Keep You From Harm (11 page)

“I
got a job,” I announce at dinner.

“I thought we decided you didn’t need a job,” Kyle says.

“I need my own money.”

“What for?” Chloe asks.

I spear a piece of chicken. “For one thing, even if I do get the scholarships I’ve applied for, I’ll have expenses for school next year.”

“Raielle, as long as it’s within reason, we’re happy to pay for those things,” Kyle says. I notice Chloe’s eyes shoot over to him. I get the feeling they haven’t discussed this.

“But it’s other things, too,” I continue. “There’s the fee for a learner’s permit, and I need some new clothes. You’re doing so much for me already, I can’t ask you to pay for those things.”

“Learner’s permit?” Chloe asks.

I nod. “I’m learning to drive.”

“You don’t know how to drive?” Kyle says surprised. “What do you mean, you’re learning?”

I tense as he puts his fork down, and gives me his full attention. “Lucas, Myles’s friend, offered to teach me. We went out today for the first time.”

“Lucas Diesel?” Chloe says with raised eyebrows. “He’s a very nice-looking boy.”

I grimace at the look Kyle gives me, and wish I could sink under the table.

“Raielle, I wish you would have told me these things were worrying you. I could have taken you driving. And of course I don’t mind paying for the learner’s permit and new clothes. What do we have to do to make you trust us?” He shakes his head. “Please tell me what to do. Help me out here.” His expression is filled with disappointment.

There’s that word again,
trust
. I feel the weight of Kyle’s expectations pushing down on me. I don’t know why I’m finding it easier to trust Lucas than my own brother. “There’s nothing to do,” I tell him. “It’s not you. It’s me. You were seventeen years too late finding me.” With that, I get up from the table and stalk down the stairs to my bedroom.

The guilt I feel for speaking to Kyle so harshly is all I can think about as I stare sightlessly at my homework. I finally give up and close my books when I hear him coming down the stairs. I watch as he stops in front of my bed and sits himself down on the end. “Where is your job?” he asks.

I move my books to the floor and give him my attention. “Scoops.”

“The ice cream place?”

I nod.

“When will you be working?” His question is plainly stated. I detect no judgment or censure there.

“Two days a week after school and Saturday afternoons.”

He glances down at my textbook on the carpet. “Calculus?”

“Yeah,” I sigh.

“I was always pretty good in math. I guess that’s why I’m an accountant.” He seems to consider his next words carefully before speaking. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier, about trusting us. I should know it’s not a switch you can just turn on. I know it has to be earned.”

“You don’t need to be sorry. I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you,” I say, and I mean it. I’m disappointed in myself. I promised I would give Kyle a fair chance. That I would be more open with him, but I have no idea how to actually do that. I’m afraid I can’t be the sister he wants. I also worry I can’t be the girl Lucas wants. I’m afraid I’m going to disappoint them both.

“I guess we’re both sorry then,” he smiles. “Raielle, we’re still getting to know each other. We’ve missed a lot of time. We’re not going to make up for it in just a few weeks. But I want you to know that from what I’ve seen so far, I’m very proud of who you are.” Then he pats my leg and says, “Goodnight.”

I sit there quietly after he leaves thinking about his words. My mother told me she was proud of me sometimes, but it never meant much. She failed at so many things in her life, I didn’t think it took much to impress her. But coming from Kyle, it resonates with me, and I feel a twinge of pride at his words.

Several hours later, I’ve finished my homework, and I’m just turning out the light when my phone buzzes on the nightstand beside me. I see I have a text from Lucas.

I wanted
2b the last person u spoke to before u went 2 sleep.

I smile at my phone and text back.
We’re not actually speaking, but you are the last person I’m interacting with today.

Are u always so literal?

I think so.

Good 2 know. Goodnight.

Goodnight.

I put the phone down and spend a long time replaying my afternoon with Lucas before I finally drift off to sleep.

D
espite
what he said about taking it slowly, Lucas does not ease me into things the next day at school. After the usual morning walk with Myles and April, I run into Gwen when we hit the schoolyard. With all of us congregated there, Lucas appears. He heads straight for me. Then he wraps his arm around my shoulder and kisses the side of my head. “Morning,” he whispers into my hair, and I can feel his warm breath on my scalp just above my ear. My body temperature shoots up as he touches me, and I feel like a spotlight is shining on us. Myles and April are silently staring and Gwen could catch flies in her mouth. Everyone gathered on the front lawn seems to be noticing us.

