Just a Memory (20 page)

He tapped her new deadbolt on the door. "Lock up tight. I don't want anything to happen to you."

He smiled at her and stepped out the door where he waited until Carolyn had turned the lock before he headed for his cruiser.

He would sleep alone with his principles tonight; but that was better than taking advantage of her when she was most vulnerable. Some might have called him noble, but to Mac it was nothing but kindness and consideration.

Love
was not part of the equation.

The next morning, Mac couldn't believe how great he felt. It had to be the solid block of uninterrupted sleep. The nightmare hadn't returned.

Suddenly the smile on his face melted away. If the nightmare stopped after all these months, it could mean his memory wouldn't return at all. The doctor had said it would probably return within weeks or not at all, and it was well past that point.

Damn. Mac had never wanted to accept the 'not at all' part of the prediction. He absolutely would not.

He jumped out of bed, showered, and dressed in record time and headed straight for Carolyn's house.

"Mac, you're so early," she said, opening the door so he could step in. "I haven't even had breakfast yet."

"Not to worry," he told her, pulling her into his arms and kissing her soundly. "
Mmm
. Peppermint. Will that kiss hold you for a while? We could pick up a fast food breakfast and picnic in the warm car at the park," he proposed. "And then a Sunday afternoon drive following a Sunday picnic brunch. We still haven't covered all the side roads in this area."

She laughed. "Nice plan, even if it's the wrong season for a picnic."

"Would Terri like to join us?"

"She might," Carolyn said. "I'll find out." She made the call next door, but Terri declined the invitation. "Christie got a new computer game and she's more than happy to stay longer and play."

"Then let's go."

Carolyn pulled on her jacket and grabbed her scarf, mittens, and purse. Minutes later their warm breakfasts rested on her lap in a brown bag while two hot coffees sat in the cup holders on the dashboard, filling the car with a delicious aroma as Mac drove to the park.

He marveled at how comfortable they seemed to feel with each other. Maybe it was just that they were unencumbered by the awkwardness of inexperienced youth. After the initial awkwardness while Carolyn became accustomed to his teasing, their conversations were easy and often lively. And their silences passed comfortably.

They were becoming friends. Good friends.

Funny, Carolyn was the first woman Mac had ever had for a good friend. She was certainly the only friend he'd ever wanted to kiss every time he saw her, too.

"I've never had greasy eggs on a muffin that tasted better. Have you?" Mac asked her.

A little of that grease glistened at the corner of her mouth. He reached over with his napkin and wiped it off. Their gazes locked for a few moments. He just had to kiss her.

Mac ended the kiss and straightened. "I guess I should let you finish before it gets cold," he mumbled as he reached for his coffee. He downed a big gulp, wishing it would burn his mouth and return some sense to his head. When he was close to Carolyn, he couldn't keep from touching her. It had about killed him to go home last night instead of taking her to bed.

He wanted to be her friend.

But he wanted more to be her lover.

"There. Ready to go," she told him as she wadded up the thin paper that had been around her breakfast sandwich. She put it with his in the bag and wiped her lips on the small napkin.

Mac looked away to keep himself from staring at her kissable lips and put the car in gear to start backing out. They finished their coffee as they drove. Carolyn proved to be a very good tour guide as she showed him back roads he hadn't known about.

Though the car heater was doing its job, he could tell it had turned colder. "Will you look at that storm coming," he said, leaning forward to peer out the windshield. Dark gray clouds had gathered ominously in the sky.

"Just ahead there's a gravel road leading toward the lake and Outlook Point," Carolyn told him. "The view is really beautiful from there, if you'd like to see it, and then we should probably head back."

Mac pulled onto the road she pointed out. He stopped the car to look at the broken fence where a drooping gate had been pushed back from across the road. "The owners must try to keep people out of here," he concluded. "But with little success from the looks of that gate."

"This is the teenagers'
Lovers Lane
, Mac. The kids come here at night, so I suppose they push it open in the dark when no one notices."

"Nothing can stand in the way of love," he said with a chuckle.

"The road continues down the hill and leads to some cottages along the lake. The owners and their guests use it off and on. Even in the winter, I suppose."

"Well, I don't see a no trespassing sign," Mac said as he steered the car toward the viewing spot and parked, leaving the engine running so the heater would stay on. "You're right about the view." He leaned back with a sigh and raised his arm to the back of the bench seat. "The lake really looks big from up here. Look how it seems to disappear at the horizon."

She nodded.

Mac looked over at Carolyn. "You know, it's been twenty years since I've been on
Lovers Lane
." He dropped his arm to her shoulders and tried to ease her closer to his side. The straps across their chests impeded their progress. "And we didn't use seat belts back then."

They laughed as he undid their seat belts and moved closer. He cuddled her in the curve of his arm. She looked up at him, smiling. He pulled his hand from his glove and raised it to the side of her jaw. He could feel her pulse under his fingertips as her heart sped up. Slowly lowering his lips to hers, he had to work at keeping the kiss soft and tender. The surge in his groin made him ache to make the kiss more. Much more.

