Love Inspired Historical November 2014 (59 page)

“No, I quit believing the day Sally died.” Nellie allowed the tears to fall down her chin. A sob caught in her throat, and she turned back to the fireplace. “After our parents died, Sally asked me to take Molly in should something happen to her and John.” Silence hung between them.

Leah wanted to allow Nellie the opportunity to let her past hurts work their way out of the grieving woman. She remembered being told once that it was best to listen when someone hurting is talking because it could help them heal.

Nellie sighed heavily and turned back to face Leah. “That's why I'm here. I am going to take Molly away from Jake. I'm going to remove all this foolishness of a God who cares for her from her memories. She's still young and can be taught differently.”

The mother bear arose in Leah. She stood to her full height and said, “I know you are hurting, Nellie and I can respect that, but rest assured, Molly is not going with you.”

Nellie laughed. “Oh, and are you going to stop me? You have no legal claim to that little girl up there. I do. You're not even related, I am.” She pushed past Leah and walked to the foot of the stairs.

Leah said a silent prayer for help. She couldn't, wouldn't let Nellie have Molly. “Nellie, I'm going to prove that there is a God.”

She turned at the foot of the stairs, and a wobbly simper twitched at Nellie's lips. “Really? How?”

Leah knew she couldn't do anything but she had a God who could. “I'm going to pray and ask God to keep you from taking that child from her uncle. I'm also going to ask Him to help you find your way back to the God who loves you.”

Nellie shook her head. “Pray all you want, Leah. We'll see if there is a God who loves you enough to answer your prayers. Don't be surprised when I ride out of here tomorrow with Molly by my side.”

* * *

Jake walked down the stairs slowly. He stopped right behind Nellie. Keeping his voice much calmer than he felt, Jake said, “You aren't taking Molly anywhere, Nellie.”

She spun around looking wild-eyed. “How dare you sneak up on me!”

When had Nellie become such a dramatic personality? He remembered her being sweet and quiet, like Sally. “I walked down the stairs, Nellie. That's hardly sneaking up on you. Now, what makes you think I'll let you take Molly away?”

Steely green eyes glared up at him. “You don't have a choice. My sister asked me to take care of Molly and I intend to do just that. I'd thought about letting you and Leah keep her, but after tonight, listening to all this talk about God and reading the Bible, well, she's better off living with me and knowing the truth. There is no God.” It sounded as if she were trying to convince herself more than him.

“Aunt Nellie?”

Jake turned to find Molly standing at the top of the stairs. Her hair was down and the light from the bedroom shone behind her, giving the little girl an angelic appearance.

“God is real.” Molly held on to the railing as she walked down the stairs.

Nellie's voice softened as she watched Molly's descent. “Honey, you are mistaken.”

“No, I'm not. The night Mama died. I prayed and talked to God. I know Mommy is in heaven. She's waiting for us all to get there.” Molly took Nellie's hand in hers. “I feel her in here.” She pressed Nellie's hand against her heart.

Tears rolled down Nellie's face. She hugged Molly to her and wept.

Marshall came down the stairs, brushed past Jake and hurried to his wife's side. He gently pulled her into his arms. “Come along, dear.”

Nellie released Molly and offered her a gentle smile. “Thank you, Molly. I feel her in here, too.” She laid her hand against her own heart, then Nellie allowed her husband to lead her up the stairs.

* * *

The next morning, Jake entered the house long before anyone else was usually awake. He'd tossed and turned all night. Nellie could still insist on taking Molly and that worried him. His hand moved to the letter in his shirt pocket. If he had to, Jake would use it to keep the little girl with him. He loved Molly as much as he could love anyone and he wasn't about to let her go.

Nellie and Marshall came out of the kitchen. She wore a deep green robe that picked up the color in her eyes. A gasp tore from her throat when she saw him. “Oh, I wasn't expecting anyone else up this early.” Her hand went to her neck.

