Just This Once, Contemporary Romance (Last Frontier Lodge #3) (4 page)

No matter how flustered Aidan made her, she’d rather he be the last man she kissed than Kyle. Her belly fluttered and her pulse quickened just thinking about those few moments in his car. He’d set her on fire and made her forget herself. She jumped when there was a knock at the door. She hurried to the door. Swinging it open, her breath caught when she saw Aidan. In the soft afternoon light, he stood there in his tall, dark, sexy-as-hell glory. He wore jeans and a black t-shirt with a leather jacket. Her eyes traveled up his body, pure muscle every inch of the way. Though his days as a Navy SEAL had been over for a few years, he maintained his impeccable physical condition. His almost-black hair curled at the edges of his jacket collar. His blue eyes stood out against the contrast of his dark hair. His mouth hitched up on one side.

“I called, but you didn’t answer. Decided I’d just stop by.”

“Oh, I…” As she started to speak, she realized she had no idea where she’d left her phone. Between last night and sleeping in, she was all out of whack. Her usual days were nothing more than work, work and more work. She appeared to lose the ability to keep track of simple things when her schedule was thrown off track. She met Aidan’s gaze with a rueful smile. “I don’t know where I left my phone. Come on in while I try to find it.”

She stepped back. Aidan followed her inside and quietly closed the door. Having him near instantly sent desire sliding through her veins. Her belly clenched, butterflies amassing within. She took a breath and hurried down the hall to the guest room, calling over her shoulder for him to have a seat as she did. She found her phone where she must have left it early this morning when she tumbled into bed. It sat beside her purse in a jumble on the dresser. Aidan’s number scrolled on the screen as a missed call. She started to rush back down the hall, but paused at the door and turned back into the bathroom.

She eyed her reflection in the mirror. She quickly ran a brush through her hair and dug through her small bag to see if she’d remembered to bring her contacts. She’d tossed the single contact left last night after one had fallen out in the shower and washed down the drain. Of course, she hadn’t bothered to bring extra contacts, so she cleaned her glasses and put them on with a sigh. She hated that she wanted to look as good as she could, but she did. A quick swipe of lip gloss and she headed down the hallway.

Aidan stood by the windows, turning when she entered the living room. She held her phone up. “I forgot all about it.”

He shrugged. “Your parents around?”

She couldn’t help it, but she felt a tiny sense of relief her parents weren’t here. She was having enough trouble managing her feelings without her too-observant parents present. “They’re out running errands this afternoon and then they have a fundraiser tonight.”

He nodded. “Think they’ll be around tomorrow when I come by to pick you up?”

“They should be.”

“Good. Like to at least say hello whenever I’m around.”

“They’d like that.”

Becca knew Aidan’s parents were both gone. He was close to his sister and was considered family by hers. He often checked in on her parents when he was in Bellingham. Another thing she liked about him.

The room was quiet around them. She started to feel nervous. Aidan made her nervous all on his own, but after last night, she was worse off than usual. Meanwhile, her body had its own ideas. Liquid heat swirled in her center, and her pulse ran wild.

“It’s a little early, but I thought maybe we could get dinner.” Aidan’s voice was low. She felt the sound of it echo inside her body.

She looked up at him and scrambled to gather herself. One look at him left her dry mouthed and nearly quivering inside. She finally managed a nod. “Okay.”

He appeared to be about to say something else, but he stopped himself and nodded quickly. “I’m ready whenever you are then. Any preferences?”

“My mom says there’s a new pizza place downtown. I think it’s called B’s Pizza.”

“Sounds perfect.”

***

Aidan looked across the table at Becca. They’d found B’s Pizza just beyond downtown Bellingham in an old renovated factory. The owners had turned the industrial style building into a warm, colorful space with bright paintings and walls of windows replacing the old garage style doors. They’d wisely carpeted the floor, otherwise the space would have felt cavernous and noisy. Becca sat across from him, tracing her fingertip around the edge of her wineglass while they waited for their pizza to arrive.

