Lies of the Heart (11 page)

Once he’d heard she didn’t own a pair of jeans, he immediately decided to remedy that horrible offense. But now he wasn’t as certain as he watched mesmerized at the sway of her hips.

When she was done, she twirled to him, waving a hand. “Ta-dah!” Her hair, tied up in a small piece of the rope, whipped around and she brushed it back as if it were no more than a pesky nuisance.

His grin came fast and easy. “You are to be commended on such a fine table, Madame,” he teased, bringing a delicate smile to her lips.

“But of courze,” she said in a thick accent. “Mizz Tezza is the best. Shall we dine, sir?”

“But of courze,” he repeated, trying to hide the chuckle in his tone.

Minutes later, she bit into the thick, meat-filled grinder. She closed her eyes and moaned. “So good,” she mumbled in between chewing. Opening her eyes she briefly clamped a hand over her mouth for a second. “Oops! Shouldn’t be talking with my mouth full.”

Sitting across from her, he stared at her lips for a long moment, and then shook himself. Just the way she moved captured every bit of his attention and had his thoughts careening off into forbidden territory. He shrugged, and then tried to focus on something neutral to talk about while being this close.

Nodding to her meal, he said, “If you can believe it, granddad used to make even better. In fact, his was so good he couldn’t keep up with the business, so he dropped the food part and stuck with the pub…” he trailed off, an idea streaking through his thoughts.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She grabbed a paper napkin and mopped up nonexistence crumbs on her chin and mouth.

“No, it’s not you. It’s just…well I’ve been trying to find ways to increase the business here.” He stopped and dropped his cold cut grinder back on the wrapping paper. Blowing out a hot breath, he started at the beginning. “These last few weeks I’ve been going over everything with a fine tooth comb to try to figure out why the pub is losing money.”

“And now you’ve made a connection between serving food again, right?”

He grinned widely. “You got it, sunshine.” Picking up his grinder again, he took a large bite, and murmured his approval.

“It’s got to be more than just the food, though.”

“Yeah, most of the clientele has fallen off. I think it’s been mostly granddad’s friends coming in day after day.”

“You could advertise, you know, offer specials or something. That’s what we do at the beauty salon when it’s slow. Two for one deals. People flock in then. Or how about theme nights with costumes and prizes and stuff or even a pool tournament? I did see a pool table the other night, didn’t I?”

Stilling, Chance looked at her with new admiration. He hadn’t known she possessed much business know-how. After taking a sip of his cola, he said, “You know, I just realized we don’t know that much about each other.” He shrugged. “It’s been, what, ten years?”
As if I could ever forget.

“What do you want to know?” Her voice filled with trepidation.

Waving his hand, he said, “The usual. What have you been doing? How have you been living? Any boyfriends? And if they were serious?” He tried to slip the last two questions in nonchalantly, but apparently by her stiffening he didn’t succeed. Something cold and hard landed square in his belly. He laid down the sandwich, losing his appetite.

She chewed slowly, eyes downcast. But he knew by the stony expression on her face, she’d heard all right. She just didn’t like to bring it up.
God, what could have happened to her? Who had hurt her?

“You know basically. I’ve been living with granny, as always. I went to beauty school right after high school and graduated the next year. Then I worked in a few different shops, until I met Bree and she took me on. A couple of months ago, she asked Jewel and me if we’d like to be partners, we signed on, and the rest is history.”

To his ears it sounded like she recited the whole thing from a pre-approved script. “And the rest?” He held his breath, waiting to see if she’d answer outright or dodge the issue.

“There’s been a few.” She glanced up quickly and he saw the pain chasing across her soulful green eyes. His middle clenched. “Boyfriends, that is. Nothing serious,” she whispered the last, as if to say it hadn’t been her choice.

An ache throbbed behind his rib cage. Loneliness hadn’t been a stranger to him, either. Then another thought shafted through his head so quick it was as if lightning had struck.
Could she still be a virgin?

His insides shook with the knowledge that if it had been up to her granny then she certainly would remain one until she married, if she married.
She has to be!

