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Authors: John Evans

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BOOK: Lettuces and Cream
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Later that evening they were all once again ensconced in the sitting room. The fire was particularly vigorous because of the gale blowing outside, and the flames were roaring up the chimney. Mike was trying to get his monies worth out of his farming magazine and was perusing the contents once again.

‘Sounds really bad outside. It’s strange how much we notice the weather out here isn’t it?’ Jan clacked her knitting needles ever more vigorously, as though to drown out the noise of the storm.

‘In town the weather wasn’t that important to us and I suppose the winds were broken up by all the buildings. And of course we didn’t live on top of a hill.’

‘I suppose that’s it, love,’ Jan agreed, ‘real winter will be here soon when the clocks go back.’

‘Yep ‘fraid so, I won’t be able to do so much outside then either,’ Mike said rather glumly.

‘But you’ve done fantastic, the place is looking like someone lives here now, you’ve worked ever so hard.’ She said trying to cheer him up.

‘Yeah, I suppose so – you haven’t done so bad yourself either, love.’

That evening the wind gusted higher and cold draughts were coming at them from all directions and through the boarded ceiling-in reality the bedroom floors. And even though the walls were thick and the windows small, they could clearly hear the loud swishing noise from the wind in the trees surrounding the yard. Occasionally there would be a dull thump, as though the wind had clenched its fist and was trying to punch its way through the stone walls.

‘I think we’ll have to get some cheap carpets for all the upstairs rooms soon, not just our room. It would cut down the draughts in this place.’ Jan said, buttoning up her cardigan.

‘Sorry love, but the heat is being sucked out of the place tonight. The warmest place is in the kitchen.’ Mike was rather disappointed with the amount of heat he was creating and so threw more logs on the fire.

‘Nearly time for bed kids.’

‘Aw mum, must we?’

‘Yes, but only two days more and then you’re on holiday for a week, for half term.’

‘One week?’ Mandy, who had little concept of time, and to whom seven days seemed like six months, shrieked in delight.

‘And guess who’s coming to visit us on Saturday?’ Jan didn’t wait for an answer, ‘Nana and Gramps.’

The children gave an excited, ‘oo,’ and like Pavloas dogs, licked their lips in anticipation of the sweets they would bring - children’s love can be often be measured in sweetmeats.

‘Can we stay up later then, Mum?’

‘I expect so, but off you go you two, I’ll be up to see you in minute.’

It was only half past ten when Mike and Jan themselves headed for bed. It was going to be a busy weekend coming up and the spare room needed a few finishing touches to make it ready.

‘I think the gale is getting worse,’ Jan was already in bed and Mike quickly undressed in the cold bedroom and got in beside her.

‘I can hear the slates rattling, I bet there will be a few off by morning.’

Mike climbed in beside Jan and touched naked flesh.

‘You haven’t got anything on,’ he murmured, he was surprised, later usually meant much, much later, not the same day. This was one of those rare times when she actually wanted them to make love. ‘You naughty girl, no nightie,’ Mike ran his hands over her body, ‘very naughty, but nice.’

‘I’m cold,’ Jan said quietly, then kissed him, ‘’warm me up…’

Mike awoke with a happy grin on his face. His memories of the bedtime activity still fresh in his mind. Indeed it had been one of those immensely rare occasions in which Jan had been a little more adventurous and verbal than usual. And at one point had even been on top, so he could, as she said, ‘suck her nipples- hard.’ It seemed this country living was doing some good after all. Mind you, Mike wasn’t holding his breath for an early repeat performance – only time would tell.

Judging by the sunlight filling the bedroom the storm had passed and Mike did a quick assessment as to which job on his list he should tackle next. He decided that even if the day was dry he should spend time checking over the crops in the poly-tunnels. Because the field had been pasture land for years and years, it was full of latent weeds seed –and lettuce eating bugs. All of which, under the shelter and warmth of the tunnels were now thriving. It would all improve with each successive crop, but for now it was a bit of a battle between him and Nature.

Jan was already downstairs goading the children to get up and get to the school bus. Mike got dressed and loped downstairs in a happy mood.

‘Good morning lovely people, and you of course,’ he joked, and gave Jan a peck on the cheek.

‘Oo, nice and warm in here, good old Rayburn,’ he walked over to the stove and began stroking the warm glossy enamel surface. ‘There, there, you lovely thing,’ as he continued his stroking he made silly kissing noises.

