Loving the Bear (3 page)

Chapter Four

Lilly peeked out of the café window and into the parking lot. She’d called Christopher as soon as her shift was done. He’d told her he’d be right there and the good news was her van was running again. He hadn’t mentioned what the problem had been or the cost, but she had her checkbook ready. Well, that was hoping she had enough to cover it. If she didn’t it would have to go on her credit card which she hated using knowing all she could afford was the minimum monthly payment.

She recognized his car from when he’d dropped her off.
She got ready to head out to the parking lot.

“Night
, Rose,” Lilly called to the owner.

“Have a great evening
, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Lilly opened the door and ran toward Christopher’s car. She smiled
when she saw he’d brought Barney along for the ride, and he’d already jumped into the passenger seat. If only she had a place that would let her have a pet, she’d love to give him a home. Someone to come home to when she opened the door every day. Someone to talk to, even if he wasn’t human.

“Let Lilly get in the car,” Christopher told the dog when she opened the door.

“He’s okay; I can sit with him on my lap. Well, that’s if it’s allowed.”

She picked up the do
g, sat, and placed him on her legs. He immediately licked her face and she stroked him. He was so warm and soft. It felt good to have something comforting near her. A tear slid down her face. She missed Katlin so much. If only they could be together again.

She wiped the tear away hoping that Christopher didn’t see her.

“So you going to let Barney sleep in your bed?” asked Lilly. He barked when she said his name.

“Don’t give
him any ideas.”

“I’m sure he’d like some company now
that his owner’s gone.”

“He
pulled me toward Mrs. Nelson’s door, well what’s left of Mrs. Nelson’s door, when we went along the hallway.”

“The poor little guy.”
She patted him and he licked her face again. She sort of knew how he felt when someone you loved so much wasn’t around.

“Don’t worry I’ll spoil him for a few days and then it’s up to Mrs. Nelson’s son to take over.”

They pulled into the parking lot and Lilly spotted her van. They both got out.

“So what was wrong with it?” she asked.

“Dead battery. My friend Sam knew straight away. Wolv…” He barely stopped himself from saying wolves, “…he has good intuitions about that sort of thing.”

“Please thank him,” said Lilly as they got out of the car. “And let me know how much I owe him for his time and the battery.”

She dug into her purse for her checkbook and pen.

Christopher waved his hand at her. “His service was free and seeing how you lost a customer today
, the battery’s on me.”

“No, that’s not your fault, it’s not anyone’s fault. I insist I pay you, at least for the battery.”

He shook his head. “Nope, it’s a gift from me.”

“I don’t want to sound ungrateful but
I’d prefer you not give me a gift, okay?”

“All right, but
have dinner with me in payment for it.”

What was it with the men
? They didn’t think she could look after herself? They did something nice for her and then expected some type of payment like a date and she knew where that would lead. She thought Christopher was different and it made her heart sink knowing she’d been living in a fantasy land all afternoon. Nothing in her life had changed.

“I don’t go out with men in exchange for them paying
for things for me.”

“Hey, that’s not what I meant
, so please don’t think that’s what I was implying.”

“Just give me the keys to my van,
tell me how much the battery cost, and I’ll be on my way.”

A vein suddenly pulsed in the side
of his forehead. Shit, that’s the sort of thing she’d seen happen to Matt before he raised his hand to her. She took two steps back.

He handed
her the key. “It was $89.99.”

Luckily sh
e remembered his last name was Renner but as for Christopher, was that a C or K?

“It’s Christopher with a C, right?”

“Yep, that’s me.”

She could tell by his tone that she’d pissed him off
. But what did he expect?

She wrote out the check and handed it to him, trying her best n
ot to make eye contact with him now. “Good luck with Barney and once again thank you.”

She walked by him
to get into the van, but he reached out and grabbed her arm. She froze on the spot, feeling familiar pain shoot through her body.

“Please take your hand off me. I don’t like to be touched.”

He pulled it away like he’d come in contact with a hot stove top.

“Sorry,” he said.

She rushed toward the van.

“Lilly, look I’m sorry if I offended you
, and as for touching you. Everyone needs to be touched, and if you don’t it’s because you’ve not be touched in the right way.”

She
tried not to listen because it was bullshit, right? She hurried into the van, slammed the door shut, crying as she started the ignition. She put her foot on the accelerator and exited the parking lot of the condo building as fast as she could. Her tears filled her eyes making it impossible for her to drive even another foot.

Damn
, she’d be a road hazard. She pulled over and turned off the ignition and put her head down upon the steering wheel. He’d probably meant no harm. He seemed so sweet and nice and her stupidity had probably insulted him.

Damn
that bastard of an ex-husband for ruining her life and turning her into a freak.

Chapter Five

Christopher slumped down on the couch. When Lilly had gotten uptight about him paying for the battery and suggested he had ulterior motives, his first reaction had been anger. He was only trying to be nice, but he guessed he didn’t know her well enough, and now that he’d had a chance to calm down, he could see how his action could have been easily misconstrued.

He probably should have phrased it a little differentl
y, but that was typical of him; say it first, then think about the consequences.

When he’d
reached out to touch her to assure her he hadn’t meant anything bad, he’d actually made things a whole lot worse. And touching her had sent her into sheer panic.

There was fear
too. His bear had smelled it, raw fear. The fear for your life kind.