“Good morning, Nellie, Marshall.” He stood staring at her. She looked so much like Sally that for a moment Jake allowed himself just to stare at her.

Marshall carried the coffeepot and two cups in his hands. “I made coffee, if you'd like a cup,” he offered.

Jake took a deep breath. “I believe I will. Please, stay down here. I'd like to talk for a few minutes.” When they nodded their acceptance of his invitation, Jake pulled out a chair and sat down.

“Give me just a moment and I'll get another cup.” Marshall set the coffeepot and the other two mugs down and then hurried back into the kitchen.

Jake tried to get control of his emotions. The last thing he wanted was bad blood between himself and Nellie. Molly needed her aunt as much as she needed him. Family was important; he just wished he'd realized it sooner and had made peace with his brother and Sally.

Nellie sat down at the end of the table when Marshall returned. Marshall poured her coffee and then gave a cup to Jake.

She cupped the coffee between her palms. “I think I know what you are going to say, Jake, and you are right.”

Her words took him by surprise. “What am I right about?” He slipped into the chair beside her.

“Marshall and I have been talking and we believe Molly should stay with you and Leah.” Nellie offered a soft smile before taking a sip from her coffee.

Jake wasn't sure what to say. He'd been prepared to fight for the little girl. His gaze moved to Nellie's face. Was it his imagination or had it softened during the night?

“Marshall assures me that I was wrong in so many ways.” She shook her head. “And thanks to Molly I feel differently about so many things, but change isn't going to happen overnight. Marshall and I prayed together last night for the first time in a long time.” She reached out and took her husband's hand. “But I think I'll need many more prayer sessions to become the woman I want to be. I still don't understand why God would take Sally, but I'm trying.”

Jake wasn't sure what to say. He took a sip from his coffee and nodded, understanding Nellie's words. Hadn't he behaved much the same way when he'd first learned of John and Sally's marriage? He'd wanted to blame God but with time realized John and Sally had been the ones to hurt him, not God.

Marshall patted the top of her hand. Nellie looked into her coffee. “I don't know how this man has stood by me over the last year. I've been mean and rude to him so much but he still put up with me.”

“What about God? Do you still think He's not real?” Jake had to know. If there was some way he could convince Nellie of the one true God, he wanted to do it.

She smiled. “I always knew He was real. I just didn't want to trust Him anymore. As strange as it sounds, after Sally died, I didn't think He loved me anymore.” Her voice caught in her throat.

“That doesn't sound strange at all.” Jake set his cup down. “Right after Sally and John married I lost my way for a while, too. I guess it's human nature, but I am so glad God can forgive us and keep on loving us.”

She patted his hand. “Yeah, me, too.”

He released her hand. “You are always welcome to visit Molly.”

“Thank you, Jake.”

They talked for a few more minutes and then he finished his coffee and carried the cups and coffeepot back to the kitchen. When he returned to the table, they were gone. He assumed they'd returned to their room.

His thoughts turned to Marshall as he headed out to start his morning chores. Nellie's husband had stuck by her as she worked through the grief. He'd put up with her abusive behavior and still seemed to love her.

Nellie had gone from the bitter woman of yesterday to the sweet woman that he remembered Sally being. Spending time with Nellie reminded him of what he'd lost by trusting Sally. She'd seemed sweet and loving, but at the same time Sally had been in love with his brother. Would he ever be able to take down the wall around his own heart? Leah's faced floated in his mind. As much as he was growing to care for her, Jake still had his doubts.

Chapter Twelve

T
wo weeks later, Leah grinned at Agnes. “I think it looks very festive around here.” She looked at the banister covered with greenery that seemed to flow down the stairs. Decorative Christmas ornaments hung about the room on boughs of green and red garland.

“What are your plans for that?” Agnes pointed to the Christmas wreath they had just finished making.

“Hang it on the kitchen door, of course.” Leah glanced up the stairs. “Would you mind listening for Molly while I do it?”

