Magic of the Wood House (The Elemental Phases Book 6) (6 page)

“Nobody
could prove that at the trial!”  He shot back.  “And ninety-one sure isn’t
thirty-goddamn-five.  All I’m saying is that Teja should give up on Sullivan
and save us all the trouble.  You think Job will let her molest that boy?”

“You
think Job can tell me what I can do with my own Match?”  Teja retorted.

Sullivan
was compiling his own “Weirdo-to-English” dictionary and he was fairly certain
“Match” was like their word for boyfriend/girlfriend.  He looked over at Teja
in surprise.  “Hang on, what’s this really about?”

She
rubbed at her forehead.  “It’s about what I’m supposed to do with you.”

“You’re
supposed to take me home.”

“Not
until you give us the box.”  Djinn insisted.

Pele
nodded.  “Just give us the box, before you get hurt, boy.”

Sullivan
ground his teeth together.  “What
box?!
  You people keep saying that,
but I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Djinn
sighed like Sullivan was being deliberately obtuse.  “Tej?  You see?  You
see
why you should throw him back and keep looking for a better
Match? 
A bunch of Banished Phases turned up in the Cloudland.  Some --like-- awesomely
badass ones, who aren’t children, or Wood Phases, or humans.  Why don’t you try
Phazing with one of
them?
”

Teja
slanted her cousin another patented scowl and headed over to stand against the
wall, again.

Sullivan’s
eyes narrowed at Djinn.  Piecing that together, it seemed like that bastard was
encouraging Teja to have sex with some other guy.  Oh
hell
no.  His
instincts snarled at the very idea.

“I
think you should shut up, now.”  Sullivan said quietly, spacing the words for
emphasis.

Djinn
glanced at him appraisingly

Sullivan
held his gaze.  “Don’t push me.”  He warned.  “I’ve been
exuding
holiday
cheer so far, but this isn’t the day to get on my bad side.”

Djinn’s
mouth curved.  “Well shit.  There
is
some of Parson in you, isn’t
there?”

“The
box is one of the Tablets of Fate.”  Alder interjected, trying to defuse the
tension.  He pulled his attention away from making a perfectly symmetrical “C”
on the plastic screen of his Etch-A-Sketch.  “You shouldn’t be playing around
with those Tablets, Sully.  Let the grown-ups handle them.”

Sullivan
somehow resisted the urge to break the stupid toy over his head.

“The
rumor going around is that you have the Happiness Tablet.”  Alder continued. 
“We need you to give it to us, before more assassins come after you.  For real,
there are a lot of bad guys who will do bad things to get that box.”

Sullivan
was still drawing a blank, but the others were all watching him expectantly. 
“I’m not happy.”  He said without even thinking about it.  “If I had a box that
could
make
me happy, it’s busted.”

Teja
glanced his way, her eyebrows tugging together.

“No.” 
Alder shook his head.  “You’re not getting it.  The Happiness Tablet doesn’t
make
you happy.  It controls
Happiness
.  I guess it could let you steal
someone’s Happiness or…”  He trailed off with a considering frown.  “Well,
maybe you could
give
someone Happiness with it.  I don’t know.  Dad?” 
He glanced over at Djinn.  “How do you think it works?”

Djinn
shrugged.  “Who cares?  I’m already plenty happy.  I just want the damn thing
so nobody else gets it.”

“Supernatural
peer pressure.”  Sullivan translated.  “Right.  Well, I don’t have your
mystical do-hickey.  So, if that’s all…”

“You
must have it.”  Alder interrupted.  “It’s about the size of a Rubik’s Cube,
made of mirrors with white writing on all the sides.”

Djinn
nodded.  “Your grandfather hid it and everyone thinks that he gave it you. 
Parson had to have --like-- stressed that it was important or something. 
Think
. 
Where did you put it?”

Sullivan
ran a hand through his hair.  “My grandfather died when I was a kid.  The only
things he gave me were Hot Wheels cars.  After he died, I got a storage
container filled with Christmas lights and an insurance check.  If he left some
incredibly important, shiny box with me, I don’t remember it.  And that’s the
truth.”

“Told
you.”  Teja chimed in.

Pele
studied Sullivan for a long moment and then swore.  “Djinn?  I don’t think the
human has the Tablet.  He’s not bright enough to lie that convincingly.”

Sullivan
and Teja both turned to scowl at her.

