Love Starved (14 page)

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Authors: Kate Fierro

BOOK: Love Starved
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Aiden chuckled softly. “Fine. If we’re dining with Wolverine, I can’t say no. What time?”

“Six?”

“Great. See you then. And Micah?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

Aiden didn’t bring flowers, but
he didn’t come empty-handed, either. As soon as he crossed the threshold, he handed Micah a cherry pie. The pan was still warm.

“I thought you didn’t cook?” Micah said, impressed.

“I didn’t say I don’t bake, did I?” Aiden grinned. He looked much better than a week ago. Some of his color was back and he no longer seemed as if he was about to collapse at any moment. “I’m actually very good at baking. I have this favorite little bakery where I bake all my pies.” He winked and Micah laughed out loud. He’d almost believed him.

“Thank you,” he said, leading Aiden to the kitchen. “I have a new item to add to my small pool of what I know about you,” he teased. “Cute. Sensitive stomach. Law school. Likes pie.”

Aiden chuckled. “I’ll give you one more: all pie except strawberry. I’m allergic. But not deathly so.”

“I’ll enter it into my database later.” Micah winked and turned to check on the lasagna that was bubbling happily in the oven.

It was great to have someone over for dinner again, especially someone easy on the eyes who could make Micah laugh without even trying.

After the first bite of lasagna, Aiden announced that he did indeed like the vegetarian kind, too, and they both got so full that they had no room left for pie. Dinner finished and the kitchen table cleared, they moved to the living room—or tried to. Aiden stopped dead in the doorway.

“Whoa,” he said in a strangled voice. “This feels weird.”

“Too many memories?” Micah paused with a DVD in his hand.

“Yeah. I haven’t really thought about…
that
, since. But I just realized I’m acutely aware how your couch looks from the floor level, and how my blood looks on your floor. And I get kind of weak remembering how much it hurt.”

Micah frowned, concerned. Aiden looked paler than he had a moment ago, and that alone was giving Micah flashbacks. Aiden wasn’t the only one for whom that night had been a nightmare.

“Are you going to be okay?” Micah asked.

“I think so,” Aiden said, but his hands were clenched so tight that his knuckles had gone white.

“Do you want to go home?”

Aiden shook his head, his eyes fixed on the spot where the rug used to be. “No, I want to watch a movie with you. It’s just—”

“We can watch it in my bedroom.”

Micah’s mom always admonished him that the bedroom was not a place for a TV, but he agreed with that only to a point. He would gladly get rid of it if he had someone to share the space with instead. But when it was just him, himself, and his occasional bouts of insomnia, the TV was handy.

Maybe watching a movie wasn’t what Micah had thought they would be doing the first time he had Aiden—or Angel—dammit,
him
in his bedroom, but he was glad he could offer an alternative to the living room and spend the rest of the evening together. The bed was made, so all that was required was some pillow readjustment, and they could settle to watch.

Micah couldn’t focus on the movie at first; he was too aware of his surroundings and the proximity of their bodies, and kept surreptitiously glancing around with a stranger’s eyes and cursing himself for not cleaning the room properly. He hadn’t expected them to end up here tonight, so a basket of clean laundry waiting to be folded sat in a corner, and the vacuuming he’d done earlier had been perfunctory at best. Used tissues made a pile in the little wastebasket by the bed; what if Aiden thought they were there for something other than the mild cold Micah had last week?

He felt too aware of his body also—considering and reconsidering every tiny shift before he made it, and of course, thinking about it made him extra-fidgety, which only made matters worse. He was a grown man. He should be able to watch a damn movie with an attractive guy by his side without getting all flustered like a ridiculous schoolboy every time their knees touched. They’d done this before. Only, of course, they hadn’t been on a bed then, which seemed to be making all the difference.

Aiden didn’t appear to notice Micah’s discomfort; or was nice enough not to comment. He was just watching quietly, and soon his calm demeanor made Micah’s edginess subside as well. By the time he got up to put in the second movie, Micah was relaxed and amused by the comments they’d been shooting back and forth. Half an hour later they were both reclined on the bed, seeking more comfortable positions. Aiden ended up with his head on Micah’s shoulder, and after he initially tensed in surprise, Micah was amazed by how easy and natural it felt.