Beads of perspiration dotted his forehead. He swiped them away. He’d never taken a virgin before, in fact, he’d stayed far away from them as possible. He could never handle the responsibility that entailed.

“But I guess you figured that out, huh?” she asked softly.

Trying to snap out of his horrifying predicament, he asked, “Figured what out?”

“The serious part. Granny would never allow it.”

Closing his eyes for a moment, he willed himself to calm down. It wasn’t that bad. But inside he quaked with fear. Every part of him yearned for Tessa. Now that he’d realized she could very likely be inexperienced he didn’t want to be the one to take that gift from her. All her life someone had sapped every ounce from her, had used her in some way or another for their own selfish purposes. Her granny most of all. He didn’t want to be listed among the same category. Well, at least in the case of being her first.

Gazing at her now, he couldn’t bring himself to hurt her like the others continued to do. How could he take pleasure from her when he had so little to give her in return? Oh, he could provide her with a baby, easily, he supposed. But little else that she actually needed: someone to put her above all else, someone to protect her interests, someone to love her unconditionally.

“So what about you?” she asked, turning the tables on him. “You certainly left pretty quick after graduating.”

“Like a bat out of hell.” He tried to make the words sound funny, but he failed.

“Was it so bad here?” The hurt in her voice seared straight through him.

Locking gazes with her, he said, “No, sunshine, some things were incomparable.” He paused for a moment, then continued, “But I couldn’t have what I wanted back then.”
In a way, I still can’t.

She visibly shivered, and then shook her head. “Don’t.”

He lifted his hands wide. “What?” Leaning forward, he rested his forearms on his thighs. Lowering his voice, he asked, “Are you going to deny what we had back then? Huh?” A fierceness ripped through him so strong, so quickly that it boiled up and nearly choked him. “We might not have said anything back then, but I’ll be damned if I keep on pretending.”

Her wide shocked eyes seemed to swim with indecision. “I don’t know what to say.”

“The truth.” Running a hand through his hair, he went on, “You can’t tell me I was the only one to feel it, the unbreakable connection between us, can you?”

“No,” she whispered hoarsely. “I used to think of us as…”

“Say it!”

She laughed. It came out on a bitter note. “Romeo and Juliet. Sick, huh?”

“No,” he said softly. “I did, too. In a way. Here we were two kids from feuding families, bound by loyalty, yet wanting to have more with each other. I guess you could call it awareness, well, attraction even. But we couldn’t even communicate, not really.”

“I used to want to talk to you so much.” Deep-seated longing colored her words.

“Me, too.”

“Is that why you always stuck up for me in the neighborhood, because you…liked me?”

A slow grin brought up one side of his mouth. “I think it was a little more complicated than like, sunshine.”

A soft, dreamy smile played around her lips. Something kicked him in the gut. He sucked in a sharp breath. “Even now it feels…wrong somehow to be alone in the same room with you. Funny, huh?”

“Yeah, especially that we’re married, Chance.”

Just the way she said his name sent tiny thrills down his spine and heat coiling low and deep. “I never thought we could be friends, never mind husband and wife, did you?”

She bit her bottom lip and a part of him wanted to do the same. “In my dreams I did. But, I know that’s all they were back then.” She sighed wearily.

It seemed as if they were both lost in thoughts of yesteryear, lost opportunities. He cleared his throat as well as his mind from the missed memories. “So, I guess I never did answer your question on what I’ve been doing since then. Well, I bummed around for a while, worked in some garages. I finally got my degree in mechanics and have been working ever since.” Throwing up his hands, he said, “Not much more than that really.”

“You skipped a part.” She tilted her head back and forth, saying, “Girlfriends, you know? Anyone serious or anything?”

He gulped hard. “Some girlfriends. One serious.”
And how!

“Your first wife.” It seemed to him when she blinked a couple of times maybe she’d tried to stop the flow of tears. Something clutched inside him, just as it had in the middle of their wedding ceremony when she’d found out. He’d never forget the well of hurt swimming in her eyes.

“It’s over. Has been for years.” Clamping his teeth together, a muscle jumped along his jaw.

