Life of the Party (35 page)

He hesitated
“You promise?”

“Promise.” I
agreed quickly, almost too quickly. I wondered fleetingly how long
we were talking about. I hoped hours and not days. Even now, after
all I’d been through, after the sheer volume of cocaine I’d done
that day, I still wanted more. I still craved the feeling that
cocaine gave me … the superhero-ness of it all. I fumbled with a
cigarette from my nightstand and lit it instead, hoping the
nicotine would help to tide me over.

“You’ll tell me
if anything changes, right? Like if you suddenly can’t breathe or
you go numb or something, let me know, okay?”

“Of course.” I
nodded.

Grey sighed and
rubbed a hand over his face, but he seemed convinced. He pulled
himself back onto the bed and lay next to me, resting his arm
around my waist. He seemed reluctant to let me go for even a
second, but I didn’t mind it at all. I welcomed his warm body
beside me, smiling at his proximity.

“So, you wanna
tell me what happened to make your day so terrible? You were just
getting dresses, right, for the wedding?” He asked then, his voice
low beside my ear.

“Yeah.” I blew
my smoke out in a hiss.

“And?”

“And … ugh,
it’s just my stupid family. They’re so … I don’t know. They were
just like, super bitchy all day, and then my mom made me go and sit
in the car, like I was a five-year old on a time out or something.
And for like, no reason at all. It was so embarrassing.”

“Why did she do
that?”

“I don’t know.
They think I’m trying to ruin everything or something. Like,
tonight, when my mom dropped me off, she basically threatened to
kick me out of Marcy’s wedding if I don’t behave myself. As if I’d
really want to ruin my sister’s wedding. I’m not that horrible.” I
scoffed. “It’s just so … it’s so frustrating.”

“Why would they
think that?”

“I don’t know.”
I shook my head and thought for a moment, blowing my smoke out,
watching it dissipate in the air. Grey sat by patiently, waiting
for me to continue. “My mom mentioned something about how I have
this awful attitude, how she thinks I party too much. But so what?
I’m young, I like to have fun. That doesn’t mean I’m going to get
all wasted at my sister’s wedding and make a scene or
something.”

“Maybe she’s
just worried about you.” Grey decided. I shot him a look.

“No.” I
scoffed. “That is definitely not it. If she’s worried about anyone,
it’s my sister. She doesn’t want me getting in the way of Marcy’s
happiness. Heaven forbid.” I rolled my eyes.

“What makes you
think that?” Grey asked, resting his head on his fist, watching me,
his eyes narrowing as he listened. I glared at him again, but he
held his hand up defensively. “Hey, I’m just trying to
understand.”

“Because, Grey.
When it comes to Marcy, I don’t count. I mean, you should see her.
She’s perfect, she’s always been perfect. Everything any parent
could ever want in a daughter, she’s gorgeous and smart, and she’s
going to be a doctor … I just, I can’t compete with her.” I shook
my head in frustration. “Look, I don’t want to get into it, it’d
take me all night. Just, trust me, okay?”

“Okay …,” Grey
wisely let the subject be, “… So … you came home, and you were
already pissed, and then, when you heard we’d be leaving ….”

“Yeah, that was
kind of the breaking point.” I sighed. “I’m sorry, that wasn’t cool
of me. Honestly, I hate that you’re leaving. But I am happy for
you.” I looked up to show him that I meant it. I even smiled. “It’s
awesome that you’re going to record your music, I just wish it
wasn’t for so long.”

“Well, while
we’re being honest with each other,” Grey smirked, “I gotta admit,
I’m kind of relieved to be missing the wedding. I mean, it sucks to
let you down, but I hate that shit. I really do. The suit, the
speeches, everything.”

I giggled at
him. “So do I ….” I groaned. “Maybe I should ruin it all. At least
then it’d be over sooner.”

“Did you say
you were going to be a … ballerina, or something?”

I rolled my
eyes. “Yes. Grey, honestly. We’re wearing tutus. Like, they come to
here ….” I lifted my pant leg to show him, and as I did, I noticed
for the first time the deep bruise covering most of my calf—it was
purple in color and sore to the touch. “Oh shit,” I spoke in
amazement, fairly alarmed by the welt. “Did I really do that to
myself?”

“I was afraid
of that.” Grey’s handsome face was regretful as he inspected the
wound. “I tried to stop it, but you were right between the dresser
and the bed, and you bashed into them pretty hard.”