I glance at Lucas, and I’m not surprised to see his smug face. “We’re going to be late,” I mumble and then extract myself from beneath his heavy arm and head inside. Predictably, Gwen moves in beside me.

“Oh my god. When did this happen?” she asks.

“Yesterday.”

“What exactly went down yesterday?”

I look over my shoulder to see where Lucas is. He’s still at the bottom of the steps where it appears Myles is trying to pry the same information out of him.

“Lucas gave me my first driving lesson and we talked.”

She squeezes my shoulder. “You talked? What did he say? Did he declare his undying love?”

I chuckle. “Not exactly.”

“So, what then?”

I shrug. “He admitted stuff. I admitted stuff. We decided we like each other. That’s all.”

She snorts out a laugh. “That’s the most boring thing I’ve ever heard. You suck when it comes to dishing out details. Come on. I have to live vicariously through you. You need to give me more.”

I feel myself blushing.

“I knew it!” she declares. “I knew there was something good you weren’t telling me.”

“He sent me a text last night.”

Gwen squeals. “Did he sext you? Oh my god, that’s so hot.”

I roll my eyes. “No, he just said he wanted to be last person I spoke to before I went to sleep.” I smile thinking about it again.

Gwen purses her lips. “Hmmm. So, no sexting. But still, kind of romantic. I guess I’ll take that.”

We split up to head to our lockers. I’m just closing mine when I turn around and see Chad standing there.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey,” I repeat, trying to cover my wariness.

He runs his hand over his bald head. His intricate network of tattoos is on display today in a red tank shirt. “So, I was thinking maybe we could hang out after school,” he says.

I’m thankful to have a valid excuse. “I’m sorry I can’t. I have to work.”

He nods quickly and his eyes don’t meet mine. “Oh, okay. No problem. See you later.” Then he turns and heads down the hallway.

That was weird and fast. I’m wondering if I hurt his feelings. I’m surprised he even has any after my first encounter with him.

Lucas is just walking into English as I reach the classroom door. I stop for a moment and stare at him, hardly believing all that transpired between us yesterday. I watch as he lowers himself into his desk, folding his longs legs beneath him. Then he turns toward the door. His eyes brighten when he spots me. Butterflies take flight in my stomach, and his gaze follows me as I cross in front of him, taking the desk beside him.

“Oh, Lucas, you have to let me copy your notes from last week. I was completely brain dead on Friday.”

I glance behind him to find pixie girl standing there.

Lucas closes his eyes for a moment before turning around. “Sure, Alison,” he says, reaching for his notebook. Then she proceeds to monopolize him with inane questions about the notes until the teacher appears. I’m wondering if I should be jealous, but his obvious desire to disengage himself from her mostly amuses me.

When class ends, she’s right there, trying to talk to him again. “I’ll catch you later,” he tells her dismissively as he falls into step beside me. I notice her frowning at me.

I’m about to ask him if he ever went out with her, when he interrupts my thoughts. “I found your guy,” he says once we’re in the hallway.

“What?” I ask, confused.

“Robert Jarvis. I looked him up.”

I stop to face him. “You Googled him?”

He nods. “He works at the Spring Valley Assisted Living Center.” Then he hands me a piece of notebook paper with the name written down on it.

I stare at it dumbly. “I can’t believe you took it upon yourself to do this,” I say.

He puts his fingers beneath my chin and lifts my face. “Of course I’d want to help you.”

I swallow self-consciously. “Was he easy to find?”

Lucas shrugs. “I just typed in his name and Fort Upton. Then it took a little digging. I mostly found websites talking about Isolation. There’s actually a fan site with personal information about all of them, including Jarvis. This assisted living place is right outside of town, not too far from here. Have you heard of it?”

I shake my head. “We’re not going to find any connection between him and me, are we?”

He gives me a sympathetic half-smile. “Not if there isn’t one.”

I fold the paper and put it my bag.

“Y
our
boyfriend just warned me to stay away from you,” Lucas states, tossing his lunch tray down onto the table with a clank.

