Letters and Papers From Prison (18 page)

When will Maria come to you now? Mother, why don’t you simply hand over the housekeeping to her, even if only for a while? It would be a sort of holiday for you, and I imagine that Maria will do it brilliantly. I’m so sorry that you and she have troubled yourselves unnecessarily with the fur. But in the warm white sweater and the ski suit I really feel quite warm, although it’s only 12 degrees inside. How long will we have to keep on
writing letters? On the 26th, the birthdays of Christel and Renate will be very much in my thoughts. Each of them celebrates with their own particular worries. It is also, by the way, the anniversary of Max Wedemeyer’s
⁴²
death.

Much love to all the family. My desire to see them all again grows greater week by week. Greetings, too, to aunt Elisabeth. Take care of yourselves in the cold weather!

Much love.

Your grateful Dietrich

From his father to the Presidents of the War Court

[Charlottenburg] 17 October 1943

I request you to arrange the release of my son pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer from prison. He has been in prison since the beginning of April. I need not say that it would be a great joy to my wife and myself, who are both old people, if we had him with us at the festival. At one time, on the occasion of a visit to the prison, Judge Advocate Roeder indicated that it was envisaged that the proceedings would be closed by the middle of July. We hear that the investigations have now been closed for some time and with a member of my family there could be no question that in the event of a release from prison he would evade the proceedings. We therefore hope that our request can be granted. From the personality of my son I am also convinced that he has not committed any offence that could justify further imprisonment.

Karl Bonhoeffer

To his parents

[Tegel] 22 October 1943

Dear parents,

I’m told that Suse has just been here with little Michael, to leave your parcel. Thank you, and her, very much for it. I hope the
prison didn’t make too great an impression on the little boy; a child like that has as yet no standards by which to judge such things, and he may imagine that things are blacker for me than they are. I was really distressed not to be able to give him a friendly welcome and talk to him; it would certainly have reassured him. No doubt Suse’s point of view is that we ought not deliberately to keep children away from the experiences that life brings us; and I think that’s right in principle. But when they are eighteen, how different they will be from what we were - not too disillusioned and bitter, I hope, but actually tougher and stronger because of all that they’ve been through. Please give Michael my best thanks for his bunch of flowers.

It seems as if my affairs are now beginning to move, and I’m very glad of it; it’s all the more unnatural that I can’t discuss my concerns with you now, as I used to. But I don’t think it can be very much longer now. Anyway, you mustn’t suppose that I’m giving all my time to this business; that’s not so at all, and I think there is no need for it. The last few days and weeks have been quiet, and I’ve been using them to do as much work as possible; unfortunately I never get through quite as much as I set out to during the day. I’ve had the great advantage of being able lately to read through undisturbed, and compare with each other, the great German educational and cultural novels,
Wilhelm Meister, Der Nachsommer, Der Grüne Heinrich, Der Hungerpastor
(at present I’m on
Die Flegeljahre),
and I shall enjoy the recollection of them for a long time. I found it very useful, too, to read the
World History.
I still like Hartmann’s
Systematic Philosophy
very much; it’s a very handy survey. So I can feel as if I had been given a term at a university with a series of good lectures. Of course, any creative output of my own has suffered badly; but I’m now looking forward tremendously to the day when I shall again be in touch, not only with ideas and fictitious figures, but with real people and all our many daily problems; it will be a very radical change.

How are things with you? Is Else
⁴³
away? What are the Schleichers doing?

Have you any news from Calabria of Hans-Christoph?
⁴⁴
I’m getting on all right, and am enjoying the last warm days of the
year, as far as that’s possible. Thank you very much for everything. I hope your anxiety will soon be over now; it’s high time. Many thanks to Karl Friedrich for his letter. I hope I shall soon, see him on a visit. It would be very good. With good confidence, love to you and all the family,

your grateful Dietrich.

