
He knows I’m done discussing it. He nods. “You want us to bring you back anything?”
“No,” I mumble. The tension rolls off him. Damn it. I shouldn’t have said anything. Tug would never try to come between Tori and I again. “Are we good?”
“We’re good.” He smiles and comes at me. I back away from the sarcastic twerp when he tries to wrap me in a hug, but he keeps coming. “Come on, give Tuggy a hug.”
He’s certifiable. “No way, man.” I hold out an arm to keep him at bay. “Get off me.”
“I’m truly offended.” He stops and laughs. “I’m trying to make nice here.”
“Consider nice made,” I assure him. “Now go feed my girls.”
Tug turns to leave. He stops at the doorway before turning to face me. “Seriously, though. We’re good, but you’re going to have to tell Tori.”
He’s right. “I will.”
Chapter 3
Tori
As Tug and I stroll out of the house, Jesse’s beat-up van pulls into the driveway. With a quick wave, Jesse drives off to the side. He parks, leaving enough room for Tug to back out.
I tense when the side door of the van slides open. Davey steps out. His jeans hang low – too low – belted just above the knees. The majority of his plaid boxers is exposed. He stares right at me. His hand slips up under his dirty T-shirt to scratch his gut. He’s not fat, but he’s not fit, either.
I snap my eyes away to Jesse, who smiles brightly when he sees me. He waves. Chad gets out of the passenger side, wearing only board shorts, a beer in hand. He smiles, hoisting his beer up in greeting.
His tanned, shirtless frame glistens in the sun, along with his shoulder-length blond hair. I laugh, wondering if he even owns a shirt. I’ve never seen him wear one. Tug walks over to the van. I follow behind him. My gaze stays on Tug’s back to avoid eye contact with Davey, although I feel his eyes on me. After bumping fists with Tug, Jesse gives me a hug. He squats down to my belly and says hello to Mona. When he stands, he rubs a circle over my bump. This is his routine. Say hi to the baby, rub my bump, and then say hello to me.
“You’re looking beautiful as ever,” Jesse compliments me. Chad follows next with a big hug and a hello. Davey doesn’t say anything to me. He nods a chin at Tug. His dark hair is greasy. I can’t help but wonder when he last showered. It’s a shame, really. If he cleaned up a bit, he’d be a halfway decent-looking guy. I guess that goes for his insides, too. If he softened up, he’d be more approachable.
Jesse and Chad grew up with Brady. I’ve known them most of my life. They’ve become a staple in the house since they all decided to form a band. I’m extremely fond of both of them. Davey is the late and unwelcome arrival to the group. He showed up a couple of weeks ago with all of his uncomfortable angst. Glancing over at Davey sends a twinge of guilt through me. Maybe I’m not giving him a fair shot. Am I being too hard on him simply because he’s the “new guy”? So he has a past. Brady has a past, and I found a way to love him. I should try to be nice to Davey.
I force a smile. It’s awkward and doesn’t fit right on my face. “Hi, Davey. How are you?”
“Good.”
His quick reply comes without a smile or a trace of sincerity. He’s going to make trying difficult. His stare unnerves me. I suddenly feel more uneasy. My skin crawls. I shake my shoulders and do my best not to cringe.
Tug saves me. “Tori and I are off to lunch. Brady’s in the studio. We’ll catch you guys later.”
The three of them take the path to the side of the house toward the door that leads into the studio from the outside.
I wait until they’ve turned the corner before I turn to Tug and say, “See! He’s a total creeper.”
Tug laughs and makes his way to the driver’s side of his car.
I lower myself into Tug’s Porsche while he puts the top down. Heat radiates from the leather seats, nearly burning my skin. I break out in a sweat. Nearly eight months pregnant in the dead of summer sucks. If I ever decide to have another kid, I’m going to plan it better. Plan it, period.
Tug loves this car. It’s a far cry from the Honda he used to drive. Then again, Tug is a far cry from the man he used to be. It’s still hard for me to believe that he’s in charge of a billion-dollar company. Sometimes I’m not sure I recognize the man he’s become.
