Lilly's Wedding Quilt (25 page)
“That’s good news, Doctor,” Jacob said, waiting for the rest as he studied the concern in the other man’s eyes.
“Do either of you happen to know why she was outside? Dr. Williams said she was wearing a summer gown.” He glanced at the fabric Lilly clutched in her lap.
Jacob squared his shoulders. “We understand that this was not a mistake.”
“
I
don’t understand,” Lilly said firmly. “She was
gut
today … eating well, talking …”
Dr. Parker nodded. “Yes, unfortunately that is sometimes the case when someone has made the decision and come up with a plan. They almost feel relieved, released somehow that their pain will soon be over.”
“My mother had no plan. We’d just entertained visitors.”
“Mrs. Wyse, how long has your mother been depressed?”
“She … she’s not been the same since my father died. That was two years ago.”
“I see.”
Jacob exhaled. “Doctor … we … we just thought that she was changed by her husband’s death. Feeling poorly, you might say. Is there … is there something else we might have done, that we could do to help her?”
Dr. Parker spoke gently. “Please, don’t blame yourselves. I’ve lived in this area for nearly twenty years and I have a great deal of respect for your people and your ways. Because of who you are and how you live, clinical depression doesn’t typically occur in your community at the rate that it does in the outside world. But it does occur, and it’s a very real illness. Yet it’s one that responds well to medicine and to proper counsel.”
“To medicine?” Lilly asked. “I … I don’t know …”
“Mrs. Wyse, please don’t be afraid of the medications. They are very effective and can make all the difference in someone’s life—sometimes the difference between wanting to live and wanting to die. And, in addition to that, medicine can help improve a person’s quality of living, their daily life.”
“I see.”
Jacob felt her turn to him and he looked down into her tearstained face. “Lilly, we’ve got to try and help her.
Derr Herr
gives a doctor wisdom and medicines that work. Should we turn our backs on that blessing?”
She shook her head and then faced the doctor. “Please do whatever you can … I … I want my mother to have a better life.”
Dr. Parker smiled. “We’ll keep her here in the hospital for a time. Our fourth floor houses an inpatient mental health care unit. She’ll stay for two weeks so that we can stabilize her medication and provide her with therapy before you take her home. I appreciate your support, Mrs. Wyse, Mr. Wyse.” He shook their hands and then walked from the room. He paused briefly to talk with Grant, then continued down the hall.
Lilly sighed aloud and her voice quivered. “I pray this is right, Jacob.”
“It is, Lilly. You will see.”
T
o Lilly’s great surprise, over the ensuing two weeks, the community arose as one gentle, palpable force to bring help and solace and hope to her family. She was greatly humbled by the outpouring of visitors, food, and compassion. It wasn’t that she did not expect the best from her people, but issues of mental health seemed seldom discussed or even heard of. She hadn’t thought anyone would understand.
Bishop Loftus, for all of his age and distinct ideas, was of a particularly progressive frame of mind when it came to mental health. He made sure that Lilly could feel good about not having to visit the hospital each day by making a schedule of other women to go in her stead. And he contacted a mental health organization in Lancaster, established by and created for those Old Order Amish who struggled with depression and other mental health issues. A representative would come to the area and provide counseling at the hospital for her mother and then find similar lay support in the community.
In all of this, Lilly gave thanks. Especially for Jacob’s stalwart presence and openness to talk and be supportive about her mother. His responsiveness revealed a depth and reservoir of grace that she’d only seen before in her father.
Jacob smiled when she’d confided this one evening after dinner. “You have the heart of grace, my
fraa
, which is why you can see good things in me.”
Lilly had felt her cheeks glow with pleasure and kissed his handsome cheek.
I
t was just before Old Christmas, or the observance of the Epiphany, when the community began to circulate word that a new family was moving into the small, vacant Stahley farmhouse less than a mile north of the schoolhouse. Grace Beiler, a widow, and her seven-year-old son, Abel, were coming from Ohio to Pine Creek to live. Mrs. Beiler’s husband had drowned in an ice fishing accident that winter.
Grace Beiler was a first cousin of the King family, and everyone in the community strove to prepare the house to make her feel welcome. Early one Friday before school was to resume, Lilly finished some chores that she had at the schoolhouse, then drove the buggy over to help with the cleaning of the place while the menfolk saw to the roof and other repairs.
When she entered the small kitchen, it was already a hive of activity. The women were having a
vrolijk
, a time of working and socializing together, and they welcomed Lilly with warmth into their midst.
Mrs. Stolis was painting the white drywall of the kitchen a soft peach color. She handed Lilly an extra brush. “How’s your
mamm
these days, child?”
Lilly was aware of the interested but kind ears listening for her reply so she gave a noncommittal shrug. “Better.
Danki
. She should return home in a week or so.”
Mrs. Stolis smiled and nodded as Lilly focused on her brushstrokes and trying not to get paint on her apron.
The sound of someone jostling through the front door of the house came through to the kitchen, and Lilly heard Seth Wyse’s voice. She wondered where Jacob was in all the busyness and was surprised by her desire to drop the paintbrush and go have a look for him.
Seth stood in the kitchen archway with a thin piece of wood in his hands.
