Lovers at Heart (21 page)

As they made their way out of the club, the evening was cool and the lights from the shops shone in the open doorways.

“Treat! Hey, buddy. How’s the hottest guy around?” A man in drag, complete with high heels and thick makeup kissed Treat on each cheek.

“Marcus!” Treat’s eyes lit up at the sight of his old friend.

“Maxine tonight,” the man said with a flirtatious wink.

“You look beautiful, Maxine.” He emphasized
Maxine
. “This is…” Treat didn’t know how to label Max—friend, girlfriend?

Max stepped forward and extended a hand. “I’m Max, Treat’s weekend plaything.” She laughed.

“Uh-uh, honey. My man Treat doesn’t do weekend playthings. You must be someone special if you’re up here with him.” He leaned closer and said, “And I can see why. You are gorgeous. I absolutely love your red frames…and your name!”

“Thank you,” she said, touching her glasses.

Weekend plaything?
“Everything going well? How’s Howie?”

“Oh, sugar, he’s just as painful as ever. The man has more mood swings than a pack of PMSing women. But you know I adore him.”

Treat put his arm around Maxine and lowered his voice. “And his cancer?”

Maxine’s excitement waned for a second, and then she righted the smile on her lips again. “He’s hanging in there. He really appreciated—we really appreciated—you pulling those strings with the hospital.” Her eyes welled with tears, and she wiped them away and fanned the air. “Whew. I can’t go there right now, sugar. I have to perform tonight.”

Treat pulled her into a long embrace. “I’m here, okay? If you need me, call me anytime. You know that. Give Howie my love, please.”

“Will do, Treat.” Maxine reached for Max and hugged her, whispering in her ear, “The man is a saint.”

Treat could feel a million unasked questions from Max as they passed a man who looked as though he’d been dunked in thick gold paint standing still as a statue while a few of the remaining tourists threw money into a hat at his feet and took pictures beside him. He waited for her to ask about Howie and Marcus, and when she didn’t, he fed her unspoken curiosity.

“Howie lost his insurance a while ago, so I paid cash for his treatments and made a deal with the hospital that when he needed to be there, they’d bill me directly.” He shrugged, and then it was his turn to get an answer to the question that was burning his tongue. “You’re my weekend plaything?” he asked as they walked into Shop Therapy, a small store that specialized in retro clothing.

“I could tell that you didn’t know what to call me.” She shrugged.

She fingered through a rack of retro clothes, and Treat turned her around to face her with a serious gaze. “You do know that you are anything but a plaything to me, right?”

She did know, but just hearing it made her smile. “Who is Marcus…Maxine?”

“He’s a friend. I’ve spent so much time up here that I’ve gotten to know many of the people who live here year-round.”

“So many people would have trouble with embracing a man in drag, and you had no hesitation.”

“Would you?” he asked Max.

“No, but some guys are really weird about that stuff. I don’t know. I guess I’m wrong.”

“I’m not most guys.”

“Yeah, I know. I actually fell for you a little more when I saw you hug him,” she admitted.

“I’ll have to remember that,” he teased. They walked toward the back of the shop, and Treat said, “You know, dressing in drag isn’t who he is. It’s what he does for a living.”

“Oh. No, I didn’t know. I guess I assumed that drag was a way of life.”

“No, at least not for him. He’s a fantastic performer. If you’d like, I’ll take you to a show sometime.” They picked through a rack of T-shirts.

She slipped into the space between the clothing rack and his body. “I would really like that. Life is too short not to let people love whomever they want to love. Love is beautiful, and it should be praised, not picked apart.” She touched his stomach and pressed her hips into his.

“See, the more I learn about you, the more I love you.”
Love
slipped so easily from his lips, and he liked the way it felt. He searched her eyes for a reaction, waiting for her to pull away. When she didn’t, he lowered his lips to hers, intending a sweet, loving kiss, but once he tasted her, he didn’t want to pull away. The way Max was pressing her body into his in all the right places made him want to lay her down right there on the floor of the store. He made himself pull away, and for a moment he just watched her lick her lips, and he knew if he didn’t move away from her hips and breasts, which were teasing every nerve in his body, he’d be walking around with a hard-on all day. He ran his hand through his hair and took a step back. Max laced her fingers into his and flashed a crooked smile.