He was not a tactile person—at least he hadn’t been for a long time now. Living alone and focused on work as he was, Micah often went days, if not weeks, without human touch. Claudia and Daphne would hug him when they met, but an occasional handshake or brushing hands while paying for something was the extent of physical contact he had with other people. His skin had long ceased to beg for more.

Of course, he hadn’t grown up in a cold void. His family was rather affectionate, so he still remembered what loving touch felt like, what a comfort it was to be close, to be held. Being with Brian had never fulfilled this need, not really. Their relationship had been very physical in the sexual sense, but they hadn’t touched much otherwise, unless Brian wanted to show his “ownership” in public. Normally, they hadn’t even held hands—the two times they had, out in the open, were firmly set in Micah’s memory, they were so special.

That was one reason being with Angel, during their faux date and then playing boyfriends, had such an impact on him. That was affection so pure, and yet so easy and natural, that it seemed to fill some gap in him, some lack that he hadn’t realized was so immense. And those times hadn’t even been real. Now, merely existing in this little bubble of an ordinary evening with Aiden—just them, no scenarios, no fantasies, no fronts—felt like a familiar warm quilt around Micah’s body.

Finally though, the movie was over and the bliss would soon come to an end. Aiden stretched like a cat by Micah’s side, his body loose and relaxed.

“That was nice,” he said happily. “And now I feel too lazy to move.”

Micah turned to his side to face him. “We have pie.”

“Ooh, right. Well, okay, I might move. In a moment or two.”

“You don’t have to. I’m not kicking you out. Not working tomorrow.”

Aiden yawned. “Yeah, me neither. Actually, I may not work for another two weeks. I have a check-up appointment this Tuesday and will hopefully get an all-clear, but they said to take it slow for a bit, so I decided to take a break to heal properly.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” Micah said.

“I need to slow down, I think. Funny how scary experiences bring these things into focus.”

“So how long have you been in this job now?” Micah asked, emboldened by the intimacy of the moment.

But he overestimated; they might be becoming actual friends, but not to the point of sharing, at least not just yet. Aiden sat up and slid his feet to the floor in one graceful motion.

“Long enough to appreciate the little vacation,” he said with a smile, looking at Micah over his shoulder. “Now, I heard there was pie?”

“You know, I don’t think
I’ve seen you smiling this much since we started here,” Rob suddenly said on Tuesday afternoon. “It’s so cute it’s creepy, and
way
overdue.”

Micah looked up from his phone. “What is?”

“You falling for some dude, of course.”

Micah just shook his head and got back to tapping his message. He wasn’t falling for Aiden. That was not why he was smiling like a loon in the most random moments or why the world was suddenly a wonderful, bright place. But the twins wouldn’t understand; not with their crowd of friends, surrounding them at school and popping by the office, calling at all hours—not with the girlfriends at home and no empty spaces that might never be warm again. They didn’t yet know how precious a new friend could be because they’d never been cut off or alienated by a possessive lover.

Micah put away his phone—Aiden was finished with his real-time commentary on the bioengineering documentary he’d been watching—and turned back to tasks at hand. His schedule was relatively slow this week. Rob and Rebecca had taken over most of the teaching; there were no conferences or promo events for his first book for a change, and no news about a potential second one. For now, Micah could simply focus on the everyday running of the company. Maybe he should use this time to go through his clients’ contracts, check whether any of them needed renewing or changing as their networks or requirements evolved. Making a face—he hated dealing with legalese—Micah pulled up a new document. Ten minutes later, he was fully immersed in work.

“Hi. What are you doing?”

It was an early Friday afternoon and Aiden’s pitiful whine from the receiver was the last thing Micah expected. He paused with a conference schedule printout in his hand.

“Working. About to take a lunch break, actually. Why, what’s wrong?”

“Can we go somewhere tonight?”

It was the first time Aiden had initiated anything, so even if Micah hadn’t had a free evening, he would have probably found a way to change that. As it was, however, there were no obstacles, and he was happy to agree.

“Sure. Anywhere in particular?”

Aiden groaned. “Out. I need fresh air and good company. I feel like the walls are closing in on me and my muscles are turning to mush.”

Micah chuckled. “You poor thing. So what do you want to do?”

