Letting Go of You (Anchored Hearts #2) (17 page)

“James, I can’t do this.” 
She ran off with me right on her tail.

“Cassidy, wait.”

~ CASSIDY ~

I ran out the front door and was pelted with snow.  We were in for quite a storm.  Turning on him I had diarrhea of the mouth.  “This isn’t right.  You don’t want to get married.  I can’t do this to either of us.  But, I don’t know what to do to protect you.  I know you didn’t kill Derek, but I, just, I can’t do this.”

“Whoa, calm down.”  He gripped my upper arms and squeezed lightly.  “There’s no one else I’d rather be here with.  Judge Mathis is an old family friend.  True, I never expected to settle down with anyone.  But if I’m going to do it with anyone, I want it to be you.”

“Thank you…I think.”  I felt like a consolation prize to the hordes of women that flocked around him, trying to ensnare him in their web. 

“Cassidy.”  He knelt down in front of me.  “I have no ring, just myself and I’m giving it to you.
”  My heart was palpitating.  Seeing him on his knees like that was a sight to behold as the snow blew in our faces.  “Please, marry me.”  The circumstances were all wrong, but maybe that’s what made it right.

“Get up.”  Once he was standing in front of me again, I circled my arms around him and whispered, “Yes.”  I knew
he
was what I wanted and I was going to work hard to prove it to everyone.  We belonged together.  We and our indecisive, over analytical, stubborn selves belonged together.

Judge Mathis kept it all very informal.  After he and Annie explained the legalities we began.  It was probably the quickest ceremony I’d ever seen, let alone that is was mine. 

“You may kiss your bride.” 

His eyes were alight and full of mischief as he leaned in to kiss me.  It was there, the spark, like it always was.  I cupped his cheeks and held him close.  He leaned over me, bracing my back
as he joined our mouths.  Annie was clapping.  She was one of our witnesses, along with Mrs. Mathis.

“Let’s get out of here.”  He said it only loud enough for me to hear and I nodded my approval.  He pulled me out of there without another word to any of them.  We got back in my car and we were both beaming.  “First stop, dealership.”

“What?  Dealership?”  I was confused not knowing if he sensed something wrong with my car or if he was referring to something else.

“You don’t have a ring, but I’m getting you a wedding gift.”  He winked at me as he drove on.

“What, like new tires?  Maybe some fancy spinning rims?”  We both laughed at that.  It was silly to do any kind of upgrades on my car.  It was over ten years old and I didn’t know now much longer I’d even keep her.

He pulled into a Ford dealer, which I was surprised to find open on a Sunday.  Walking inside, there were only a few people on duty working.  “I’ll be right back.” 

He wandered off and I got distracted looking at the shiny new cars.  I sure did love their trucks and Jane’s new Edge was really nice too.  I walked around the smaller cars and was surprised to see how many options came with them.

“She’s over here.”  I turned my head to the sound of his baritone voice.  “Cassidy, I’d like you to meet Todd.  Todd, this is my wife, Cassidy.” 

Wife. 

It sounded so foreign.  I thought we were keeping it under wraps and the first person we see he’s telling.  I reached my hand out in turn to his, “Hi, nice to meet you.”

“Todd is the Manager and helped me with my truck.”

“Okay.  I still don’t understand why we’re here.”  I looked between the two of them and they both just smiled.

“Why don’t we go sit down?  This way.” 

James put his hand on the small of my back as we followed Todd to his office.
  I sat down, James in the chair next to me.  He pulled out some brochures and placed them in front of us.  It dawned on me what he was doing.

“You are
not
buying me a car.”  I pushed the brochures away and went to get up.

“I am your husband and I say you need, no deserve a new car.”  I was speechless.  “You can pick it out or I can.”

“Okay, fine.  I’ll take the base model Fiesta.”  Todd tried gauging if I was being serious or not.

James busted up laughing.  “Cassidy, stop it.  You mentioned wanting a Mustang.”

He remembered.  “It was a JOKE.  You’re not buying me a car.  When I’m ready for a new car, I’ll buy it.”

“Stop being stubborn.”  He pouted his lips and I shook my head, rolling my eyes at him.  “Perfect.  Todd, she wants a Mustang.”

“Hold on.  It’s not the most logical choice for winter.  The Edge or the Explorer might be a better choice.”

