Kept (29 page)

Hands snuck around my waist and pulled me back against a warm body. “Hey, you,” Thorn whispered.

He attempted to kiss my ear, but with a stiff back, I turned away. I shook my head. “I shouldn’t have come here with you.” My heart beat painfully, but I had to do it. I knew the Code. The pack and its debts came first. Not me.

With a fiery sword, I had to let him go, had to pierce his heart to do the right thing. “All these feelings I have for you—I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist. Hell, I didn’t want to resist. And so I came here. And I touched you. But I shouldn’t have.”

He cursed under his breath as I took a step away from him. He continued to hold on to me.

Tears wet my cheeks, lingered on my upper lip.

He touched my back, but I shifted away. This couldn’t be happening—how could I just let him go? He tried to pull me back again, but I refused to budge.

Why was it that I could still taste him, that it took
everything
I had to not turn around?

“I’d be willing to give up everything for you. We could try to make it work,” he whispered. “You don’t have to do this.”

After an awkward amount of time passed, I managed to reply. “But you’d have to abandon the pack for me. It comes first, Thorn. You have an obligation to it.”

“Nat … We both knew the moment we first kissed that I had an obligation. I want you to come first this time.”

I was crying now, but the words came easily. “I’ve fought so hard to put my family and the pack first. I can’t just turn my back on them. No matter how I feel.”

“Did my
obligation
to the pack stop me from making love to you?”

I tried to bury the increasing pain in my chest. To ignore the bitter taste of the bile at the back of my throat. Even though I moved to leave, I wished I’d heard the words he’d whispered into my hair before they left with the wind. Perhaps he’d told me he loved me back.

“Did it?” he repeated, his voice vehement.

“We need to stay away from each other from now on.” The pain returned, and I accepted it. Just as I accepted our lovemaking couldn’t be shoved under a rock and forgotten. Every werewolf who encountered either of us would know. They would smell him on me, and me on him. Anyone would know we’d made love.

He let go of me and walked around me to leave the house. He didn’t turn around. And he didn’t reply to what I’d said.

It was a damn shame no one was around to hear me say, “I love you, Thorn.”

Chapter 24

T
he
next morning, I still didn’t feel any better. My belly ached, and since I’d wronged the universe, my morning just went to hell. My best blouse had a tear. My skirt had a wrinkle that just wouldn’t
die
, even after I steamed it to death. And on the way to work, I got a lovely flat tire.

No one stopped to help me either.

While I hauled out the spare, more dark thoughts weighed down my shoulders. It was the shame of my late-night tryst being out in the open. No matter how many times I doused myself in body wash, I couldn’t scrub Thorn’s scent from my body. The next couple of days would be pure hell. I cringed as I finished changing the tire. I’d brought all of this on myself. I was the
other
woman. The one that wasn’t good enough to actually be his mate. Whatever happened to me today, I pretty much deserved it.

Like I’d promised, I’d packaged that treacherous goblin’s enchanted blade to ship it back to him. But when I got to the postal service drop-box by The Bends, I noticed that the damn weapon had morphed itself again, this time into a stupid broadsword. (As to what was lurking nearby that would require me to need one, I really didn’t want to know.) The sharp blade protruded out of the metal box. Somehow it had “cut” through the
metal, and now I had something I couldn’t ship without violating several safety laws.
Swell
.

It didn’t improve my mood, of course, when Bill had something to say about my tardy arrival.

“What happened to you? You’re
late
.” He spied a customer who let her kids wander too close to some glasses. Any closer and he’d have to show his true colors and be an irate business owner. “Just because your trials are coming soon doesn’t give you an excuse to show up looking all tired and old—”

“Good morning to you too, Bill.” With a sour face, I waved at him and kept walking. He had no room to talk about people looking old. I’d seen what his species really looked like. Even though he was a few centuries old, his age was the
least
of his problems.

Work that morning was blissfully quiet. That is, until the customer service desk bell went off. I didn’t want to look to see who it was. Especially if it was Erica. With one whiff of Thorn she’d be pining for a bitchfest of epic proportions.

