Joshua's Montana Bride (Sweet, Clean Western Historical Romance)(Montana Ranchers and Brides Series) (10 page)

His mind was a whirl of confusing thoughts. His throat was dry and parched already. He pulled the horse up on the ridge and took out his flask of water and took a long drink of the cold water. Looking down onto the wide expanse before him, he saw the herd way off to the west.

He gazed out across the land, searching for any sign of Laura. There was no sign of her.

He felt a flush of pride every time he saw his spread from up here, and now was no exception. He had made this all come true; he had forged this with his will, and the help of people who apparently held him in affection. And that was the truth about the whole thing, and the reason why he wanted Laura so much. Even if a man made and shaped a land; built a living up from virtually nothing; it didn't mean a thing if he couldn't share it with someone.

Above all, he wanted to share this with Laura. It was the reason he had admired her for such a long time before their marriage; it was the reason why he had seized his chance when Belinda Thorne had suggested matrimony; it was why he was out here, searching for her, burning with anxiety about her safety.

He wanted to share his whole being, his entire world with the feisty, impetuous young woman who was so determined to live life on her own terms.

Joshua thought about the fierce resolve on her face as she had stormed out of the parlor, and smiled to himself. She was truly amazing. He felt something in his heart that he had never felt before. It was a mixture of deep affection and true longing. Those feelings had been growing in the past few days, through all his failed efforts at convincing her that life with him was all she needed. And now that she had run out on him, those same feelings had driven him out on the range, searching for this woman who had found her way into his heart.

Joshua took one more swig of water and felt the liquid catch in his throat as he saw something of in the distance.

A dust plume. Could it be a horse that was causing that? It was off to the east, heading away from the herd.

Yes. It had to be her.

He suddenly knew where she was heading. It could only be one place. Somewhere they both knew, a corner of the ranch where they both had history.

Joshua jammed the flask into the saddle, flicked the reins, and started down the hillside in the direction of what he was sure was the figure of his wife trying to do something unacceptable.

Trying to put some distance between herself and her husband.

That was something he wasn't going to allow to continue for much longer.

Laura tied the horse to a drooping branch and gazed at the one thing that was guaranteed to bring peace to her soul.

The river. The beautiful flowing river.

Laura stepped through the thick grass, lifting her skirt and stopped on the bank of the river. She let her eyes drift slowly across the view of the glittering, shimmering fast flowing water. The sound of the water was like music to her ears.

This was a place that was dear to her heart. A place where she had so many wonderful memories, some of which even included Joshua.

Laura strolled along the river's edge and headed toward her favorite part.

The bend in the river.

A wide, expansive curve of roiling water twisted around and away into the distance, across the flat plain. The far away mountains shimmered in the bright sun.

Laura drew in a deep, slow breath and let the place just sink into her, become a part of her, just like it had done so many times in the past.

She found a familiar flat area by the riverside and sank down, savoring the feel of the earth beneath her, solid, reassuring. Sitting in this one place where, as a much younger woman, she had come to escape so many times, to be herself, away from other people, allowed a familiar peace to settle inside her.

She leaned back, her hands sinking into the soft grass, the cool of the earth spreading through her fingers. Laura raised her head, closed her eyes, and felt the warmth of the sun on her face. It felt good to be here. Her mind filled with memories of the many times she'd been here. She loved the view from here. Montana never looked so fine, so perfect as it did from this one spot. From here she could drink in the beauty of this place, appreciate the soul filling calm that overwhelmed her.

This was indeed a special place. Over the years she and her family had gotten to know these Montana lands from which so many ranchers drew their livelihoods. There were mountains, valleys, ridges, expansive ranges, forests. But, for Laura, none of them compared to the sheer beauty of this simple bend in the river, with it's peaceful location and stunning views. She had come here with her family for picnics, and she'd even had playful afternoons when a certain Joshua McKenzie had accompanied the family on their outing.