‘You are funny dad,’ David laughed.

‘Your father is a little mad, love. He really shouldn’t be out on the streets,’ Jan said, joining in the fun.

Mandy chomping on her breakfast cereals belatedly came to life.

‘Why can’t daddy go on the streets, Mum?’

‘’Cos he’s bonkers,’ David chortled.

‘How about some bacon and eggs for breakfast, sweetheart.’

‘You don’t usually have cooked breakfast.’

‘Well, I fancy some today, before I slave away in the fields all day,’ Mike replied, with mock suffering.

‘You can’t be a slave dad, ‘cos you’re not black,’ Mandy said with childish innocence.

‘Oh yes I can,’ Mike said in Pantomime tone.

‘Oh no you can’t,’ Jan said, picking up the theme. The children looked bemused and a little lost at the humour. What a happy start to the day they were all having…

Breakfast over, and with the kids plodding across the muddy fields to the school bus, Mike lit up his first fag of the day, and sipped the first coffee of the day.

‘First job is to feed Pinky and take a look at Primrose, then there’s some work in the tunnels to do. What you are going to do love?’

‘Finish the spare room, that’s really urgent. But if I’ve got time I could help you weeding, if you like.’

‘Oh yeah, I said I’d help you with the room didn’t I?’

‘Well if you’ve got time, but don’t worry about it-I’ll cope.’

‘Okay I’m off, if you need me give me shout.’

They gave each other a happy smile, and a little kiss, and parted.

However, ‘into every life a little manure must fall,’ as Mikes grandmother would have said.

Mike was whistling cheerfully as he crossed the yard and was in a massively optimistic mood. Satisfying sex had that effect on him. It relaxed him, for a while as least, and his mind was now concentrated on the business of the day. He opened the barn door calling to Pinky as he did so. He could hear her grunting, but in a different way than usual, quieter somehow. Mike stepped inside. He stood still, astounded by the scene before him. Daylight was filling the normally darkened interior. In the roof, or rather where the roof should be was sky-just sky. A huge section of the slated roof was scattered over the barn floor. Pinkie’s pen lay under this catastrophe and he dashed to check her pen. She was unhurt, but standing amongst broken slate and bits of timber. She made a mournful sort of grunt, as though to say, ‘get me out of this mess.’ Mike cleared her trough of debris, dumped a scoop of food in front of her hungry snout, and ran back to the house to tell Jan the bad news.

‘The roof looks fine from the front, it’s the back end that caught it. I couldn’t see anything wrong from the yard side.’

‘It’s strange though, I wonder why just that section?’ Jan, had donned wellies and was now helping to put broken bits of slate into a wheelbarrow.

‘I suppose the wind just swirled around somehow. Thank God that the house itself is all right. It missed the freezer too, and Pinky. Bloody hell, she could have been killed. But the rain has soaked her bedding, we’ll have to clear it out and put down fresh straw. Huh, one good thing though, there’s plenty of firewood from these rafters. We’ll pile it up over here Jan, where it’s dry and there’s still some roof left.’

‘What are we going to do about the roof, Mike? It’s much too big a job for you to do, and anyway the insurance will pay for the repairs.’

‘If we had a bloody phone we could ring around the builders. I suppose I’ll have to drive into Porth and ask around. That’s my day gone for a Burton.’

‘It’s not your fault Mike. You can’t do anything about the weather,’ Jan said sympathetically, knowing how frustrated he got if his work plans went awry.

‘Yeah, I know, but we could have done without all this mess.’

It had gone half past three when Mike returned home. He was hungry, and annoyed that his day had been wasted. Locating a builder hadn’t been easy because most were part time farmers as well, and finding them tucked down long lanes or on top of mountains had been difficult, stressful-and expensive on petrol.

‘God what a day,’ Mike slumped into the kitchen chair and lit up a cigarette. ‘I’m gasping for a coffee. Anyway, I found someone, eventually. He said he could be here later on today to cover the hole with tarpaulins until he can get here to do the repairs. Trouble is there’s been damage all over the place - passed a few blown down trees - anyway they’re all very busy. Still, if the roof is covered that would do for now.’

