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Authors: Damian Eternal) Xander's Chance (#1

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“We’ll stay in tonight, so you can tell me what’s going on,” Xander added.

“No,” she said quickly. “We can’t stay in. We’re going to the after party. Then I’m quitting for real, never to see any of you ever again.”

“Any of us.” His gaze sharpened. “What did Jenn want?”

“It’s none of your business, Xander.”

The dangerous edge crept into him. It made her want to run even faster.

“You don’t like that, do you?” she asked softly.

“No.”

“It sucks not being able to read the minds of those around you. You never know who to trust or who wants to hurt you,” she said. “Welcome to my world, Xander.” Upset, Jessi rose and walked away.

She wasn’t certain if he’d follow or not. Jessi did her best to compose herself as she returned to the food court. Ashley and Brandon were still at the table with all of Ashley’s friends. Jessi forced a smile as she approached. Ashley’s eyes glowed, and Jessi hated herself for wanting to leave or prevent her cousin from ever seeing Xander again, when it clearly made her happy.

“You guys ready?” she asked.

Ashley grinned. “I get to drive!”

“I heard.” Jessi dug the keys out of her purse and handed them over.

“Xander said he’s taking us to dinner,” Brandon said. “He’s so awesome, Jessi!”

Internally, she was cursing the vampire. Her cousins had no clue what he was or what she was involved with.

“Great,” she managed. “Let’s find the jackass and go.”

The teen girls tittered at her light-hearted curse. Ashley and Brandon stood faster than they ever had when she told them their time at the mall was up. Jessi didn’t have to look to know where Xander was; a look of awe crept into the faces of both teens.

 

Chapter Twelve

 

Xander sat on the bench until he regained his temper. Jessi was right. While he was intrigued by an interaction with someone he couldn’t predict, he was also furious that he wasn’t able to read her mind when he knew something bad was going on. Any other woman would be whimpering at his feet, ready to tell him her life story, if he cared enough to ask.

He did ask this woman, and she politely told him to fuck off and walked away. The woman made his blood burn in more ways than one. Unaccustomed to emotions he wasn’t able to control, he watched her hips sway but stayed where he was. His anger was as strong as his desire.

Jenn hadn’t left. He knew she was with Jessi and hated the idea for reasons that weren’t rational. Jenn was as responsible for protecting Naturals as Xander was turning them into vampires. If anything, Jessi was safer with Jenn than she was with him.

“You think you’re safe in a public place, Guardian?” he asked, sensing her stealthy approach.

Jenn appeared in his peripheral then crossed to sit at the bench across from him. Tall and lean, the Guardian was one of the strongest he knew. Her mind control power was second only to his, and she fought like a warrior. Sexy, dark-haired with long legs, Jenn was also wary.

“I figured I’d rather talk to you here than have you hunt me down,” she replied with candidness that marked their history of open hostility.

“Smart, as always,” he said. “You were my next stop.”

“I figured as much.”

“What do you want?”

“What do
you
want, Xander?” Jenn shot back. “You should’ve turned over this girl and her cousins to Jule.”

“She amuses me.”

“She’s in danger.”

“From whom?”

“Oh, she hasn’t told you?” Jenn asked innocently. “I wonder why she doesn’t trust you.”

“If there is any part of you that doubts I’ll make a scene, keep talking like that.”

His low growl made Jenn shift and stretch a hand to the small of her back, where she probably had at least one weapon stashed.

“She didn’t tell me,” Jenn said. “From what Jule said and the fact your girl knows Jonny, I’d say the Black God is using her to get to you. I don’t have any idea why.”

Xander did. It had to do with the necklace he wore beneath the t-shirt, one Jonny would find useful. What Xander didn’t yet understand: how Jonny knew something he shouldn’t.

“I can take Jonny,” he said.

“You shouldn’t take Jonny. You of all people understand how things should work.”

He said nothing, studying Jenn. They both spent weeks with the Black God, after the teenage godslayer took out the former Black God and took his place. Jonny was a good kid who had to go bad in order to control the vamps at his disposal and counter the White God’s influence. The two Gods kept each other in check.