Laura thought about Joshua. Back then, when he had been a family friend, always around, seemingly always visiting for one reason or another, Laura had thought nothing of the fact that he was such a regular visitor. Now, sitting here, by the side of the river, it occurred to her that maybe the reason for his regular presence around her family had indeed been for another reason which she had completely missed at the time.

Could it be that Joshua McKenzie had been sweet on her, even back then, when she had been eighteen, going on nineteen, and beyond? Had she completely missed the fact that he'd always wanted her, and that their friendship had, in fact been so much more than just that?

Laura picked up a small stone and tossed it into the water. She smiled at the reassuring sound it made, watching the ripples spreading outwards.

Perhaps it had been fated that she should become Joshua's wife, after all. But how could she have been so blind?

There was only one reason for that blindness, and she knew that it had been responsible for her impulsive decision to run away. The one black spot in an otherwise idyllic set of memories was Eli. Even here, in this lovely place, she recalled his boredom, his complaints, his demands that he be allowed to go home and attend to the family business. He'd had no time for what he thought was a frivolous waste of valuable time. But, as always, their mother had prevailed. And Eli had capitulated.

A sudden rumble of horse's hooves behind her dragged Laura's attention back to the present. She twisted and saw the one person who would have known where to find her. A curl of nerves twisted inside her.

It was Joshua. His eyes were wide as he watched Laura standing up and tidying her skirt, shaking some of the loose grass from it.

Joshua pulled the horse to a halt and came down, flipping the reins around a thick fallen branch. Joshua was out of breath, his face flushed, a sheen of sweat covering it.

He ran a hand through his damp hair. "Laura. I thought I'd find you here," he gasped.

Laura extended her arms out by her sides. "Well. You found me."

Joshua came up to Laura and took her firmly, but gently by the arms. "Why did you run like that?"

"I didn't run."

"That horse is a danger," Joshua said with sudden sharpness. "I asked you not to ride him so soon."

Joshua didn't seem angry, so much as truly, deeply concerned for Laura's safety. That gave her a quiver of pleasure. He'd come racing all the way out here after her, needing to make sure she was safe, wanting to know that she hadn't come to harm.

"He was fine," she said trying to summon up as casual a tone of voice as possible. "He's fast and strong. Sure footed."

Joshua's eyes widened. "You didn't fall did you?"

Laura squinted. "Of course I didn't. You know I can ride. You've always known that."

"Sure I have. I do remember some things, you know."

Joshua seemed so relieved. The worry in his eyes had dissipated slightly, but there was still a dark, fierce look in them that caught Laura's attention.

"Why don't we sit down. You look like you've been riding fast," she said glancing toward the riverbank.

Joshua shrugged. "I guess I have." As they moved to the river's edge Joshua curled an arm around Laura's waist. She glanced at him at he did that, seeing the tightness in his shoulders soften.

"I spotted you from the ridge," he told her.

"Why am I not surprised," she admitted.

They sat down on the grass. Up close she could see the evidence of just how fast he'd been riding. Sweat darkened the edges and corners of his shirt.

Laura quirked a brow. "You always did know how to find me."

Joshua eyes narrowed in puzzlement. He seemed not to catch her drift.

Laura gave him a teasing smile. "Don't you remember all the games of hide and seek we played here when my family came for picnics?"

Recollection flashed in Joshua's eyes. He looked around at the scattered trees that ran along both sides of the river. Laura thought she could see the sweet, sunny afternoon memories flood into Joshua's mind. His features softened at the recollections.

"I remember you were particularly good at hiding when it was my turn to seek," he said with a smile, the likes of which she hadn't seen in a long while. It was good to see him smile like that, especially here in this place which brought back so many good memories; her father playing games with her and Eli; her mother and father together, happy and relaxed as if nothing in the world could spoil the contentment of being in this place with their two beloved children.

