Julia's Last Hope (16 page)
“Look!” cried Felicity, as they dressed the next morning.
Jennifer looked, though she didn’t seem too concerned.
“Look how tight this bodice is getting. I feel so—so conspicuous in it. Doesn’t it bother you?”
Jennifer nodded. Ill-fitting dresses bothered her too. But she didn’t see any sense in fussing about them. There was really nothing her folks could do.
“Jen, do you really think Mama is going to make it?”
“What do you mean?” asked Jennifer, hoping she wouldn’t need to answer the question.
“Do you really think this will ever be a resort town?”
“I don’t know,” answered Jennifer. “Mama has worked awfully hard to make it one.”
“I know, but some things are impossible—even for Mama.”
Jennifer smiled. It was one of their shared jokes. They never spoke of it to any other person. That would have been disrespectful. But through the years, they had joked with each other about their mother’s need to fix things. “Let Mama do it,” they would tease. “Just give it to Mama,” “Bet Mama could fix it,” and “Have you shown it to Mama?” as though there was not a thing in the world Julia couldn’t manage, either by coaxing or by coercion.
“Well, we mustn’t give up yet,” whispered Jennifer. “Mama hasn’t.”
Felicity shrugged. “I think some of the other ladies have almost given up. Did you see Mrs. Shannon yesterday?”
Jennifer nodded. She had noticed the strained, hopeless look in the woman’s face.
“Maybe she was just tired. She has so many children to care for—she must feel like the old woman in the shoe.”
Felicity tied the bow at the waist of her dress. She had already forgotten about Mrs. Shannon. She studied herself in the mirror. “You know,” she said to her twin, “I get more and more thankful for big aprons.”
Jennifer laughed. Hettie’s big aprons worked well to hide one’s appearance, but they were not very becoming to young figures.
“We’d better get down to breakfast,” Jennifer said with a quick glance at the clock. “Mama will be calling us if we don’t hurry.”
The day’s mail brought a letter. The Harrigans were to have more house guests. Julia breathed prayers of thanks all the way home from the post office.
“We needed this one so badly, Lord,” she explained. Then added, “But of course you knew that. Thank you, Lord. Thank you.”
She hurried home to share her good news. “Hettie,” she cried as soon as she entered the hall. “Hettie, good news. We have another family coming. A couple with two grown daughters. Next week. We only have a couple days to prepare.”
Hettie appeared, wiping her hands on her apron. Julia had to repeat her words.
Felicity and Jennifer were called from the garden to hear the good news. John and Tom were off hauling more firewood so they would have to wait to find out.
“When are they coming?” asked Felicity.
“Monday,” replied Julia, her eyes aglow.
“How long will they stay?” asked Jennifer.
“They are a bit undecided. They may stay for two weeks or more—if they like it here.”
Felicity and Jennifer exchanged glances. They loved Calder Springs, but it didn’t have much to offer folks who were used to excitement.
“We must get ready. Hettie, check the pantry. We’ll have to make a trip to Mr. Perry’s store and buy what we need on credit.”
Then Julia had another thought. “Let’s plan the daily menus, Hettie, and only purchase for one day at a time—that way if they leave sooner than expected—” Julia left the sentence unfinished. There was no sense in purchasing supplies and then ending up with no income to pay for them.
Hettie smiled at Julia’s burst of energy. She was glad they were to have guests, but she still secretly wondered how long they could hang on.
“How far did you get with the weeding?” Julia asked the girls.
“There aren’t many weeds,” Felicity replied. “We have been over that garden so often this summer.”
“Then let the rest go. I want you to freshen the three guest rooms. Open the windows wide and turn back the bedding. Do the floors and the dusting and clean the bathroom.”
Felicity was tempted to remind her mother that they had been through the procedure enough times to know what to do, but she held her tongue. Julia was excited. She had to vent her emotions by taking charge.
The girls turned to do as bidden, Felicity chattering to Jennifer as they left.
“I think I’ll run down and tell John,” Julia said to Hettie as she followed her to the kitchen. She removed her uptown slippers and put on the gardening shoes from behind the door. Then she reached for her gardening bonnet and hurried off.
“John! John!” called Julia as soon as she was within earshot. John spun around, afraid something was wrong at home.
Julia quickly dispelled his fears. “Good news,” she called, waving the white envelope.
John walked toward his wife, brushing the sawdust and bits of clinging bark from his shirt as he moved.
“A letter,” called Julia. “We are having more guests.”
She was so excited that John decided to say nothing to dampen her spirit. He knew, however, that it would take many more guests to meet the family’s growing needs. He forced a smile. “When?” he asked.
“Monday!” exclaimed Julia. She was out of breath from hurrying.
“Here, sit down,” John urged her, indicating a fallen log. “Catch your breath—then tell me all about it.”
Julia sat—but she did not wait to catch her breath.
“Next Monday,” she hurried on. “A couple—and two girls—grown girls. They plan on a couple of weeks—but may stay much longer—if they like it. They’ll like it. It’s so—so beautiful here.” Julia let her eyes travel over the scene before her. She gazed at the sweeping valley with the silver curve of the river, the shimmer of the distant lake, the slopes of nearby mountains rising up to join rugged crags and rocky peaks still covered by glacial ice.
John smiled. Jule did love her mountains.
“That’s great!” he responded, trying to make his emotions match his words.