James was thinking, I could see the wheels turning.  “So get one of each.  An SUV
or an Edge.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ.  I’m leaving.”  I got up and walked out of Todd’s office, bee lining for the door.

He caught up to me outside.  “Cassidy.  What’s the problem?  I’m trying to do something nice for you.”

“I know, I just.  Two cars.  You’re out of your mind.”

“Let me do this for you.”  I knew he wouldn’t let it go.  He wanted me in a new car months ago when he first saw what I drove. 

“One condition.”

“I’m listening.”

“
Do you still have your SUV, brand name that shall not be mentioned?”  He snickered and nodded.  “Let me drive that during the snowy months and you can buy me the Mustang.”

“Or you can drive the truck and I’ll take the SUV.”

“That works too.”

“Deal.”  He stuck his hand out wanting us to shake on it.  When I put my hand out, he snagged it and yanked me to him.  “Now let’s go pick out your dream car.”

We looked through all the options and James was pushing me to get the GT500, knowing it’s what I dreamed of.  

“She’ll need to learn how to drive a stick.”

Before I realized my innuendo, I had said, “Oh, I can drive a stick.”  James had a huge grin on his face and Todd was pretending to ignore my comment.  I felt myself blush and went back to the brochure.

“If she needs any more lessons, I’ll gladly give them to her.”  I looked to James and smacked his arm.

We left shortly after and headed back to my place.  As I was unlocking the door, he swept me up saying, “Not so fast Mrs. Benedict.”  He carried me over the threshold and kissed me before setting me on my feet.  “Welcome home.” 

C
hapter
17
~
M
istaken

~ JAMES ~

“James, have you called your parents?  Do they know you’re out?

“Damn.  I can’t believe I forgot to do that.  Give me a minute.”  I walked to the foyer and dialed dad.  I told him that I was released, but
hadn’t given him the details.  He informed me that mom was doing well, which was a huge relief.  He invited us over for dinner, which I accepted.  We could tell them that we eloped then.

She was milling around the kitchen.  My wife.  This was surreal.  She was mine, in every sense of the word.  She was making dinner so I decided to go change my clothes.  I kicked my shoes off and pulled my shirt over my head.  Opting for a quick shower, I cranked on the water and thought about the things I was going to do to her after dinner.

I was toweling off and pulling out some clean clothes when I spotted a note on her dresser.  Picking it up, I scanned it multiple times, ultimately crushing it in my hands.  Paul stayed the night with her.  The scenarios that ran through my head made me sick.  My heart was pounding and I wanted to kill him.  And Cassidy.  How could she do this to me?

“CASSIDY!”  I yelled her name over and over again until I hear
d her running up the stairs.

She burst into the room, panting.  “What’s wrong?”  She looked around, trying to find the emergency. 

Throwing the wadded up note to her feet, I watched as she picked it up.  Opening it, she read it and made a move toward me.  “James.  This isn’t what you think.”

“I think that you better start talking because all I can assume is that in a fit of anger you had Paul come and keep you warm last night while I was rotting in a cell.”

“NO.  That’s not what happened.  Please listen to me.  After everything happened and everyone went home, he showed up.  Cal sent him to check on me.  We got drunk.”

“Don’t you dare blame this on the fact that you were drunk?”  Now all I could see was her drunk, Paul drunk and their clothes on the floor.  “FUCK.  Make it stop.”

“James, nothing happened.  He slept on the couch.  I promise.  You have to believe me.”  She was sobbing and I wanted to believe her, but I didn’t know if I could.  Cautiously, she walked toward me, her hands traveling my arms as I tried to shake her off of me.  “You have to trust me.”

“I have to get out of here.”  I was only in sweats and grabbed the first shirt of mine I found and pulled it on.

“No…don’t leave.  Who fucked you up so bad that you can’t trust your own wife?”

“Don’t!  Nobody fucked me up.”  I knew that was a lie.  I lost a girl to Paul once before, though she wasn’t mine to lose.  She worked quite the number over on both of us.  I shook off the memory.  “I need to be alone, to think.”

She sagged on the bed, wiping the tears as they fell.  I tried not to look at her because if I had I would have caved and taken her in my arms.  I walked out of the room, down the stairs and out the door.  My truck was still parked out front from the other day.  I hopped in and drove, not knowing where I was going to go.

