Kasadya (Hellhound Awakened) (16 page)

We walked outside the room and then the doors closed behind us, on their own of course. Vulcan offered me his hand, his face still angry, so I just took it to get this over with. We shifted into a room with just one bed, no widows, and a small bathroom, and he let go of my hand and shifted out again; leaving me alone in my new found home. Well, better get use to it.

I walked over to the bed and planted myself on it, bending my head to my hands and watched the floor again. They are so pissed at me. Chax refused to even look at me, and I must admit that was really getting to me. Don’t know why, it’s not like he is my favorite person here. Maybe because I tried to prove myself to him and only ended up proving him right. Yip, that must be it.

The look on my dad’s face had the tears streaming from my eyes and over my cheeks; he was so disappointed in me. The air shifted, and still crying I refused to look. A pair of black boots came into view, followed by my suitcases.

“I asked Nanini and Lada to pack up your things for you. They ensured me that everything is here. I will bring you some food and refreshments in a while, it will give you enough time to unpack,” Vulcan said, and at the last word shifted out.

Well at least I had my stuff to keep me company, but I made no effort to get up and unpack. I just sat there remembering the whole day. About half an hour later a knock sounded at the door. I lifted my head and looked at it. I’m so not in the mood for this anymore. Another knock sounded, followed by Vulcan’s voice, “Can I come in?” Yip no luck for “leave me alone”.

“Yes,” I replied, and looked back at the floor.

He opened the door and walked in, closing it behind him, scared I’ll try to run? “I have brought some food and refreshment. Seeing that it’s already late, we will all retire for the night. Good night,” he finished, placing my food next to me on the bed then walked out, locking the door behind him. I wonder if shifting is possible? Na, don’t think so, they would have blocked me or something. I looked at the food and decided to eat, needing to keep my strength up. A few bites later I placed it on the small table in the corner, not very hungry.

I walked over to the suitcases and picked one up, placing it on the bed to start unpacking. No use in delaying the matter; I’m here for a whole month. I placed the first pair of jeans in the small closet next to the bed. Yip, all luxury gone with the punishment. “
Oh Kas, shut up and get on with it
,” I scolded myself. I repeated the movement and soon my suitcases were unpacked, and I was looking at an empty one.

My dirty clothes are still not back from the laundry, which by the way was also another secret I wanted to find out. I just hope it reaches me here, wherever here may be. I had kept my pj’s on the bed and now took them with my bath goodies to go take a shower. I stopped at the mirror and placed them on a small bench and then looked up to see myself in the mirror, taking a step back from the sight.

I was covered in blood, my face, t-shirt and everything. I remember hitting Marcus in the nose and how his blood sprayed over me. No wonder Lada and the rest backed away. Not only were my hands covered with his blood, but my whole face and clothes too. Just look at the sight of me, I looked like ... Like a monster.

Is that what I have become, a monster? Someone that took pleasure in hurting others? My throat started burning again from the tears I was trying to keep back, but I gave in and let them run freely. I felt so bad; indescribable emotions ran through me. Still crying I turned on the shower, got undressed, and stepped in the water. Freezing cold started to turn slowly into warm water; I didn’t even flinch, too shaken.

I looked down to see the water below red from Marcus’s blood. I opened up my heartache and let it flow with the water, trying to wash away my awful day. After a long time the water started running cold again, so I sucked up the tears and finished off. I toweled down the water on me and got into my pj’s then walked over to the bed. I was exhausted, from fear to adrenalin back to fear and now finished it off with tears.

I climbed into bed and drew the covers over me, hoping to hell I could fall asleep and try to escape this day. Luck finally came to me. After a few minutes I was pulled into a dream, and for once it started pretty good.

I was walking in a beautiful garden, fountains and flowers greeted me all the way. I looked down to see that I was wearing some kind of red dress. I don’t do dresses, so this is really weird and I started to feel uncomfortable. Why on earth would I make up a dream where I wear such a stupid thing? From the very first moment my mom forced me into one I felt as if it was demeaning to me; breaking me down into something I wasn’t.