When I couldn’t take the ringing anymore, I left the business office and noticed a witch around my age playing with the ringer on the desk. I didn’t recognize her, but she had a casual air about her. She flipped her chestnut bob back and smiled as I approached. Not too much perfume, but a pleasant dab of something expensive and tasteful. I wondered if she’d been around werewolves before. Most folks bathed themselves in the stuff without thinking about the noses around them.

“Hi,” she said. “I corresponded with someone regarding an item I found online.” She whipped out her Black-Berry and typed furiously on it. My goodness, I had a phone, but the most I did with it was place calls. She swiveled her hand around to show me a picture of the ornament she was referring to.

“I called about the Santa’s Big Breakfast Christmas ornament. I saw it on your website a month ago, and I thought it’d be a perfect present for my friend. She goes crazy for anything related to breakfast.”

I grinned and thought,
She isn’t the only one crazy for that thing
. I knew exactly where it was on the floor. I’d ogled it every time I passed it. In fact, I’d almost bought it, until an e-mail from a Tessa Dandridge up in New York City inquired about it. I could have said no and hoarded the thing like that Golem from the
Lord of the Rings
, but my customers came first.

She leaned forward and smiled. “It’s still available, right?”

Willpower, could you kick in right now, please?
Customers needed to come first. “Of course. Isn’t he cute? Let’s go take a look at him.” Part of me screamed,
Santa’s Big Breakfast should be mine!
I’ve had a bad day, and he should be part of my collection at home to make up for the hell I was about to endure. Would she appreciate him? Or should I ask, would her breakfast-crazed friend protect his wooden table with a plate of pancakes stacked in a precarious manner? I didn’t think so.

We walked over to the display case for small trinkets. I blurted, “Are you sure she’ll like it? I have plenty of shiny wands I’m sure she’d love.”

“Oh, no. She gets wind-witch wands from her family in Chicago for her birthday every year. She donates them to charity all the time. I mean, who’d want a wand simply because it’s shiny? For all you know, the thing could cast spells to make mud pies.” Then she slowed down as she spied the ornament.

“There it is! So adorable.” Her face wore the same expression as people do when they saw a cute baby. She had great taste in clothes and ornaments, but I didn’t see myself tolerating her presence for hours on end.

Of course, Thorn would pick this time to walk in. My
body softened, and I hoped he wouldn’t look my way.
Especially after what I’d done
. The witch’s eyes left the display case to follow my brief glance. She gave a short assessment. “Not married. And quite attractive.”

I eyed her and tried to fight the surge of jealousy. Had she set her sights on him as well? “What kind of comment is that?”

“I’m a matchmaker. With your eyesight you would’ve caught it as well if you looked for such things. He’s not my type, but I can see he’s yours.” She leaned against the display case with a wide grin.

“He’s a friend from a few years ago.”

“I beg to differ on that one.”

“You just met me. What makes you think you can stand here and figure out whether I find a guy attractive?”

From across the room, I heard Thorn whisper a few words to Bill and then walk out the door. But before he left, he paused. I almost waited for him to turn around. To at least glance my way. But it was best to at least
try
to be strong under the circumstances. So I focused on my customer.

“Should I scrape you off the floor now or later?” the witch matchmaker asked with a knowing smile. She pulled an imaginary piece of lint from her mauve-colored coat.

“I just glanced at him—that’s all.” I had no plans to broadcast my pain to some stranger.

“Look, I’ve been matching people for several years now. I can tell you like him. You might’ve thought you stood there, but you didn’t. While you were trying to play coy, he got an eyeful of you that would’ve made me want to check out his wand if he had one.”

Damn. So he had looked at me. I tried to pull myself together, but the woman read body language like a sharp-eyed werewolf.

“Th-there’s nothing between us—not anymore.”

She snorted. “Yeah, and you’re just good friends. Isn’t that what you said?” She tapped the display case. “Is the price the same as what was advertised on the Internet?”

I wasn’t ready to let the subject die. “We’re just friends.”

Tessa stood up and rested her hands on her hips. “Can you stand there with a straight face and tell me you wouldn’t say yes if he asked you out right now?”