“Oh, man,” I
lifted up the other pant leg to reveal more bruises and smaller
welts. Morbidly curious, I unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them off,
my limbs groaning at me in the process. My thighs weren’t nearly as
bad, there were some marks and a big bruise on my knee. I winced as
Grey pressed lightly on it.

Gently, he took
his hand and ran it softly up the length of my leg. A wicked gleam
lit his blue eyes as he did so, a smirk curling his lips.

“We’d better
get that shirt off too, just in case.” He decided. I giggled, and
held my arms up for him to gently tug the tank top off over my
head. It looked like I had bruised my ribs a bit but it didn’t hurt
to breathe in, so Grey was satisfied for my health—but I could tell
he wasn’t happy about my wounds.

“I’m sorry. I
should’ve pulled you out of the way or something, I wasn’t even
thinking.” He shook his head. I looked up at him in amazement. His
concern was so sweet, it surprised me. I couldn’t believe he
thought in any way that this was his fault. I gazed into his
gorgeous face, at his brilliant blue eyes full of such care, and
was nearly overcome by the love I felt for him. He was so perfect,
so beyond me, and yet there he was, with me … and I was laying
before him in nothing but my underwear.

I was suddenly
very conscious of that fact. It became hard for me to breathe
again, but it had nothing to do with the cocaine and everything to
do with Grey. Pure heat shivered up my spine at just the slightest
brush of his fingers. I remembered the newfound confidence that had
swept over me earlier that afternoon, and determined now, I decided
to do something about it.

It took him
totally by surprise as I reached up for him, pulling his face to
mine and kissing him as deeply as I could. My muscles throbbed at
the action, but I didn’t care. I wrapped my arms around him,
pressing myself against his hard chest. He responded eagerly, his
hands were warm on my bare skin, making me feel flushed all over.
Almost frantically I pulled him down over me, crushing him against
me, clutching him tightly with my legs.

“Wait,
Mackenzie,” he broke away from me suddenly. Both of us were
breathless. “We shouldn’t do this.”

“Yes, we
should.” My heart was racing in my chest, but I didn’t want to
stop.

“No.” He sat
up, disentangling himself. “We shouldn’t.”

“What?
Why?”

Grey shot me a
look. “You know why.”

“Grey, I’m
fine, honest. I feel fine.” I insisted.

“I’m sorry.” He
stated resolutely. “But we’re not doing this.”

I could see it
took him obvious effort to exercise such restraint. Every time his
eyes rested on my near naked form his resolve seemed to waver, his
fists clenched as if willing them self-control. Finally he tore his
eyes from me, and with a firm shake of his head Grey stood up from
the bed, leaving me there lying all alone. I sighed theatrically
and stared up at the roof, disappointed and frustrated—and cold
now, without his warm body covering me.

Grey paced the
tiny quarters of my room a minute, his arms stretched behind his
head as he took a deep breath in. “You should really just get some
sleep, Mackenzie.” He decided, looking at the piles of clothing
strewn messily upon the floor. “What do you wear at night?”

“Nothing.” I
answered slyly, my voice icy, my arms crossed before me. Grey shook
his head at me and chuckled.

“Here, put this
on.” He threw me a ratty old Blondie t-shirt from my overflowing
dresser drawer. I glared at him a moment, picked up the t-shirt and
shoved my arms roughly through the sleeves in resigned aggravation.
Deep down, I knew that Grey was doing the right thing, deep down I
knew I should be in awe of his restraint—touched by it,
really—since he’d put my wellbeing before his own needs. But it was
so … frustrating. I was impatient, and curious and just … eager to
experience sex. To experience everything. Everything with Grey.

I lay back
against the pillows with a heavy sigh, watching as he took the
duvet piled at the bottom of the bed and rested it gently on top of
me.

Grey leaned
down and kissed me lightly on the forehead.

“I’ll call you
in the morning.” He promised.

“Wait, Grey,” I
grasped his arm, completely forgetting my irritation, panicked by
the sudden thought of him leaving. We had so little time left
together. I didn’t need to have sex that night, I could wait. I
just didn’t want him to go. “Please don’t leave. Won’t you stay
with me?”

He shook his
head. “Mackenzie, no, I told you ….”

