Lancaster Hearts (Out of Darkness - Amish Connections (An Amish of Lancaster County Saga)) (3 page)

“
Judith would make for a great teacher,
”
John cut in.
“
She's just...not so interested in marriage or kinner I think.
”

Isaac found the other boys' casual dismissal of Judith to be upsetting. He'd only spent a brief time with her, but he'd found her pretty, and more importantly, interesting. She had a quiet confidence that Isaac admired. He wanted to talk to her more, see if he could tease a smile from her serious expression.

When the call came for the young men to eat, the boys went chattering amongst each other cheerfully. Caleb was quiet, walking just outside the group. When Isaac met his gaze and smiled, the boy nodded, but his eyes were narrowed and his lips were set in a tight line.

After putting Mary and Miriam to bed, with the full knowledge that both girls would be immediately sneak out to sit at the top of the stairs and listen to what was going on the singing circle  as best as they could, Judith joined the others who had already gathered in the living room. She and Esther had already prepared the food, the leftover pastries kept in the oven on the lowest heat setting to be kept warm. Bowls of macaroni and potato salad were stored in the refrigerator. Judith had spent a half hour with Rachel and the other girls washing and drying the dishes, which were now stacked on the dining room table for the fellowship that would happen after the sing.

There was an excitement in the air. It was rare to host an impromptu sing like this, especially with two guests from faraway. Rachel and Fawn talked of little but Isaac, though Fawn only echoed Rachel's words and dried the dishes with an intensity that spoke to discomfort rather than a lighthearted crush. Judith was content to let the conversation go along without her, holding the two conversations she'd shared with Isaac as jewels in her heart.

But as the final dishes were being stacked, Rachel turned to Judith, her eyes wide, flaring out the fingers of her right hand in a dramatic sweep.
“
You spoke with Isaac, didn't you?
”

“
What?
”

For a moment, Judith feared that Rachel had overheard her conversation with Isaac as she was helping organize the loading of the benches after the church service, but then Rachel said,
“
With the horses. You must have said something to him?
”

“
Nothing exceptional,
”
Judith said, truthfully.
“
I mainly walked his daed to see the Bishop.
”

“
Well, yes, of course. You would do that,
”
Rachel said, dismissively.
“
So you didn't get any impression of him? His habits or interests?
”

“
We barely spoke.
”
And later, they'd spoken little of shared interests.
“
I wouldn't have wanted to do something improper.
”

“
No, you wouldn't. You may as well become a teacher,
”
Rachel said.
“
You've the mind for it, and no interest in being married
”

“
I never said I didn't have interest in being married!
”
Judith snapped, and immediately regretted losing her temper, because Rachel's full attention now focused on her.

“
You've never shown any interests in the other boys. Just your Englischer job and classes.
”

“
That doesn't mean I don't want to be married. Maybe I'm simply waiting for the right man.
”

“
An Englischer, I guess.
”

“
Or an Amish man. There's no reason I can't.
”

Rachel gave Judith a long, calculating look. Judith had always been a bit too tall, but unlike Rachel, whose skin was often dusted with acne, Judith's skin had a clear, creamy complexion, a bit pale lately due to her night job and daytime classes. Judith had always been described as having a serious face, strong bones, a straight, no-nonsense nose, and hair with just the slightest wave on the rare occasions she let it out of her severe braids or bun. Judith knew she was no competition to Rachel's vivacious cheer and her soft curves that were complimented by the simple, plain clothing they all wore. But Judith wasn't ugly. She had just as much of a chance of any of them of acquiring a husband.

“
You like Isaac, don't you?
”
Rachel declared.

“
I--
”

“
Well ultimately, it's neither of our decision. It's about what best suits him,
”
Rachel's words were as generous and reasonable as one could expect, but there was a smugness to her tone that put Judith on edge.
“
We'll simply have to see who best suits him.
”

Fawn stole a glance at Judith, her expression tight with concern. Then she returned to drying her plate.

There was an awkward silence, and then one of the other girls started chattering about one of her family's goats who had gone off its food last week, but thanks to God's grace and the devotion of her eight-year-old sister, was beginning to recover. 

Putting the last plate away, and making sure the counters were as clean as her mamm would expect to serve a guest, Judith realized that Rachel now saw her as a rival. It was a heady revelation. While Judith certainly didn't consider herself inferior to Rachel, most of the boys clearly fancied the other girl, who had an artful way of looking over her shoulder, the slightest curl escaping her bright blonde braids, as she looked up with eyes as clear and blue as a summer's sky. At school, Rachel had been nicknamed Summer, as much for her sunny disposition as the tempers that flared from her like thunderstorms over the fields.

Rachel had always been generous, so long as the generosity was acknowledged with liberal praise. In many ways, she'd always seemed a bit unsuitable for plain life, but she clearly flourished within the warm arms of the community, loved and admired by all for her beauty, piety, and cheerful energy. Judith generally found little fault with her. They were simply very different people. But from the moment Rachel had begun to develop, she'd caught all of the boys' eyes. While Judith kept her nose first to her studies, and then to her training at home, Rachel had always found excuses to socialize: delivering her mamm's baking or quilting to all of the local residences with a smile and a cheerful word. Rachel was a favorite, and Judith didn't begrudge the other girl for that. Still, it was odd to be placed, at least for this, in the same category.

