Mending Places (11 page)

Natalie closed the book.
His Needs, Her Needs
had revealed problems within their marriage. They’d been just floating along, expecting the current of life to carry them together in the right direction. Especially since the boys had been born. After meeting their needs all day, she’d hardly had the energy or desire to worry about Keith’s needs.

And her own needs had been neglected as well. No wonder their marriage wasn’t working. She couldn’t make Keith meet her needs, but she could try to meet his. Starting with what the book said is often a husband’s numberone need: sexual fulfillment.

Natalie thought about the woman Hanna had called. Was she having an affair with Keith? She shook off the thought. Tonight she’d think only about her marriage.

What had happened to their sex life? It used to be good. Satisfying. Keith used to want her all the time, but it had been months since he’d shown a real interest. She suspected she’d turned him away one too many times, tired from the daily demands of motherhood.

But that was easy enough to fix. With her boys at her parents’ house for the night, she had a plan to set her marriage back on the right track. She went to the master bedroom and rooted through her lingerie drawer. Somewhere in there was a sexy nightie or two. Way in the back corner, her hand found the garment. She pulled it out and shook out the wrinkles. She’d worn it on their honeymoon and several more times after she’d seen Keith’s approval.

She tossed it in the dryer to smooth out the silky, black material, then rounded up varioussized candles. For a moment she debated whether she should light them yet. Keith might not be home for hours. On the other hand, he could come home any minute. She lit them, silently imploring them to burn slowly, and placed them randomly around the bedroom and bathroom. The bathwater would have to wait, but she removed the boys’ water toys and set out the only bottle of bath bubbles she could find, a yellow container shaped in the form of Big Bird.

She removed the negligee from the dryer, pleased when she saw it was wrinkle free. She laid it on the bed, then went to the refrigerator and peeked inside. A half-empty jug of grape juice sat in the back, and she pulled it out, poured it into two fluted glasses, then set them back in the fridge to keep them cold.

Back in the bedroom, she shimmied out of her jeans and T-shirt and into the flimsy negligee, relieved that it still fit. She walked to the floor-length mirror and tried to view herself objectively. She was fortunate she’d inherited a fast metabolism that kept her thin without much effort. I
sure need some sun, though.
Her long legs, though pale, were her best feature, and the French-cut legs of the garment made them seem even longer, but her knees were as knobby as ever. Squared shoulders and an ample bustline balanced out her hips nicely, but as she turned to the side, she admitted her stomach was no longer flat.
Well, with two pregnancies, what can I expect?

All in all, not bad. Especially if she dimmed the lights. She twisted her hair up and secured it with a clip, pulling down tendrils around her face. She glanced at her watch, then slipped under the covers with a novel.

Time passed slowly. She didn’t know if the book was boring or if she was simply too anxious to give it her full attention.

Finally she heard the overhead garage door, and she jumped out of bed to retrieve the goblets from the fridge. She’d just made it back to bed when the garage door clicked open. She heard the clink of coins being emptied out of his pockets.

Natalie folded down the covers to expose her full body, then propped a pillow against the backboard and lay back. She heard the TV snap on, followed by a sports commentator analyzing a play. Would he even come find her? She heard him tap across the kitchen’s tile floor and open the refrigerator. She looked at the goblets on the nightstand and decided to stop him before he grabbed a Coke. “Keith?”

“Huh?” The fridge’s door snapped shut.

“Can you come here a minute?”

She heard his footsteps as he crossed the house. Her heart thudded like it had on their wedding night. She felt heat prickles under her arms and at the back of her neck.

Keith appeared in the doorway. He stopped, his eyes widening slightly at the sight of her. His gaze took in the candles, then swept back over her.

Her nerves clattered in the strange language of expectation. She sucked in her stomach, then deliberately curled one leg behind as she rolled on her side.

“What’s this all about?” He loosened his tie and dropped it on the window seat.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Her lips curled in what she hoped was a seductive smile, but he wasn’t looking.

He sighed. “It’s nice to see this side of you, Nat, but I’m kind of tired. It was a long day.”

Disappointment snagged at her, but she was determined not to give up.

He sat on his side of the bed and removed his shoes.

Quickly, before he could get up, Natalie scooted over behind him. She let her hands roam his shoulders. “How about a backrub? There, how does that feel?” On her knees, she kneaded with both hands, noting the tight muscles in his shoulders.

He sighed deeply, then let his shoulders sag in relaxation.

“Why don’t you tell me about your day?”

“Not much to tell. Same old stuff.”

She worked his neck with her fingers. “Do you remember the first time I wore this?”

She took his grunt for a no.

“It was on our honeymoon. Remember the night you were on the terrace overlooking the falls, and I came to the patio door? I still remember your words. You said, ‘I’ve never seen a more beautiful sight.’ I thought you were talking about the falls at first.” She slipped her arms around his chest and pressed herself against his back. She kissed the tip of his ear while her hands roamed his chest.

Suddenly he pulled her hands away and stood. “That felt great, thanks.”

Her hope faltered again. “Come back to bed, Keith.” The request came out like a plea.

“I told you, Nat, I’m tired. I just want to kick back and relax.” He started for the door.

She scurried after him and turned him toward her. “How about taking a bath with me then. It’s been years since we’ve done that.” She slipped one hand in his and turned his face toward hers with the other. “Come on, Keith,” she coaxed, pulling his hand as she started toward the bathroom.