“I know, but we
don’t have to do anything. Please? We’ll just sleep. I’m sorry; I
just want to … to have you with me. Will you stay?” I looked up at
him, my dark eyes wide, pleading. I bit my lip. “Please?”

I was worried
he’d be exasperated with me. But Grey gazed at me a moment, his
blue eyes warm and soft, and then he relented, nodding; his smile …
amused, almost. I grinned happily at his response and moved over in
my bed, patting the pillow next to me.

“You’d better
not snore.” He threatened. I giggled, sneaking a peak at his
tanned, muscular, glorious perfection of a body as he undressed. I
had never been so attracted to someone before, it was beyond my
very limited experience to want someone so badly. I wished I could
take back my promise of just sleep as Grey crawled into my bed in
nothing but his boxers, pulling the blanket over his taut form.

“I don’t snore,
but I am a kicker.” I warned him with a sigh.

“In that case,
I’d better keep you close to me.” He grinned, and his strong arms
wrapped around me, pulling me closely against his hard body. I
couldn’t help but smile as he held me tightly, his warmth and his
smell enveloping me, making me feel warm and cozy and safe. I
snuggled into him, lacing my fingers through his and kissing his
hand.

“I haven’t been
to bed this early since I was eight.” I laughed.

“Me either.”
Grey admitted from behind me. I didn’t feel tired, but with his
strong arms around me, I was perfectly content. With my free hand,
I reached over and clicked off the lamp. Darkness blanketed the
room, adding to my cocoon of total serenity.

“Goodnight,
Grey.” I whispered into the blackness.

“Goodnight,
Mackenzie.”

The week went
by way too quickly. I had to share Grey during the day, with work
and his constant band practices, but at night he was all mine. We
would hole up in my room and get high and just … be together. There
were no distractions, no interruptions—just Grey and I, hanging
out, having fun. With every moment I spent with him, I dreaded his
leaving that much more.

I was happy
when the guys decided to cancel their usual Saturday night gig at
the Aurora, even happier when Grey chose to spend that free time at
home with me. Don’t get me wrong, I loved to party, nothing cheered
me up faster than a night out on the town. But I loved being alone
with Grey even more.

Presently he
leaned across my bed, handing me the railed up mirror carefully. I
bent over and snorted the blow, pulling back on my forehead as I
sniffed in.

“That’s good.”
I commented, sniffing the drugs deep into my sinuses. I could feel
their effects almost immediately. I smiled shakily and took a drag
of my cigarette, aware of Grey’s eyes on me. Ever since the
overdose, he’d been extra cautious when it came to my coke use …
how much I did, how often I did it. I didn’t mind though. The
bruises covering my legs had just begun to heal, but they were
still a little sore. If Grey’s concern would keep me from having a
seizure again, I was all for it.

“Your turn.” I
passed him the mirror and fidgeted with my smoke, crossing and
re-crossing my legs, smiling at the warm energy that permeated my
being. He took the mirror from me and sniffed back the lines of
soft, chalky powder. I studied him closely, taking in his every
feature and committing them to memory so I could easily recall his
gorgeous face when he was gone. His cheeks were tan and covered in
coarse, dark stubble; his eyes of the most beautiful blue, his lips
full and curved into the usual smirk. His dark hair was short and
messy, sticking out from under his ball cap. The shirt he wore was
plain and black, he had leather-studded bracelets upon his right
wrist; his arms were just as dark, just as tan as the rest of him,
and they were muscular and strong.

“What?” He
chuckled when he noticed me staring. I shook my head, biting my
lip, pulling my fingers absently through the long, dark hair
hanging loose around my shoulders.

“Nothing. I’m
just going to miss you, that’s all.”

“It’s only for
a month … or so, but it’ll go by faster than you can imagine.”

“Yeah.” I
nodded, though I didn’t believe him. I knew the time was going to
drag by; at least, it would for me. I chewed my nails. “Promise you
won’t forget me?”

“You mean,
while I’m off making myself famous?”

“
Rich
and famous.” I corrected.

“Right. I
forgot you were spoiled.” Grey teased. “Can’t forget rich.”

“Shut up.” I
slapped him playfully. His fist clenched tightly around the
offending wrist and pinned it back against the bed. I tried to
fight him with the other hand, but it suffered the same fate as the
first, trapped in an iron grip against the mattress. Laughing, I
lay back, pinioned by him as he leaned overtop of me.