Just Like Me (8 page)

“Will you guys just shut up?” Avery yelled. “Becca and I've been coming to Camp Little Big Woods for
four
years, and we've never had to work in the dish room. If you guys would all just stop fighting, maybe we wouldn't be scrubbing pots and pans for Sarge Marge while everyone else is out at the sunset hike.”

“Oh who
cares
about a sunset hike,” Vanessa said. “It sounds
stupid
anyway. Besides, it's all your Chinese sister's fault. We wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for her stupid missing scrap of yarn.”

I squeezed the Brillo pad I had in my hand. I wished it were Vanessa's head. I was
so
sick of her.

“The sunset hike is
not
stupid. Especially not tonight. It's the summer solstice. The sunset will be remarkable,” Avery said. “Although, technically, it will not necessarily be any different than any other sunset. But, technically, every sunset is a one-of-a-kind experience. Somewhat like a snowflake is a one-of-a-kind—”

“Technically, Avery,” Vanessa interrupted, “you're driving me and everyone else crazy in a one-of-a-kind kind of way!”

“Forget the sunset hike
.
I really wanted to win those first
-
place T-shirts!” Becca yelled.

“T-shirts? You can kiss those T-shirts good-bye. We never had a chance,” Vanessa said. “This team stinks.” Then she looked at Gina and said, “Well, certain people do.”

I squeezed the Brillo pad even harder.

I really wished I could hold Vanessa's head under the soapy water just long enough so that she'd have to taste soap. At least Meredith was smart enough to keep her mouth shut for a change, but I knew she was thinking the same thing as Vanessa. She always was. It's the only thing she was capable of.

After Sarge Marge had marched us down to the mess hall from our cabin, following the
big
fight, she'd put each of us at a different table. We sat there not talking, not doing anything until it was dinnertime.

At dinner, she made each of us sit and eat with a different cabin. Some of the girls from the other cabins knew we were in big trouble, so they whispered and giggled to each other about us. Now that dinner was over, it was our job to wash all the dishes in the dish room before we headed back up the hill to our cabin for lights-out.

It felt like we were in the worst trouble that any campers in the history of Camp Little Big Woods had ever been in.

“I really didn't know it was possible to be
so
clumsy in
so
many ways,” Vanessa said, looking at Gina.

“Yeah, well, I didn't know it was possible to be
so
mean
and
such a sore loser,” Gina said.

“C'mon, you guys,” Avery said, sounding exasperated. “Let's just get these dishes done so we can get out of here.”

“Do you
see
all these dishes?” Vanessa asked. “We're
never
going to get out of here!”

Dirty pots, pans, cookie sheets, and serving trays covered every inch of the industrial-sized kitchen counters. It
did
look like we'd never finish.

“Just be quiet and wash something, would you?” Gina snapped.

So we all grabbed something and scrubbed, and the dish room was quiet for a few minutes except for the clanking of the pots and pans against the metal sinks and the sloshing of the water as we washed.

I rubbed the Brillo pad against the cookie sheet I was holding underwater in the sink. The harder I scrubbed, the madder I got, and the madder I got, the harder I scrubbed. I scrubbed so hard that the water got away from me. It sloshed out of the sink and splashed Vanessa's T-shirt and got her wet.

“You little…” she said as she pulled her arm back, getting ready to throw a sponge at me.

“Don't you dare!” I warned.

My tone of voice surprised me. Yesterday I would never have stood up to Vanessa like this, but now that she'd messed with something that was important to me, I wasn't going to stand around so quietly anymore.

“Or what?” Vanessa taunted.

I grabbed the spray nozzle on the faucet and pointed it at her.

“You wouldn't dare,” she said.

But then, I squeezed the trigger.

As the water sprayed out, straight toward Vanessa's face, I screamed. And the chaos began.

I sprayed. Vanessa threw her sponge, and then she splashed soapy sink water right in my face. Meredith dumped a tub of rinse water down my back while Vanessa tried to pry the spray nozzle out of my hands. But I wouldn't let go. Water sprayed everywhere as we fought over it. The dish room was turning into a water park.

