Married by Contract (6 page)

His eyebrows shot up. “Seriously? It seems like something
you’d do in college, but I can live with that. I’m an okay dancer.”

Jenn giggled. “You think so?”

“Sure.” He did a little dance for her, keeping his feet
completely still and just moving his hips and his arms. Since he was wearing a
T-shirt and his blue plaid flannel pants, Jenn’s giggling turned into
full-fledged laughter.

Nick stopped dancing and frowned at her. “I’m not that bad.
I’d do better with music.”

Jenn couldn’t seem to stop laughing. She had to prop herself
up against the counter as she tried to catch her breath.

“Seriously,” Nick said, his face softening as he watched her
laughing. “Laugh if you want, but I promise I won’t embarrass you.”

“You’d never embarrass me. But I’m sorry to tell you that
that’s not the kind of dancing she means.”

“What does she mean then?”

“She’s a big fan of
Dancing with the Stars
.”

Nick blinked. “Oh.” Then he seemed to realize what was in
store for him. “
Oh
.”

Jenn giggled again at his aggrieved tone. “I’m just saying,
swinging your hips a little isn’t going to cut it.”

“I can’t do that kind of dancing.”

“You’ll do fine.”

“No, I won’t. I’m definitely going to embarrass you.”

“You’re not going to embarrass me.” Smiling, she stepped
close to him and reached over to grab his arms and place one hand on her waist
and take the other in her hand. “We don’t have to do anything fancy. Just move
around the floor a little.”

Nick looked genuinely befuddled, which wasn’t like him at
all. “But I’m telling you, I don’t know how to move.”

“Just step into me.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, step into me.” She released his hand and patted one
of his thighs. “This leg first.”

Nick did as she told him, and she moved her own foot back
with his step. She guided him in a very simple pattern until they could make
their way around the kitchen floor without his stepping on her feet.

She honestly didn’t care if he could dance or not. They
could stand on the sidelines at the party and drink wine, for all she cared.
But he appeared to be genuinely worried about it, which she couldn’t help but
think was kind of sweet.

Once he’d basically gotten the hang of it, he loosened up
and acted more like himself. He tried to dip her once and almost dropped her,
and then frowned at her indignantly when she laughed at him.

That just made her laugh even more, since he was clearly
hamming it up for her benefit.

“Okay,” she said, managing to keep a straight face. “Let’s
try once more and then call it good.”

So they danced in the kitchen, her in thick socks and Nick
in his pajama pants, and for a few minutes, Jenn couldn’t pull her gaze away
from his warm expression.

Something soft and rich and deep filled her chest, and it
felt completely natural when he pulled her into a hug. She hugged him back,
holding onto his familiar body with an urgency that surprised her.

“I hope you don’t mind practicing with me some more,” he
murmured against her ear, “because I’m going to need a lot of help.”

“That’s fine. I’ll practice with you all you want.”

Truth be told, she kind of liked the idea of dancing with
him in the kitchen in the evenings for the next week.

It felt different from sex, but just as good.

Late on the next Friday evening,
Nick and Jenn were leaving Raina’s party.

Jenn had hired a car for the night, so they could both have
a few drinks without worrying about the drive home. She was giving Nick a
little push to get him into the backseat of the car when a voice from behind
her made her turn around.

Raina had run out onto the sidewalk to say goodbye. “I’m so
glad you were able to come,” she said, giving Jenn a hug.

Jenn was feeling tired but good, and she hugged her friend
back. “I’m glad we were able to come too.”

Raina leaned down to glance into the car, where Nick was
waiting. She gave him a wave and, when she straightened up, she whispered to
Jenn, “Your husband is absolutely adorable. You know that, don’t you?”

“Yes, I know that.” Jenn felt like she’d been given the
compliment herself, and she could sense her cheeks warming slightly. “He’s
great.”

“When you two first got married, I was so surprised, since
he didn’t seem like your type at all.”

Nick wasn’t her type. He was different from Jenn in almost
every way. She wasn’t surprised Raina had been so startled by her choice of a
husband.

“But it totally works for you two,” Raina added. “You’re so
good together, and I think he really brings out the best in you.”

Jenn swallowed, momentarily confused about how to respond to
that comment. “Uh, yeah, I guess he does.”

“I’m sure you bring out the best in him too,” Raina said,
looking like she was worried she’d said something wrong. “I just never knew him
before you.”

“I know. I know exactly what you’re saying. I do think we’re
good for each other.”

Jenn didn’t like to feel like she was lying to her friend.
It was one of the reasons she’d spent less time with Raina since her marriage
to Nick. But it felt like she was telling the truth right now. Nick was good
for her, and she hoped—in some way—she might be good for him too.

She wanted to be. In a way that had nothing to do with the
money she provided.

She gave Raina another hug and then climbed into the
backseat of the car beside Nick, waving at Raina as the car pulled away from
the curb.

“What was that all about?” Nick asked.