Jonny hadn’t had the ability to lead or commit evil or balance Damian, when Xander and Jenn entered the picture. Jenn wanted to salvage him; Xander knew Jonny needed to be pushed to the side of evil. More concerned about the bigger picture, Xander interfered when necessary and spent the rest of this time toying with Jenn and the other Guardians.

In the end, everyone hated him, and he lost no sleep over it.

“You see that now,” he said.

“I think I always did. The compassionate side of me hates to see good people turned bad.”

“Choices, Jenn,” he reminded her. “Jonny didn’t have to do what he did.”

“You would’ve pushed him down that path eventually.”

“I can handle Jonny,” he said. “I can’t predict
her.

“I know. That’s why we’re pressuring her as well. If she doesn’t find you an option, she will consider us one.”

The second woman in ten minutes to piss him off. Xander didn’t like what he heard at all, that Jessi might
not
come to him for help. He wasn’t certain why it mattered, except that he wasn’t about to lose this round to Damian or Jenn.

“Sofi read her,” Jenn said.

“You took her to the Oracle?”

“I know you’re not a fan, but Sofi is damned good at what she does. She won’t tell us what she told Jessi, though,” Jenn said.

“There’s no telling with that woman.” Xander’s mood was growing worse. Powerful and tiny, Sofi’s agenda was as secretive as his.

“One more thing. We’ve got rumblings that Jonny’s going to try to take you out. We’re fuzzy on the dates and times, but he’s planning something tonight and Friday afternoon. That’s it,” Jenn said. “I’m done confessing. For the record, I’m only talking to you because I like Jessi, not because I think any better of you.”

“I’m in the mood to take off someone’s head.”

Jenn stood smoothly and quickly at the hint, no doubt reminded of their many sparring sessions. Except Xander wasn’t done with her yet.

“You look good for a pregnant chic,” he said, leaning back.

She went rigid. He heard her muttering curses at him under her breath. She faced him once more.

“It’s none of your damn business, Xander!” she snapped.

“You’ve known for three weeks.” He pried the information from her mind. “Yet you haven’t told Darian.”

She was almost tense enough to attack him, public mall or not. With effort, she released a breath and sat back down. Jenn fingered the necklace around her neck, the one Darian gave her months before, when they became an official couple.

“It’s not lying if you just don’t say something, right?” she reasoned.

“He might not agree. A secret is a lie on some level.” Xander considered, thoughts on Jessi’s secrets.

Jenn met his gaze, surprised.

“Good leverage for me,” he added.

“That was the real Xander again, wasn’t it?” She studied him. “Not the shitty side of you I normally get.”

“Darlin’, it’s all real,” he replied.

“Maybe I should say the other side of you, then. Hey, Xander, can I ask you something?” she asked.

“No guarantees I’ll answer.”

“I’ve never been able to figure out if I should hate you or thank you for what happened in the immortal realm,” she started. “You saved my life then turned around and left me to die.”

He waited.

She gazed at him expectantly.

“What’s your question?” he asked.

“You can read my mind. Do I have to spell it out?”

“Darian already knows you’re pregnant. He’s waiting for you to tell him when you’re ready,” Xander said, ignoring her question.

She groaned. “Are you serious?”

“Yep.”

“You’re not going to answer me?”

“Why does it matter?” Xander leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees.

“Maybe it doesn’t.” A troubled look crossed Jenn’s features. She grappled with his question for a moment. He was patient, still dealing with his own anger issues. “You fucked me up good when we were with Jonny for all those weeks. I didn’t understand what you were doing until after. It made me think maybe you’re salvageable.”

Xander smiled. “I don’t need saving. What I am, is who I want to be.”

“What about this girl, Jessi?” She studied him.

“What about her?”

“She does need saving, Xander. You sort of saved me. Or maybe, you knew someone else would. I don’t think she has that luxury.”

“You want to know the truth?” he asked. “You won’t like it.” Unable to decide what his level of involvement with Jessi should be, Xander wasn’t about to admit anything to Jenn.

She grimaced but waved for him to continue.

“Sofi was right. I would’ve left you in the immortal world, if she didn’t force me to make the promise to help you.”

Red crept up Jenn’s face, and her eyes glittered. She thought hard for a moment.

“Don’t attribute good intentions to someone whose agenda is far more … complex,” he advised.

“Did you know I’d survive, even if you left me?”