“He’s engaged.” I reached for reasons, and they came quickly. “Her name is Erica, and I’m sure they’ll have a happy life together with lots of kids.”

She tilted her head and waited. Damn, she was good.

“Yes, Thorn and I have a history, but we’re not in a position to act on it.” I glanced at the door and hoped she didn’t see it. “We can never be more. Not ever.”

“Is that what you want? Is that what he wants?”

I bit my lower lip and pushed a tray of fake costume jewelry on the counter two inches, into its proper place. “What I want doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Who says so? Someone important?”

The Code said so. The pack’s well-being said so. Didn’t she have a purchase to make? I may have desired Santa for my collection, but this intrusive witch scratched my hide the wrong way, and I wanted her to leave.

“You deserve happiness like everyone else.” She flashed me a bright smile, and I couldn’t help but return it. “You should grasp the bull—errr, wolf—by the tail and go after what you want.”

I shook my head. I’d already made my choice and couldn’t go back. It was time to focus on the store. Where was the incessant stream of customers who bothered me all the time? Of course, for this brief moment in time, the witch had me on the spot without interruptions.

“Do you want to be alone?” she asked me. “Is that the
way you want to live? ’Cause if I had a man like him around, I wouldn’t want to be alone.” She opened her pocketbook and retrieved a card. “Look, you may not want to do it, but even shy people can connect with others. Here’s my card. Give me a call at my office and we can talk. You seem like a nice woman. A bit eccentric—but as a witch, people could say the same about me.”

“Thanks.” I traced my fingers along the glossy letters of the card.

“No problem. And keep your head up! You need to go after him if your heart’s in it. Or at least start dating. Happiness these days is yours to have, if you want it. Life’s a journey that’s meant to be shared with someone else.” She peered into the display case again.

I tucked her card into my pocket. Time to buck up, think about taking her advice for the future. The trials would pass, and I’d need to reevaluate my life after that. “Would you like the ornament gift-wrapped?”

“That would be fabulous. Danielle will love it!”

The trip home from work was a quiet one. There was no need to hurry. Tomorrow I’d have enough to stress about, what with the trials. Why rush to meet my doom?

When I reached my house, Aggie had already come home and left. I didn’t see a note either. I guessed she’d make an appearance after spending some quality time with Will.

I ventured outside to get some firewood. Might as well start a fire and make some s’mores like I usually did.

With all the quiet around, I never saw the strike coming. Like Thorn often does, she seemed to appear out of nowhere, a blonde wraith with bouncing curls—and a solid swing of her iron crowbar against my thigh.

Chapter 25

F
or
the rest of my life, I’ll never forget the sound of my bones breaking, my flesh tearing open from the splintered bits. The choked sounds from my mouth as the agonizing pain shuddered through me.

Erica stood over me, her eyes venomous. “When burned, a lesson learned,” she purred.

To add to the fun, that evil, vindictive bitch lit a match and burned my hand with it. I guessed she had to back up her little “lesson” with the real thing. She circled around me before tossing her crowbar in the snow. Then she kicked me in my ribs. Her steel-toe boots hurt like hell.

I tried to suck in a few breaths, but she grabbed my hair and brought me up to look at her. “I told you over and over again to stay away from him. I guess you’re too stupid to figure it out.”

She was silent for a moment, but that didn’t last for long. “Since you’ve
fallen down
, I don’t expect you’ll show up at the trials. And if you tell Thorn about our little
talk
, I might just have to visit your brother and his family after I become Thorn’s mate.” The sneer on her mouth grew. “Perhaps all the Stravinskys deserve my special treatment?”

Something in me snapped. “If you touch them—”

“Shut up!” She placed her boot on my shattered leg, and daze-inducing white pain arched through me.

I yelped like a wounded pup.

She released my hair with a vicious jerk and then retrieved her crowbar. Shocked and dizzy, I stared at the growing red spot on the snow. The pool built—all of it from me. I could almost feel the pull of my body attempting to close the wound. To keep my lifeblood from seeping out of me.