Authors: Heidi Hutchinson
“
I've
just never seen you really talk to the merch girls; I didn't know you
guys hung out.” Luke suspected something. Probably not the
truth, but he definitely thought she was up to something else. Lenny
could feel him studying her and her pulse quickened.
“
Just
say what you want to say, Luke,” Lenny replied in a low voice,
“Ask me the question that's really on your mind.” This
was a dangerous game, even for Lenny. If Luke guessed outright what
she was doing...she would admit it. And Carl would flip shit.
The cabin was quiet
save for the hum of the wheels on the road. Lenny thought about
turning on the overhead light so she could read Luke's face.
“
Are
you seeing someone on the road crew?” His voice was dark and
rough, as if the question was painful to ask.
Lenny felt a small
smile play on her lips. “No, ” she let let out a relieved
sigh. “Nope, I'm as single as they come.”
She connected his
suspicions and had to admit that it did indeed look like she was
sneaking off to meet a secret lover. She almost laughed at the idea
but Luke turned on the lights in the cabin and the serious look on
his face sobered her instantly.
He returned to his
seat but continued to study her. She met his gaze without flinching.
“
Are
you seeing Carl?” He asked, his mouth flat.
Lenny's eyes widened
and her eyebrows raised at Luke. “Seriously?”
He didn't respond,
watching her with that penetrating stare of his. As if he could
extract the truth from her by willing it from the depth of her soul.
“
No,”
Lenny shook her head, incredulous, “I am
not
seeing Carl. That would be...” She couldn't think of the
correct word to finish with. Absurd, creepy, wrong, insane, all came
to mind.
“
That
would be what?” Luke demanded an end to her sentence.
“
Weird.”
Lenny finally vocalized. “And very, very wrong.” She
lifted her hair off of her now, hot neck and pulled it over one
shoulder. “Why would you even think that?”
“
You
seem really comfortable with him,” Luke stated plainly.
Apparently
Carl wasn't the only one Lenny was comfortable around. She still
couldn't wrap her head around the fact that she had been
asleep
in
Luke's lap. Her, the girl who can't sleep. Drooling in Luke Casey's
lap. It was ludicrous.
“
I
guess he reminds me of my brother, Scott.” Lenny said slowly.
The tense lines
around Luke's mouth seemed to relax and the playfulness came back
into his voice. “Then what's the real reason you won't come
fishing tomorrow?”
Oh, boy. Lenny was
about to spill. She swallowed hard, lying to Luke left a bad taste
in her mouth.
“
I
can't tell you,” she finally mustered out. She wanted to smack
her forehead with her palm. Why was she so weak when it came to him?
The silence that
followed was oppressive and Lenny thought she was actually going to
choke. And then Luke let her off the hook.
“
I
can accept that,” he dipped his head in truce. “You don't
have to tell me everything, Lenny...just don't lie to me.”
“
Can
I ask you a question?” Lenny took advantage of the familiarity
that seemed to erupt between them without her permission. It may
have been her imagination, or possibly her ego, but she had the
distinct impression that Luke was more open with her than he
realized.
“
Always.”
He answered without pause and she felt a tiny shiver race down her
spine.
“
What
changed in between this tour and the last one?” She licked her
bottom lip and tried to clarify quickly, “I mean, I know that
Mike was in rehab but it seems like this is really important to you.
To all of you,” she looked at him with soft eyes, “But
especially you.”
Luke let out a
careful breath, “That obvious, huh?” He chuckled
nervously and rubbed his hand down the side of his face.
Lenny was a little
fearful she'd asked too personal of a question. But she couldn't
stop herself this time. She wanted to know. Her need to know more
about Luke was sometimes overpowering, like now. It overshadowed her
sensible reasoning to keep a safe distance. She wanted to see past
the image that was projected to the public and know who he was at his
core.
Why did he give her
want to make exceptions to all the rules that she believed would keep
her safe from defeat? Was it the way his mouth curved up slightly on
one side, how his voice deepened when he talked about his friends,
the way he seemed to have one more thing to say but never said it?
All of the above.
“
It's
hard to explain.” His eyebrows raised slightly and he focused
on the center of the floor. “My parents died in a car accident
when I was in fourth grade and my great aunt took me in. I met Mike
in sixth grade and we were pretty much inseparable after that. My
aunt died a week after I turned eighteen, leaving me a ton of money
and no relatives.”
His eyes returned to
hers and she saw something deeper, more vivid, than Luke had ever
revealed.
“
The
band became my family. I'd do anything for them. But we got too big
too fast and none of us were super responsible about what to do with
that kind of popularity. I was drinking,” his eyes widened and
he looked into his lap, “a lot. I didn't pay attention to what
was happening to us. The night we almost lost Mike, I realized how
much I needed him. They're my family, maybe not by blood, but that
doesn't really matter. They're my brothers.”