“She was telling me how adorable you are.”

“Really?” He looked tired but rather pleased by this
comment.

“Yes.”

“And it wasn’t a pity-compliment since I made such a mess
with the dancing?”

Jenn laughed. “It wasn’t a pity-compliment. She really thinks
you’re adorable. And you didn’t mess up the dancing.”

“Uh, no need to lie to me.”

“I’m not lying.”

“You did feel me step on your toes, didn’t you?”

“Yes, but it wasn’t that bad. You were just as good or
better than about half the men there. It was really nice of you to try.”

“Hey, I’m your husband. That’s my job, right?”

Jenn experienced a strange little flicker in her chest.
“Right. I guess so.”

The mood between them shifted slightly, in a way she
couldn’t fully articulate, and they fell into silence. After a minute, Nick
reached over and pulled her closer to him, so she was leaning against his side,
his arm wrapped around her.

She felt better that way, and she relaxed against his
warmth. She’d had three drinks at the party, so her mind was a little fuzzy but
not incoherent. They didn’t normally sit in the backseat of the car cuddled up
together this way, but it felt right at the moment so she didn’t question it.

“Did you have a good time?” she asked, after a few minutes.
She glanced up to check his expression and saw it was sober.

“Sure.”

“You’re awfully quiet.”

“Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Nothing, really.”

She knew that meant he didn’t want to tell her, and she made
herself hold back and not press him for more information. If he didn’t want to
talk, then he didn’t have to. That was fine. It wasn’t any of her business
anyway.

Despite these sensible reflections, she heard herself
asking, “What were you talking about with Marsha Hilton?”

Marsha had gone to college with Raina and Jenn, and she was
from the same hometown as Jenn and Nick—so she’d known them growing up. She and
Jenn had never been very close, and Jenn had been surprised when she’d seen the
woman talking to Nick for at least ten minutes earlier in the evening.

“Nothing.”

“It was a long talk for it to be nothing.”

Nick let out a long breath, and his free hand moved over to
idly pick up one of Jenn’s from her lap. “She was asking about my job. And she
was talking about my parents.”

“What about your parents?”

“Nothing specific. Just talking about how they were doing.”

Jenn understood his mood then. It wasn’t a dark or bleak
mood, really. It was just quiet and a little heavy because he’d been thinking
about his parents. She wanted to help him—and make him feel better—but she
wasn’t sure how to do that. After reflecting for a minute, she said, “You
should go visit them. I can go with you, if you want.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, you should? Or yeah, you’ll do it?”

“Yeah, I should, and maybe I will.” He was fiddling with her
fingers, gently rubbing her wedding ring.

“You’ll feel better if you go see them,” she said carefully.
She didn’t want to offend him or make him pull back, but it felt like she
needed to say something, like maybe this was one way she could be good for him,
the way he was so good for her. “You only feel bad because you feel guilty.”

“I know.” He didn’t sound annoyed or defensive. Just
resigned.

“Why is it so hard?” she asked, looking up at his face
again. “You love them and you want to see them and you know you should. So why
is it so hard to make yourself do it?”

“
Because
it is hard. That’s why. They’re getting old,
and it’s hard for me to see them like that. I don’t do things that are hard
anymore.”

She frowned. “Yes, you do.”

“No, I really don’t. I don’t…put myself out there to be
hurt.”

“Well, that’s just part of your coping. It’s the way you’re
trying to deal with…with everything.” She didn’t want to imply he was damaged
from his experiences in the military, although both of them knew that he was.
“It’s not going to be forever. And maybe you can…you can push through a little
bit right now, so you can feel better in the long run.”

His arms tightened around him. “I know you’re right. It’s
like you knowing that you need to stop stressing so much. Just because you know
it doesn’t mean you can do it.”

“I know. But I’ve been working on not stressing. I think you
can probably work on…on stepping up.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, think about it, at least. I’ll go with you, if you
want me to.”

“Thanks.”

He was still stroking her fingers, her wedding ring, but he
didn’t say anything else, and Jenn knew she’d pushed as far as she could for
the evening.

They sat quietly as the driver took them through the mostly
empty streets. It was late and dark and strangely silent in the world.

When they were almost home, Nick tilted his head down and
brushed a kiss into her hair.

“What was that for?” she asked, raising her eyes to his
face.

“That was because you’re so brave and sweet and generous.”

Her breath hitched in her throat. “I am not.”

He gave a soft huff of amusement. “Yes, you are, sweetheart.
You have no idea how much.”

She was deeply touched by the words, by how much he seemed
to mean them. She had no idea what to say, but the car had pulled up to the
curb in front of their building, so she didn’t have to say anything.

Back in their apartment, she went into her bedroom to change
clothes, still feeling fluttery and confused. She’d only gotten as far as
taking off her shoes when there was a tap on her door.

She swung it open to find Nick, standing in front of her,
wearing his trousers with no shirt and no shoes.

