Matt & Brooklyn: A Standalone in the "Again for the First Time" Family Saga (AFTFT Book 2) (16 page)

We’d get through this together.

Chapter Seven

Brooklyn

L.A. left me drained. I got in the night before and crashed. Well, I
tried
to, anyway; it felt so strange to be sleeping in my own bed; strange being so far away from Matt again. That was something I wasn’t expecting. After spending a week with him, I was starting to feel sort of at home there. I’d gotten into a routine, knew my way around his house, but now I was back in Lindmore with luggage to unpack. One of my biggest pet peeves was trying to live out of a suitcase, so I made that first on my list of things to do this morning after I picked Dallas up from Lissy’s.

My shoes were back in the closet, purses back on the rack. I had gotten just about everything put away when I came across the t-shirt I wore the night Matt and I pushed the boundaries of our friendship. I couldn’t help but to grin
.
It was all still so fresh in my head and at the risk of getting caught up, I allowed myself to linger in that memory for a little while longer.

He was so sure we could make it that even
I
was starting to believe it. Not falling under his spell was difficult; his argument was sound. He kept reiterating that we would be so good together, but… I just couldn’t let myself fall completely. What if he was wrong?

The cool metal of my grandmother’s necklace grazed my palm when I placed a hand over my throat. I’d practically forgotten I was even wearing it. Pulling it away from my skin, I looked it over, remembering the story that initially brought it into our family. My grandmother’s
‘one that got away’,
Matt’s grandfather, had given it to her years ago. In a roundabout way, it was a rose that started it all, so I was sure that inspired Matt’s granddad to choose a rose pendant as her gift.

This particular love story weighed so heavily on the hearts of the women in my family, hence the reason this flower had even made its way into my name. I came from a long line of hopeless romantics who weren’t afraid to bet everything on love. I wasn’t sure why that gene missed
me,
but it had. I didn’t consider that a good thing or a bad thing, but it definitely made my experiences different from my sisters.

They each had a story to tell where they’d followed their hearts. Lissy and Luke’s situation aside, there was Bean—she married her ex, Chris, right out of high school because she simply couldn’t stand to be away from him. Delia and her husband Cal met on a blind date, hit it off the first night, and were married within six months. Even the way Aura and Darren met was somewhat serendipitous. She was working third shift as a waitress in college. Not knowing his gage was broken, Darren’s car just happened to run out of gas right in front of the restaurant where she worked and then
boom!
They fell in love and have been together ever since. Everyone but me had taken a chance and stepped out on faith at some point.

I let the necklace fall back into place, thinking of Matt in New Mexico instead. This had to be so exciting for him, getting noticed, being on the set of a highly anticipated film. He hadn’t had much time to talk since he got there, but being the thoughtful person that he is, he sent a text to say he’d call to check in whenever the crew broke for lunch and I was sure he would skip out on precious sleep time to talk later, too. Without either of us coming straight out and saying it, these were delicate times between us. With our feelings so exposed, so visible, a lack of communication could easily be misconstrued for something else—a change of heart, avoidance, regret. So the fact that Matt was doing everything in his power to show me that he wasn’t experiencing
any
of those things… earned him some major points.

My things were now back in their rightful places, so I lie in bed with my laptop. It felt lonely here now, which wasn’t the case before I left for California. I’d gotten used to having another set of footsteps in the house with me, though; someone to communicate with face-to-face when I felt like it. But not here. Instantly, I found myself looking forward to going to pick up Lia soon, even more than I already had been. Hopefully, she would make this transition a little easier, but it wasn’t lost on me that once I left with Raj and the others, there would be no quick fixes to remedy the lonesomeness. The isolation would be real.

The blank screen stared back as me as my fingers hovered over the keys. I typed in the web address for the school where I’d be assisting Raj in South Africa. The pictures painted such a beautiful visual in my head of the campus. If the circumstances had been any different, I would have had a smile on my face as I clicked through the photo gallery, but I didn’t. Instead, I felt queasy and had to close my laptop, shoving it aside for now.

Ugh… I’m just gonna go get Lia.

“Watch out, Dallas.”

At my words, my very spoiled cat hopped down from the bed to the floor and I stood to my feet. It felt ironic that I was about to try to help Lia through her personal issues while my
own
life was so all over the place right now, but that’s what family is for. I’d pretend like I had it all together for the next week or two while I had Lia with me, then maybe I’d focus on me.

Yeah… that sounds like a plan.

After a quick shower and rummaging through my closet for something to wear, I was out the door and headed for my sister’s. The drive didn’t take more than fifteen minutes. I pulled into the driveway of Bean’s two-story and climbed out the car. What I was
not
expecting was to be greeted by the sound of yelling when I made it to the front door.

They were at it again, Bean and TaLia.

I couldn’t hear what they were screaming about, but one thing was for sure; I was right to intervene. They needed a break from one another and hopefully after Lia and I hashed things out, she’d return home refreshed and ready to start over with her mom.

I slammed my palm into the front door several times before someone heard me. There was stomping on the other side of the threshold and I waited. Bean answered the door looking exhausted—physically, mentally.