Gwen’s eyes widen at his appearance. Tyler and Lisa stare up at him in mute surprise.

“Are you sitting with us today?” I ask even as he’s lowering himself into the empty seat beside me.

“Why?” he growls. “Are you saving this seat for your boyfriend?”

I toss my sandwich down. “Okay, I’ll bite. What are you talking about?”

He leans toward me. “Chad Bleeker just confronted me in the hallway. He said I’d better stay away from you because you’re his.”

“What?” Gwen and I both screech at the same time.

“Is there something you’d like to tell me?” he asks.

“Of course not,” I reply defensively.

“Then why the hell would he say that?” Lucas snaps, and the people at the tables around us turn to look.

I can feel my cheeks heating. “I have no idea. I’ve never given him any encouragement and the fact that you think I did and I’m lying to you about it is ticking me off.” I begin shoving my lunch back into my bag. Across the table, I spot Tyler and Lisa slinking away, but I’m sure Gwen is glued to her seat. She wouldn’t miss this show for anything.

Lucas sits back and sighs heavily. “I know Bleeker’s always full of shit. I’m sorry, okay?”

I ignore him and continue gathering my things.

“Raielle,” he places a hand on my arm. “He caught me off guard,” he pauses, struggling for his next sentence. “This whole thing caught me off guard.”

I glance up and realize he’s referring to more than just Chad.

“Did you say anything to him?” Gwen asks Lucas.

He runs a hand through his hair. “Yeah. I told him he was mistaken after I slammed him up against the wall.”

“Lucas!” I cry.

“What?” he asks, starting to tense again. “Are you going to defend him now?”

I glare at him, and he glares right back. “Gwen, could you give us a minute?” I ask in a calm voice that belies the way my blood is boiling.

“Seriously?” she whines.

I level pleading eyes at her.

“Fine,” she huffs.

Once she’s gone, I take a deep breath and turn to Lucas. He’s leaning back in his chair. The glare is gone. Now he’s just staring at me stone-faced. “Chad keeps asking me out,” I begin and watch the muscle in his cheek tic. “And I keep telling him no. But I think I hurt his feelings, and I don’t believe there’s any need for you to bully him or get physical with him.”

He barks out a laugh, but he doesn’t seem at all amused. “He’s the one who threatened me. It doesn’t bother you that he’s walking around declaring that you’re his?”

“Of course it bothers me. There’s obviously something wrong with him. But, I don’t know. I guess I feel kind of bad for him.”

“You feel bad for him? He screws a different girl every night. He has groupies hanging around him all the time. You do not need to feel bad for the man whore of the school.”

I roll my eyes at his reaction. “Fine. I’ll talk to him. I’ll ask him to stop saying untrue things about me.”

He sits forward. “No, you won’t. You’ll stay away from him.”

“You’re overacting,” I complain, annoyed.

“I mean it, Raielle.”

I blink in disbelief at him. “What makes you think you can tell me what to do?”

“I’m not telling you what to do.”

“Sounds like it to me.”

He shakes his head. “I just think that staying away from him is the smart way to handle this. Eventually he’ll get the picture. If he doesn’t, I’ll have to explain it to him again.”

“This whole thing is ridiculous,” I mutter. “I can’t believe we’re fighting about it.”

Lucas reaches over and takes my hand. From the corner of my eye, I’m aware that most of the cafeteria is watching our display. “Is it wrong that fighting with you turns me on as much as everything else about you does?” His hand tightens around mine because he thinks I’m going to pull away in embarrassment. But I surprise myself by smiling at him instead because I feel the same way, completely alive when we’re together, fighting or not.

“So, I was thinking,” he begins, my hand still in his. “I could pick you up after work tonight and we could go get some dinner.”

“Okay,” I answer, letting my irritation dissolve away. Kyle already said he would come get me after my shift, but I don’t think he’ll mind if I tell him Lucas and I are going out.

We gather our things and leave the cafeteria together.

When I text Kyle to let him know that Lucas is getting me after work and we have dinner plans, he surprises me by texting a short reply back, telling me I have to be home by ten on school nights. I get the feeling he is not pleased.