His tongue glided along her lips and she opened her mouth to him like a blossoming flower, her tongue meeting his in a bold, timeless dance. When the dance ended, he blazed a path of kisses across her soft cheek down to her neck.

Mac felt her pulse pounding under his lips. His own pumped at a similar pace. He unzipped her jacket and slid his warm hand under the collar onto her shoulder. His fingers curled and returned to her neck to caress her skin along the edge of her open blouse collar above her v-neck sweater. They came to rest over her heart between her breasts, feeling it beat even faster.

Carolyn leaned her head back into the seat as his kisses followed the path his fingers had blazed. Her fingers curled around his neck. He pulled her blouse from the waist of her slacks and his hand sought the warmth and softness of her skin as it moved up under the fabric to capture her breast. Her mouth fell open in a gasp for air. He raised his head to recapture her open mouth. While his hand slipped around the lacy cup to caress the warm softness it contained, his tongue slipped back into her mouth to taste the proffered sweetness.

Though he'd wanted her since their first kiss, he couldn't believe what was happening between them. The more he was with her, the more time he wanted to spend with her. The more he touched her, the more he wanted to hold her.

How could the closeness they shared feel so good? So absolutely
right?

A sound from outside the car set off an alarm in his head. Mac raised his mouth from hers. He glanced up the road. "Someone is coming. I can hear the crunch of their tires on the gravel."

Seeing the immediate panic in her eyes made him wince. He decided making light of it might make the awkwardness pass. "It wouldn't do to have the Chief of Police caught on
Lovers Lane
, necking with one of Lakehaven's most upstanding citizens, would it?"

She paled instantly. Damn, that had been the wrong thing to say. She worked rapidly to straighten her clothes.

Mac backed the car up and moved to the far side of the cleared area, as far from the road as he could get. He didn't want the occupants of the other car to see him there with Carolyn in case they knew her. It was a small town after all. The least he could do was protect her from that kind of talk.
Another reason we should be just friends.

He ran a hand through his hair and watched a gray sedan go down the hill past the overlook turn.

"It must be one of the cottage owners. Maybe he's going down to check on it because it's starting to snow," Carolyn offered. She sounded a little shaken, but at least she was making normal conversation, talking about the weather. "That sure is a popular kind of car. I've seen several of them in town," she added.

Mac glanced back to see what kind it was, but the car had disappeared down the hill. He dipped his head to glance up at the wide expanse of darkening sky. "Looks like the snow means to keep on falling for a while."

Carolyn nodded, but couldn't look at Mac. Her mind had snapped painfully back to reality with the approach of the other car. She felt as mortified as if she'd been a teenager caught necking on the couch when her mother came into the room. From the heat she felt, she knew her cheeks had to be as bright red as her sweater.

A minute ago she couldn't believe how wonderful she'd felt, and now she couldn't believe she had actually been necking in a car on
Lovers Lane
. She fastened her seatbelt, hunched her shoulders forward, and pulled her jacket collar up to cover as much of her face as possible.

She still didn't dare glance at the big man beside her. What must he think of her? He was so in control all the time. She hardly remembered where she was, and yet he'd heard the car coming and stopped their kiss. If it had been left to her to notice, the other car could have pulled up next to them and beeped its horn before she would have heard it. In her jelly-like state, she might never have known.

As they pulled out and headed back toward Lakehaven, the snow got heavier very quickly. The big flakes hitting the pavement seemed to melt at first, but then began to stick as the freezing air temperature froze the melted snow. By the time they neared Carolyn's house, the roads were icy. The windshield wipers were struggling to clear the giant flakes of heavy wet snow.

"Good thing you don't live at the top of a steep hill. We might never make it, even with my four-wheel drive."

In her driveway, Carolyn popped open her seatbelt and reached for her purse. "If you hurry, you can get home before the road gets any worse." She looked up at him to see the surprised look on his face. She didn't want to leave either…but she had to. She leaned over and kissed him briefly. "Thanks, Mac. This was fun." Then she was out the door and running through the snow to her stoop. She hadn't dared stay in the car kissing him for a moment longer.

Carolyn knew Mac expected to be invited in, but she had to think and she
couldn't
think when he was so near. She'd just behaved in a very uncharacteristic way–necking on
Lovers Lane
.

No, not merely uncharacteristic. Crazy.

She needed some time by herself to think about the effect this man was having on her. It was like nothing she'd ever felt with a man before.

Not even with Richard.

Not even once.

Harry had pulled right by Mac's car at
Lovers Lane
. He cursed himself for getting so close, and hoped Mac had paid no attention to the nondescript gray sedan. Now he was spinning his wheels and sliding left and right, trying to make it back up the hill from the lake. He'd waited at the bottom of the incline too long, but he had wanted to be sure Mac had driven away before he steered back up the hill. He couldn't take a chance at being recognized.