Luca (I Love the Way You Lie #1) (14 page)

Lost in sated silence, I watched the tree’s shadows dance on the ceiling. A stretch of contentment wound through my body. I ached deliciously in places that had me blushing all over again. I basked sweetly in it. Forever and irrevocably changed by him. A pang of sadness stabbed straight through my heart.
Could I ever feel this way with anyone but him?
I wondered. Why this was even floating around, I attributed to insecurity. Let’s face it…I had a few issues. However, the answer quick to leave my tongue was—no.

Luca returned after discarding the condom with a warm cloth to wash me. One glance at his lean, muscled body had my insides doing funny things. His sexed, mused hair hung perfectly over his eyes. A knowing smile touched his lips. Never had I ever felt so…adored. He was far from the lurking stalker I once thought he was.

There was no denying how he put me back together. I was grateful for him and never wanted to know a life without him in it. Yes, I was a naïve, stupid girl. He would never hurt me—ever. That…I was positive about.

Was this love or infatuation? Certainly, I’ve experienced infatuation before. That did
not
end well for me. I let my guard down and trusted Luca. This
was
different. That…I was
sure
of.

“I’m sending out my college application today,” I blurted out while dressing. We never once discussed anything about our future. I was interested in what his plans were.

“What are you going for?” He bent, kissing my forehead.

I was surprised he was interested. He didn’t seem like the type of guy that gave much weight to higher education.
There you go, profiling again,
I thought.

“Social work.” I shrugged, feeling embarrassed. It was lame. I had knocked my therapist at every turn. Now, I wanted to follow in her footsteps. “Don’t think I’m lame.”

He lit a cigarette, inhaling deeply. I never thought I could be so fascinated by cigarette smoke. However, I was in awe as I watched the smoke rings come out of his mouth. The way his perfect lips made an O. The way his hair hung in his eyes. They way I was dying to run my fingers through it. The way his hold on the cigarette was so…confident.
You need fucking help
, I thought. I was in a toxic wasteland of all things Luca. I shook my head in spite of myself.

“Hey, you haven’t heard a word I’ve said,” he said.

“What?” I blinked.
No, I haven’t heard a word, Luca. I’m too wrapped up in your breathing
. Gah. “Sorry, I was thinking about something else. Got a lot on my mind,” I lied. What an idiot.

“No worries. I get it. It’s a good career choice for you. Just my opinion,” he said in somewhat of a dismissive tone. He flicked the cigarette out of the window and then closed it with a bang.

Instead of reading into it for the rest of the day, I decided to push him on his plans. “What are your plans? After this place…”

His body went rigid. “Family business.”

“What kind of business?” I asked. I had no idea.
You never asked, jackass
, I thought. Which was true; I was far too obsessed with his lips.

“It’s business. Boring shit. Nothing you’d be interested in,” he said, walking into the bathroom. He was blowing me off. There must be a reason he wouldn’t elaborate.

Not wanting to taint this perfect morning, I decided to let it go for now. It was all about timing with Luca. He couldn’t be pushed, unless he was the one pushing.

“Okay, I’ll see you later?” I asked, waiting for his answer.

”Definitely, babe.” He nodded, finally answering, and then left me with one of his drugging kisses. Sigh. I headed out the door; it was locked.
So it was locked after all
, I thought.

I smiled and turned back to face him. “Truth?”

His smile widened. “Of course.”

“Dinner is my favorite meal.” I winked, closing the door behind me, his laughter meeting me on the other side. A tiny bit of relief touched my heart. However, my departure was still ambivalent. It felt like he was hiding something. Confusion and insecurity: two emotions that often took me to the mat.