“Can we go for a run? It will be too late for a real hike, but we could run around Lake Calhoun. How about that?” Aiden sounded enthusiastic and Micah hated to burst his bubble.

“Um, sorry to disappoint you, but I hate running. It’s the one type of exercise I absolutely can’t stand. The lake is a great idea, but can we do something else? Swimming? Kayaking? I could even get home a bit early.”

“Yes. Sure. Anything. Just, let’s go out. Can we meet at your apartment? It’s just a short walk from there.”

Micah had to smile at the eagerness in Aiden’s voice. “Yeah, sure. You could come over around four, I think. I don’t have much to do here today, so let’s call it an early weekend and spend a few hours at the lake before the sun sets.”

“Great! I’ll be there. And I’m buying you dinner afterwards,” Aiden said.

“You don’t have to, you know.”

“I want to.”

Clouds had shrouded the sky
by the time they got to the lake. It didn’t look as if rain was imminent, but the temperature had dropped and the prospect of a swim didn’t seem appealing. Micah silently grieved the loss of a perfect opportunity to watch Aiden shirtless and wet, but kayaking sounded like fun, too.

They chose to rent two separate kayaks instead of a double and spent the next two hours racing each other around the lake, laughing and splashing each other whenever they got close enough. By the time they returned to the beach, Micah’s stomach muscles hurt from all the hilarity just as much as his arms ached from the effort of paddling, and both Aiden and he were ravenous and craved meat. After a quick discussion about whether burgers qualified as a stomach-safe option, and deciding that they did if they were real, quality burgers and not cheap fast food, they set off on a walk to the chosen establishment.

“I think I finally know what I need in order to start exercising with any degree of regularity,” Micah said after a while, when they’d fallen into a comfortable pace.

“What’s that?”

“Good company. That would motivate me, I believe. Otherwise, exercising is boring.”

Aiden laughed. “Exercising
is
boring. But being outdoors is fun. Running, swimming. Skiing.”

“Aiden Reeves: fan of the outdoors.” Micah grinned and nudged his elbow. “Oh, look, another thing I know about you.”

Aiden shook his head. “You’re saying it like I’m so secretive and mysterious you have to guess things about me.”

“That’s because you are!”

“Am not!” Aiden exclaimed, his smile wide as ever. “Come on, ask me anything. I’ll give you any fact you want. Unless it’s embarrassing.”

Micah was curious about a lot of things, but he immediately rejected all of the more serious questions. The light mood of the evening was lovely; he didn’t want to risk spoiling it.

“Okay, tell me about your first boyfriend,” he said. “Or girlfriend, whoever was first.”

“Girlfriend. We were both sixteen. Her name was Natalie; she was a dancer, and she had the most beautiful pair of—”

“Aiden!”

“Eyes! What did you think I was going to say?” Aiden chortled. “She had beautiful eyes, very blue, kind of like yours, and she was blonde. She was smart, too—she went on to study at Sorbonne. It was a huge deal. See? I’m not secretive at all. Anything else?”

“Hmm, favorite subject at school?”

“Oh no, going for the heavy artillery, are you?”

Micah laughed. “How is that heavy artillery? It’s the simplest question ever.”

“Maybe for you. I always loved
everything
. How am I supposed to pick? I mean, all that knowledge—it was fascinating! Biology was my favorite, I guess. Maybe. But then there was literature, and history, and oh, geography! I loved learning about places I could visit one day.”

“I bet you were one of those brainiacs who read all their school books before classes started and had perfect grades?” Micah stuck his tongue out at Aiden.

Aiden chuckled. “You’d be surprised. I mean, okay, I did read them, but my grades were always below everyone’s expectations because I was too busy finding new things to learn to bother with boring stuff like homework, or tests. And I constantly annoyed my teachers asking too many questions and pointing out when they said something stupid.”

“You didn’t.” Micah’s eyes widened.

“I did! My parents were called in to school once because a teacher complained I made her sound incompetent. That was in third grade. They got really mad and told me to just sit quietly even if a teacher says black is white. So I took a notebook and wrote it down instead, all the mistakes any of my teachers made in class. There are some real gems. I kept it up until sophomore year, I think. I still have it somewhere.” He grinned. “I was a real brat, too well read for my own good.”

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