Becca grabbed another spray nozzle from the other sink and moved it back and forth like she was waving a sparkler on the Fourth of July.

Vanessa turned around to see why she was getting so wet, and Becca sprayed her right in the face, so Vanessa lunged at Becca and fought to get that nozzle away from her.

I dropped my spray nozzle, scooped up some water with an empty pitcher, and dumped it down the back of Vanessa's T-shirt. She and Becca continued their struggle, while Meredith grabbed the spray nozzle I had dropped and sprayed it straight at me.

Avery and Gina joined the fight too. They ripped off sheets of paper towel, dunked them in water, squished them into tight balls, and threw them at Vanessa and Meredith. So while we splashed, sprayed, and screamed, Vanessa and Meredith dashed, ducked, and dodged.

I was so mad about everything. Everyone was, and we fought like our lives depended on it.

But then Vanessa tried to dodge one of Gina's soggy snowballs, and she slipped on the soapy sponge she'd thrown at me. She went flying all the way across the room on her butt, knocking over an entire shelf of plastic mugs. And the only thing louder than all those mugs clattering to the floor was the explosion of our laughter.

Our fight continued. But now we laughed. We giggled. We squealed. We slipped and slid on the slippery wet floor while we splashed and soaked each other from head to toe. Our laughter energized us more than our anger had, and I didn't know which was more fun—drenching someone else or getting drenched myself. Water, soapsuds, and paper towel snowballs were everywhere.

“Let's tell DDDJ we have a new event for the camp competition,” Gina said. “Bobsled butt sliding!”

We all roared. All except Vanessa. She scrunched up some nearby paper towels and nailed Gina right in the stomach. But even though she acted mad, we knew she thought her slip-and-slide move was beyond hilarious. The only thing funnier was the big wet spot on her butt.

“You should talk, Gina,” Vanessa taunted. “You couldn't hit the bull's-eye on a target if it was as big as a barn.”

Gina reached down and picked up the paper towel snowball Vanessa had just thrown at her. It was floating at her feet. She squeezed out the water, pulled her arm back, and let it fly straight for Vanessa's head. Vanessa ducked in plenty of time, but the snowball hit someone else.

“
What! Is! Going! On?!
” Sarge Marge bellowed as she wiped the wet paper towel off her cheek.

It had somehow managed to stick there, and then it fell to the floor with a splash.

Sarge Marge looked around the dish room in silence. As she surveyed the damage in those quiet seconds that followed the water park mania, all we could hear was
drip
,
plip
,
drip
,
plip
as water dripped from every surface of the dish room—including all of us—onto the floor, which now looked like the shallow end of a swimming pool.

It was as if all of our anger and frustration really had been a fire, and we had found a way to put it out. Now we were standing in the aftermath.

Sarge Marge said in a very calm but stern, matter-of-fact way, “You ladies have ventured into a land far beyond trouble. In fact, you're so far beyond trouble that you can't even
see
trouble anymore.”

None of us had any idea what that meant, so we just stood there dripping, panting, and staring at her.

“Find a way to wipe it up, dry it up, and clean it up. I don't care how you do it, and I don't care how long it takes you.”

She put her hands on her hips and continued. “Once you're finished, find me in the bulldog chair, and I'll tell you what your real punishment is.”

She turned on her heels in her usual military fashion and walked out of the dish room and the mess hall, letting the screen door bang behind her.

We all stood like melting statues as the water continued to drip off every part of us. No one talked. No one moved. No one even breathed until Gina said, “Did you see how that paper towel actually stuck to her face? That was hysterical! What a rumper bumper!”

And all of us burst out laughing. And we…could…not…stop.

“Did you see the look on her face?” Meredith asked.

“And what was that ominous warning that we're beyond the land of trouble? What was she talking about?” Vanessa added.

“She's beyond the land of
craz
y
!” Becca yelled.

“Technically, I think the term is ‘insane'!” Avery exclaimed.