“Ladies. Peach paint and all as pretty as peaches, I see.” His grin swept the room, and Lilly focused back on her painting. Despite the peace that now reigned in the relationship between her husband and his brother, she thought it wise to remember that she had not been immune to Seth’s empathetic charm and she never wanted to make that mistake again.
“I need to set up a quilting frame, ladies.”
“Going to take up quilting, Seth?” Mrs. Stolis asked while the others laughed.
“
Nee
, not just yet, but Mrs. King sent me over. It seems the Widow Beiler makes her living quilting, so we’ve got to have a
gut
frame ready for her.”
“You’ll have trouble fitting it in the front room,” one of the women remarked.
“Well, we’ll give it a try. Jacob’s bringing in the other pieces now.”
Mrs. Stolis laughed and tapped Lilly’s arm. “Do you wonder where Jacob is at every moment, Lilly? That’s what it is to be newly married. I only wonder where James is when he’s late for supper.”
All the women laughed, and Seth cleared his throat.
“Ladies, I’ll be leaving before this conversation gets any more questionable on the value of men and where they are in your lives.”
Mrs. Stolis turned to Lilly when he’d gone and whispered, “I’ve heard it said that he’s a tortured soul … longing for true love …” She waited expectantly and Lilly struggled not to laugh.
“
Ach
, so it’s true, I’m afraid, and all his cheerfulness is but a ruse …” She let the idea dangle as the women gave a collective soft sigh, and Lilly knew Jacob would have been proud of her.
C
ome here,” Jacob whispered in an urgent voice.
“What do you want? I’m busy,” Seth said.
“Just get in here.”
Jacob had finished fitting the quilt frame into the front room of the house and now stood outside the small barn, motioning to his brother before anyone might notice.
Seth finally ambled over and Jacob grabbed his arm, hauling him inside the dim interior and sliding the door shut. The men had just finished refitting the barn’s structure and were doing a general cleanup. Jacob turned up a lantern and took a deep breath of the sweet smell of baled hay.
“All right, what’s the big secret? I’m supposed to be helping Father with the upstairs windowsills.”
Jacob reached into his coat pocket and withdrew the primer that Lilly had given him as a wedding gift. He held it out to his brother.
“What’s this? Hey, these sketches are great—and a bit suggestive!” Seth turned the small booklet to better see the pictures, and Jacob smacked his arm.
“Lilly made it for me for our wedding.”
Seth smiled. “No wonder you wanted to strangle me on Christmas Eve. If I’d have known that this is what you two were sharing …”
“We’re not sharing any—I mean, she’s supposed to start giving me reading lessons soon.”
“They never had books like this when I was in school.”
“Hey, I’m serious. I really want to try. But I don’t want her to think that I’m completely
dumm
.”
“Only a little then?”
Jacob sighed and snatched the book back. “Never mind. Go on and help Father.”
“All right, all right. I’m sorry. What do you want me to do?”
“I just thought that if you could teach me some of the words first, that I could memorize them, and then when she tutors me, well, I wouldn’t look like a fool.”
Seth was quiet for a long moment. “You never look like a fool, Jacob.” His voice was serious.
“Right—that’s why I write like a
boppli
, and can’t read, and steal horses, and let girls marry me without any consideration for how they really feel.”
“I mean it. I look up to you.”
Jacob lifted his eyes to meet his
bruder’s
. “Thank you, Seth.”
“All right, then let’s give this a whirl. You’ll surprise that smart wife of yours and maybe get a few kisses in the process.”
Jacob cuffed him on the shoulder. “You’re a
gut
little
bruder
.”
“And don’t you forget it.”
L
illy felt weary but happy at what she and the other women had been able to accomplish in the little house. Once she finished the kitchen, she’d gone on to scrub the hardwood floors, wash the windows, and work at stocking the small pantry to bursting with contributions of canned and dry goods.
She’d been so absorbed in the work that she hadn’t realized that several hours had passed. She slipped on her cloak and went outside. There were still some men working here and there on the porch railing and steps, but there was no sign of Jacob. Then a light from the crack in the barn door caught her eye.
She walked over and would have entered when Seth’s voice, raised in unusual frustration, gave her pause. She glanced over her shoulder, then leaned her ear closer to the door, the better to hear.
“Look, just memorize it already! I am not going to teach you to sound it out first. You’ll just look like a fake. Let her think that you can grasp the whole word! And, Jacob, come on, with these drawings it’s not too tough to figure out the word!”
Lilly nearly jumped when her husband’s voice growled in response. “I know how she thinks. She’s not going to buy it unless I—”
“Unless you what, Jacob?” Lilly stood still in front of the now open barn door as the two brothers scrambled guiltily to their feet from where they’d been sitting on stools near the workbench. They both had their coats off and their sleeves rolled up, and each was flushed with angry color. She watched Seth slip something behind his back.
“What are you two doing?” She used her teacher’s voice and had to struggle not to laugh; they both obviously looked like they expected to get into trouble.
Seth smiled, and Lilly suddenly recalled that his charm was usually how he’d gotten out of things when they were in school. She arched an eyebrow and waited.
“Are you through in the house already, sweet s
chweschder
? I was thinking of adding some color to the boy’s room upstairs … do you mind giving me your opinion on some different shades of blue?”