He’d come up with a ramshackle plan on his drive over to her parents’ house. No matter what, he wasn’t going to try to talk about their kiss, or what he said last night. That was the extent of his plan. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk about it, but more that he knew Becca well enough to know there was a high likelihood her defenses would fly up if he gave them a chance. He was far from an expert on matters of the heart, but he had enough sense to know thinking it to death wouldn’t help. Becca loved to ponder and process. It was one of the characteristics he respected in her. She was a damn good lawyer, in large part because she took the time to know the facts and argue a good case. He just didn’t think now was the time to encourage her to ponder and process.

If he was being truthful, a corner of him worried she didn’t share his depth of feelings. He sensed there was a kernel of possibility inside of her, but he didn’t know, and he wasn’t ready to find out just yet. In that vein, he behaved as if nothing had happened last night. Though it was definitely out of the ordinary for him and Becca to be having dinner alone together. Oh, he’d spent many, many dinners with her, but they were always surrounded by family and friends.

Now, he had to find a way to keep it casual. Once they sat down, he found it surprisingly easy to talk with Becca. There was plenty of ground to cover between discussing her family and work. It was impossible to avoid the topic of her twin brother Garrett turning his life on its head.

“Seriously, I’m glad Garrett cut way back on the corporate bullshit, but I still can’t quite believe he’s living in Alaska now. I can’t believe how he is with Delia’s son. Before this, if I’d suggested to Garrett he might fall in love with a single mother, he’d have looked at me like I was psychotic. Not because he had a problem with single mothers, but because his life didn’t leave any room for anything.” Becca paused and took a swallow of wine, smiling softly. “I’m so happy for him though. He looks happier than he has in years. I never thought the whole corporate law thing was his gig, but he took it on like it was.”

Aidan considered the way Garrett looked when he last saw him. Aidan had seen him a few times when Garrett had been back to Seattle. Most memorable was when Aidan had encountered him at a restaurant with Delia, his new love. Garrett carried himself with an easiness Aidan had never seen. The tight lines bracketing his face were gone. When his eyes had landed on Delia, Aidan had felt like he was intruding—the look in Garrett’s eyes was so intimate. Aidan glanced across the table at Becca. His mind flashed to the feel of her lips under his. He forced his brain to the present and nodded. “When I saw him last month, can’t say I’ve ever seen him look so relaxed. Good for him is all I’ve got to say about it.”

Becca smiled softly. “Definitely.” Her smile wavered, and she shook her head sharply. “So what did you think of Diamond Creek?”

Aidan had gone up to Alaska for Garrett and Delia’s wedding last month. He’d meant to get up and visit Gage over the winter, but time got away from him. “It was more amazing that I expected. The views…wow. Those long summer days are something. It felt like the days never ended.”

Becca grinned. “When the sun doesn’t go down until after midnight, technically the days don’t end because the next one starts first.” Her gaze sobered quickly, and she took a big gulp of wine before pinning her eyes to him.

His pulse pounded through his veins. He didn’t know what Becca was about to say, but his body was on high alert.

“So…you said something last night.”

Oh hell. She wanted to talk about it. His whole plan, which really wasn’t much of a plan, was to avoid this. He took a breath and rolled his shoulders. “So I did.”

‘What did you mean when you said you wanted to kiss me for too damn long?”

Becca’s blue eyes were guarded, but in their depths was that glimmer of uncertainty she tried so damn hard to hide. Aidan was winging it here, but he wasn’t going to lie. If all he had to offer was the truth, then that’s what he would give her.

“I meant exactly that.”

She took another gulp of wine and twirled a lock of hair around her finger—that silky brown hair he wanted to run his fingers through. She bit her lip and looked away, her teeth denting her soft, full bottom lip. Lust jolted through him.
Damn. He was in trouble. Serious trouble.
He’d had such a firm grip on the reins of his desire for so long he’d forgotten he’d been barely holding it back. He couldn’t have realized how much it would test his control to give in and kiss her. When she looked back at him, her eyes were considering.

“I have an idea, but I don’t know what you’re going to think.”

He hadn’t a clue where she was headed, but he couldn’t stop the path of this conversation. “Hard to know what I might think unless you tell me what your idea is.”

She took another gulp of wine and squared her shoulders. “You know what happened with Kyle?”

He bit back the snarl of anger that rose within him and nodded slowly. “Your ex, right?”

She nodded, her eyes wary. “So you know I caught him with my friend two days before our wedding?”