I only kept them on for a short while, the moment she turned her back long enough, I would have created an oops with it, always making sure it never ends up on me again. Of course my mother always went ballistic afterwards. Telling me that I should start thinking about my future, and that being a lady was honorable and to take pride in it. Well it never worked, still hate the damn things.

“Come, hellhound, our feast awaits,” a guy said, and I looked up to find my demon standing there dressed in a black Armani suit with a red shirt beneath. Oh for crying out loud! Why does he always have to spoil my dreams?

“Go to hell, demon,” I replied and turned around, ready to run in this stupid thing I was wearing.

“Wait! I only wish to dine with you. I believe your day already had enough excitement,” he said and I stopped; standing there contemplating on what to do.

Should I turn around and dine with him? Or should I turn around, dream up a pair of swords and get him the hell out of my life? No, I did enough of that for the day, no more, this is my dream right? So I just need to out dream him. Let’s give this a go, maybe I can get rid of him in that way. So I turned around and faced him
.
“Why?” I asked, watching him carefully. No way in hell do I trust this demon.

“Please, I promise that this will be a proper dinner with no intentions,” he replied, gesturing to his left. I followed his hand and found a table at a fountain, flowerbeds circling it. It had two plates filled with food, and candles to add to it.

“If you try anything demon, you’ll regret it,” I said, turning my eyes back to him. He lifted his hands in a surrender gesture and stepped aside for me to pass him. I walked passed him slowly, all the while watching him, then walked over to the table and sat down, my eyes still on him. He joined me at the table and poured red wine into one of the wine glasses standing on the table, then the second glass. Placing the bottle of wine back on the table he handed me a glass. I’ve never had wine before, too young for that sort of thing, so I took it; might as well try it and see what happens.

“You’re wrong,” he said, taking a sip from his wine looking at me. I slowly brought my glass to my mouth and took a sip. With my eyes on him, I tasted the wine. Well not too bad I must admit, pretty nice.

“And what would I be wrong about?” I asked him, taking the glass away from my mouth and rolling the taste of the wine in my mouth. I wonder what type of wine it is?

“You’re not a monster; the werewolf got what he deserved,” he replied, taking another sip.

“How would you know about him?” I asked him, trying to find out how the hell he knows what goes on in my life if he only visits me in my dreams.

“My little hellhound, I know everything about you. Your mind is free for me to explore, and I do so with much interest,” he answered, a smile taking place at the last words.

“How?”

“That, little hellhound, is a secret. But enough about that. The werewolf touched you without permission. Your love and
Custos
saw it and only stood by, doing nothing to protect your honor. You had the right to defend it.”

“Yes well, I could have picked another way, my choice was bad. I could have hurt him badly, and in return I may have lost the only friends I ever had,” I replied, taking my eyes off him. My throat was starting to burn again. No way am I crying in front of him, so I bit them back, locking my jaws.

“I believe a true friend would have understood, and in fact supported you on this. Why did your love and
Custos
not help you, why leave you in the arms of such a male?”

I sat there thinking about it for a while. He might be right. If they all saw what was happening, why did no one help? If Nanini and Lada saw what he was doing, why would they judge me? Was this one of Chax’s training things? If it was, it sucked big time. I have no problem with a punch or kick or that kind of stuff, but grabbing me and telling me stuff like Marcus did was a little disgusting.

“If you were in my care, I would have taken his head for that. I would have kept you safe from such things, but if I did, you would not have found your true self today,” he went on, gesturing to the plate of food in front of me.

It was a small steak, rice, and greens and yeah it looked tasty. So I picked up a fork and scooped up a bite then looked at him
.
“What do you mean my true self; you mean the monster I became?” I asked, taking the bite.

“Are you sure it was a monster? What was the first thing your parents told you about yourself, was it not that you are a hellhound born?”

Now that caught my attention. What’s he saying? That a hellhound is a born monster? No way! I’m not a monster. Okay yes I lost control today and made a bad decision, but that was just today
.
“I was not born to be a monster,” I threw back at him, pissed off instantly.