“Isn’t it? I’ve been praying and praying—and here is our answer. Oh, John. This—this venture has been so difficult at times—but it has been a time of—of growing too. I have been shown over and over how God answers prayer. He never lets us down, John. Just when I think we can’t make it any more, He answers my prayer again. And—He’s never late. Though at times I think He’s going to be.”
Julia’s eyes glistened. John turned away to gaze at the distant peaks. His eyes were threatening to spill over as well, but for a different reason.
Oh, God,
he prayed silently,
I wish I had Jule’s faith.
His arm tightened around his wife’s shoulders.
“Well, I must run,” Julia said suddenly, standing swiftly to her feet. “I just wanted you to know about the letter. I left Hettie busy in the kitchen so I’d better get back and lend her a hand.”
“Don’t travel back as fast as you traveled out,” John cautioned.
“Promise,” she whispered. She gave John’s hand a squeeze and started up the path that led home.
A dozen or more were now meeting for weekly worship. John and Julia had talked about moving the group to the church but feared some might drop out if they did. It was less formal—less threatening perhaps—to have the Bible study in the comfort of the Harrigan parlor with coffee and scones served afterward.
Julia had a hard time keeping her thoughts on the lesson John had prepared. They kept shifting to the house guests who would be arriving on the morrow. She needed to tell the neighbors her news, but she wasn’t sure how or where to begin. She must not let them see her excitement. They too needed additional funds to get through another winter. Julia did not want to gloat over her good fortune when their needs were still unmet.
Yet she must speak of it. No stranger got off the train without the whole community knowing of it. It would not do for the Blakeneys to arrive without the townspeople knowing ahead of time. Besides, Tom would need to borrow the Clancy’s buggy.
Julia shifted in her seat and forced her attention back on the lesson.
Forgive me, Lord,
she apologized.
But I am so troubled about this, even though I know I shouldn’t be. Though I might not know how to say what I need to say, I know you will help me when the time comes.
“What do you think Jesus meant by these words?” John was asking the group. Julia flushed, having no idea what words her husband was referring to.
I do hope he doesn’t call on me!
she thought.
Julia was relieved when Mrs. Adams spoke.
“I’ve been sittin’ here, puzzling over them,” she admitted. “But perhaps He means, what we try to keep—try to hang on to—can still slip from us. What we honestly, openly, give to Him, He somehow keeps for us—and might even one day allow us to have back.”
“Isn’t He talking about our lives too?” added Mr. Adams. “If we refuse to give our life to Him, try to hang on to it for our own pleasures and self-seeking, we will eventually lose it. We will have no future with Him in heaven. If we give our life to Him, He cares for us in the way that only He can, and will also reward us with eternal life.”
“I think you are both right,” said Mrs. Shannon. “He’s talking about our lives—but the same principle applies to other things too. We can never hold tight to anything. We haven’t the strength—nor the power to keep it. Nothing—nothing in this life is safe from destruction and decay. Take our town here—our jobs. Even our lives. We can’t save anything by our determination—no matter how we try.”
A feeling of doom was seeping into the room. Julia could feel it. Could sense the fear—the anxiety. She was about to speak when Tom, in his slow, drawling voice came to the rescue.
“But does it matter? I mean—I love this town. I’ve lived most of my life here. But life goes on. Change isn’t always bad. Sometimes change is for our good. Sure, it might sadden us for a time, but if He is in charge—if we really let Him take charge—does it really matter? He is with us wherever we go.”
Julia shifted again. Tom was right. They musn’t fret so. They must develop more faith in the leading of God.
“But how do we know?” asked Mrs. Adams. “How do we know when to trust—to hang on—and when to let go—to move on? I mean, I have prayed and prayed and still don’t know what God wants us to do.”
Julia looked around the group. She could sense that John didn’t want to be the one to answer, and
she
certainly didn’t feel prepared. She was still struggling with the question herself.
It was Hettie who spoke. “Don’t you think,” she said slowly, feeling her way, “that as long as one doesn’t feel—well, compelled to move on, that it isn’t time yet? I mean, don’t you think we’ll know when it’s time—if He decides that we should?” Hettie stopped and fiddled with the worn Bible in her lap. “I’m no speaker—you all know that. I never can say what I want to say, but it seems to me—if we are truly committed to Him—He’ll tell us when to stay put … and when to move on.”
“But what if you sorta feel that it’s time to be movin’?” asked Mrs. Adams.
Julia felt that she must speak. She cleared her throat and looked directly at the woman across from her. “Then—you must,” she said softly. “If you feel that God is urging you—no matter how gently—then you must follow.”
“My Victor has been offered a job,” Mrs. Adams said in little more than a whisper. Victor stirred restlessly in his chair beside her.
“We didn’t want to—to desert the—the rest of you.”
“You won’t be,” John assured the couple. “We would never want to hold you back. If you believe this is God’s answer—for you—if He is providing for your family in this way—then you must go—with our blessing.”
Mr. and Mrs. Adams exchanged glances, both looking relieved.
“And that goes for all of you,” said Julia. “We have banded together to try to help one another—but if any of you feel you must move from Calder Springs—then please—please don’t stay here for the sake of the rest of us. We must all be free to do our own choosing.” There were somber nods and somber faces all around her. Silence ruled for several minutes.
After a while Mrs. Greenwald spoke. “Mr. and Mrs. Adams have been church people for years,” she reminded the group. “They know when God speaks. But what about the rest of us? Like me and—well, I won’t mention any other names, but how do we know when God speaks, when we have never asked for, never looked for, His leading?”