~ CASSIDY ~

I was numb.  I heard the door slam and knew he was gone.  I couldn’t win for trying.  “FUCK.”  I was so angry.  Why didn’t he believe me?  Convinced that someone else damaged him, I shook my emotions off and headed downstairs.  I’d never given him a reason to doubt me.  Was Melissa responsible for his trust issues?  Annie?  Someone else?

When I made it downstairs I headed straight for the radio and turned on my iPod.  I scrolled through the list, picked what I wanted and turned it way up.
What Now
by Rihanna
was playing.  I sat on the couch trying to digest everything that had just happened.  How was it possible for so much to take place in two days?  He thought I was cheating on him. 
Was he out of his mind?  I could ask him the same thing. 
He
was the one always leaving in the middle of the night, not me.  The tears started falling again. 

“AHHHHHHHH.”  I let out the scream and immediately felt better. 

Looking out the window, I saw that he really had left and there was no sign of Smith or another guard outside. 
Who fucking cared?
  I was so sick of all his bullshit and now I was married to him.

Breakin
’ Dishes
by Rihanna
started blaring in my living room and I turned it up even louder.  Walking into the kitchen I found dinner half cooked and cold, since I turned the burners off when he started yelling for me. I was starving and I wasn’t going to skip eating because he wanted to be a dick.  He could think whatever he wanted.  I knew the truth and so did Paul.  Turning the burners back on, I resumed my cooking.  I pulled a drink out of the fridge and told myself that one was my limit for the night.  I had to work in the morning after all. I went to bed at a reasonable time, but struggled to get to sleep. 

~<>~<>~<>~

The next day I got a text from Eva.  She mentioned that she was excited to see us for dinner.  How was I going to get out of that?  James must’ve forgotten to tell me.  I decided to text her back and told her that I’d try to make it, but that I had to work late.  Guilt riddled me all day.  I knew she didn’t have much time left.  I knew that I should just grin and bear it and have dinner with them. 

Cal had called me in the morning to let me know that Jane was out on bond.  She was forced to take a leave of absence from work until everything was straightened out.  He said that Annie did great work and now it was a waiting game.  He said that he, James and Smith were doing everything they could, launching their own investigation
to find the real murderer. 

My phone rang late that afternoon and it was Annie.  “Hello?”

“Hey Cassidy, its Annie.  I went over that contract for you.  If I stop by your office are you free to talk?”

I had totally forgotten about the contract.  Cecily would need my answer soon and I was surprised she hadn’t already inquired.  “Yes, I’m free.  I’ll tell the front desk to send you back.”

It wasn’t long before she knocked on my open door, walked in, closing the door behind her.  I motioned her to sit down.  She pulled out the documents and handed them to me.  She pointed out a few areas and explained them to me.  It was a lot to take in, but the distraction was a welcome one. 

“Here’s my only concern.  When this contract was drawn up, you were single.  We both know that’s not the case anymore.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m not worried about James, but that may change things for Cecily.  I would be open and honest with her about it.  She may request that James sign a separate agreement.”

“Okay.”  That would be a piece of cake.  NOT.

“It’s not that big of a deal.  I’m sure it’ll work out just fine.  Other than that it’s a stellar opportunity, Cassidy.  You must be so excited.”

“I am.”  I smiled brightly as she sat back in her chair.

“What’s going on?  Trouble in paradise already?”

Closing my eyes I sighed.  “You could say that.”

“What happened?”

I was a little uncomfortable talking to her.  Knowing the history she and James had.  Maybe Annie was the one who caused his trust issues.  “I’m not sure I should talk about this with you.”

“Cassidy, I’m pretty sure James told you about our relationship.  We were never intimate sexually.  He’s not my type.  He’s been a good friend to me and I like to think that he feels the same way about me.  I like you, a lot.  I’ll do whatever I can to help.”

Might as well just lay it out there.  “Paul stayed the night the day he and Jane were arrested.”  Her eyes got big, “Nothing happened.  But, Paul left a note in the morning when he left and James found it last night.”

“Oh, Lord.”

“He left.  He thinks I slept with Paul.  Paul and I have a history, but I’m in love with James.  Why is he such a stubborn ass?”