“No, not a monster, but were you not born to be the best of all fallen? Is it not in your nature to concur? Your
Custos
has only scratched the surface of what you are destined to be, and many hellhounds don’t live up to it. As far as we know no hellhound has ever again reached that divined destiny; all too afraid to take their true nature and embrace it. Imagine how many of us they could have destroyed if they did. Are you sure that your
Custos
is not trying to tame you in a way?”

What? “What do you mean?”

“Are you sure he isn’t holding you back, because they are afraid of you?”

Where the hell did he get that? No way, Chax pushed me too hard every time, he wanted me to become a warrior.

“Yes, but what happened today when you became one? Did he not ask you to stand down, and let him fight for you, why would he do that?”

Did he just read my freaking mind? How in the hell did he do that? But something in his words triggered the conversation I had in Chax’s garden. Yes, he did ask me to back down and let him take care of the problem. Why would he teach me to fight, and then ask me to let him deal with it? My mind started to run all over the place. I remember the training, Chax’s words, and everything. Confused as hell I sat there thinking about it.

“Dawn’s approaching, my little hellhound, so I leave you with my final question. In a war, would you not use your greatest weapon to win?” he said, and at the last word he started to fade away. I woke up in my bed looking into darkness.

Chapter 11

I lay there in my bed, the demon’s questions running through my mind. I was trying to find reasonable answers for them, but I couldn’t. Looking around I could see the room had started to lighten up from the sun rising, not like there’s a window to help here, not even a clock.

I got up and went to the closet, grabbing a pair of jeans, a black t-shirt, and boots; learned another lesson yesterday, then walked to the bathroom. A wake up shower is just what I need. I got undressed and got into the shower; warm water greeted me this time.

Washing, I thought about the demon’s question again. He was right; in a war like this I would use my greatest weapon, anyone would. Then why would the fallen not? What do we become if we fully embrace our true destiny, will I be like a demon? With all my questions and reasons I got out of the shower and got dressed, I walked back to the bed and planted myself on it, waiting.

After a long while, a knock sounded at my door. I looked up and knew it would be either Vulcan or Chax so let’s get over with. “Yes,” I answered, standing up and walking to the door. It clicked open and then was pushed inwards toward me, revealing Vulcan
.

“Come, your breakfast awaits,” he said and gestured for me to follow him. I took the hint and walked behind him. He led me through many hallways and finally we came into a familiar one; the one leading to the grub spot.

He walked into the grub spot and I followed. At a table Chax sat waiting for us, and before him a plate of food and a glass. Vulcan turned around and walked out, so I made my way to the table and sat down. However, Chax didn’t even look at me, still mad. I didn’t really give a damn, because the moment I saw him one of the demon’s questions came to mind. Why didn’t he help me if he saw Marcus grab me? Pissed at him, knowing he might have seen the whole thing and didn’t do anything, I sat down and began to eat. One bite after the other the questions made their way back to me. Why train me to fight and survive, and then ask me to run back to him for help?

“Marcus has fully healed,” he said, breaking the silence.

I kept my eyes on my plate, so what? Maybe the demon was right about that too, he did touch me without my consent and maybe he also deserved what he got. I was getting more pissed off by the moment. How dare he talk to me about Marcus, he didn’t even give a damn when I was in his arms, frightened to death! I finished up the plate in record time and stood up and placed it in the wash bin, gulping down my glass of milk and placing it in with it.

I turned around and looked at him; he was for a change looking at me. “So, are we going to train?” I asked, folding my arms across my chest. He looked at me for a while, just watching me, then got up and offered me his hand. I walked over to him and took it, my eyes fixed on his. I believe this would be called a challenge stare. We shifted in to his garden and I released his hand and walked over to the circle, taking my jacket off and dropping it on the ground. Reaching the circle, I stopped, turned, and looked at him. He was still standing there looking at me, and then he walked slowly over to me; our eyes still locked.