“Oh
man…”  Djinn pinned Sullivan with an aggrieved look.  “All this and you don’t
even
have
the box?!”  He sounded like Sullivan had intentionally misled
them.  “Bad human!  Bad!”

“I
told you from the beginning that I didn’t have it.”  Sullivan snapped.  “And
stop talking to me like I’m a schnauzer.”

“He
gets dogs and human mixed up.”  Alder explained.  “It’s nothing personal.”

“They
fucking look alike!”

Alder
ignored Djinn’s indignant assertion.  “Anyhow, whoever started the rumor about
you having the box was really convincing, Sully.  Bad folks are gonna keep coming
for it.  Who would put this motion?  You got enemies you’ve been hiding from
us?”

“No
one cares enough about me to be my enemy.”

“I’ll
be your enemy.”  Djinn volunteered.

Teja’s
eyes flicked over to him.  “Watch it, D.”

He
held up his hands in innocence.  “I’m just trying to show that I
care
.”

“What about
Vandal?”  Pele asked Sullivan.  “He’s your enemy.”

“Vandals?” 
It was hard to keep track of the various conversations.  They all talked right
over the others.  “I’ve arrested some vandals for graffiti, but I don’t think
they’re my
enemies
so much as they’re just dickhead teens who drank too
much PBR and…”

“No.”  Alder
interrupted.  “Not human vandals.  Vandal, of the Light House.”

Sullivan
stared at him blankly.

“He’s a
black-eyed fugitive in a white robe.”  Pele prompted.  “Until a few weeks ago,
we all thought he was dead.  But, then he showed up and started shooting folks
with that gun he gave you.  It’s from the future.”

“The
future.”  Sullivan’s eyes just couldn’t roll hard enough.

“Yes!” 
Djinn’s head bobbed up and down in vehement agreement.  “Guns from this time
don’t hurt Elementals, genius.  So someone brought back a
future
weapon
and gave it to Vandal, who gave it to
you
.”

Sullivan
decided to respond to the least stupid part of that statement.  “No one ‘gave’
me the gun, alright?  I found it.”  He paused.  “I think.”

Teja
frowned.  “You seriously don’t remember where you got it?”

“No.  The
night you came to my house,” he shot her a pointed look, both of them
remembering the kiss they’d shared, “I went back to the station to release
Alder from lock-up.  Everything after that is a blank.  I woke up the next
morning with frostbitten fingers and the gun in my waistband.”

Her jaw
ticked.  “Frostbite?”

“The fucking
Cold House!”  Djinn shouted triumphantly.  “
They
did this!  They went
after our human because they hate us!  I
knew
it was them!”

Sullivan
frowned.  “Wait, who hates you?  Well, obviously
many
people must, but…”

Pele glanced
over at him.  “Cold Phases don’t like Fire Phases.”  She said like a
kindergarten teacher explaining to the class why they shouldn’t talk to
strangers at the mall.

“They’re
all
after us.”  Djinn agreed with paranoid enthusiasm.  “They tried to steal
Teja, you know.”  He nodded.  “When her parents died, they tried to make her
leave us and go with them.  But, they don’t love her.  They just want her,
because she’s powerful.”  He arched a brow.  “Like
one-of-the-most-powerful-Phases-alive powerful.  She was nothing but a prize
for them.”

Of everything
they’d told him so far, that was the least surprising revelation.  Sullivan was
already convinced that Teja was the most magical creature ever born.  The woman
just
glowed
.  He wasn’t sure what to do about the fact she fascinated
him… except try not to embarrass himself by staring.

Teja clearly
wasn’t comfortable with Djinn disclosing that she had an extra dose of
superpowers.  “Sullivan doesn’t need to hear your Cold Kingdom conspiracy
theories, D.”  She began in irritation.  “Eian and Freya wouldn’t target an
innocent human…”

“It’s not a
conspiracy if somebody’s legit plotting against you.”  Djinn argued.  “And
everyone’s
always
plotting against me.  It’s because I’m so damn
heroic.”

“I swear to
Christ, if you bring up your bizarre vendetta against that cow…”

“That cow is
goddamn evil, Tej!”

“Frigging
cow.”  Alder shook his head in disgust.  “She’ll get hers.”  He set to work on
the Etch-A-Sketch “K,” concentrating on retracing the lines as closely as
possible so the word “fuck” was legible.  “Anyhow, Eian and his sister, Freya,
are Teja’s cousins on her dad’s side.”

