Lily in Bloom (18 page)

They both stepped out from behind the wagon and tipped their hats. Eric also seemed to be keeping his hat low and Lily wondered if he knew Major Cleary.

“I am sorry for the interrogation. We have been traveling a long way looking for a lost girl. Perhaps we could join you for a bit?” Cleary asked.

Tom nodded and Ann began to lay out more food. The men with the Major began to dismount and Lily felt fear curling inside her. She wanted to run away but she knew it was a mistake. She told herself to breathe. She was unconsciously inching closer to Eric, also a mistake.

Ann turned back toward the wagon and looked at her. “Billy,” she called. “Would you help Jim fetch some firewood?”

Lily nodded, relief making her feel limp. She left in the direction that James had headed, glancing back at Eric, who was still working at the wheel. A soldier had stepped around to assist him and Lily was relieved she had an excuse to not be there. She sent a silent ‘thank you’ to Ann. She wondered, however, how much of the situation Ann understood. Was it coincidence that the other woman had sent her off? Lily found it hard to believe. Ann had never asked her to do anything before.

James was not far off and he seemed to be standing in a field waiting for her. He smiled when he saw her, clearly relieved, then began gathering more firewood. “Get as much as you can. We'll stall for as long as possible.”

“James, how much does Ann know?” Lily asked, her eyes narrowing. Did Ann know that she was a girl? Had she been hiding for nothing?

“She knows you are under our protection and you are to be around as little as possible when we have visitors. She knows we are trying to keep our identities secret.” James shrugged.

“Why would she agree to this?” Lily asked, again surprised that a lone woman would agree to travel with a group of men who were hiding their identities.

“We gave her some basic information and agreed to pay her a handsome sum to help us. She and her husband had very little and when he died, she lost what little they had. She is trying to get back to her family, but she needs money.”

Lily felt a swell of pity for Ann. She could only imagine the desperation Ann must have been feeling to make her join an unknown and potentially dangerous group to try to get to family. While her own situation was dire, at least she had her family working for her.

After a while, James motioned her to return to the camp and Lily felt dread fill her again. It was more controlled this time, with time to prepare herself she decided she needed to throw herself into the role of adolescent boy.

They approached the camp, and James nodded to Cleary, who was talking to Ann and Tom, then walked behind the wagon to check on Eric. Unsure of what to do and, not wanting to look awkward, Lily began to build a fire.

“Billy,” James called roughly, “could you fetch some water?”

Lily nodded. She grabbed two buckets in the back of the wagon and headed for the shore. “Head upstream. I saw a pool. See if it's any good for fishing.”

Walking through the woods, she was initially glad to be away but nervous about being alone. Lily found the pool her brother had referred to and it did look good for fishing. She returned with the buckets of water and grabbed some hooks and line. The men had jacked up the wagon and were replacing a spoke on the wheel. Ann had put coffee on the fire and Tom had his head over a map with the Major. She turned to head back for the pool when Eric stood as they greased the axle with tar and put the wheel back in place.

“You thinking about doing some fishing?” he asked her casually. She nodded and he added. “I think I'll join you. Are the hooks in the back?” She nodded again.

No one seemed to notice her silence and Lily was relieved. Eric followed her along the trail but said nothing until they were out of earshot. “Are you doing all right?”

“I'm fine,” she whispered back. “But I'll be glad when they go.” The two reached the stream and began tying their hooks.

“Me, too. I've met Cleary on a few occasions and I don't want him to recognize me.” Eric shook his head. Lily could see his fist tighten around his pole.

“Is he dangerous?” she asked. While the soldiers made her nervous, she knew that it was just a small faction that followed Colonel Kingsley and participated in his criminal acts.

Eric did not have the opportunity to answer. The voice of Major Cleary drifted toward them from just downstream.

“I don’t see the girl you are referring to. This one has dark hair and brown eyes. There are three men and a boy traveling with her. All brothers.” Irritation marked Cleary’s voice.

“Depart shortly then and keep looking. We need to find her before the Colonel does. She will be my prize, not his.” Lily’s breath stopped in her chest. It was unmistakably the voice of Lieutenant Colonel Andrews.