“Wanna go upstairs?” he asked.

“What’s upstairs?”

He looked around, then whispered, “Adult toys.” He watched Max’s smile change to a worried frown, and she shrank away from him. He quickly said, “We don’t have to.”

“Um…”

Treat watched her eyes dart around the store, like she was looking for an escape. “Come on.” He took her hand and walked straight out of the store, down the street, and through an alley.

“Where are we going?” Max hurried to keep up.

A minute later they were staring at a sandy beach and a long pier. Treat walked off the edge of the street onto the sand and held his hand up for Max as she jumped down to the beach.

“Treat? Where are you taking me?”

“Right here.” He dragged her under the pier. Without the lights and noise from the shops, it was dark and quiet. Only the swishing of the water against the shore cut through the night. He brushed an area of sand. “Sit,” he said.

She sank to the sand. He sat next to her and took her hand in his.

“Why are we here?” Max asked. “Are we making out under the boardwalk?” Her eyes weren’t dancing with the thought, and the unease in her voice pulled at Treat’s heart.

“It’s safe and dark, and I figured that since we can’t see each other very well, when we’re here, you can tell me anything at all, and I promise I won’t say anything about it outside of this safe, dark place. Ever.”

She laid her head on his shoulder. “You’re too much.”

“I saw your face in there, Max. You looked appalled and frightened.” He pulled her close. Whatever he saw, he needed to understand. He didn’t need sex toys, and he hadn’t been intent on buying any, but that didn’t mean that he wouldn’t have if she were into that sort of thing. He’d do damn near anything if it would please Max. But he wanted to understand what triggered her reaction so that he could be sure he’d tread carefully around it in the future.

“I don’t have a lot of experience with men, Treat.”

Besides the relief of the statement, he knew there was a
but
coming.

She fiddled with the pocket of her hoodie. “Remember the guy I told you about?”

“Yes.”
The one I’d like to beat the shit out of?

“Are you sure you want to hear this? I mean, it’s gonna piss you off even more.”

“Look at me, Max.” He took her face in his hands and drew her close, until he was sure he had her full attention. “I want to understand whatever it was that flashed through your mind in there. You don’t have to tell me, but it might help me to understand how to make you feel safe and secure in our relationship.”

She took a deep breath. “It’s not easy to say...”

“It might not be, but most things that are meaningful are not easy.” Treat also took a deep breath, preparing himself for her confession. Putting together the idea of adult toys and the fear in her eyes, he drew all sorts of maddening conclusions, and he promised himself not to overreact. He clenched his jaw as she began to explain.

“While we were together, he asked me to try…one of
those
.” She blushed and looked away.

“It’s okay. I’m not going to judge you, Max,” he assured her.

She swallowed hard, then continued. “I was young, and I had the guy everyone wanted, so I thought…” She shrugged. “It can’t be that bad. Okay.”

He didn’t want to hear what that asshole had done to her, but he wanted Max to heal from whatever hurt she was carrying around her neck like a noose. Just talking with his father had helped him so much that he was sure it would help Max to unload her worries, too.

She closed her eyes and spoke in a flat, even tone. “It was the night he grabbed me. We were in the bedroom, and he had undressed me, but he still had his pants on.”

He felt her body shaking in his arms. “I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. You don’t have to continue if you don’t want to, Max.”

“I want to.” She opened her eyes and looked into his. “He used…
it
, and at first it wasn’t bad, you know? He was just kind of being gentle.” She shrugged. “And then I don’t know what happened. His eyes changed, almost like a different person took over inside of him, you know?”

A tear slipped down her cheek.

Treat wiped it away with his thumb, trying to keep his own twitching nerves in check, for the pain and anguish he saw in her eyes and what she was likely to have endured.

Max continued with an icy tone. “He was suddenly shoving it into me so hard and saying horrible, nasty things. Cursing at me and calling me names, and somehow…somehow I was able to crawl away from him and grab my clothes. I ran for the door, and that’s when he grabbed my arm.” She shook her head. Tears were streaming endlessly down her cheeks.