G
wen
is waiting by my locker after school. She informs me that she’s driving me to work and during the ride, I’m going to tell her everything about Lucas and me.

“You haven’t really kissed him yet?” she asks as we’re sitting in traffic, waiting to get out of the school parking lot.

I shake my head. She already dismissed the peck he gave me as nothing more than a preview. “This is barely twenty-four hours old. We mostly just argue so far,” I laugh.

She clears her throat and glances at me. “I overheard something today, but I’m not sure if I should tell you or not?” she hedges.

“Tell me what?” I ask, of course.

“I heard Sophie and Kellie at their lockers after lunch. They were basically talking shit about you.”

“That’s not exactly a big surprise,” I reply shrugging it off. Then my curiosity gets the better of me. “What were they saying?”

She doesn’t answer.

“Gwen?”

She blows the hair out of her eyes and glances warily at me. “It was mostly Kellie. She said that you’re basically a slut, and the only reason you have Lucas panting after you is because you’re leading him around by his penis.”

“Great,” I mutter, resting my head back against the seat. “If Lucas hears this, he’s going to go crazy.”

“He should,” she says.

“How did I get pulled into all this drama? I just wanted to keep my head down and finish my senior year.”

“It’s high school, Raielle. Drama is a required part of the curriculum.” She pulls up in front of Scoops and turns to me. “So, you’re all in on this? No more denying it. No more pretending that there’s nothing between you and Lucas? You’re going to go for it?”

I chuckle at her. “Yeah, I guess I am. I couldn’t deny it if I wanted to.”

“Smart girl,” she says.

“Thanks, Gwen. For being so supportive.” I feel badly that Jake is so obviously interested in Kellie and Gwen is pretending that it doesn’t matter to her. “What do you think about Tyler?” I ask.

“What do you mean?” she asks, wrinkling her nose at me. “You mean, do I like him?”

I nod. “He’s adorable in a subtle geeky kind of way. I don’t think there’s anything going on between him and Lisa.”

She shakes her like it’s a crazy suggestion. “No way. Now, go. You’re gonna be late.”

“Will you think about it? I’m pretty sure he’s interested. I catch him looking at you a lot.”

This news seems to surprise her, but then she shakes her head resolutely. “Nope,” she says, popping the P.

I frown at her reply. Then after thanking her for the ride, I head into Scoops.

“I’m Stacy,” the owner greets me. She’s extremely short and petite with a mass of dark curly hair that rests stiffly on her shoulders. “It’s just you and me tonight. On Saturdays, you’ll be working with Jacinda. She’s my niece. You guys will get along great.”

Stacy has me fill out all the employee forms, and then she proceeds to show me where everything is. She tells me how much ice cream to use for each size cup and cone. Then she demonstrates the cash register to me. What I hadn’t counted on was how cold it would be in the store, which of course I should have anticipated. Stacy is bubbly and friendly, and she disappears into the back after my brief orientation.

My first night is pretty quiet. Only a handful of people come in. I’m so cold I’m not even tempted to eat any ice cream myself. I’m actually shivering when Lucas arrives to get me at seven.

“Jesus, it’s cold in here,” he says. “How was your first day?”

“Good,” I reply. I poke my head into the back to let Stacy know I’m leaving. Once we’re in Lucas’s truck, I reach over and crank the heat up as high as it will go.

He glances over at me. “You need to dress warmer when you’re working.”

“Yeah, that’s the main takeaway from my first day. By the way, Kyle said I have to be home by ten on school nights.”

He gives a little surprised laugh. “Okay, then. Well, we’re just going to a little place I know in Ridgeton. That should get you back in time.”

“Thanks. I’m starving by the way.” I reach my icy hands toward the heater vents.

“We can’t have you going hungry on my watch. What the hell?” he mutters, glancing up at the rearview mirror.

“What is it?” I ask, turning around to see what he’s looking at.

“It’s Grady Callahan and one of his idiot friends. They’re all over the road back there.”

I look back again and see a Mustang close behind us. Suddenly, its engine roars to life, and it moves up to pass us on the left. When the car is even with us, a guy hangs his head out the passenger window and whoops loudly at us before tossing an empty beer can onto the road. The Mustang quickly overtakes us and speeds ahead, disappearing around the bend.