He jerked his hand from hers. “No, Nat. I said I’m tired; now leave me alone!”

She watched, shivering, as he left the room. Icy fingers of dread crept through her veins, freezing her to the core.

He was cheating. He was being satisfied by someone else. Darts of pain pierced her heart at the thought. She covered her trembling lips with her fingers as a sob threatened to escape.

Please, God, no.
She slipped on one of Keith’s dress shirts and followed him into the living room. He lounged in his recliner, his face intent on the TV. She drew the two ends of the shirt together, suddenly feeling naked. “It’s true, isn’t it?” Her deadpan voice barely sounded over the TV. “Isn’t it?” she bit out.

“What?” he snapped.

“Who is she, Keith?”

The animosity in his gaze didn’t impede her desire, her need, to know the truth.

“I know there’s someone else; stop playing games with me!”

His gaze returned to the screen.

“Who is it?”

A commercial came on, and he began surfing the channels.

She grabbed the remote and flung it across the room. “Stop it! I want to know the truth! Why won’t you just say it? Say it, Keith!”

He kicked in the footrest and stood. “Fine, it’s true! All right? There
is
someone else! Are you happy now?”

His words sliced her whole being. As if a truckload of tar had been poured on her, she sunk to the floor and collapsed.

Tears poured as a moan tore from her soul and pierced the air.
Why? Why?
Sobs, wrenched from the deepest part of her, erupted.
Why God?

“Who is it?” The words raked across her throat, sounding nothing like her own voice.

Silence met her plea. She found the strength to lift her head. He wasn’t there. She pulled herself up and staggered through the house, when she reached the bedroom, she saw him. Putting on his shoes as if it was just another day. As if he weren’t betraying her. “Who is she?” She spewed the words with a bitterness she didn’t know she was capable of

“You should know; you called her, didn’t you?”

“Called her?” Nat’s mind spun at a dizzying speed. “That was Hanna, not me. Who is she? Why are you doing this? How could you do this?”

He sprung off the bed and started past her.

Malignant fury seized her. She grabbed his arm and spun him around, pummeling his chest with her fists. “Who is she?” She cursed, blinded by the vicious assault of emotions. “Tell me!”

He grabbed her hands hard. “It’s over, Nat! Do you hear me, it’s over.”

Terror surged through her, dark and overwhelming. “You don’t mean that.”

He turned and walked to the living room, pocketing his wallet and keys.

“Where are you going?” She followed, wiping at the wetness on her face.

“To somebody who cares.”

“I care!” She caught up with him and clutched his arms. “Can’t you see? I’ve been trying!”

He shook her off “It’s too little, too late, Nat.” Then he opened the door to leave.

“Don’t go!”

The door slammed.

“Don’t go!” She pounded the door, sliding weightlessly to the cold ceramic as sobs shook her frame. “Don’t go!”

CHAPTER NINE
 

Hanna pulled the sheet up around her shoulders and sighed. Sleep eluded her tonight, and it was no wonder. It seemed she had more problems than she could handle. Nat’s marriage problems weighed on her. Grams forgetfulness worried her. She’d seen enough TV programs on Alzheimer’s disease to know Gram had some of the symptoms. She needed to tell her dad. More importantly, she needed to convince Gram to make a doctor’s appointment.

And then there were the cancellations. Another one had been called in today. As if the other concerns weren’t enough, she was also dealing with her own issues. Her mind flashed back to earlier in the evening when she’d taken a canoe out on the lake. Devon had been there, finishing up for the day, and had shown her to the red canoe. When she’d stepped down into it, her foot had slipped on the wet dock, and she’d nearly gone into the lake. But he’d reached out and grabbed her around the middle.

She shuddered at the suffocating feel his grasp had provoked. From the time he’d grabbed her, she’d wanted loose, even if that meant falling into the lake, and it wasn’t just because he’d held her longer than necessary. Whether it was a shoe salesman or a hug at church, she was repelled by a man’s touch. When would she get over it?

Lord, I feel so many burdens right now. Help me to give them over to You. Heal my spirit in the place that’s wounded. Make me ready for the day
when You bring a man into my life. Prepare my heart and take away these feelings of fear, Lord.

Hanna stopped and tied the laces of her hiking boots. Her muscles ached, but almost in a good way. She’d been inside too long. Out here, breathing the moist air laden with the scent of pine and creosote, she felt alive and refreshed. Despite the two layers of socks she’d put on that morning, she could already feel a blister forming on the back of her heel. She’d taken this trip many times with her grandfather but hadn’t gone since she was a teenager. And her body felt it. She hadn’t known she was in such sorry shape. The canoe trip to the base of the mountain was as much fun as she remembered, but the steep footpaths drained her of energy.

They took frequent water breaks, more often than Hanna suspected was usual, since three adolescent Schaeffer boys were in the group. Their parents walked in front along with Micah, and she could hear him educating them about the wilderness and Grand Teton National Park. The boys trailed after them, followed by Mr. and Mrs. Thompson. Hanna, who rounded up the group, shook her head. Even through the sweaty, dirty climbs, the honeymooners had scarcely let go of one another.

Occasionally, Micah would give the boys a pop quiz on safety or point out a tree, plant, or animal, challenging them to find another like it.