“
You
love them.” Lenny said it as a definitive statement, squeezed
from her by the emotion she heard in his voice as he relayed his
simple story.
“
Yes,”
he nodded. “More than anything.” He looked into her
face and she couldn't help but see the burden he carried for his
loved ones. The inner conviction and loyalty that drove him.
“
The
music is more than a hobby or something we happen to be good at.
It's who we are. It's or heart-breath, our creed, our passion.”
His blue eyes blazed around the edges. “That's why this tour
is so important to me. Because they're important to me.”
Lenny's heart
pounded at his words. His intensity, his truth...it was exquisite.
She didn't get a
chance to respond because Mike rejoined them at that moment. He
staggered from the back of the bus, his messy brown hair even more
mussed. He rubbed his sleepy eyes and looked back and forth between
Luke and Lenny.
“
That's
not where I left you.” He winked at Lenny and she felt her
face flush as she remembered where she had awoken only a short time
ago.
Mike chuckled at her
discomfort and got a bottle of water out of the fridge.
“
Hey,
throw me one of those,” Luke called to him and Mike tossed a
bottle his direction.
“
You
joining us for movie's and popcorn tonight?” Mike directed at
Lenny.
“
I,
uh,” Lenny stammered. She had no idea what she was going to
be doing that night. She hadn't discussed it with Carl. But more
than that, she was still reeling from the complex emotions that Luke
had stirred in her.
“
When
we park we're going over to the Red Bus, you're coming with us.”
Mike held up his hand to stop her weak protest. “We're the
ones who asked you to come on this crazy adventure, it would rude to
ditch you.”
Lenny sighed in mock
disgust but she gave him a smile. “If you say so.”
She locked eyes with
Luke momentarily. It was enough to cause her heart to stall. He was
beautiful. And not only on the outside.
***
They arrived in
Virginia Beach around eight that night, the buses parked and everyone
disembarked. It had been a long two weeks. Crew and personnel
scattered almost immediately.
They weren’t
staying in hotels for a lot of the tour because they were trying to
cut costs. The band had to prove themselves as a big draw again.
They had decided to buy their own tour buses which helped keep the
crew comfortable during their crazy, sometimes back-to-back
performances. The schedule they were on was hairy, but they were
more than prepared for it. The investment of the transportation and
skipping hotel accommodations for the majority of the trip, had been
an easy and efficient way of getting the label's backing for such a
date-heavy tour.
The band would all
go separate ways tomorrow for the day. But for the night before,
they all gathered in the Red Bus to go over music Sway was working on
and watch movies. Having Lenny tag along was a natural addition to
their close knit family.
Mike could see her
apprehension and decided to give her free rein of the remote control.
He understood the complex idea of an outsider trying to fit into a
dynamic that was already tight and bonded. It couldn't be easy.
Lenny smiled
gratefully as Sway placed the popcorn bowl in her lap. That was
something concrete Mike had picked up on, Lenny liked to eat.
Blake was already
popping more for everyone else. Lenny started to flip through
channels; she paused on ESPN sports network for a moment. She
casually glanced around, not noticing Mike lounging in the back,
watching though half lidded eyes. She turned her attention back to
the sports update.
He watched as her
body noticeably shifted closer to the screen. Her eyes lit up while
the channel showed images of snowboarders practicing in anticipation
of the Winter X games coming up in a couple months. Mike caught
Luke’s eye and raised his chin in Lenny’s direction.
“
Find
anything good yet?” Blake asked abruptly and she quickly
changed the channel.
“
Not
yet.” Lenny replied, scrolling through the list again. She
eventually settled on an old classic movie.
An American in Paris
with Gene Kelly. Mike was a sucker for old movies and it distracted
him from asking Lenny about the snowboarding.
“
You
don't really like this, do you?” Blake made a face at Lenny.
“
Well,
it's no
Brigadoon
...”
Lenny smiled.
“
Brigadoon
!”
Mike heard himself shout. He knew he had just gotten more excited
than his usual. Everyone turned to stare at him. “You like
Brigadoon
too?” He asked Lenny, getting up and moving onto the couch so
he could be closer to her.
“
Holy
crap, yes.” Lenny giggled.
“
You've
got to be kidding me!” Blake grumbled. “There's
two
of them?”
“
I
always wanted to be Cyd Charisse when I grew up,” Lenny
confessed.
Mike didn't know the
last time he had been this happy. He was the only one who ever got
into the old movies, especially the musicals. He saw Blake roll his
eyes but ignored him.
“
I
made my mom sign me up for ballroom dancing because I wanted to be
the next Gene Kelly.”
“
How
did you end up becoming a drummer?” She asked, her smile wide.
“
Turns
out I have a great sense of rhythm but two left feet.” Mike
grinned and took some of the popcorn she offered.