He pulls a bag from the back seat. It has a baby screaming its head off on it. I’m sure he thinks it’s hilarious. He hands it to me with a boyish smile on his face. Now, that’s a look I recognize. “A little something for Mona to wear.”
I’m instantly suspicious.
I open the bag and pull out a tiny pink onesie. As I hold it up, I see the writing on the front. I laugh when I read it and shake my head.
Call this number for my very adorable single uncle
. I can’t believe he used his real phone number.
“You are not using my daughter to get girls,” I tell him as firmly as I can, holding back a laugh.
“Of course I am.” He chuckles, his head hitting the back of the seat. “Perks of the job.”
I roll my eyes and stuff the onesie back in the bag, reminding myself to hide it when I get home.
***
Tug and I eat a quick lunch before stopping off at the Center to see if Rodrigo needs anything. I’ll never forget the first time Brady brought me here. I knew after that visit there was no way to deny my love for him. The money and time he’s invested in this place gives these kids a future. They may not get adopted into a conventional home, but because of Brady they have a family here and a safe place to grow up. A place they’re loved. Even Tug enjoys spending time here, although his duties at Gibson give him little opportunity to do so.
Being here brings tremendous, and much needed, healing to all of us.
It’s lunchtime when we arrive. As we enter the cafeteria, I spot Liv and Harrison at a table with Paco and Camilia. Liv has a soft spot for those two kids. We all do. I think Liv copes with the pain of losing her parents by making sure Paco and Camilia never feel alone.
She spots Tug and me, and waves us over. I take the seat next to her. Tug continues to stand, high-fiving Paco.
Camilia smiles up at me with her pigtails bouncing. “Did you have the baby yet?”
I smile and pat her on the head. “No, not yet.”
“You dork.” Paco laughs. “Does it look like she had the baby yet?”
“Paco,” Liv scolds. I laugh. The two of them remind me so much of Liv and Tug.
“It feels like forever,” Camilia whines.
It does feel like forever.
I tap Camilia on the nose. “I’ll tell you what, when I have the baby, you’ll be the first to know.”
She beams up at me. “Really?”
I nod. “Really.”
“So, where’s Brady?” Liv asks.
“The guys are over.” I shrug, frowning.
She and Tug exchange a glance. What was that about? Before I get a chance to ask, Harrison stands and informs Tug that they are on dish detail.
“Every time I come here, I get put to work,” Tug whines like the petulant child he can sometimes be.
“Rodrigo says hard work is good for you,” Paco offers, looking up at Tug with a gap-toothed grin.
I laugh, glancing at Tug. “He’s got you there.”
“He does, does he?” Paco nods, and Tug lifts him from the seat and starts tickling him. Paco laughs uncontrollably. “Good, then you can help.” He sets Paco down. “Come on, Camilia, you, too.”
When the boys are out of earshot, I shoot Liv my “I’m your best friend and you’d better tell me what that was all about” look.
She knows immediately what I want to know. “Tug mentioned he told you about Davey’s drug problem. I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about it.”
How
do
I feel about it? Brady assured me that part of Davey’s life is behind him. This is Liv. She’s my best friend. If I lie, she’ll see right through it. “I’m skeptical.”
She nods expectantly. “They were really close.”
How do I not remember him if they were such great friends? It’s a mystery. I practically lived at their house. “So I’ve heard.”
She rolls her eyes at my sarcasm.
“How come I never met him before?”
Her brow wrinkles, and she looks past me. “My parents didn’t allow him to come over.”
“Ah, because of the drug problem.”
She nods. “They suspected.”
“Brady says he’s clean.” I sound doubtful. I feel like Brady’s keeping something from me.
“He’s supposed to be.” She sounds just as doubtful.
I’m curious. “What do you think of him?”