Agnes stood. “Not at all. I think I have some candles we can place in the windows. I'll go look up in the attic.” She headed upstairs.

Leah picked up the wreath and headed for the door. She hummed a Christmas carol under her breath. It was hard to believe that the holiday was only a week away. The sun shone and filled the house with light when she opened the door.

Laying the wreath against the wall beside the door, Leah decided to go in search of a hammer and nail.

The sun glinting off the white landscape created a brightness that was almost blinding. Shielding her eyes against the glare, Leah followed the packed snow path to the barn.

She pulled the door open and slipped inside. The scent of warm hay and horses greeted her. It took Leah's eyes a moment to adjust to the change in lighting.

Jake sat on a barrel just inside the door, applying oil to one of the saddles. When it was clear that Molly wasn't with her, he asked, “Is Molly all right?”

Leah turned to face him. “Molly's fine. She's napping.”

He laid the oil rag to the side. “Then what brings you out to the barn?” Jake smiled.

“Agnes and I are decorating for Christmas and I was going to hang a wreath on the kitchen door, only I don't have a nail.” She smiled back at him.

Jake walked to a small shelf and dug in a bag. He pulled out a couple of nails, then reached up and took a hammer from one of the many hooks. “These should do it.” He walked back and handed them to her.

“Thanks.”

“You're going to need a ladder, also.” Jake walked to a corner of the barn and returned a few moments later. “Ready?”

“You're going to help me?” Leah asked. He'd spent very little time with her since Nellie had left. She was both happy and nervous.

He held the barn door open. “Yep.”

Leah nodded and headed back up the snow-packed path to the house. “I'm not sure we need the step ladder.”

“Maybe not, but we'll have it just in case.” His boots crunched along behind her. “How have you been?”

The question took her by surprise. He'd seen her while reading to Molly at night and during meals. “Good.”

Jake followed her up the steps and into the house. He set the ladder against the kitchen wall. “Where did you want to put the wreath?” he asked, facing the closed door.

Leah walked up to the door. She held the nails and hammer in her left hand. Using her right hand, she reached up above her head and pointed. She looked over her shoulder at him. “Right about here. What do you think?”

He nodded. “That looks like a good place.” Jake moved up behind her. “Keep your hand where you want the nail.” He reached down and took the nails and hammer from her other hand.

She could feel the warmth of his chest behind her. Leah faced the door and inhaled. He smelled of hay and warmth. She felt his hand cover hers.

“Okay, you can move now. I think I have it.”

Leah moved off to the side. Her heart beat against her chest.

Jake placed the nail against the wood but before hammering it in he asked, “Does this look about right?”

She tried to focus on the job at hand. “It looks about right.”

Jake hammered the nail in and picked up the wreath. He slipped it onto the nail. “You were right, we didn't need the ladder.” He stepped back to admire his work.

They stood side by side, staring at the wreath. She didn't know what more to say. He'd put up the wreath, nothing more needed to be done.

“I'm sorry I haven't been around to help out with Molly,” Jake continued. “Seeing Nellie took me back a few years and I needed to think through some things.”

“Want to talk about it?” Leah didn't know why she'd asked him that, but now that the words were out she hoped he would.

He turned to face her. “Did Nellie tell you anything about our past?”

Leah realized that maybe she didn't want to hear this. Nellie hadn't said anything on the subject. Leah knew that Molly was her niece and that Molly's mother had been Nellie's twin sister, but not once had they discussed Jake. Leah shook her head.

Jake took a deep breath. “Then I should tell you. As you already know, Nellie had a twin sister, Sally.”

“Yes, she did mention that Molly's mother was her sister,” Leah said.

“Did she mention that Sally was engaged to me before she married my brother?” Hurt filled his voice.

“No.” Leah didn't say any more. She wanted to give Jake the chance to pour out what he felt he needed to say.

