Lady Jane (4 page)

She could not go on, but she had no need to. Crews and Mrs. Hawks exchanged a look of horrified comprehension.

“How old are you, girl?” said Mrs. Hawks softly.

“F-f-fourteen, ma’am.”

“My God!” exclaimed Mrs. Hawks simply.

Crews cleared his throat and turned away, busying himself with poking up the fire to hide his pity.

“Well, anyway,” said Jane, recovering and raising her head proudly, “I got away from there as soon as I could walk this mornin’—I’ll be all right again in a few days.”

Mrs. Hawks studied her for a moment. Then she rose decisively. “Crews. Ask Jem to fetch that extra cot to my room from the attic, if you’ll be so good.”

He turned to her in surprise and then began to smile. “Yes. At once, Mrs. Hawks, bless you, at once.”

He hurried away and Mrs. Hawks put her hand under Jane’s arm to assist her from the chair.

“Come along, child. You’ll stay with me for a few days, till you recover and then we’ll see what we shall see.”

“Oh—but—but—how can I? Won’t the mistress—”

“She’ll know nothing of it, and if she did she’d approve. My mistress is Lady Stanier, and she’s
real
Quality. Kindest woman you’d ever hope to meet.”

While she talked at great length about all the sterling qualities of her mistress, she led Jane through the kitchen and down the hall to her room, a large, comfortably furnished apartment with a cheerful fire and a large upholstered chair before it She put Jane into this and told her not to move till she was bid, and went to hold the door for two footmen who could be heard shuffling down the hall to Mrs. Hawks’ room. The cot was set up in a corner, and a maid came in bearing a load of blankets and sheets and made up the bed under Mrs. Hawks’ direction. When all was done and the room was quiet again, Mrs. Hawks told Jane to come along now and get into the bed.

“Oh, Mrs. Hawks—I don’t feel I should put you to all this trouble—” Jane began.

“Let’s have done with all that nonsense, if you please. Just come along over here and let me worry about all else. I’ve a daughter of my own about your age, so I know what’s needed at a time like this.”

“Does she live here with you, Mrs. Hawks?” Jane asked, beginning to fumble with the buttons of her gown.

Mrs. Hawks pushed Jane’s hands away and continued the job herself. “Lord love you, no. She’s safe in the country, with my old mum. No child of mine would live in this wicked town!” she declared, competently stripping Jane’s clothes away. “Oh, my dear Lord,” she breathed in disbelief as the full extent of Jane’s injuries were revealed to her.

But she would not allow herself to say more. Her lips folded in a grim line, she set about washing the wounds and applying salve to them. She bandaged the legs lightly, then pulled a nightgown, large as a tent, over the girl’s head and assisted her into the bed. She plumped up a pile of cushions behind Jane’s head and pulled the quilt up under her chin, then sat down heavily on the edge of the bed.

“Now—you mustn’t mind me asking, child—but he
did
have his way with you, did he?”

Jane nodded, looking away in shame, before she managed to whisper, “Twice.”

“What! You mean in this condition he—well, never mind that—are your courses regular yet?”

“Not often.”

“Well, we must hope there’s enough confusion in that direction to prevent your becoming pregnant. I’ll give you something to drink which might bring you on, but it’s in God’s hands as you know, and we must trust in Him to help you.”

“I’m sure I’m sunk too low in His sight to—” Jane began, her throat tight with tears.

At this Mrs. Hawks put her arms about Jane and drew her tight against her capacious bosom. “Never think it, dearie, never for one moment. You’ve done no wrong, but was done to, and well He knows it. You must always remember that, child, if any should dare cast a stone.”

With a convulsive sob, Jane threw her arms about the woman’s neck, and let go all the pent up rage and pain and humiliation she felt. Her sobs became deep and hacking, shaking her whole body, and through it all Mrs. Hawks held her tightly, urging her to cry it out, all the while the tears ran unchecked down her own fat cheeks.

4

Jane followed the
broad back of Mrs. Hawks down the hall and through the green baize door to the front of the house. Her knees trembled and her heart pounded, not from pain or fear now, but only from excitement.

Three days of Mrs. Hawks’ ministrations had erased most of the terrible effects of Jane’s experience with Mr. Leach. Mrs. Hawks had tended her devotedly and firmly, refusing to allow Jane to move for two days during which she bathed, fed, and doctored the girl lovingly. By the third day this care and Jane’s own fourteen-year-old recuperative powers had restored some of the lost sparkle to her eyes and a faint glow of colour in her cheeks. Her swollen lips had regained their former contours and the slashes on her legs had begun to mend, though there was still a faint greenish tinge around the flesh of her right eye, and a soreness and bruising in her jaw as reminders of her ordeal. The real, unhealed scar, however, was in her mind. Sleep, those first two nights, had been disturbed over and over by the same nightmare from which she awoke gasping and struggling to find Mrs. Hawks sitting on the side of the bed trying to soothe her. Jane would explain, in broken sobs, that she dreamed she was being smothered by a huge faceless form which seemed to press the breath from her body. Her waking dreams were nearly as bad, for the terrible scenes played themselves over and over in her mind while she imagined other courses she could have taken, other ways she could have protected herself from his attacks. If only—if only—she saw herself dealing Mr. Leach the same treatment she had dealt Lord Jaspar, and ground her aching jaws in frustration that she had not done so. She repledged herself to vengeance on Mr. Leach again and again.