Teja rubbed
her forehead.  “Sullivan doesn’t want to hear about this, Alder.”  She
repeated, which meant
she
didn’t want to hear about it.  Which meant
Sullivan was suddenly interested in hearing about it.

“Sure he
does!”  Alder insisted.

“Sure I do.” 
Sullivan agreed.  “So Teja’s paternal relatives are even worse than you guys
are, huh?”  He was sorry to hear that, but it explained a lot.  “You poor
girl.  No wonder you’re so hostile all the time.”

Teja flicked
him off.

Sullivan
nearly chuckled.

“I’ll break
this down for you in human-ese, human.  There’s the Fire Phases.”  Djinn gave a
thumbs up sign with one hand.  “We’re
goooood
.”  He drew out the word
like he was trying to communicate information to a basset hound with a low IQ. 
“And then there’s the Cold House.”  He gave a thumbs down with the other hand. 
“They’re
baaaaad
.”  He nodded with exaggerated slowness.  “And I’m
telling you,
those
douchebags are behind your whole mini-amnesia thing. 
Right, Pey?”

“Yep.”

“See?”  Djinn
waved a hand as if Pele’s vote settled the matter.  “The Cold Phases are always
looking for ways to target me.”  He slung one leg over the arm of his chair. 
“God, they are
so
petty.  They just won’t let it go”

“Except, the
Cold Phases didn’t allegedly give
you
amnesia
.
”  Sullivan pointed
out.  “They allegedly gave it to
me
.”  Dear God, he really just said
that gibberish like the words meant something.

“Don’t make
this all about yourself, human.”  Djinn sighed like Tony Montana forever
pondering why he was so misunderstood.  “Let’s focus on how Eian’s unfairly
targeting my House. 
That’s
what important here.  It’s ‘cause I’m a
better cousin, and a better king, and
way
better looking.”  He counted
off those points of comparison on his fingers.  “Meanwhile, Eian’s got no
Match, no kids, bad hair…”

“Tragic
fucking hair.”  Pele lamented.

“I know.” 
Djinn gave a sad shake of his head.  “The list goes on and on.  The guy’s
totally insecure about the fact that he sucks and
he
blames me for it. 
It’s like a Freudian thing, I think.”

“Also you
beat him up that time.”  Pele volunteered.  “It was way hot.”

“The point
is, you can’t
ever
trust a Cold Phase, Sully.”  Alder instructed just in
case Sullivan still didn’t understand that the Fire Phases were inexplicably
cast as the white hats in this soap opera.  “They’re evil.”

“Don’t
worry.  I don’t trust
any
of you.”  Sullivan assured them.

Teja made a
face.  “The Cold Phases aren’t evil.  They’re just boring scientists with a superiority
complex.”  She turned back to Sullivan.  “And what do you mean you don’t trust
us?”  She sounded annoyed again.  Or possibly still.

“I don’t
trust anyone.  It cuts way down on the problems in my life.”

She didn’t
seem satisfied with that answer.  “But, I’m your Match.  You
have
to
trust me.  It’s part of the whole deal.”

“I never
agreed to any deal.”  He was getting tired of being told what he
had
to
do.  “Look, maybe you’re right about all this bullshit.  Maybe there’s a box
that steals happiness…”

“There is.” 
Alder hesitated.  “At least, we
think
that’s what it does.”  He held up
the Etch-a-Sketch so they could all read the squiggly vulgarity.  “Ta-da!”

Sullivan kept
going.  “Maybe my grandfather hid it somewhere in Mayport.”

“He did.” 
Pele assured him.  “Parson would’ve kept it close.”

“Maybe some
mutant war is raging around me.”

“We’re not
mutants!”  Djinn shouted.

Sullivan
disregarded all their commentary, his eyes on Teja.  “But, I don’t
care
about any of that.”  He finished firmly.  “I don’t want any part of this
asylum.  Not the box, not the ‘Phases,’ not
you
.”  He refused to be
fooled by her beauty and magic.  “Hell, keep the gun, if you’re so fascinated
with it.  It doesn’t matter to me.  I’m not one of you weirdoes and I’m not
getting mixed up in your weirdo games.  I just want to go home.”

She frowned. 
“But, it might not be safe to…”