It
wasn’t neccessarily him she was scared of, that he knew. He’d hazard a guess she was just scared, period. Had she been attacked at some point? Raped maybe? He shook his head. If that was the case he’d like to get his hands on whoever had done either of those things to her.

Barney cho
se that moment to jump up on the couch next to him. He dropped a ball on Christopher’s lap.

“Guess you want to go for a run and play. I could do with a good run too. Would you be scared if I ran as my bear self?”

The Pomeranian tilted his head to the right side.

“You ever had a girlfriend, Barney?”

He barked.

“Is that
a yes or a no?”

He barked again.

“Why are women, whether they’re human or shifter, so complex?”

Barney slumped down beside him and rested his head on his paws.

“She’s so pretty. She’s nice too, right Barney?”

The dog glanced up at him without moving his head.

“I’m not giving up. That’s not what Christopher Renner’s about. I’m going to find a way to break through whatever’s scaring her. I’m going to heal her and make her my mate.”

Barney jumped up and barked.

“Glad I have you on my side because I need all the help I can get.”

****

The sound of Katlin’s voice lifted her spirits. It had been one of those sorts of days, partially because of her own stupid hang-ups, but hearing her daughter’s voice on the other end of the line made it seem like the world was nothing but all perfect.

“Tell
Mommy what you did today,” Lilly’s mother spoke in the background.

“I counted with
Grandma,” said Katlin.

“You d
id? Well, that’s very clever of you,” said Lilly.

“I ate
mac and cheese.”

“Oh, my favorite,” said Lilly. “Grandma makes the best kind.”

A tear ran down her cheek. She was doing all this for her. Getting settled somewhere new, saving money so one day Katlin could join her in Montana, and they’d live happily ever after.

She knew deep in her heart they would
, but getting to that part was the tough bit. There were days when she didn’t think they’d ever arrive there.

Like today.

Lilly swiped away a tear and tried to get her composure back before she spoke to her daughter again. Even at her tender age, Katlin knew when something wasn’t right.

“How about Mommy reading you a bedtime story?” asked Lilly.

“Bears, Mommy, bear story.”

“Okay, bears it is.” Lilly reached for the book with the brown bear on it. She kept a supply of Katlin’s books
with her so she could read to her over the phone. Ever since she’d been a baby, Katlin had loved a bedtime story. Back when things had been really bad with Matt, Lilly would escape into the make-believe world she was reading about. The world where men were heroes, they didn’t hurt women, men and women fell in love, stayed that way, and lived happily ever after.

An image of Christopher sprang into her mind. She wasn’t sure why, but when she thought back to those fairy tales and happy endings, she’d thought of him. She only hoped she hadn’t offended him too much because now she realized that he hadn’t offered her the fre
e battery with the intent of her owing him something somewhere down the line. She really wanted to phone and apologize, but she was too embarrassed to talk to him.

“Bears,” said Katlin and it jerked Lilly out of her train of thought.

“Are you all snuggled up in bed ready to hear the story?” asked Lilly.

“Eddie’s here too.”

Lilly smiled. She could picture Katlin and the bear under the covers. She opened the book to the first page.

“Deep in the forest lived a dog named Ryan. He lived in a house all by himself. Tonight it was raining. He heard something moving outside…”

“It’s the bear, it’s the bear,” said Katlin.

“You have to wait and see if it is,” said Lilly continuing with the story. About five minutes later Lilly’s mom came on the line and whispered
to her.

“She’s fallen asleep and I’m creeping outside the room
to talk to you so I don’t disturb her.”

“Is she doing okay?”

“She’s fine and the bedtime stories were a wonderful idea, honey.”

“I
enjoy them as much as she does,” said Lilly.

“So how was yo
ur day and how did you get on with cleaning your first customer’s home?”

“It’s a long story
, but she died.”

“Died?”

“Yes, they think she had a heart attack while she sitting in the chair reading. All that happened before I got there I should add.”

“Oh honey, that’s awful.”

“Then the van’s battery died.”

And a charming and good looking young man helped me and I was downright rude to him.

No, her mom didn’t need to hear that because she’d lectured her about opening up her heart to someone again. Trusting them enough to let them into her life.

“I got a new one and it’s back running. At least I have the café job to keep me going until I find a
nother customer.”

“I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you
, and don’t you go worrying about Katlin. She can live here with us for as long as it takes you to get settled in there.”

What would she have done without her mother
and stepfather? She hated to think what people did who didn’t have this sort of support. In the back of her mind, she’d given some thought to opening a sanctuary for battered women and their children. Somewhere they could run when things turned ugly and they had nowhere else to turn. One day when she was back on her feet she’d do it.

“I can send some m
oney for her food and clothing. I know she’s growing fast and probably needs something new every week.”

“You will not. You keep every penny and put it toward making a new home for the two of you.”

“How am I ever going to repay you?”

“By beginning a new life, and being happy again, that’s how. Oh and inviting m
e and Bob for a vacation in Montana. I’ve always wanted to see Glacier National Park.”

“Then let’s plan on the four of us going there sometime soon.”

“I’m holding you to that.”

“I’ll say goodnight
, and kiss Katlin for me.”

“I will, night
y, night honey.”

Lilly put the phone down. A new
life; being happy again. After what she’d done and how she’d behaved toward Christopher, she doubted that was ever in the cards for her because Matt had turned her into an idiot.