Jan placed his belated lunch in front of him, and took a deep breath. ‘Um, Mike, I’ve looked at the insurance and, um, it only covers half the cost of the repairs because it’s a farm building. We should have changed the house insurance to cover the farm as well.’

‘Bloody hell, that’s marvellous, absolutely bloody marvellous.’

By the time the children came home from school Jan and Mike were a little more cheerful, and had accepted the added financial burden of the roof repairs. And they were actually looking forward to seeing Jan’s parents on Saturday. It would, for a while at least, be a pleasant distraction from the daily grind, but of course the children were daily distractions in themselves. They too were excited by the imminent visitation and their half term holidays. Jan had managed to finish the temporary guest room but was now worried how her mother and father would cope with the lack of a bathroom and a real toilet. They had in fact put a huge amount of effort into making the house as presentable as possible. Mike still retained the remnants of the old fashioned idea of showing Jan’s parents that he was capable of keeping her in the style to which she was accustomed. Of course if he voiced such an idea to Jan she would have been highly amused, and probably would have joked, ‘what style?’

However the sitting room had changed -changed a lot. The dirty cream paint on the boarded ceiling had been stripped back to natural wood and varnished. The two massive oak beams across the ceiling that supported the bedrooms above, had also been cleaned and tarted up. And Jan had painted the walls a brilliant white - it looked good. There was still work to do of course, the ancient wooden windows needed replacing for one, and some new carpets without holes would be nice – but perfection would have to wait. They had also cleaned up another bedroom so the children now had separate rooms. Which meant bedtime wasn’t quite so chaotic.

The children had finished the snack they always wanted demanded when they came home from school and were now ready to communicate with the outside world.

‘Mum, she talks funny,’ David was having difficulties with the Geordie accent, ‘but I think Alison said her mum said it will okay to go for a bath tomorrow.’

‘Oh, good, I bet your looking forward to that,’ Jan teased.

David groaned, ‘do I have to mum?’

‘Oh, yes, ‘fraid so son. We’re all going. We’ll be lovely and clean for your Nana and Gramps.’

‘Uh, a bath, ugh,’ David turned and headed out of the kitchen, mumbling and complaining and as he went.

E
LEVEN

‘All aboard folks, it’s bath night at the old corral.’ They all groaned good naturedly at Mikes joke, and his appalling American drawl, but undeterred he continued by patting the dashboard, ‘Gee up Champion the Wonder Horse.’ The children laughed, ‘You are funny dad.’

Early Friday evening and the big event was now upon them. Although they were not in any obvious way grimy, or unwashed, the pleasure of a hot bath was, to Mike and Jan, an appealing touch of normality. However they both felt it was very odd to be driving out to someone else’s house-to bathe. The kids were of course totally indifferent to the whole affair, particularly David, who thought it was an unnecessary waste of his precious young life.

‘Have we got everything, Jan? Disinfectant? Sandpaper?’ Mike laughed heartily at his witticism.

‘Yes, everything, just get going will you,’ Jan responded with slight exasperation. Of course she had everything they needed. Hadn’t she dashed around gathering towels and the like while the family had sat around watching the television.

‘Okey dokey, off we go.’

‘Come on in, great to see you all. Did you all you survive the terrible storm?’ Chris welcomed them into the spacious and well appointed kitchen, giving Jan a peck on the cheek as she passed by. Chris did this frequently when greeting women and Jan found it a little disconcerting. She just wasn’t used to all that kissy kissy stuff.

‘Well, we had damage to the barn roof but otherwise we’re okay,’ Mike replied.

‘Yes, we had a few slates off the house roof too, but that’s all, go on in, don’t be shy, go along into the lounge,’ Chris ushered them through.

‘This is ever so good of you, Chris.’

‘Oh rubbish, I know what it’s like building up a business, and a house at the same time. We were lucky; Keith’s father bought this place for us. So we didn’t have the burden of a mortgage and could concentrate on the business. Anyway, have you worked out a rota or something.’ Chris turned to Mike and gave him a broad smile; her unblinking brown eyes looked deeply into his. He tried to read some indication of intent in her gaze but saw nothing. But, ever the optimist he returned a smile and a hint of a cheeky wink.

‘Not really,’ he replied.

Despite being soft spoken, Chris was quite business like, ‘how about the kiddies first, and we can have a little drink while their getting on with it’

BOOK: Lettuces and Cream
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