When Judith entered the living room, most of the other youths had already gathered. Isaac's daed was also there. His gaze seemed especially severe when it rested on Judith, an uncharitable thought that Judith immediately tried to suppress. Isaac sat in the middle of the group of boys, laughing and talking. Judith joined the girls, who were whispering amongst themselves. Judith usually sat on the outskirts of these groups, occasionally interjecting a comment when she felt the situation warranted it, which wasn't often. Rachel of course lit up the group. She had an aura that drew everyone to her as she spoke with animation, her fingers punctuating her points with tiny flicks in the air. Though they'd heard it many times before, most of the girls, and at least half of the boys were grinning and laughing at Rachel's anecdote about the recalcitrant sheep that she and her younger sister had been forced to drag in from pasture last year when summer storms had lit the sky and made the air boom and the ground shake.

Judith stole a glance at Isaac. He was laughing along with the rest, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a way Judith found endearing. Annoyed, she wrenched her attention away, instead turning towards Isaac's daed, who was chatting with Caleb. When Caleb caught her gaze, he smiled. Judith returned it, not wanting to be rude.

After another minute, Isaac's daed stood. In Pennsylvania German he began,
“
Thank you all for coming tonight, and on such short notice to welcome me and my son. We're grateful to how you have opened your community to us, and I'm looking forward to hearing all of your beautiful voices raised in joyful praise of the Lord.
”

“
Amen,
”
Judith, and a number of the other youths said.

The sing began. Unlike her brother Samuel, Judith was capable of carrying a tune and often was complimented on her musical ability. She joined her voice with the other girls, singing intensely if not loudly. Rachel, as usual, belted the music out. Her voice was passably pretty, but in her enthusiasm she often drifted from singing to yelling.

They went through the first set, one person starting a new song when the previous one ended. Judith soon relaxed into the music, her eyes drifting shut as the familiar songs to wash over her. When the first set finished, there was a rush of conversation.

Judith stood,
“
Would anyone like something to drink? We have lemonade, cold coffee, and water.
”

Hands raised as the group made requests, and Judith and some of the other girls went to fill them. The sing continued as such for the next hour or so, until the setting sun cast orange glow through the open windows, after which the group broke for dinner fellowship. At this point, the rigid segregation of the church service and sing proper began to loosen, as boys and girls, still in their groups, chatted around the table.

Isaac's daed stayed close at hand, his severe gaze subduing the proceedings to some extent. He had his favorites, though didn't state this explicitly. Instead he steered the conversation towards certain women. Surprisingly, Rachel was no more popular with Jacob than Judith. Instead, it was Fawn and another, plain faced girl named Eve who had a large, rust-red birthmark staining her right cheek. 

Judith tried not to be jealous of the attention that the others were receiving. Judith had been foolish enough to allow herself the hope that when Isaac had said he looked forward to the sing earlier, that he had also meant he looked forward to seeing her.

It was only as the others began to leave, Judith seeing to the horses and buggies that remained, that Isaac spoke to her at all.
“
Your mamm hasn't yet returned,
”
he said in a low voice. They were nominally in clear view of the other young men and women who
were leaving, but Judith recognized that Isaac was adhering more to the letter than the spirit of the convention. 

Judith nodded.
“
She'll be back soon enough, I figure. She needs to describe the men who came to our farm last night to the Englischer police.
”

“
Police?
”

“
Sofia, the Englischer who was staying with us, was kidnapped by two men. She escaped, but they followed. They're gone now.
”

“
Aren't you afraid they'll come back? You shouldn't be here alone.
”

“
They were after Sofia,
”
Judith explained.
“
And since we're all sworn to nonviolence, the best we can do is lock our doors and pray nothing unfortunate comes to pass.
”

“
I'm amazed.
”

“
It was a pretty remarkable situation,
”
Judith said.

“
Nee,
”
Isaac said.
“
I'm amazed at you. How can you be so brave?
”

“
Brave?
”
Judith's face heated, and she was grateful that the darkness hid her blush.
“
[I didn't really do anything.] Besides, it was the rooster that really finished them off. Crotchety old thing.
”

“
But you're here now, and you are willing to stay alone, knowing there might be danger out there. You could be killed.
”

“
I could die picking corn in a field,
”
Judith said, pragmatically.
“
It's not something I try to worry about for too long.
”

“
I'll ask my daed, if you don't mind, maybe we can stay in your guest room tonight. You do have a guest room, don't you?
”

“
Ja.
”

“
You and your sisters shouldn't be alone.
”

It was an incredibly kind gesture. Judith found herself warming to Isaac even more.
“
Are you sure it's okay? I know your stuff is with the Deacon. I mean, I can lend you some of my brother's clothes.
”

“
Danki,
”
he said.
“
My daed may not like the impropriety, but it makes more sense to keep you safe.
”

Considering Isaac's daed had sworn an oath under the Ordnung not to commit physical violence against another human being, Judith wasn't so sure how helpful it would be to have him around, but she was eager to have the chance to spend more time with Isaac before he returned to Ephrata. She liked Isaac too well for the short time they'd been acquainted. While she'd always entertained the notion of a husband and children in the abstract, she'd always felt more concrete dedication to her path of education. God had called her to learn, to heal, and when she became a part of the community, she would be able to use the skills of Englischer medicine to help people. By doing that, her daed's death would not have been in vain. Maybe it was pride that gave her this conviction that she was meant for different things than an ordinary marriage and family, but that was what she wanted. And yet, if she was going to be honest with herself, she wanted Isaac too.