I laughed so hard that I finally had to sit on the floor and lean against the cupboard, holding my stomach. There was so much water on the floor that I felt like I was sitting in the shallow end of Lake Little Big Woods. When I looked up and saw our whole cabin laughing together, I realized it was the first time this had happened. The first time we actually were all having fun. Together. Too bad it had to be when we were in the biggest trouble of our lives!

• • •

Having a water fight and cleaning up after one are two totally different things, and one is a lot more fun than the other. There weren't enough dish towels to wipe up the water. That was for sure! And Gina and Avery had used up most of the paper towels as “snowballs.” But “technically,” as Avery said, even if the Bounty guy from the TV commercial had been there to help us with his unlimited supply of superabsorbent paper towels, there still wouldn't have been enough to clean up the mess we'd made.

We ended up opening the back door of the dish room and using cookie sheets sort of as squeegees to push the water out the door. It was actually Avery's idea. She explained scientifically why this would be the best way to get the water out, something about displacing the water instead of trying to dry it with foreign materials. We were thankful for Avery's idea, but we didn't really need to know the scientific reason behind why it worked. The only downside was that we had to bend over the whole time while we were scraping the cookie sheets along the floor.

Since we were all bent over, Gina cackled, sounding like the Wicked Witch of the West, “This'll teach you, my pretties.”

We all laughed a little, but things weren't as funny as they had been earlier because we were all getting tired.

“Technically, this is quite a bit of stress on our lower backs,” Avery said, standing up and stretching. “It could lead to possible permanent chronic injuries for all of us.”

We all stopped, stood up, and stared at Avery.

“Avery, the only thing that's going to have permanent chronic damage is all of our ears from having to listen to you act like you're a walking, talking version of Wikipedia,” Vanessa said.

If Vanessa had said this an hour earlier, I would've been so mad at her, but after the water fight and all the laughing and Gina cackling like a witch, Vanessa's comment made all of us laugh. Even Avery.

“I can't help my intelligence,” Avery said, sticking her nose in the air like she was the Queen of England or something.

“Yeah, but you can stop telling us every un-useful intelligent fact that pops into your head,” Vanessa said, laughing. “And then elaborating on it for the next ten minutes.”

“I do not do that!” Avery said, acting like she was thinking about getting mad.

“Yes, you do,” Gina said in her regular voice, not the cackling witch one.

Avery looked at Becca and me.

“You do,” we both said together.

“But, just to be fair,” Gina said before anyone else could say anything, “Vanessa, you could stop yelling at everyone for
everything
.”

Vanessa didn't even argue. She knew Gina was right.

“You too,” Gina said, looking at Meredith.

“What did I do to get dragged into this?” Meredith asked.

“You agree with everything Vanessa says, even if it's not nice,” Gina said.

“I do not!” Meredith said.

“Yes you do!” Becca and I both said.

“Hmph,” Meredith said, bending over again.

“Well, if we're being fair, Gina,” Avery said, “you could stop goofing around during the team competitions, like in the Newcomb tournament the other day.”

“Hey, I can't help it that the Bermuda Triangle over there were being ball hogs,” Gina said. “Of course I'm going to joke about that.”

“Yeah, well, what about the soccer game today?” Avery asked. “Red Maple scored because
you
were joking around.”

“You're right,” Gina said, sounding sorry. “But I didn't really
plan
on letting the other team score. I was just trying to be funny.”

“Exactly,” Avery said. “And it wasn't the right time for it.”

“And, Becca…” Avery continued.

“I know. I know,” Becca said. “I need to take it down a notch sometimes.”

“Sometimes?” Avery asked, raising her eyebrows.

“Okay, most times,” Becca said. “It's just that Vanessa brings out the best of my competitive edge.”

She and Vanessa high-fived with their cookie sheets.

I kept my head down and pushed more water out the door, hoping no one would realize that I was the only one we hadn't talked about yet. After all the speaking up for myself tonight, I was ready to go back to taking the quiet road.