They’d been having sex three or four times a week, but
usually only on evenings when the mood was teasing and playful between them.
She’d assumed he’d gone into his own room so he could deal with his mood by
himself. She was so surprised to see him now she just stared at him.

“Would you like to…” he began, sounding very hoarse.

“Yes!” Overwhelmed with feelings she just didn’t understand,
she reached out for him, pulling him down into a kiss.

He kissed her back, hard and hungry, and then he walked her
back toward her bed. They didn’t talk at all as they kissed and caressed and
took off each other’s clothes, and they were both strangely urgent as they made
love under the covers.

Jenn needed it—needed him—more than she could ever remember
needing anything. And it felt like, at least for tonight, he needed her too.

For now, that was enough. She wouldn’t let herself think
about how it would feel when their marriage was over and Nick finally walked
away.

***

The following week, Jenn was sitting
in her office, reading over monthly financial statements and trying not to get
a headache.

She’d been feeling stressed all morning. At several points,
she’d reached for her phone to call Nick, but she’d managed to resist the urge
each time.

Yes, talking to him would make her feel better, but she
didn’t want to get dependent on him. They only had two more years left of their
five year marriage. She was already enjoying being with him so much that it
would be really hard when they parted ways, so she needed to be careful not to
make it any harder on herself than it had to be.

She was rubbing her forehead and trying to focus when her Mary
tapped on her door before opening it. “You’ve got someone to see you.”

Jenn blinked. “What?” She checked her calendar to assure
herself no one was scheduled. “Who is it?”

“Your husband.”

“Really? What is he doing here?” Despite her rigorous
attempts to be reasonable, she couldn’t keep down the rising of excitement at
this news.

“He just came to see you, of course.” Mary was grinning as
if something very romantic was happening. Nick had probably been hamming up the
devoted husband act out there in the reception area.

“Well, send him in.”

Nick never stopped by to see her, and this fact suddenly
made her worry that something might be wrong.

Her sliver of concern faded when she saw his lazy grin as he
entered. He was holding a paper bag. “I was working down the street this
morning, so I picked up some lunch,” he explained. “Then I figured, since I was
so close, I might as well get some for you too.”

She couldn’t keep the smile off her face. “Then come in. I’m
famished.”

Nick closed the door behind him and went to the conference
table near the window, where he started to unpack the bag, pulling out
sandwiches, salads, and little packages that must be dessert. While he did
that, Jenn grabbed a couple of bottles of water from the refrigerator in the kitchenette
area against one of the walls in her office and then made a stop at her
computer to adjust her schedule, moving her lunch break from 12:30 to 12:15.

“What are you doing?” Nick asked. He’d come over without her
noticing and was now peering over her shoulder.

“I’m changing my schedule.”

“Don’t both you and Mary already know you’re eating at 12:15
instead of 12:30?”

“Well, yeah, but I like to keep my calendar tidy.”

He chuckled and reached out to give her a one-armed hug. “Of
course you do.”

“Did you come to eat or to mock me?”

“Is there a rule that says I can’t do both?”

She made a face at him, entirely for show, and they went
over to the table to eat their lunch.

Jenn greatly enjoyed it. Nick had splurged on the food—he
usually gravitated toward cheaper restaurants—and between them, they ate
everything he’d brought. He asked her about her morning, and she complained to
him about how horrible it was to review financial statements. Then he told her
about how things were going on his case looking for the missing teenaged girl,
concluding that if he didn’t have a concrete lead in another two weeks, he was
going to have to tell her parents that he couldn’t continue. He couldn’t keep
taking their money and not have any real progress to show for it.

When Nick finally started to pick up their trash, Jenn
glanced at the time and was shocked to see that it was already 1:13. “I can’t
believe we had lunch for a whole hour!”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing, really. Only I usually just take twenty minutes or
so.”

“Since you were getting a headache, it’s just as well you
took a longer break.”

She smiled at him, wondering if there was a man in the world
more adorable than he was. “Yeah. That’s probably right.”

“That’s definitely right.” He grabbed her hand as she was
heading back for her desk. “You can’t work late today and use lunch as an
excuse.” His eyes were very warm, and they never left her face.

She had to fight a most ridiculous case of the flutters.
“Just so you know, I can work late any day I want.”

“True, but then you don’t get a massage when you come home
with a terrible headache.”

“Oh. That wouldn’t be good at all.”

“That’s what I’m saying.” He was still holding her hand,
idly rubbing her palm. “So no working past six today.”

“That seems like a very logical decision. And I’ll just
ignore the fact that you’re sounding rather bossy.”

“Sometimes even you need to be bossed.”

She was so caught up in his fond gaze that she found herself
swaying toward him. “I never need to be bossed.”

His voice was thicker when he murmured, “I’m here to testify
that that isn’t true.”

“It is true. I’m unbossable.”

Nick chuckled, and the sound was so intoxicating that there
was no telling what she might have done next.