Letting Go (Vista Falls #3) (7 page)

No one could understand unless they’d lived with a monster like that. Colt had watched his father bully and demoralize people all of his life…starting with his own family. His temper was legendary in their small town. Everyone knew not to cross Colt Atkins Sr., especially when he was drunk.

“I may not know what it was like to live under that roof…” Rush swallowed. “I may not know what it did to you, having to face people after your father had been on drunken rampage and torn up the town. But I do know that no one ever blamed you for his actions. Not then and certainly not now.”

Colt was a mirror image of his father. No one could look at him without thinking of that menace. “I appreciate you saying that, but you don’t know what it was like to go to school on Monday and listen to everyone, including the teachers, talk about what that crazy old bastard did.”

“It must have sucked,” Rush conceded. “But I see the way people look at you now. I hear what they say about you. They’re proud of you, of all that you and Wes have accomplished.”

“I have no doubt they’re proud of Wes. He’s always been the golden boy.” Colt hated the bitterness he heard in his voice, but he always sounded like that after a few too many. All the hate he’d been bottling up just seeped out.

“You’re jealous of my brother?” Rush asked, sounding surprised.

“No, shit, no. Wes deserves all the good he’s got. The business. Sage. His son. He deserves it all.”

“And you don’t? Is that what you’re saying?”

“I don’t know what I’m saying.” Colt pushed himself to his feet, disappointed when he didn’t even stagger. Oh well, he had more beer at his place. “All I know is I’m sick of the sound of my own voice, and you’ve got to be sick of it too.”

“Colt.”

After peeling a few bills off the roll in his pocket and tossing them on the bar, Colt said, “Yeah, man?”

“You’re better than you think you are. I just hope you realize that before Gabby decides to give up on you… for good.”

***

“Hey, Jules,” Gabby said with a smile when one of her favorite regulars walked into her flower shop. Juliette had been her friend in high school, but no one would have guessed the reformed bad girl would go on to take her father’s place as the town’s mayor. “How’s it going?”

“I’m okay, I guess.” Juliette sank against the glass counter, looking uncharacteristically glum. “You?”

“Can’t complain. But what’s got you so down? I’m used to seeing you sweep in here ready to take on the world.”

Every Monday, like clockwork, Juliette made a pit stop at Gabby’s flower shop for a special mixed bouquet—to spruce up her office, she claimed. But Gabby suspected it was just an excuse for a little girl talk since Juliette was usually too busy with work to join her and Sage for a drink when they invited her.

“I guess I’m just a little tired.” She sighed. “After taking the day off on Saturday for Wes and Sage’s wedding, I had to work all day and night yesterday to get caught up.”

“You work too hard.” Gabby knew her friend felt she had something to prove to everyone who thought she’d been elected because of the good job her father had done during his twenty-plus years on the job. “You need to take a little time for yourself every once in a while. Take a vacation or something.”

Juliette laughed, sounding bitter. “Yeah right, like that’s ever going to happen.”

“You could make it happen,” Gabby said, reaching into the cooler behind her for the small bouquet she’d made for Juliette. “You are the boss, after all.”

“What made me think I wanted this job again?” Juliette asked, her pretty face suspended in her upturned palm. “Remind me.”

Gabby smiled as she tore off a piece of clear cellophane and layered several sheets of brightly colored tissue paper on top before placing the bouquet in the middle. “You wanted to make a difference, to see the progress your father fought at every turn.”

Juliette’s father had wanted to keep their small town exactly as it was, encouraging the town council to veto any permits submitted for commercial or large-scale residential construction projects. Juliette, on the other hand, believed they needed to change with the times and welcome growth and the people willing to pump jobs and money into their local economy.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Juliette snagged the stool Gabby kept on the other side of the counter as she watched Gabby work. “I just wonder sometimes if I’m sacrificing too much, you know? My social life has been nonexistent since I took this job. I can’t even tell you the last time I had a date.”

Gabby knew a lot of the local guys were intimidated by Juliette. Not only was she beautiful and smart, but her word was the last say on most of the important issues in Vista Falls. “So maybe you should look for more help. I know you’ve got a great deputy mayor, but—”

“It’s not in the budget,” Juliette said, shaking her head. “We’re operating on a shoestring as it is.”