Today, I’d embrace therapy. Fuck, I needed it. I knew full well that my earlier activities weren’t meant to be shared. I’m pretty sure we broke some rules if not a law or two. I felt like I starred in my own porn movie. Luca was more than comfortable in his sexual prowess. Damn, his moves would rival a porn star. So this would be just one more secret I’d keep. Instead of fixating on Luca, I decided to concentrate on my future. I would be college-bound soon. That was something I was both excited and proud of. I just needed to stay strong. It will all work out.
You have no control. You have no control,
I reminded myself.

~~~

Just Jane was a real hero for me today. I danced around Luca. However, she saw past the thin veil that shrouded me. This is what a good therapist did, I decided. With my future in my grasp, I left her office. Ollie was her next appointment.

“Hey, you.” He stepped forward, crowding me. His smile was predatory as his barbell met his bottom lip on full display. Oh god. I squeezed my eyes shut. And his scent… He would have any woman on her knees.

I tried to feign indifference. “Hey, Ollie.”

He smirked. “I’ve got this bullshit.” He gestured to Just Jane. “But I have a new song I’ve been working on. I’d love to get your thoughts.” He shrugged indifferently.

I’d love to hear it. Fuck, who wouldn’t? He was famous, and fucking hot. Who wouldn’t want an opportunity to listen to him play? I hoped I could drag Keri with me. She’d eat this shit up.

“Sounds like a plan,” I said, smiling up at him.

He reached, over tucking my hair over my ear. “So it is.” His voice was deep and low. Then he walked into Just Jane’s office. I was left open-mouthed, deciphering the meaning behind his words.

Gah! I reminded myself that I was with Luca. I wasn’t that girl. However, another time and place—fuck.
A perfect fucking specimen of a Viking
, I thought. I left, retreating to my room, my heart tender and afraid. Over-stimulated and beyond tired, I needed a nap.

My phone vibrated; it was my mother so I sent it to voice mail. It was either about my home life or family, and I couldn’t care less about either one. Although, I was pretty positive it was about Scully. I shook my head in defeat. I was an awful person; I hadn’t even given him a thought. What kind of person does that make me? I chewed on that for a while.
It makes me the girl who decided to take care of herself for once
.
Normal
. I recently wrapped my head around what happened to me.
You need to do you,
I thought. That’s what I’ve been told. Shrouded in silence, I fell into a deep sleep.

The moon watches me along the shore of the pond. My reflection in the rippled water was one of confidence, no longer drowning in my own riptide. I nourished in the moon’s light. Once, I had begged for the sun to smile at me. I now had both. The moon nourished my dark side while the sun provided warmth to my light. Reborn. I was no longer suffocating. Alive and no longer a stranger to myself. No longer the emo, depressed girl. The stars have found me aligning me with you…

I was reliving my highlight reel of this morning. Sweet, fucking sexy Allison. She was perfect—and mine. I lit another cigarette, needing something to do with my mouth. I bit back a groan thinking of that sweet mouth of hers and her breathy sounds as my tongue gave her pleasure. I desperately wanted to hear those sounds again—soon. The smell of her heat when she opened for me…it nearly killed me. Her candy-tasting pussy and those pebbled rosy nipples pressed against me did me in.
Fuck
.

I turned to the bathroom mirror to check out the claw marks left on my shoulders. However, the way she screamed my name, proved she owned me as much as I owned her. That fact had me turned inside out. Fuck, my cock was still half-hard. She’s insatiable and I was ready for more. I was handed a little slice of prefect pie. There was no turning back. Not that that was even an option.
That’s for fuck sure
, I thought. I knew that the first time I saw her. She
was
my speedball. My…fire.

The wall clock said 12:30. Thankfully, my pops needed to push back our meeting this morning. He’d be here in thirty minutes. I continued to dress after unlocking the door for Archer.

Archer’s laugh rumbled before he stepped through the door. “Dude.” He continued to laugh.

“What’s so fucking funny?” I wasn’t really in the mood.

“Two questions: who’s the hissing chick with the snake tongue? And is she single?”

I held in my laugh. “You thought she was hitting on you?”

“What was I supposed to think? She was doing this rapid tongue thing. Thought it was an offer.” He shrugged.

I nearly fell over at the hilarity of it. “She’s fucking crazy, thinks she’s possessed,” I stated clearly.

His face was now a shade paler. “Seriously?”

I stood motionless, staring.

“You better be fucking with me.” His voice was pleading.

I shook my head. “Nope. She claims to speak in tongues. I never saw it, but I know a few that have. And they were freaked. Maybe that’s why the priest is always with her.” I tapped my chin thoughtfully. I knew Archer was freaked by anything supernatural.
Pussy
. “I could hook you up…” I prodded gently.

He arched an eyebrow. “No fucking thank you, bro.” He shook his head. Now, I was laughing. He’d be thinking of this for the rest of the day. I missed this with him. Fucking with him and the comradery we shared. Soon, I’d be adding the title of associates to that list.

Speaking of which… “My pop will be here in twenty. Let me do the talking—unless he asks you something,” I said before walking over to enjoy another smoke.

~~~

Paulie—Dad’s right arm—and my father were escorted in by security. It was a respect thing. Security was the last thing my pop needed with Paulie. It took everything in me not to roll my eyes and say
fuck this shit
at the amount of ass kissing that ensued. Gino was a dapper don. Today, he was dressed in a dark navy suit with hat.
Who the fuck where’s a hat?
I thought. He looked around my room in disgust and then removed his overcoat, laying it across my bed. It was hard for
any
person not to be enamored with him. His presence begged attention. While his voice was deadly soft, he never repeated himself so you had no choice but to listen.

I walked over, kissing both cheeks. “Hey, Pop,” I greeted him. Then turned to Paulie and did the same. Archer stepped up, shaking both their hands without uttering a word. Good.

“Let’s sit by the window. Fresh air, no?” Gino said. Which meant…we were sitting by the window. Double-talking-fucking-guinea. I mumbled as we sat in a small circle of chairs. Paulie stood behind him. I’m sure my pop was going to be complaining about no espresso any minute.

With a loud exhale, he started, “Life is a series of decisions. Some of your firsts landed you here.” He gestured with both hands in front of him. “Today, you start making new decisions. All these mistakes you’ve made were experience and lessons.” He shrugged. “Good or bad, you’re finally going to do what you’re meant to do. No?” His voice was as clear as his insinuation. I nodded. “I’ve put men in the ground, lost money playing cards, lied, robbed, cheated, fucked women…you name it,” he said and then held up his index finger to exaggerate his point. “At the end of the day, we’re all made up of the same stuff. But it’s what’s in here.” He held his hand over his heart. “La famiglia”