Man Candy (22 page)

“Wow okay,” I said in shock once my realization hit me.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Ben. It’s just this is all I have in me to give right now.”

“You know what, Riss. That’s bullshit. You gave as good as you got.” I didn’t like being wrong, but even knowing I might have pressured her into more with me, I knew she enjoyed every single joke, every touch, every date, every phone call. Everything. You couldn’t fake that kind of joy.

“Why can’t we just be friends with benefits? What’s so wrong with that?” She kept at it making me want to scream.

“Friends with benefits is another way of saying that I’m good enough to hang out with, good enough to sleep with but never good enough to be with.”

She flinched at my words and remorse passed over her face. “I just don’t know what I’m doing when it comes to this... relationship.”

“You don’t have to know. We can figure it out together,” I said softly.

“I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” she whispered.

“I know and I didn’t mean to pressure you. You need to communicate better with me so we don’t end up blowing up on each other. If you had talked to me about this weeks ago, it wouldn’t have been such a big thing.” I drew her in my arms and held her to my chest.

“It was meeting your mom,” she admitted guiltily.

“What was?”

“It pushed me over the edge. I just kept thinking that things were moving too fast. I just broke it off with Scott and I didn’t want to get too attached I guess,” she said into my shirt.

I placed my finger under her chin and tipped her face up to mine. “Do you even see a future with us?”

“I don’t know,” she whispered, and I saw tears welling up in her troubled looking eyes.

“What are you so afraid of?”

She shrugged but didn’t answer. I was so damn frustrated with her, but at least we were finally getting somewhere.

“I know I only asked for a chance but you actually have to give me one, sweetheart. I’ve never wavered from who I’ve said I am. I’ve always treated you with respect and showed you how beautiful and special I think you are. I’ve never given you a reason to think I was going to screw you over or become something I’m not. What is it going to take?”

“I don’t know. I just know that if I let myself believe this time is different and it’s not, I won’t be able to handle another letdown.”

“I care about you... deeply. Just give me a chance. A real one.”

“I
want
to be impulsive. I do. I don’t want to overthink every little thing.”

“So don’t.”

“It’s not that easy, Ben.”

“Sure it is. Just don’t do it. I asked you before and I’ll ask it again. Be in the moment with me? Don’t worry about the future or what might have happened in the past. Just be with me. Here. Now. Will you do that?”

“I’ll try.”

“That’s all I’m asking for.”

Being at a signing with Tanner was actually better than I had anticipated. We seemed to feed off each other’s energies. He was fun and drew most of the attention to him, which allowed me to be center stage without having to be
center stage
. It was the perfect balance, and I always enjoyed hanging with him even when he drove me crazy, so in the end it worked out.

The four of us had flown into Denver together the day before when I was able to score a last minute ticket on their flight. Things seemed to be less strained between Rissa and me since our blow up. I didn’t pressure her for more of her time, and in turn she found ways to free herself up from work. It seemed like a nice compromise, and I was content with the results. I had faith that we would figure it out. She just needed to trust me a little more, and I needed to make sure I didn’t unintentionally smother her independent streak.

“Can I get a picture with the two of you?” a younger woman asked eyeing Tanner and me with equal amounts of lust.

“Go get ‘em stud,” Rissa joked from where she stood in between Cassandra and Meredith at their table and patted me on the butt.

My eyes promised her retribution, but my face smiled as I walked over to where the woman was draped over Tanner. He seemed to be in his seventh heaven having so much female adoration in one room. He didn’t seem to mind that they knew nothing about him or even his name in some instances. He was ready with open arms to accept anything they were offering him.

I shot a glance at Meredith to see what she thought of it, but her face gave nothing away. Other than the few eye rolls I saw aimed at him when he was being particularly obnoxious for attention, she barely spared him a glance. It made me wonder yet again what the hell was going on with the two of them. I couldn’t quite get their pulse.

The rest of the afternoon flew by in a whirl of pretty ladies, shy ladies and overly zealous ladies. Whenever I got a chance, I teased Rissa who had surprisingly seemed to have taken the closeness Cassandra and I had in stride. Considering her past with fools like Scott, I was surprised by this. Maybe she finally realized there was nothing to worry about. She was it for me. Now that we were together, I wouldn’t look at another woman let alone get intimate with one.

After the signing, we freshened up before heading out to the roadside steakhouse that Cassandra insisted we try while we were there. It was a rougher place filled with bikers, but everyone was friendly and Cassandra knew many of the staff so it was easier not to feel too much like an outsider.