“What about volunteers?” Gabby suggested, tying a pretty aqua bow around the arrangement. “You have a lot of friends in this town, people who’d be willing to step up and help if you asked, me included.”

“You’re a good friend,” Juliette said with a smile when Gabby passed her the flowers. “Thanks. But enough about me. I really came here to talk about you.”

“What about me?” Gabby had a sneaking suspicion she already knew, but Colt was the last person she wanted to talk about today… or any other day for that matter.

“I couldn’t help but notice Colt cut in when you were dancing with Dave at the wedding.” Juliette raised an eyebrow. “Next thing I knew, Dave was leaving and you were taking off with Colt.”

It hadn’t exactly happened that way, but Gabby was sure that was the way everyone perceived it. “Dave and I aren’t seeing each other anymore.” It was only a matter of time before everyone found out, so Gabby figured she should be the one to tell her friends before they heard it from someone else.

“Because of Colt?”

“Because we weren’t right for each other.” Gabby sat on the second stool behind the counter. “He’s a great guy, just not the right one for me.”

“But you think Colt could be?”

“It doesn’t matter what I think,” Gabby said, reaching for the iced coffee she’d slipped next door to buy before her part-timer left. “Colt doesn’t think he’s the right guy for me.” She raised a finger before Juliette could ask for an explanation. “Correction—he thinks he’s the right guy if I want to have a little fun, if I’m willing to waste months or years dating a guy who can never give me more than that.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” Juliette said, frowning. “You two were pretty serious back in high school from what I recall. You told me about your one night with him last year. Did he honestly think he could come back here and just date you?”

“That’s exactly what he thought.” It didn’t make sense to Gabby either. How could he have thought that would be enough even if she had been able to get over her trust issues where he was concerned? “But it’s probably for the best anyhow. We all know Colt isn’t the kind of guy you should plan a future around.”

“Because you can’t trust he’ll stick around?”

“Look at his track record,” Gabby said, waving when another regular, who owned a boutique two doors down, walked by. “He bailed on me in high school. He came back, supposedly to stay, yet bailed again after our one-night stand. I think it’s only a matter of time before he disappears again. Bottom line, there are just too many bad memories in Vista Falls for Colt to seriously consider making this his home.”

“Speaking of bad memories,” Juliette said, curling the flower arrangement’s satin bow around her finger. “I was out at the nursing home the other day. I hadn’t seen Colt’s dad in a long time. Let’s just say I was shocked.”

“Oh yeah, why’s that?”

“You remember how big and burly he was?” Juliette shuddered. “Such a menace. Now he’s this frail, little old man. I barely recognized him.”

“Huh.” Gabby rarely talked to Colt about his father and certainly had no idea whether he maintained regular contact with him, though she couldn’t imagine why he would want to.

“I feel bad for Colt’s mom.” Juliette rolled her eyes when her cell phone rang. “I’ll let it go to voicemail. I’m entitled to a break, right?”

“Absolutely.”

Gabby thought of Colt’s mom. She’d always been reclusive when they were growing up, probably because she knew that every time she stepped out, people were whispering behind her back about how she could stay married to a man like Colt Sr.

“I feel bad for Colt’s mom too, but she made her choices, right? From what Colt told me back in high school, she never made any attempt to stand up to his dad. Maybe that’s why he was the way he was, because everyone let him get away with it.”

“You might be right.” Juliette slid off her stool, collecting her purse and flowers. “Can you charge these to my account, hon?”

“You got it.”

“I’ll call you later this week. Maybe we can meet for a drink on the weekend?”

“I’d love that,” Gabby said, giving Juliette a one-armed hug before she left.

Gabby sat in her little shop long after her friend left, surrounded by so much beauty and wondering why Colt was letting his ugly memories hold him prisoner.

“Hey.”

Gabby was turning the key in the lock, closing her flower shop for the day, when Colt came up behind her. He’d been thinking about her all day, and he knew he wouldn’t get a moment’s peace until they’d talked again.