She laughed, “Yup, he’s stubborn alright and has serious trust issues. 
I shouldn’t tell you, but I know it had to do with a girl in the Army.  From what I managed to get out of him, it was the first girl he thought about pursuing a relationship with.  He later found out that she was sleeping with half the guys in their squad.”

I dropped my head to the desk and banged it lightly a few times.  “What is wrong with people?”

“I’ll try to reach out to him, but I should get running.  I haven’t seen much of my kids over the last few days.”

“Thank you again for everything.  I really do appreciate it.”

“Anytime.”

After she left the guilt started seeping in again.  Why was I the one feeling guilty and like I should fix it?  I
wasn’t the one who broke it.  I gathered my things and headed to my car. 

As I pulled out of the parking garage I spotted him across the street, staring at me.  He ran his finger across his throat, like he was holding a knife and I swear he mouthed, ‘You’re next.’  I looked away and floored it, my tires spinning on the wet pavement.

Who did I call?  James or Cal.  I voted for the third option and called Smith.

“Cassidy, is everything okay.”

“I just left work and Dan was standing across the street.”  I explained what I saw and he listened intently.

“Where are you headed?”

“To the Benedict’s, to see Eva and J.J.”

“I want you to stay on the phone with me until I know you’re safe.”

When I pulled through the gate and saw James truck, Smith let me go.  I walked in and James looked to me as he answered his cell phone.  He stalked off, seemingly ignoring my presence.  Removing my coat, I headed toward Eva’s room.  I found her resting and started to head back to the living room.  The TV was on, but no one was around.  I grabbed the remote and started flipping through the channels.

~ JAMES ~

I spent the majority of the day in bed, nursing my hangover.  After listening to Cassidy spout her bullshit about how she
didn’t
sleep with Paul, I drove to the hotel.  I blazed a trail straight for the bar.  Several shots later I felt her hand trail over my arm.

“Fancy meeting you here.”

“Go. Away.”

“I’ll have what he’s having.”  The bartender nodded at her as I groaned.  “What has you so blue?”

I turned my head and looked at her.  “Go. Away.”

She sat next to me quiet for a very long time as I continued to throw them back.  I got up, heading to the bathroom and barely made it there without falling over.  When I managed to make it back to the bar, Melissa had another drink waiting for me.  I glanced at her.  If she thought I was drinking it, she was mistaken.  I knew her well enough to know that she’d do everything she could to take advantage of the situation.

“Not happening.  I know you’re dying to date rape me.”  I chuckled as she rolled her eyes and threw back the liquid herself.

“Would I drink it if I put a
roofie in it?”  She went back to watching the TV above our heads.

“Jill.”  The bartender looked at me as I asked, “Can you close my tab please?”  She nodded and went to the register.  I took the slip from her and pulled out my wallet.  “This should cover it.”  Throwing down a wad of cash, I then headed to the elevators. 

As the doors opened, Smith came walking out.  “There you are.  Whew.  You’re shit faced.” 

I laughed, stumbling into the elevator.  When the doors closed I saw Melissa staring after us and I gave her a wave as I smiled. 

“What has you drinking?”  Smith looked to me and I just shook my head at him. 

“You don’t want to know.”  I struggled with my keycard before Smith took it and opened the door.  “What’s up?  Do you have new information?”

“The video footage from the hospital is corrupt.  The hard drive has a virus.  We’re trying to salvage it.”

“How convenient.” 

“It helps your case, but I worry that it hurts Jane’s.”

Grabbing the bottle of Scotch I kept on the kitchen counter, I took a swig and sat on the couch.  “Stop looking at me that way.”  He took a seat across from me.  “We got married today.”

“Excuse me.”

I told him how Cassidy went to the police station and perjured herself trying to save me. 

“Annie suggested it as the only way we wouldn’t have to testify against the other.”  He eyed me, careful not to say anything.  “Judge Mathis owed Annie a favor and now we’re married.”

“Then why are you here, drunk, and where is she?”

“She slept with Paul last night.”

“What?”

“I know.  I found a note in her room, when we got home, from him.  She denied that anything happened.  Said he slept on the couch.”

“Whoa.  Slow your roll.  I know you have history with Paul and Paul with her, but if she’s denying it…”