“I’m not sure,” she admits, picking at some invisible lint on her sweater. It’s a nervous habit. “I don’t really know him, but he’s gotten Brady in plenty of trouble.”
That surprises me. Brady never needed any help finding “trouble”. I think about Davey’s sudden return to Brady’s life, concerned he’s intending to stir up “trouble” again. “Where’s he been, anyway?”
Liv shrugs. “Not sure about that, either.” Her frown grows bigger. “I know Brady wants to see the good in him.”
I know he does, too. He tries to see the good in everyone. It’s one of his qualities that I have a love/hate relationship with. It’s clear Liv is as worried about Davey’s presence as I am.
“Okay, enough about Davey.” I offer an escape for both of us. This conversation is getting depressing. “What are your plans tonight?”
She scrunches her nose. “It’s weekly dinner with Harrison’s folks.”
“Are they still pushing for him to move back to P.B.?” I remember how upset they were when he moved in with us. Their family didn’t approve of Harrison dating Liv at first. I can’t say I blame them, considering Liv’s mother was responsible for the death of their niece Vanessa and the shit storm that followed. It’s still hard to believe Sheila paid Harrison’s family five million dollars for their silence.
“I think they’ve accepted it.” Her tone alerts me that our thoughts are in the same place. I feel bad. Liv loved her mother. It’s hard for her to accept that she never truly knew her. “When he started back up with classes, they laid off.”
Before she learned the truth about her mother, Liv was one of the most confident people I knew. I hate seeing her so insecure. “Do you think you’ll go back to school?” I try to steer the conversation away from Harrison’s family or her nut-job mother.
“I’m thinking about it for next semester,” she tells me before a huge grin sweeps over her face. “Of course when Mona gets here, I may change my mind and be a full-time auntie.”
She’ll do it, too. She’ll smother the hell out of Mona. I have to admit how much I love her excitement.
“You will not spoil her, Liv,” I warn her, though I’m smiling too large to be taken seriously.
“You bet your ass I will.” She laughs a genuine laugh, her anxiety about Harrison’s folks forgotten.
Tug returns from dish detail and asks if I’m ready to go. I nod and get up from the table. Liv rises from the table and gives me a hug. “I’ll see you at home.”
Tug drapes an arm around Liv, kissing the side of her head. “See you later, sis.”
She elbows his side in a huff. I smile. They may fight, but deep down they love each other.
Chapter 4
Tori
When Tug drops me off, there are no cars in the driveway. I’m relieved to know that the guys have left, which means no awkward encounters with the creeper. As I enter the house, I call Brady’s name. He doesn’t respond. I assume he’s still in the studio, as the door is open slightly. I hear a guitar playing, along with a familiar voice. Brady’s voice.
Brady sings?
I’ve never heard him sing before. I peek through the crack in the door to find Brady sitting on a stool, strumming his guitar, shirtless and looking like a rock star. Just the sight of him has my body aching for him to touch me. His eyes follow his fingers as he strums each note.
I turn my head, placing my ear in front of the crack to listen. I’m amazed by what I hear. There’s a soulful tone to his voice, almost heartbreaking. He’s singing about losing someone. As I take in each word, I realize the song is about his mother. It’s sad and haunting, yet breathtaking and beautiful, too. I open the door, and he stops. His eyes sparkle as he spins on his stool and pins me with a sexy smile before setting the guitar against the stand on the floor. I close the door, stroll over to him, and straddle him, throwing my arms around his neck and resting my cheek on his hard, comforting chest. His arms reach around my waist, slipping up the back of my shirt, his hands heating my skin as they travel up my spine.
I lean back and hold his face in my hands. “That was beautiful.”
A long sigh escapes his lips, and his eyes dart away. He’s uncomfortable. “It was nothing.”
I pull his face to look him in the eyes. “She loved you.”
“She’s dead.” His tone is ice.
“Brady!” I scold, though I know it’s hard for him.
He leans in and brushes his lips over mine once before joining our foreheads. His eyes reflect insufferable pain. “I can’t talk about it.”