“She and I were to be married. On the morning of our wedding, my brother, John, and Sally got married and then came out to the ranch and told me.” He stared deeply into her eyes.

Leah saw the betrayal in his eyes. “Oh, Jake. I am so sorry.”

Jake brushed a strand of hair off her forehead. “Thank you, but that was over five years ago.”

It was her turn to nod. “True, but I can see that you are still hurting.”

He seemed to ignore her last comment. “Seeing Nellie again brought back some old memories. I just needed time to sort through my thoughts.”

“And did you?”

Jake looked deeply into her eyes. “Do you remember me telling you that our marriage would be in name only?”

All Leah could do was nod. She'd lost her means of speech as she tried to figure out where he was going with this conversation.

“Well, Sally and John's betrayal is the reason. I haven't worked through the hurt, Leah.” He paused. “I'm not sure I ever will.”

Leah didn't know how to respond. She'd known he'd never love her and now she knew why. If Sally hadn't broken his heart and his brother hadn't betrayed him, would Jake have taken a chance on loving her?

That cruel voice she'd heard in her head since childhood answered,
No, he wouldn't have
, reminding Leah that her parents had abandoned her. Her parents hadn't loved her enough to keep her. Even if he could have grown to love her, there was always the chance he'd desert her much like her parents had.

* * *

Jake saw the hurt drift across Leah's face. He hadn't meant to hurt her, but she needed to know why he couldn't allow his heart to be broken again. “I'm sorry, Leah. If you want to call off the wedding, I understand.”

She reached up and touched his face. A wobbly smile filled her lips. “I still want to marry you, Jake.” Her soft fingers warmed his cold cheek. “Since you are being honest with me, let me assure you that I am not looking for love. I simply want to be with Molly and have a place to call home.”

He knew there was more to her story. There was an old saying that the eyes were mirrors of the soul. Leah's eyes were filled with hurt. She could no more hide it than he could, apparently. They made quite the pair. Jake allowed her to see his true feelings and knew his eyes reflected his unhappiness and mistrust of love. Why didn't Leah want his love? The question filtered through his mind. Had she been hurt, too? He couldn't stop the word from leaving his lips. “Why?”

Her hand slid from his jaw. “Why, what?”

“Why aren't you looking for love?” he pressed, wanting and dreading to hear her answer.

Leah folded her arms over her chest. “I'm not lovable.” She didn't dare tell him that people who loved her in the past had abandoned her for strangers to raise. Who would want to marry someone whose parents hadn't cared enough about her to keep her with them? He'd leave her, too, and Leah didn't think she could take that kind of rejection.

How could she say that? Didn't she realize it wasn't true? Molly loved her. Agnes valued her friendship and even he cared deeply for her.

“What makes you think you are unlovable?” Jake wanted to reach out and touch her as she had him but didn't trust himself not to pull her into his arms and offer her the comfort she deserved.

She opened her mouth to answer but at that moment the sound of the stagecoach rolling up in front of the house stopped her. Leah offered him a sweet smile. “Looks like it's time to get to work. Thank you for helping me with the wreath.”

Leah entered the house, leaving Jake on the porch, confused by the emotions washing over him.

* * *

Leah walked into the kitchen aware that she'd almost told Jake about her parents leaving her on the porch steps of the orphanage and how she had always been the child who was overlooked when people wanted children. The last thing she needed was his pity. It was a good thing the arrival of the stage had interrupted them.

Agnes turned from the stove. “Heard the coach drive up. How many passengers are there this time?”

Leah sighed. She'd been so rattled by Jake that she hadn't stuck around to count. “I'll be right back.” She hurried to look out the front window.

Two men and a woman stepped down from the stage. She recognized Nellie, but Marshall wasn't with the pretty young woman. The men both wore business suits; one of them looked to be clutching a Bible against his chest. Jake walked down the steps to greet them.

She returned to the kitchen and answered Agnes, “Three, two men and Nellie.”