“I have a proposition,” Cassandra announced halfway through our meal.

Conversations stopped and all eyes turned on her.

“I have one more signing this year and six lined up for next year. Our book releases next month and if it does well I’d like to hire you on, Ben, as my full time cover model extraordinaire. What do you think?”

Taken aback by her request, the answer no immediately formed on my tongue. Before I could say it, she hastily added, “Tanner is going to be with Meredith and we are at most of the same signings together. It will be fun. And of course Rissa will be there too.” She shot Rissa an encouraging smile. “We had so much fun today and I doubled the amount of books I usually sell at a signing with you there.”

“I’m sure it had nothing to do with me.” I shook my head and prepared to politely decline again.

“It did. I know it did. The first signing Tanner was at with us, I shared a table with Meredith and I didn’t do nearly as well as I did today. You’re the only factor that is different in this equation.”

“She has a point,” Meredith stuck her nose in.

“I’ll have to think about. Talk it over with Rissa first,” I politely stalled in answering.

“You should do it,” Rissa chimed in poking holes through my excuse.

“But—” I looked at her inquisitively.

“She’s right. Things were hopping today with you there. We all had fun. No one got too terribly inappropriate and you helped to tone down Tanner’s ego. Besides we’ll get to travel to some great places together. Think of them as mini-vacations.” She gave me a smile that reached her eyes, so I knew she wasn’t just saying this.

“Where are your other signings?” I asked Cassandra.

“Seattle, San Francisco, Austin, Las Vegas, Ft. Lauderdale, Savannah and Boston,” she ticked them off on her fingers.

“And how many are with Meredith?”

“All but Boston and San Francisco.”

“I’m on the waitlist for those so you never know, I might get in,” Meredith added with a smirk behind her bottle of beer.

Could I really do this gig on a regular basis? The first time didn’t seem so bad now that I looked back on it. I think I was more overwhelmed than anything at the time. The last one and this one seemed to be getting progressively easier, and it would be nice to be able to travel with Rissa.

“How about we take it on an event by event basis,” I suggested.

Cassandra slammed her hand down on the table like a gavel and then pointed at me. “Sold!”

I squeezed Rissa’s knee and gave her a smile. Looked like I was now an official model of sorts.

*****

“I’m tired. I think I’ll head back to the room,” Rissa announced on a yawn. I looked at my watch and was surprised to see it was one o’clock in the morning already. Time flies when you’re having fun.

We ended up hanging out in the hotel suite of the blogger who put on the event—drinking, snacking and bullshitting. Sometime after we returned from dinner about a dozen of us—including Tanner, Meredith and Cassandra—had migrated up to the oversized room and decided it would be more fun to play Cards Against Humanity then to go out clubbing with everyone else. I had to admit it was the right choice.

The amount of work it took into successfully putting on an event boggled my mind as we talked that night. I didn’t even know there were book bloggers out there, let alone that they often hosted signings to get readers and authors together.

When I put my hands on the arm of my chair and made to stand up, Rissa waved me off. “You can stay.”

“No. It’s fine. I didn’t realize how late it was. See you guys in the morning.” I nodded my head to my brother and the others.

“Breakfast at ten,” Meredith called out making Rissa groan.

“Can’t I just sleep in one day?” she grumbled.

“No.” Meredith laughed at the stricken expression on Rissa’s face.

“Maybe you shouldn’t schedule so many signings so close together. They jack up my weekends off,” Rissa groused.

“I could always find another assistant,” Meredith threatened.

“You wouldn’t,” Rissa said with confidence.

“Oh I would. Hey, Ben, how would you feel about getting to know another assistant of mine?” Her innuendo was not missed and Rissa looked ready to pounce on her. I knew I needed to intervene before the two fiery redheads went at each other.

“And with that it’s time for us to go.” I grabbed Rissa’s hand and led her out of the room and towards the elevators leaving the sound of Meredith’s cackling behind us.

“She always tries to push my buttons. I swear she likes to see me mad,” Rissa bristled as we waited for the elevator car to arrive.

“Then don’t let her.”

“Easy for you to say,” she scoffed.

When the door opened, I ushered her in with my hand on the small of her back. As we rode down to our floor, I drew slow circles on her back to relax her. It seemed to work and by the time the doors opened again she had put most of her weight on me.

We walked down the hall and rounded the corner to where our room was at the far end of the hall.