No, he had most definitely
not
known that because if he had, he’d have tracked Kyle down and beat the living shit out of him. It had been bad enough to know Kyle had dumped her two days before their wedding. How any man could do that to Becca was beyond Aidan. She must have caught his expression because she groaned and put her hand over her eyes.

“Oh God. I thought for sure you would have heard that sordid detail.” She paused for another swallow of wine and brushed her hair out of her eyes. Her mouth curled in a bitter half-smile. “The only reason everyone heard he dumped me was because I was so shocked, I just stood there. Technically, he did dump me before I had a chance to dump him. I couldn’t bring myself to tell too many people what really happened because it’s so cliché and embarrassing. My fiancée was actually getting a blowjob from one of my bridesmaids. That’s the kind of thing that’s supposed to be a joke.”

Cold anger knotted inside. Aidan was beyond disgusted at Kyle. On the heels of that came a deep vicarious pain. He supposed it was a good thing he hadn’t known what Kyle had done to Becca because he could have hardly stood to witness her pain and know how she must have felt at the time. He looked across the table and saw the embarrassment she was trying to shield. He held her gaze. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Kyle’s the one who should be embarrassed.” His words came out low, his anger rising to the surface.

Becca shrugged. “I know, but it still sucks. Anyway, I didn’t want this to be a woe-is-me thing. The thing is…Kyle’s the last man I was with. I hadn’t really thought about that until last night.”

Uncertain where she was going with this, he nodded.

“Since you were honest with me, I’ll be honest with you. I’ve wanted to kiss you for a while too.”

Aidan was relieved he wasn’t the chattiest guy because his capacity for speech deserted him entirely. Oh, he’d hoped. He’d hoped like hell that what he felt when he kissed Becca last night was what he’d sensed. But to hear her say aloud she’d wanted to kiss him, well that sent lust surging through him. He took a long drag of beer to mask his silence and nodded for her to continue.

She twirled that lock of hair around her finger again and bit her lip. She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “The thing is, I don’t want Kyle to hold the honors anymore, but I don’t want to try to date. I hate dating.” She almost spit the word out, and Aidan bit back his smile. Her eyes held his, uncertainty blinking behind the brave veneer of hers. “I thought maybe we could…” She stopped, her face flushing.

He stared at her and tried to make sense of what she was saying. If it was what he thought, he might lose his hold on sanity, which was difficult enough to cling to whenever Becca was near. “Maybe we could…?”

Still flushing, she took another gulp of wine. “How do I say this?” she muttered to herself. She looked over at him, and he felt as if her eyes had ahold of his heart. “I don’t want Kyle to be the last man I was with anymore. I thought maybe if you wanted to kiss me, and I wanted to kiss you, then maybe you might want something more. You probably think I’m crazy, but…” Her words ran out, and she kept twirling her hair.

He kept staring at her, his mind racing. If he understood, Becca, the woman he’d fantasized about for years, was flat out asking him to do a lot more than kiss her. There was absolutely no way he could say no. Yet, a part of him was torn. He didn’t want to simply be the man who became the newest memory for Becca. Beyond desire, he wanted her—in every way. He’d loved her from afar and kept his distance and had resigned himself he may wait forever. So, he’d have to play his cards very, very carefully. Much as he didn’t know if he had the discipline to do it, he might have to persuade Becca to delay her request.

Becca started to stand. “Okay, obviously you think I’m out of my mind and you’re too polite to say so. I’ll just…”

He reached over and wrapped his hand around her wrist. Her eyes slammed into his, wide and vulnerable. “I don’t think you’re out of your mind.”

She slowly sat back down. He didn’t release her wrist, but eased his grip. He could feel the beat of her pulse under the soft skin and stroked his thumb across it. “An ass like that shouldn’t be the last man who touched you. Thing is, I think it might be best if we take this slow.”

Her pulse leapt under his thumb. Her blue eyes were bright and tinged with anticipation. Her cheeks were flushed. Watching her was like watching clouds pass. One moment, her eyes were open, the next they were shuttered. She was quiet for so long, Aidan started to get worried. Suddenly, she shook her head, her eyes determined. “I can’t go slow. If we’re going to do this, we have to just do it.”