When is Maria coming to you? She wrote to me today that she was going to Kniephof to spend a while with her sister Bismarck.
⁴⁵
She says that you spoilt her too much and that I am to tell you. But I think it’s very nice.

From his father

[Charlottenburg] 23 October 1943

Dear Dietrich,

I hope that we shall soon be able to talk to you again out there I’ve asked for permission to visit with a special request for a regular fortnightly rotation. I hope that this will be allowed and then soon overtaken by your release. It’s a shame that these fine warm autumn days are passing by us and millions of other people without our being able to enjoy them freely. It’s a good thing that there still seem to be warm days for our soldiers in the East., too. In this way the winter will be shortened a bit…

It will not be long before I can send you some tobacco of my own make. But I will mark it in some way so that you know it and can throw it away if it’s unusable.

Warmest greetings.

Your Father

To his parents

[Tegel] 31 October 1943

Dear parents,

Once again, very many thanks for your visit. If only it could be rather more often and longer! With the size of our family, there is not enough time to ask about each one singly. But the main
thing is that you and all the others are getting along tolerably well. It’s obvious now that everyone has his particular worries and a great deal of work, though in your old age you really have the right to feel this rather less. Instead of we younger ones being able to make some things easier for you and to relieve you of some of the burden, it’s unfortunately quite the other way round.

Once again, very many thanks for the parcel; I know well enough how [much] care and thought it always costs you. You recently wrote, mother, about the way in which it always puts you out when something is forgotten; please don’t let that happen. First, in fact, it’s hardly ever that anything
is
forgotten – on the contrary, everything is always much finer than I could believe possible; secondly, I know full well all the things that you have to think about now. I would really be sorry if afterwards you had the slightest worry about something that never gives me anything but great joy. So very many thanks, and please pass them on to Ursel and all the others who share in it.

Today is Reformation Day, a feast that in our time can give one plenty to think about. One wonders why Luther’s action had to be followed by consequences that were the exact opposite of what he intended, and that darkened the last years of his life, so that he sometimes even doubted the value of his life’s work. He wanted a real unity of the church and the West – that is, of the Christian peoples, and the consequence was the disintegration of the church and of Europe; he wanted the ‘freedom of the Christian man’, and the consequence was indifference and licentiousness; he wanted the establishment of a genuine secular social order free from clerical privilege, and the result was insurrection, the Peasant’s War, and soon afterwards the gradual dissolution of all real cohesion and order in society. I remember from my student days a discussion between Holl and Harnack as to whether the great historical intellectual and spiritual movements made headway through their primary or their secondary motives. At the time I thought Holl was right in maintaining the former; now I think he was wrong. As long as a hundred years ago Kierkegaard said that today Luther would say the opposite of what he said then. I think he was right – with some reservations.

Now another request. Would you please order for me
Lesebuch der Erzähler,
by Wolf Dietrich Rasch (Kiepenheuer, 1943),
Die Ballade,
by Wilhelm von Scholz (Theodor Knaur, 1943), and.
Briefe der Liebe aus 8 Jahrhunderten,
by Friedrich Reck-Malleczewen (Keil, 1943)? There may not be a great number of copies printed, so they will have to be ordered at once.

A short time ago my rheumatism was so bad that for a few hours I couldn’t get up from my chair without help, or even lift: my hands to feed myself. But they at once gave me electrical treatment in the sick-bay, and it’s much better now, though I haven’t been entirely free of it since May. Is there anything I can do about it later? How good that you’ve found a regular receptionist!

Please give my love to all the family and the children. I’m hoping every day for a speedy reunion with you.

Your grateful Dietrich

The letter from grandmother Kleist arrived yesterday.