“I’m tired,” she said again with a yawn.

“It’s because we’re still on east coast time. It’s three o’clock there.” We stopped in front of the door, and I dug the keycard out of my back pocket.

“That makes sense then. Sometimes traveling has its disadvantages. Tomorrow night when we get back to New York I won’t be able to fall asleep for work.”

“I can stay over if you want and tire you out,” I graciously offered.

“You might have to.”

“I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.”

“Oh I know I will.” She giggled as we stepped into the darkened room. I flipped the switch on and stared in horror at the naked woman lying on bed spread eagle.

Holy shit.

“What the fuck,” I murmured.

Rissa peered around my frozen body and screamed, “Are you fucking shitting me?”

“Who’s this?” the naked woman asked giving a poignant look at Rissa.

“
Who
are
you
is more like it,” Rissa said with barely constrained anger.

“I’m here for Ben. This
is
his room,” the woman said cattily.

Indeed the room was registered to me, but I had no idea who the woman was. Some of the faces of the people I met during the day were a blur to me. There were just too many to try to remember especially when I would most likely never see them again.

Rissa turned her livid gaze on me, and I fought a wince at how evil she looked. Medusa had nothing on her right then.

“Care to explain?” she bit out.

“Not really,” I lamely answered. It wasn’t as if I had an answer for who this chick was let alone how she ended up in my room.

“This is just great,” she muttered under her breath. “Get the fuck out.” She gave the woman a death glare.

Oblivious to the tension in the room, the woman said, “I’m not leaving until he tells me to. Why don’t you scurry along and give us some privacy.”

I quickly grabbed a discarded robe from the floor and threw it onto her to cover her up. “At least put some clothes on,” I grumbled.

“Why aren’t you kicking her out?” Rissa asked distrustfully.

“I’m going to but she needed to cover herself up long enough to tell me how the hell she got in here.”

The woman reached over to the nightstand and held up a key. Rissa’s eyes went from the key to me and if looks could kill I’d be lying on the floor dead.

“It isn’t what it looks like,” I told her.

“It looks like you gave her a fucking key,” she shouted. Her body was stiff, vibrating with tension.

“Rissa,” I said hoping to get her to think rationally. “How could I give her a key? I have mine and you have the other one. Besides it isn’t as if we were going to be apart tonight, so why would I ask her to meet me up here?”

She seemed to think about that for a second before once again turning an arctic glare onto the offending woman. “Where did you get that from?”

For the first time since the whole confrontation started, the woman finally started to look a little nervous. Served her right. Who the hell just showed up in someone’s hotel room naked like that? Then again there was a time when if I were single I probably wouldn’t have minded it. On second thought, it was a tad bit creepy and reminded me a little too much of my blind date from hell on Valentine’s Day.

“I have a friend in housekeeping,” she finally answered with fluster.

“Well your friend is about to lose his or her job.” Rissa stormed over to the phone and picked it up, stabbing the number for the front desk with her finger.

“I suggest you get dressed,” I told the girl with my arms crossed over my chest. She scrambled off the bed and quickly pulled her dress over her head.

“Can we just let this go?” she asked as her eyes darted between Rissa and me.

“What were you thinking?” I asked her while Rissa spoke to management over the phone.

“I don’t know. You were hot. I thought it would be fun.” She shrugged and bent to pick up her shoes from the floor.

I shook my head in disbelief. Unbelievable.

Security promptly came to our room and removed the woman while the night manager begged us for forgiveness and assured us his staff would be dealt with appropriately. After comping our room for the night and having the sheets changed for us, I shut the door on him and warily turned back to face Rissa now that we were alone.

“That was crazy,” I said into the silence.

Tanner and Meredith were really going to get a kick out of the story. I glanced at the clock and saw it was nearing two thirty in the morning. Breakfast wasn’t far enough away.

With a yawn, I pushed my jeans down my legs and kicked them off towards the suitcases. Removing my shirt and socks next, I walked around the bed and pulled the covers back.

“You asked me the other day what I was afraid of,” she started to talk but then stopped and woodenly undressed without saying another word.

“What’s that?” I prompted her.

“This kind of thing is what I’m afraid of. That woman was naked on
our
bed. She was here for
you
. And I can’t stop thinking about what would have happened if I hadn’t been here. You’re going to start traveling with Cassandra. What if a woman comes on to you again and I’m not there?”

“Rissa. I told you that you have nothing to worry about and I meant it. I barely even looked at her.”