Her gasp tore through the air, causing him to jerk his head up to face her. “That’s why you became an alcoholic, isn’t it?”

“That was part of it,” he choked out, hating to admit even that much.

“And the other part?”

“Family thing, I guess. My dad was one. Granddad, too, in his day.”

Her brows shot up. “But he owned a pub, for crying out loud.”

A flicker of a smile came and went on his lips. “It was his way of facing his demons.”

“And he wants you to do the same. That’s why he left you the pub. And, that’s why he wanted you to marry me, to face the demons of the families, right?” She spoke slowly as if just getting it.

“To perform miracles, is more like it.” Disgust filled his tone.

Playing with her straw, she said, “It seemed like you worked one on granny overnight. She wasn’t as disagreeable this morning at breakfast.”

He chuckled. It came out strangled. “Yeah, well, we sorta made a deal.” At her raised eyebrows, he hastened to add, “It’s just between us.”
For now.
“But, I guess you could say we both realized that there was no way I could stay in that house another night.” He waved a hand. “So that brings us here.”

“And back to us.”

Something about the catch in her voice had his heart hitching. “It will take some time to get used to it all. Marriage, living together…”

She looked up then, capturing his gaze. “Making love,” she whispered hoarsely. The coil in his abdomen tightened and heat rushed through his bloodstream.

It took everything he had not to throw in the towel and beg her to take him right there and then. But he hesitated. “I don’t want to hurt you.” He swore silently when his thoughts came out without censor.

She wrinkled her brow. “Hurt? How so?”

Gulping hard, he shrugged. “You know.” The words practically stuck in his throat.

Dawning entered her eyes. “Oh, you mean because I’m such a hopeless romantic, right?”

“Oh, yeah,” he said, knowing she missed by miles.

“I guess Bree and Jewel told you that about me.” She heaved a great big sigh, and then said, “Don’t worry about it, all right? I’m not about to do something stupid like fall in love with you or anything like that.”

But by the way she shifted uncomfortably and the wobble in her chin, Chance knew that was indeed a very likely scenario he’d have to contend with. He cursed inwardly. With his insides tangled in a huge knot, he had to make her understand.

Running a hand through his short-cropped hair, he tried to form the right words. “You know, Tessa, what stopped us years ago is still there ’til this day.” He couldn’t halt the ache vibrating in his voice. He rose abruptly, and then walked to the window. Leaning on the frame, he blew out a hot breath.

He stiffened at the touch of her hands on his back. He tried to stop the shiver that racked him, but failed miserably.

“Don’t you think I know that,” she whispered, pressing her cheek against him.

Closing his eyes, he savored the warmth of her, the nearness. “Granddad thought that by us marrying it would put an end to the feud, but he didn’t count on the rest of it. The guilt, for one. The betrayal to the family.”

“The undying loyalty to them.” It was as if she read his mind. For years he’d been programmed to call the Warfields his enemy. What was he supposed to do now? Forget all he’d been taught?

Frustration squeezed his gut. “Damn him for doing this to us. If he wanted to put a stop to it, then he should have been the one to do it. Hell, for all we know it started ages ago, long before any one of us was born. So why place the burden on us?”

She tried to laugh. It came out forced and raw, vibrating clear to his bones. “Maybe he just put it off too long and then there wasn’t any time left to repair the mess. Look, even if he did want to or even tried, my granny wouldn’t budge an inch and we both know it.”

The cold reality she spoke of didn’t set well with who she was. He realized this was harder on her than him. At least when everything was over he could walk away, but she could never escape her granny, never be really free.

Something hit him over the head and he stiffened. When she drew away, he twisted around and grabbed her upper arms. Gazing into her large, teary eyes, his heart hitched in his chest. “Tessa, we can’t—” he stopped himself cold.

“Can’t what?”

“Have a baby.”

Tessa shook her head, wondering if she’d heard right. “What do you mean? You promised me.” Involuntarily, she smoothed a hand over her flat tummy. Longing squeezed her heart, nearly strangling it.

Several emotions chased across his anguished features. One stood out above all the rest: excruciating pain. “Don’t you see—”