By the third day the resilience that is the blessing of youth allowed her to forget somewhat these darkling thoughts and respond to the friendliness exhibited by the staff, who came for orders to Mrs. Hawks’ room, or to bring trays for the invalid. One and all smiled upon her encouragingly. She could not help but wonder to find so much kindness from an entire household. Mrs. Hawks said that such things started from the top.

“As master and mistress, so will be the staff. I’ve found it always to be so. If you have coldness and meanness at the top it will seep down belowstairs for sure. Here we’ve Lady Stanier, and a mean thought never entered that woman’s mind, and not one of us who work for her would ever want to do anything she would disapprove of. Them as starts any of that squabbling or backbiting is got rid of at once.”

Jane had been allowed to join the servants at table for supper on her third day in the Stanier household, and though there had been some covert glances, she could feel there was nothing sly nor condemnatory in them. There was a general warmth in the gathering and they included her in it so naturally, she lost her initial shyness after only a few moments, and was able to enter the conversation of a group of giggling young upstairs maids her own age. That night her sleep was interrupted only once by the recurring nightmare.

And this morning had come the heart-stopping announcement from Mrs. Hawks that she had spoken to the mistress and there might be a place for Jane with Lady Stanier’s sister.

“But I must warn you it’s a far piece from Lunnon. Way down in Kent it ’tis, not even in walking distance of a village. Very different from all you’ve known in your young life so far,” Mrs. Hawks warned.

“Oh, please, Mrs. Hawks, I shan’t mind that, I promise you. And I shall work very hard, tell m’lady, and I am very strong, really. Never sick a day in me life before this,” Jane pleaded urgently.

“I know, child, I know. Now don’t get yerself in a taking. Go neaten your hair. M’lady will send for us directly she’s had her breakfast.”

The summons had finally come, and now she was to meet Lady Stanier, who was found in her morning room, seated before a delicate, rosewood desk. She was a lady well into her middle years, but she was still slim and youthful looking, with an exceedingly gentle expression.

“Here’s the young person, m’lady—Jane Coombes.”

Lady Stanier turned and acknowledged Jane’s curtsy with a warm smile.

“Mrs. Hawks tells me you’d be interested in going to my sister in Kent?”

“Indeed I would, m’lady.”

“Have you ever lived in the country?”

“No, m’lady, I’m a Lunnoner, born and bred, but me mam was from Dorset and told me about it, and I think I should like it fine.”

“My sister, Lady Payton, lives very quietly and is situated a great distance from the nearest town. I have sent girls down to her before, but city girls seem to find the country frightening and lonely and leave after only a few weeks,” said Lady Stanier warningly.

“M’lady, if they’ll but gie’ me a bed to mesel’ I’ll not mind nothin’,” Jane replied fiercely.

“A bed to yourself!” exclaimed Lady Stanier in amused astonishment, “well, I can’t imagine that would present a problem. Larkwoods contains at least thirty bedrooms, and there can’t be more than five in use to my certain knowledge, since the family consists of my sister and her son, and a staff of three elderly retainers.”

“Excuse me, m’lady, but would I have the cleanin’ of all them rooms? I mean—” Jane, willing and eager as she was for the job, couldn’t help experiencing some doubt about the desirability of the position after all.

“Oh good heavens, no!” laughed Lady Stanier. “My sister lives very quietly, you see, and most of the rooms have been closed off for years. Her son is—er—an invalid, so they don’t go out or entertain.”

“Ah—well then, if you think I’ll suit, I’m of a mind to go for sure, m’lady, and grateful to you for the chance.”

Lady Stanier studied the girl for a moment, wondering why she hesitated. Was it the girl’s youth? Her prettiness? For even through the bruises (and here Lady Stanier paused in her thoughts to direct a most unladylike curse in Leach’s direction) it was clear to see that the girl was uncommonly pretty. I wonder where she came by those bones? Lady Stanier mused, never from the mother if she was a country girl from Dorset. Probably the by-blow of some lusty young lord. Good God! she thought suddenly, I wonder
where
in Dorset? There’s a branch of my father’s family in Dorset. The child might even be related to me. She smiled at the drift of her thoughts, and tried to bring her mind back to order. I wonder if I should mention Sebastian? It would be only fair to warn the poor child. But then she thought of her dear sister, so good, so sacrificing, and the problems she faced trying to keep that great house running and tend to poor Sebastian. No, she decided, I’ll say nothing. The girl’s young and strong, and will take no harm, after all, and if it proves too much for her she’ll come scurrying back to London like all the rest, no doubt.