From his father

[Charlottenburg] 5 November 1943

Dear Dietrich,

Your Reformation Day letter has come with a pleasant turn of speed. We received it today. I’ve ordered the books that you wanted. The bookseller didn’t have them in stock, but he will send them as soon as he has them…

Unfortunately the blooms on our fine dahlias were nipped by the frost last night. I’ve managed to save the last rose for mother’s desk. It’s seven months today since you were imprisoned. It’s a comforting thought for us to know that you can work and are able to divide your day up into parts. That will help to make the rest of this trial tolerable for you. As far as your rheumatism is concerned, November is not exactly the best month for getting rid of it. Perhaps you can take a yellow tablet of aspirin or nelutrin three times a day. I don’t know whether the latter can be had,
though. I expect that when you are back in normal conditions and can move about more in the fresh air, you will get rid of it. We’ve just had a short alert. It’s considerate of them to come so early. We are still up and hope for an undisturbed night…

Affectionately, your Father

To his parents

[Tegel] 9 November 1943

Dear parents,

Now the dismal autumn days have begun and one has to try to get light from within. Your letters always help with this; recently they’ve been coming through with astonishing speed. Once again, your last parcel was particularly fine. I was very surprised and pleased with the Stifter anthology. As it consists mainly of extracts from his letters, it’s almost all new to me. My overriding interest for the last ten days has been
Witiko
which, after my giving you so much trouble to hunt for it, was discovered in the library here – a place where I shouldn’t really have expected it. Most people would find its thousand pages, which can’t be skipped but have to be taken steadily, too much for them, so I’m not sure whether to recommend it to you. For me it’s one of the finest books I know. The purity of its style and character-drawing gives one a quite rare and peculiar feeling of happiness. One really ought to read it for the first time at the age of fourteen, instead of the
Kampf um Rom,
and then grow up with it. Even today’s good historical novels, e.g. those by Gertrud Baumer, can’t compare with it - it’s
sui generis.
I should very much like to have it, but it would hardly be possible to get hold of it. So far, the only historical novels that have made a comparable impression on me are
Don Quixote
and Gotthelf’s
Berner Geist.
I’ve again failed to make anything of Jean Paul; I can’t get over the feeling that he is vain and affected. He must have been rather unattractive personally, too. It’s fine to go through literature like this on voyages of discovery, and one does discover some quite surprising things, even after so many years’ reading. Perhaps you’ve further suggestions to make?

A few days ago I got Rüdiger’s letter, for which I thank him very much. The programme of the Furtwängler concert that he went to did make me wish I could have been there. I hope I won’t forget what’s left of my technique while I’m here. I sometimes feel a real craving for an evening of music - trio, quartet, or singing; one would like to hear something different from the voices in this building. After more than seven months here one has had more than enough of it. But of course, that’s only to be expected, and there is no need to mention it to you. What is not a matter of course is that I’m all right here in spite of everything, that I can experience pleasures of one kind or another, and that with it all I keep my spirits up – and so I’m very thankful every day. Maria is to come on a visit tomorrow. I keep encouraging her along from month to month and ask her to be patient, but it’s indescribably difficult for her.

I hope I shall see you again soon and that I shall get a letter in the meanwhile. Give my love to all the family. Many thanks to Anna
⁴⁶
for the cigarettes. Keep well, and don’t worry about me. ‘Good work…’
⁴⁷

Much love.

Your grateful Dietrich

And many thanks for the chess book!

To his parents

[Tegel] 17 November 1943

Dear parents,

While I’m writing this letter, on Repentance Day, the Schleichers, so Ursel told me, are all listening to the B Minor Mass. For years now I’ve associated it with this particular day, like the St Matthew Passion with Good Friday. I well remember the evening when I first heard it. I was eighteen, and had just come from Harnack’s seminar, in which he had discussed my first seminar essay very kindly, and had expressed the hope that some day I should specialize in church history. I was full of this when I went into the Philharmonic Hall; the great
Kyrie Eleison
was just beginning, and as
it did so, I forgot everything else – the effect was indescribable. Today I’m going through it, bit by bit, in my mind, and I’m glad the Schleichers can hear it, as it’s my favourite work of Bach.