“Again, why does it matter?”

“Because I want to know. It matters to me, whether or not you think it should!”

“You don’t need the answer, Jenn,” Xander said firmly.

“Who made my life your decision?” she demanded.

“Whatever you’re going through has nothing to do with a brush with death in the immortal world. Or me,” he replied.

She stared at him. “Damn you, Xander. You can’t just answer the question
for once
?”

“You survived, didn’t you?”

“Okay. You did it again,” Jenn said with effort. “Steered me away from what I wanted to know. What about Jessi?”

“She’ll survive,” he replied.

“That’s all I needed. You had to make this so fucking difficult, Xander,” Jenn said.

Entertained by her exasperation, Xander’s anger subsided.

“I didn’t tell Darian for the same reason you wouldn’t tell me about Jessi,” she said, standing. “I’m scared shitless. I lost a daughter during the Schism. I can’t go through that again. Whoever you lost, you’re just as scared you’ll lose Jessi, if you let yourself fall for her.”

Xander didn’t remember what fear felt like. It wasn’t what bothered him about Jessi, though he remembered why he long ago took a vow never to let anyone close to him. Maybe the level of discomfort he experienced about having something in his life not fully under his influence was what Jenn attributed as fear in hers.

Or maybe she was right, and he was avoiding the obvious, because he couldn’t quite handle the thought of being vulnerable to anyone. He didn’t become the most powerful creature in either realm to let a quick-witted woman with a bright smile and big heart bring him to his knees.

Jenn started to move away.

“It’s a boy,” he said over his shoulder.

“Are you fucking with me?”

“No.”

Without another word, she left.

Everything he’d suspected was true: Jessi’s enemy was none other than the Black God, who sent her after the only belonging Xander had. Jessi’s sudden change of heart about wanting to go out tonight made more sense after Jenn’s warning.

Was Jessi setting him up?

Xander waited until this bout of anger settled enough for him to deal with the woman who frustrated him then rose, making his way back to the food court.

The teens were ready when he reached the food court. Jessi didn’t look at him, but her cousins crowded him. For their sake, Xander subdued the lethal instinct that made him want to snatch Jessi, haul her away somewhere quiet and do whatever it took to pull the truth from her. She led them through the mall towards the entrance, while her cousins talked.

“She’s mad,” Ashley said. “Maybe we can put her in the trunk.”

“I like that idea,” Xander agreed.

“Jessi does so much for us,” Brandon replied. “You need to be nicer, Ashley.”

Ashley rolled her eyes. “I didn’t do anything this time.”

“I did,” Xander said. “Of the three of us, I’m pretty sure she’s pissed at me.”

Brandon looked up at him. Xander suspected the protective older brother was about to say something to him about upsetting Jessi. Both were Naturals. Brandon was much like Jessi: undetectable from more than three feet away with a mind Xander was unable to penetrate. He’d have to test her reflexes to be certain, but Ashley was similar to Jenn: a warrior, only Ashley didn’t know it yet.

If Xander knew and Jule knew, so did Damian, the White God. Jenn was probably waiting for his guard to drop, so she could snatch all three.

Which pissed Xander off even more.

“You should just sleep with her and get it over with,” Brandon said at last.

“If it were only that easy,” Xander said with a snort.

Ashley appeared stunned then embarrassed.

“It’s kinda obvious, Ashley,” Brandon said.

Xander glanced at the kid, entertained. Brandon flushed, confirming the instinct that he wasn’t as pure as his cousin thought. Ashley, on the other hand, was still a virgin, and Xander guessed her brother was as responsible for that as Jessi’s lectures.

“Are you even dating?” Ashley asked him, confused. “She said you weren’t.”

“It’s complicated,” Xander replied. “She doesn’t know what she wants, and she’s trying to protect you both from some psycho vampire TV star.”

“Oh.” Ashley frowned. “Oh, Brandon, is that why she hasn’t dated since she took us in?”

“Probably,” Brandon replied with a shrug. “All she does is work.”

“It’s our fault.” The teen girl was pensive for a moment. “Xander, you have to date her.”

“Really,” he said. “Why’s that?”

“Because she’s probably lonely, and I feel bad that we’re the reason she doesn’t date,” Ashley rationalized. “So you should date her.”

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