She looked at Eric who nodded. He recognized Andrews’s voice too.

The two soldiers departed but Eric and Lily remained hidden for a few minutes.

Finally, Eric spoke. “I never liked that Andrews.”

“Me, either. But how does he know Colonel Kingsley’s plans?” Lily felt a shiver run down her spine.

“I have heard rumors they are in business together. If they are, Andrews is attempting a double cross.”

Lily hung her head. “This gets worse by the day.”

Eric reached for her hand. “We’ll get you out of this. We are almost to Portland.” He gave it a small squeeze. “Do you feel up to doing a little fishing? It will keep us out of camp.”

An hour later, Lily had caught three fish and Eric four.

“I had no idea you were that good,” Eric said, clearly impressed.

“Wait ‘til you see me clean them,” she smiled. Fishing had helped calm her nerves.

“I don't believe it,” he stated softly.

“Well, hopefully, it leaves little question with the Major and the other soldiers that I am what I say I am, or what Tom says I am.” Lily pushed her hat further down on her head.

“It would sell me, if I didn't already know what was under those clothes.” He gave her a devilish grin but she swatted at him playfully.

She and Eric returned to camp and set on the bank of the river, silently cleaning, then deboning the fish. She had done a great deal of fishing growing up in an ocean town and she made quick work of her fish. Once they had removed the skin, Ann came over and collected the fish to toss in a frying pan.

“Billy, would you be a dear and see if you can find me some chives to toss in with this fish?” Ann smiled and winked at her.

“Yes, ma’am,” Lily said softly and set back down the trail. They all seemed determined to keep her out of the camp. That was fine with her.

She headed back to the fishing pool, hoping to find some chives there. She was thinking that she would spend some time sitting by the pool, rather than hunting through the woods. As she stepped out of the clearing, she found one of the soldiers taking a bath in the pool. She felt her face flame up and turned to leave when he noticed her.

“Hey kid, you think you got some soap I could use?” he called to her.

“Sure,” she said, her heart hammering in her chest. He was turned partially away from her but she saw far more of him than she really wanted to and she had to go back and see him again! The whole situation made her extremely uncomfortable.

Within ten minutes, she was back at the camp. Ann smiled at her. “Back already?”

She shook her head no, “One of the men needs some soap.” She reached for the soap but the Major stopped her.

“You've given us enough of your hospitality. I'm sure he can do without soap. Just go tell him I said so,” Lily nodded but her insides churned. That would require her to say more words than she had uttered the entire day. She didn't want to give herself away now.

James stepped in, “Billy, why don't you go get Ann her chives. I think I saw some downstream. I would be happy to bring your man some soap.” James grabbed the soap and Lily headed in the opposite direction but she could feel the eyes of Major Cleary on her back.

AFTER FEEDING THE SOLDIERS
and fixing the wheel, the two groups parted ways. The soldiers headed north and the rescue mission south. Everyone was on edge and while Ann's presence had been a blessing today, Lily was frustrated with the forced silence. She desperately wanted to tell her brothers about Lieutenant Colonel Andrews’s presence but couldn’t speak in front of Ann. It was infuriating.

The group rode until the dusk had long settled into darkness and then finally stopped to rest. Everyone in the group was tense. The day had worn them all thin and Lily decided it would be best to eat a few bites and go to sleep. Eric would have to fill them in on the day’s events. She tossed her sleeping roll next to Eric's and felt James glaring at her back. She ignored it and lay down, closing her eyes. She knew James didn’t like her sleeping next to Eric but she was in no mood to deal with him tonight.

Finally, after the camp had long since gotten quiet, she heard Eric whisper, “Lily, you have to go to sleep.”

“I can't,” she whispered back. “Today was...” She didn't have to say it, he already knew. She realized another emotion that was feeding into her frustration, desire. She wanted to feel Eric, to touch him and be touched. It was curling up inside her, consuming her, feeding the flames of emotion.

She scooted over toward him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, then nuzzled his neck. Maybe they could slip away.

“Lily, this is not a good idea,” Eric gritted out.