“You scared me,” Gabby said, flattening her palm against her chest. “Don’t sneak up on me like that. You’re going to give me a heart attack.”

“Sorry.” He nodded at the diner across the street. “I was just going to grab a burger. Wanna join me?”

“I was going to go to the grocery store,” she said, seeming hesitant. “Things were so busy this weekend with the wedding and all that I didn’t have a chance to shop.”

“It’s open late, right?” He knew the only grocery store in town was open late because he preferred to shop when he wouldn’t risk running into someone he knew. He hated small talk, especially when it revolved around his family, which it usually did in Vista Falls.

“Well, yeah, but—”

“Come on,” Colt said, grinning. “You know you’re not supposed to shop on an empty stomach, don’t you? You’ll make all kinds of crazy impulse purchases that are bad for you.”

“I tend to make a lot of impulse decisions that are bad for me,” she said, dropping her keys in her oversized, brightly-colored purse.

“Ouch.” There was no question in Colt’s mind that she was referring to her decision to sleep with him last year.

“I’m sorry.” She lowered her head, looking at the sidewalk. “That wasn’t fair. I don’t regret our time together− even if things didn’t work out the way I wanted them to.”

He was tempted to ask her what she wanted where he was concerned, but that would open a door that should remained firmly closed and locked. “Look, I know I probably shouldn’t be here, but I can’t seem to stay away from you, not when we’re living just a few miles apart.”

She cast a glance at the diner. “You know people will start talking if they see us together, don’t you?”

“I really don’t care. Do you?” Unlike him, she had a reputation worth protecting, so he wouldn’t have blamed her if she didn’t want to be associated with him. Especially since she’d just broken up with a man everyone probably thought was perfect for her.

“No, I don’t care.” She shook her head slowly. “For the record, I never did.”

“What do you mean?”

“I know my parents gave us a hard time when we were dating. They were worried about us getting too serious because we were so young.”

Colt scoffed. “That’s bullshit, and you know it. They hated my guts because they thought I was just like my old man. They didn’t think I was good enough for you. And really, who could blame them? I happen to agree.”

“Don’t do that,” she said, scowling. “Don’t put yourself down. And don’t assume you know what’s best for me. I didn’t like it when my parents did it, and I don’t like it when you do it.”

Colt loved that Gabby had never been afraid to stand up to him. Most people were afraid of setting him off, but she’d always sworn there was a softer side lurking beneath his tough exterior.

“Sorry,” he said, smiling as he took her hand and kissed it.

She withdrew her hand quickly. “Don’t do that. Just because I agreed to have a burger with you doesn’t mean you’re allowed to touch me. You’re not.”

She was so cute when she was trying to resist him. He raised his hands as he tried to suppress his smile. “My bad. I promise to keep my hands to myself.”

Gabby grunted as she brushed past him. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Atkins.”

He watched her walk ahead of him. She was wearing a white tank top, flip-flops, and a colorful floral skirt that would have been up around her neck with a strong gust of wind. She looked fun and flirty, just as she had in high school.

He had to laugh when she made a mad dash across the street instead of crossing at the crosswalk like she was supposed to. “Hey, wait up!”

She glanced over her shoulder, giggling. “Hurry up, old man. I’m hungry!”

“Old man, huh?” He jogged across the street, smirking when he stopped in front of her. “If you’re up for it later, I can show you just how young and virile I am.”

“Colt.” His name sounded like a warning before she bit her lip. “We can’t do this. I get that you want to find a way to coexist since we’re both going to be living here and our best friends are married now, but…”

“You don’t want me to misread the signals.” He stepped back, trying to give her the space she claimed to want. “I get it.”

“I didn’t feel good about where we left things last night,” she said, repositioning the strap of her purse on her shoulder. “So I’m glad you came by tonight. I agree we need to talk, to clear the air so to speak. But I need you to know that…” She stepped closer, lowering her voice. “Sex isn’t on the table. That doesn’t mean we can’t spend time together as friends, but there can’t be anything more between us. I need to know that you’re okay with that.”

If he lied to her and told her that he was finally ready to settle down, he believed she would give him another chance, but if there was one woman he could never lie to it was Gabby. “I understand.”