Treat pulled her against his chest. “Shh.” He rubbed her back, stifling his mounting rage and his desire to get every detail on the asshole and rip him to shreds.

She pushed away angrily. “There’s more. When I looked down, there was blood dripping down my legs. Bright red blood. I don’t remember much after that except that my arm hurt like hell and he drank a lot of beer and then passed out in the bedroom. That’s when my mom called. That’s when I left.”

“Max, he had no right to touch you like that.” Treat’s entire body pulsed with rage, but more important than the desire to hammer the hell out of that asshole was the desire—the visceral need—to help Max heal. “Baby, come here.” He held her trembling body against him while she cried. “Let it out. Let all of it out until there’s nothing left to tear you up. None of that was your fault, sweetness, and I’ll never let anything like that happen to you again.”

They remained in that position for a long time, until the footsteps on the pier above them silenced and the moon shone bright on the rippling water.

On the drive back to the bungalow, Max stared out the window, and Treat couldn’t stop thinking about the image of Max, scared and bleeding.
What kind of animal would do that to her?
He remembered the way Max had touched him, the way she had craved him in her apartment—and he now understood how much courage it must have taken for her to open up to him in such an intimate way and take him with her mouth—and he also understood how the look he’d given her in Nassau would translate in her mind to a precursor for a hidden aggression. That understanding made him wonder if she’d done things with him out of some sort of fear.

“Sweetness, when you were with me, when you took me beside your bed, why did you do it? You don’t have to do those things with me, Max. Ever. I can live our entire lives with nothing but kissing you and touching you. I never want you to feel like you owe me something or you have to live up to what you think other women might do or what other men might want. I’m not them, and you’re sure as hell not like any other woman.”

She turned to face him, and her eyes told her answer before he heard the words. “I wanted to. I’ve only been with two other men, Treat. The man I told you about and one other during my senior year of high school. I thought I loved him and that we’d be together forever, but you know how that goes. What do you know at eighteen? We went to separate colleges, and I got the inevitable Dear Jane letter a month later.”

“I wish I’d known you then. I’d have loved you forever,” he said, and he meant it so much that his heart ached.

“No, you wouldn’t have. I told you, I was weak. I wasn’t the same person. It’s better that we’re together now. Besides, I don’t think I could have taken all those girls vying for your attention all the time. I was never that strong.”

“There weren’t actually that many,” he said as he parked the car.

“Pfft. Everywhere we go, you are the center of attention, and that’s okay. That’s good. It makes me proud to be on your arm. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy. I’m not that strong, Treat. I have insecurities, and your looks stir the pot with every one of them. It’s something I’ll have to learn to overcome.”

He came around the car and opened her door for her, offering his hand when she stepped out.

“I can promise you that I will never act on any advances by any women, and I sure as hell wouldn’t ever think of hurting you in any way—and certainly not in a sexual way. Can’t you tell how much I adore you, Max? I didn’t think I’d ever feel as strongly about anyone as I do about my own family, and my feelings for you put them all to shame.”

THEY SAT ON the couch in front of the fire, Max’s legs across Treat’s lap. He massaged her feet, pressing his thumbs deeply into the arch of her foot.

“You can’t even begin to understand how good that feels.” Max closed her eyes, enjoying his touch.

“Oh, I think I can.”

She opened one eye. “Yeah?”

“It’s touch, and touch is good,” he said in a husky voice.

Why does your voice turn my entire body on?
She pulled her feet from his lap and sat up, tucking them beneath her body.

“Let me do you,” she said.

“Why, Max, what kind of man do you think I am?”

She playfully smacked his chest. “Not like that. Let me rub you and make you feel good.”

He wiggled his eyebrows. “You naughty girl, you.” He went to a closet that Max hadn’t noticed earlier and withdrew a comforter, then spread it out on the floor in front of the fireplace. When he pulled his shirt over his head with one hand, all of her breath rushed from her lungs at the perfectly sculpted physique on the man she loved with every ounce of her soul.