“She’s all yours,” she greeted me, handing off a large suitcase at the same time.

I didn’t even know what to say. The next thing I knew, Lia was breezing past her mom without a goodbye and headed straight for my car with a backpack slung over her shoulder and her cello in hand.

“Good luck,” Bean said, shutting the door on me the next second.

I knew she wasn’t upset with me, just fired up from the argument with my niece, but still; I felt a chill from both of them.

Slowly, I made my way to the car, reminding myself the entire way that I, too, had been a moody teenager once upon a time and now it was my turn to pay it forward. As she climbed into the passenger seat, I observed Lia pouting with her arms folded over her chest. Clearly, she wasn’t in the mood to socialize, but that didn’t stop me from speaking to her.

“Wanna tell me what that was about?” I asked, looking over my shoulder as I backed out the driveway.

“Not really,” she sighed.

I expected that. “Fair enough,” I replied. “Did you at least remember to grab your inhaler while you two were in there clawing each other’s eyes out?”

Lia tried not to smile, but she did a little. “Yes.”

I nodded. “Okay, both of them?”

“Yes,” she answered again, digging into the side of the book bag she’d brought with her. Next, she handed me the extra inhaler, which was our routine because her asthma was so severe. She kept one and I held onto the other in case there was an emergency.

“Thanks,” I said, shoving it inside my purse while driving.

She was quiet and I knew she wouldn’t tell me any more about her mom right now, so I went in another direction.

“What’ve you been doing so far this summer to keep busy?”

Lia shrugged, but loosened up a bit. “Learning a new arrangement on my cello. Julian’s been helping me get it right,” she added, giving credit to her best friend—a boy, which made me very nervous for her.

She and Julian met a few years ago when Bean started giving him piano lessons. He seemed like a nice enough kid, but, from what I heard, he had some trouble in his past. Even Bean wasn’t sure what that trouble might be; however, when he and Lia hit it off, he seemed to change for the better, started acting just like any other kid.

He had a year or two on Lia, so he was around seventeen to her fifteen going on sixteen, but they were like two peas in a pod, from what Bean said, bonding over music.

“He’s doing okay? Julian?” I clarified.

Lia nodded. “Yeah, just busy with soccer.”

That was good. I liked to hear kids keeping busy, keeping out of trouble. That was one thing I commended my sister on. She kept hers in extracurricular activities and they were better for it. Bad things happened when kids, teenagers especially, sat idle.

No one knew that better than me.

“How was L.A.?” Lia asked, cutting into my thoughts. “Beautiful, wasn’t it?”

Her question made me smile, although I tried not to.

“It was… nice,” was all I said back, but of course an image of being taken against Matt’s bedroom wall flashed into my head. I hadn’t stopped thinking about that since it happened.

“How’s Matt?” she added. “I miss him. Is he coming back for Thanksgiving? That was fun last year.”

All
the kids loved him. I figured it was his big, childlike heart that drew them to him.

“He says he is,” I replied, but the next thought that came to mind was that I probably wouldn’t be here myself. Not if I took this position in Johannesburg with Raj and the others. My stomach did a flip.

“Cool,” Lia added with a smile. “I think Julian is coming for Thanksgiving
and
Christmas this year, too, so it should be fun.”

I nodded. “Yeah… should be.”

I kind of shut down after that. On the one hand, I was grateful Raj thought of me for this opportunity, but on the other, I found myself wishing I could just live out this upcoming year the way I’d been planning—working close to home, getting to see my family…

…Getting to see Matt.

It killed me knowing that work was about to bring him back close to Lindmore,
into
Lindmore if he was able to work something out with this documentary. He’d be here, but I wouldn’t. That seemed so ironic to me.

I still had no idea how to tell him that I was even
thinking
about leaving, especially now that the lines of our friendship had become so obscure. He was still a friend, but… he kind of felt like more than that now. I
hated
that he felt like more than that, but it was true.

“What’re we doing today?” Lia chimed in.

Smiling at her, I gave a shrug. “Whatever you want. I didn’t make any plans.”

She gave me a look, a side-eye and a grin. “You didn’t make any plans? Lame,” she added, smiling big now.

I shoved her arm and laughed. “We could…” I paused to think. “We could go bowling, or shopping, or…”

“Oh! Shopping!”

I should’ve known that would be her choice. As soon as I could do so, I turned the car around and headed for the mall. The second I stopped at a light, a text message came through, prompting Lia and I both to check our phones. To her dismay, it was me this time.

Matt. ‘
Busy?’

‘On my way to the mall. What’s up?’
I typed back.

‘
Nothing
.
Still on set
,
but I was thinking about you. I’m pretty sure my beach is missing you right now, though
.’ I smiled because he knew my schedule. If I’d been in L.A., I would’ve definitely been out on his deck right now. However, I had a feeling
‘the beach’
wasn’t what, or who, felt like my presence was lacking.

My face warmed as I sat there staring at his words. Since he left six months ago, it was true that he missed me and I missed him, but we weren’t in the habit of telling one another so. This was new;
different
, but not in a bad way.

The light still hadn’t turned so I sat there with my finger lingering over the screen, trying to figure out how to respond.