“Everyone is asleep, we could just...” Lily began to slide her hand down his body.

“Tom is keeping watch and he will notice. Go to sleep,” Eric turned away from her and Lily wasn't sure if she wanted to cry or to spit but she knew that white hot fury was coursing through her veins.

She could do nothing and so what seemed like hours later, she finally fell asleep, but she slept restlessly and dawn came agonizingly early. If it was possible, she woke in a worse mood than when she had fallen asleep.

James seemed to have suffered a similar fate and no one spoke over breakfast. The tension was palpable. They packed up and headed out early. Lily was sure that the group was trying to put as much distance between themselves and the soldiers as possible. She said little as the miles passed and tried to focus on the beautiful scenery around them, but her anger was too fierce to allow her to enjoy it. They finally stopped for a late lunch. Ann went to get firewood and asked Lily to help her. Lily trailed behind her, not really wanting to help but unable to say no. It was exhausting trying to act like someone other than herself. Ann turned suddenly, “Billy, can I talk to you for a second?”

Lily started and looked up in surprise. She didn't know what to say. She only nodded. Ann hesitated, then continued, “Are you the girl they were looking for yesterday?”

Lily stared at the other woman completely unsure of what to say. She knew James would not want Ann to know but Lily didn't know what else she could tell the other woman. “What do you mean?” Lily finally stuttered out.

Ann sighed, “You don't walk, talk, look or act like a boy. Sometimes you are better at it than others. You did fine yesterday but it's obvious, having spent so much time with you, that you are no male. Are you the kidnapped girl?”

“If you’re wondering if I am being held hostage than the answer is no. James and Tom are my brothers.” Lily hesitated, she hadn't answered the questions but maybe she was addressing Ann's fears.

Ann nodded, “But why are soldiers looking for you?”

Back to that, Lily thought, biting her lip. She couldn't say anymore without admitting she was female but Ann already knew. “I was kidnapped by a Colonel. He... he wanted to marry me but I escaped. Now we are trying to get back home. I'm sorry that you have been dragged into this.”

Ann waved her hand, “Truthfully, this is far better than the circumstances I was in. My husband became ill and died shortly after we moved to Bucksport. We had come to enter into the fishing business but I had to use what little money we had saved to live and the money had run out. I had few options, none of them good.”

“I'd love to hear the whole story sometime,” Lily smiled at the other woman. Ann returned the grin.

“I think we had better talk about your story first. The Major said you had run away from home and been picked up by a group of men. He claimed you were related to the Colonel, the one who wanted to marry you, I guess. He must really want to marry you if he is sending out his subordinates to find you.” Ann looked at her.

“The Colonel is not a nice man. He is involved in a great deal of illegal activity. I am sure anyone who is helping him is involved with him.” Lily wanted Ann to understand the danger but the other woman misunderstood.

“I won't help them, I...” Ann started but Lily stopped her.

“Ann, I just want you to know the danger you are in,” Lily stated firmly.

“Oh, I understand. Thank you.”

The two women went back to gathering firewood and Lily whispered to Ann, “Don't let on that you know yet. James will not be happy.”

“He's angry with you, isn't he?” Ann asked.

Lily nodded and shrugged. “He'll get over it,” she said, but she was beginning to wonder.

They returned to camp. Lily spoke little, which was not unusual, and it gave her time to think. The more she thought about what she told Ann, the more worried she had done the wrong thing. Ann had been so confident about her knowledge that Lily had seemed like she had little choice but perhaps she should have held out. She was absolutely sure that she did not want to talk to James about it. Relations were tense enough between them. She considered talking to Eric but was still hurt and angry about his rejection last night. When Lily had been kidnapped, she told herself no matter what Eric was willing to give, she would take it. She did not want to be married to anyone else.

It wasn't that she had changed her mind; she hadn't. It was just that she was beginning to truly understand what it would mean to love someone so much more than they loved in return. To want things that the other would be unwilling to give. She would always be aching for more and she wondered if she would always be feeling anger and resentment. It didn't seem like a good situation for either of them. The thought of not marrying Eric made her heart ache but the thought of watching her heart break over and over again made her pulse with pain.