For a brief moment Laura lowered her head, turning away from Joshua, not wanting him to see how those memories were affecting her. Joshua reached over and lifted her chin. His gaze was serious, intense for a moment.

"I'm glad you're okay," he said softly.

The rushing of the river competed with the sudden racing of Laura's heart. His fingers were so gentle, yet there was a strength in them.

Laura smiled at Joshua and gazed into his eyes. Words that should have come, defensive comments that would have made it so easy for her to just lift her head away from his touch, just froze on her open lips.

The cry of a bird high above broke the moment. Joshua lifted his head and looked up. Laura used that moment to clear her throat and shift some loose hairs away from the side of her face.

"Joshua. We need to talk," she said.

His eyes darkened slightly at that, but he nodded in quiet agreement. "Sure."

Laura felt suddenly awkward, unsure of what was really on her mind. How could she broach the subject of the reasons for her behavior these past few days; the warring emotions that had been burning inside her; the worries that threatened to overwhelm her.

Joshua rested a hand on her arm. "Say what you need to say, Laura," he murmured.

Laura's throat tightened, but she knew she had to say what was on her mind. She owed it to them both. If they were going to have any chance of a future together, then they would have to be clear about how things were going to be between them from now on.

"I know I haven't been the easiest person to be around since the wedding," she said.

Joshua said nothing, merely nodding.

"And I know I've made your life difficult. I've seen how hard you've worked to try to make things as pleasant for me as possible. And I do appreciate it all. I really do, Joshua," she said.

He smiled and his eyes twinkled.

Laura cleared her throat once more and continued. "I don't want to appear ungrateful. But I guess that's how it looks. You must think I'm some kind of spoiled shrew," she said, her eyes moistening.

Joshua shook his head. "Not at all. That's just not true," he said reaching over and tracing the back of his fingers gently down her cheek.

"But I know it is. I don't know how you've put up with me. I must have been trying everyone's patience. Even Mrs. Bell. She's been so nice to me. And I've been such a nuisance."

Joshua's hand cupped the side of Laura's face. "Don't be so hard on yourself. I know that everything's been real difficult for you. It's only natural that it's going to take some time for you to get used to your new life."

"Our new life," she said looking into his eyes.

Joshua's mouth dropped open. He smiled. "I guess you're right. Our new life."

Laura sighed. "I just feel that I've been so unfair to you. Being so cold and distant. Seems like nothing you do can please me. But that's not true. Not true at all," she declared, her voice rising. "I appreciate everything you've done."

Laura could see that her words were affecting him, moving him. She so wanted him to believe that her coldness, her distance hadn't been because of anything he had done. It had really been because she was finding it all so tough. Leaving behind the life on her parents' ranch should have been easy. But it hadn't been.

Joshua held her hand. "I told you from the start that there is only one thing that is important to me. And that is your happiness. Nothing else matters. I don't care what it takes, or how long I have to wait. I am bound and determined to make you happy. You are my wife. Now and forever. And that means more to me than anything else on earth."

Joshua leaned in closer and she could feel his breath against her face. His eyes were still and focused, piercing in their intensity. "I will not be denied, Laura McKenzie. You know that. Don't you," he declared.

Laura's heart raced. Joshua's hand went to the side of her neck, tracing the racing pulse there with his thumb. In that moment she was certain that they would always be together. How could it be any other way when the man in her life had spoken such words to her. His words had burrowed their way deep into her soul, here by the side of the river, in the only place where she had ever truly known peace and contentment.

"So you don't need to apologise to me for anything. I'm your husband. I know what moves you, what pleases you, what gives you meaning in your life. I've always known. And I have patience. I can wait."

Laura raised a hand to her chest. The emotion that had welled up had to be contained. Somehow. How could this man be so understanding, so mature, so sensitive to her needs? She couldn't fathom it, but it was true in spite of her obvious inability to truly understand him. It would take time for them to get to know each other. That was for sure. But in the meantime, how was she going to deny him, to restrain his ardent attentions?