“Very well, Jane, I’ll make the arrangements. How soon would you be able to leave?”

“For all of me, this minute, m’lady,” Jane replied, with such a blinding smile that Lady Stanier was quite dazzled.

She laughed in genuine pleasure at so much happiness. “We’ll make it tomorrow, shall we? That will give me time to write my sister and warn her of your coming. You will want to collect your belongings from your lodgings, I make no doubt.”

Jane’s smile faded at the thought of going back to the Blodgetts, but she knew she must go, if not to collect her pitifully few belongings, at least to thank Mrs. Blodgett for her kindness. Terrible as the accommodations had been, they had been offered with no hesitation, and if they had not been, Jane would have been in the streets, for she had had no place to turn to besides these friends of her mother’s.

“You will of course come back here directly to spend the night, child. I’ll send a footman to buy you a seat on the Mail that leaves in the early morning and you can leave directly from here,” offered Lady Stanier kindly, guessing the reason for the fading smile.

“Oh—oh—m’lady—” Jane whispered, unable to express her gratitude for this kindness.

“Yes—I see. Very well, off you go. Mrs. Hawks will see to you when you come back and see you safe on the Mail in the morning, so I’ll say good-bye to you now and wish you luck.”

“Thank you—thank you, m’lady,” Jane said, giving her her most respectful curtsy.

She sped through the streets back to Cheapside, joy making it seem a short journey. I’ll give the few shillings I have left to Mrs. Blodgett, she decided, for I’ll not need them now. This reminded her that she had not asked about wages, nor any other practical question, come to that. But she didn’t really care about such things. If only I can have a decent place to sleep and be able to keep mesel’ clean, I shan’t mind anythin’, she thought. And besides I’ll have good food there for sure, and all that clean air—oh, I shall like it fine and not miss Lunnon at all.

When she opened the door of the Blodgett’s, she was dismayed to find Mr. Blodgett in sole possession of the premises. He sat stolidly at the kitchen table and glowered from under his brows at her, his only greeting a grunt.

“I’ve come for me things,” Jane announced, nervously edging her way past him to the corner of the room where her box stood. “I’ve found a place and I’m to go straight back. Where’s Mrs. Blodgett?”

“She gone off to see her auntie and not back yet, and me wantin’ me dinner and waitin’ near an hour,” he grumbled, swinging about to watch her as she hastily stuffed her things into the box and strapped it closed.

When she turned she found him eyeing her speculatively. His eyes slid around to the door and then back. He grinned, revealing the rotten stumps of teeth long gone, and rose ponderously from the bench and approached her.

“No need to go rushin’ back, now is there? Two o’ us could have oursel’s a bit o’ fun, eh?” he wheezed insinuatingly, reaching for her.

She flinched back from his hands and from the wave of ale-soaked fumes he breathed over her.

“Don’t try your tricks on me, Blodgett. You should be ashamed of yoursel’ anyway, and me the same age as your own daughters!”

She pushed roughly past him and started for the door. His hand shot out to catch her wrist as she went by, and without a moment’s hesitation she turned and swung her box around in the same movement and hit him with all the force of her residual anger and outrage at Leach, the leather box slamming against the side of Mr. Blodgett’s head with a loud thunk and knocking him to the floor.

She turned quickly to the door to make her escape and found Mrs. Blodgett standing there, holding her son by the hand, her two daughters gawking curiously around her shoulders.

“Mrs. Blodgett—I wasn’t—he—” she began breathlessly, but then realized the uselessness of any explanation. She fumbled in her reticule, found the few remaining coins there, and held them out to her mother’s friend. “I’ve found a place and must be off back straight away. I only came for me things and to thank you for your kindness.”

Mrs. Blodgett’s hand came up automatically to accept the coins. She stared at Jane for a moment impassively.

“Well—then take care o’ yoursel’, young Jane,” she finally rasped out gruffly, and stepped back from the doorway for Jane to pass, ruthlessly elbowing her snickering daughters backward.

Jane could summon up only a sketch of a smile. Her mind was still in shock, her whole body shaking with reaction.

She turned away and walked up the street without looking back, her breath coming in gasps as she tried to subdue the sobs she could feel rising in her throat.

I must stop this snivellin’ all the time, she thought, for I’ve not all that much to be cryin’ for now. After all, I have a situation now, and I’ve been treated with kindness by everyone for the past few days, and I came to no harm with old Blodgett. The dirty beast, I hope he’s got the headache for a week! I wished I’d ’it ’im harder whilst I was about it!

This anger acted as a better restorative than her attempt to reason with herself, and her agitation abated and the colour began to return to her cheeks. She reviewed the last few awful moments, and remembered the satisfying feel of the impact of her box against his head. Her head came up and her lips began to twitch. Ha! she thought, guess I gave as good as I got that time. Me mam would ’a been proud of me!