Agnes turned with a frown. “Molly's aunt?”

Leah nodded. She crossed to the sideboard and poured hot coffee into four mugs, one for each passenger and the driver. Placing them on a tray, her mind tried to grasp the reason Nellie had returned. The other woman had been gone almost two weeks, why return now? Had she changed her mind about taking Molly from them?

The sound of boots stomping at the front door had Leah hurrying into the main room. Agnes followed, carrying four dessert plates with sliced apple pie on them. They set each member of the stage party a place at the table. The men immediately sat down but Nellie hurried over to them.

She gave them each a hug and then turned to Leah with a big grin. “Guess what I found?” she asked with a twinkle in her eye.

Molly came down the stairs looking sleepy. “What?” she asked, before Leah could get the word out.

Jake followed the men in, carrying a small bag that Leah assumed was Nellie's. “I believe your aunt wanted Leah to ask that.” He scooped up his niece with one arm.

Molly giggled.

All eyes turned to Leah. “All right, what?” she asked.

“A preacher.”

Leah felt her mouth flop open. A preacher? Her eyes darted to Jake and then the two passengers. “Really?”

The one who held a Bible laid his hand on the book and answered, “Really.”

Nellie swept into a chair. “Right before I left, Jake asked me to see if I could find a preacher to marry the two of you. Well, I met Reverend Rice and Mr. Slade yesterday on our way to Denver and I convinced him to come back with me here. Isn't that so, Reverend?”

The preacher swallowed a lump of pie before answering. “Yes, Mrs. Crane can be most persuasive.”

Nellie giggled. “Yes, I can.”

Jake walked over to Leah. “What do you say? Shall we get married?”

Molly grinned at her and nodded her head. “Yes, let's be a family.” She clapped her hands at the idea.

Leah's throat closed up. She'd so wanted a Christmas wedding. One week before Christmas wasn't that far from Christmas Eve, the day she'd always dreamed of getting married, like the couple who'd stopped at the orphanage. Their Christmas Eve wedding had seemed perfect and they'd seemed so happy. She looked about the room. It was decorated for Christmas. Leah nodded.

Agnes laid a hand on Leah's shoulder. “This is kind of sudden, Jake. A girl needs time to prepare for her wedding.”

Jake's warm brown eyes softened as they searched her face. “I agree. Leah, do you still want a Christmas wedding?”

Had he seen her disappointment at the proposal of an earlier wedding? “Yes, but I can't ask Reverend Rice to wait a whole week.”

The preacher thumped his Bible on the table. “Of course you can, young lady! Every bride should get a say on when she will say her vows. They are for life, you know.”

“I know, but Parson John won't be coming back until spring, so even if we wait for him it won't be a Christmas wedding.” Leah offered what she hoped was a gracious smile.

He nodded and then looked to Agnes. “That pie was really something, Mrs. Frontz. Mr. Porter told me I had a treat waiting for me.” The reverend laid his fork down. “Do you serve pie often?”

Mr. Frontz and two of the express riders entered the house. Leah knew she should go pour the men some hot coffee but her legs refused to move. Unsure where the conversation was going, Leah waited for Agnes's response.

Jake set Molly down.

The little girl climbed up into her aunt's lap. Nellie immediately began spooning pie into Molly's mouth. Leah wanted to protest that pie would ruin the child's dinner but didn't trust her voice to say anything.

The other three men sat down at the table. They looked from the preacher to Agnes and back again.

Mr. Frontz nodded to Mr. Slade, who returned the gesture. Tension filled the room as if everyone expected something wonderful or strange to happen.

“Every day. But it's not always apple. Sometimes it's peach or cherry. Pretty much whatever I preserved the year before. Why do you ask?” She arched an eyebrow at him and a gleam filled her eyes.

He tilted his chair back and grinned. “Well, as long as your parson is out of town, I could stick around and provide the Christmas service. That is, if you don't mind my staying here and eating up all your pie.”