Merlin's Children (The Children and the Blood) (23 page)

“Blasted thing,” he muttered. He glanced back at Lily. “What’s your pleasure, kid? We’ve got grape, orange, and cherry… I think. Red’s tricky, so don’t quote me on the last one.”

Lily’s brow drew down, her expression lost between confusion and caution.

“Popsicles, girl,” he explained as though it was obvious. “What’s the matter? No one ever told you you’re supposed to eat dessert first?”

An incredulous grin surfaced on Lily’s face as if it wasn’t sure it should be there. She cast a look to Cole, who was standing by the door, and then shrugged. “Grape?”

“Best choice.”

Ashe suppressed a smile as she reached the other side of the room. A dozen buckets stood in two groups in the corner of the kitchen, with permanent marker scrawl on their sides denoting their purpose. Moving past the white buckets labeled ‘drink’, she dipped the rag into one of the blue containers of water intended for washing and then began cleaning her face and arms.

“So where’d that happen?” Spider asked quietly, coming up behind her.

Ashe paused halfway through wiping her arm and glanced over. Hoisting herself onto the countertop, the other girl grimaced as her hand landed in a patch of dirt. Wiping her palm on her jeans, Spider jerked her chin toward the smears of dried blood. Across the room, Bus seemed engrossed in entertaining Lily with descriptions of the military ration packs stored in the cupboards, but Ashe could see him watching her, listening between his comments for her response.

“Airport.”

Spider nodded in understanding. “The terrorist attack.”

“What?”

“On the airport,” she elaborated and then twitched her head back toward the rest of the building. “One of the old offices still has a television.”

Ashe hesitated. “What else did you hear?”

Spider shrugged, watching Bus insist Lily choose from the meal packets hidden behind his back. “The usual. The reporters say terrorists, but admit it might not have been. They don’t know and it’s under investigation, which means that by the time the police find anything –
if
they find anything – no one in the media will care enough to report much on it anymore.” She grinned. “What else is new?”

Wiping the last of the blood from her arm, Ashe paused. It wouldn’t have changed anything to know the cops had found the others’ bodies. No one would be safer, or any less dead. She didn’t know why it felt like it would have helped.

Though maybe it would have felt a little bit less like she’d just left them behind.

The sound of the cabinet closing pulled her from her thoughts. Studying the selection of meals in her arms, Lily trailed Bus from the kitchen, with Cole rolling one shoulder off the doorframe to follow as they passed. Spider jumped down from the counter and headed for the main room.

Ashe hesitated and then left the stained rag hanging on a pipe to dry before starting after them.

With a flourish that left Lily grinning, Bus sat the little girl down at one of the few surviving tables, and then proceeded to demonstrate how to heat the ration as though performing a conjuring trick. Joining her at the table, Ashe watched Lily laugh as he pretended to burn himself and then confronted the offending meal like it had injured him on purpose.

Her gaze caught on Cole. Seated a few feet away, he was studying Bus and Lily as if they were a puzzle to which he’d just discovered someone had stolen a piece. From time to time, his eyes would flick toward Spider, though only when he thought the girl wouldn’t notice.

Pulling her meal closer, Ashe glanced to the wrapper to determine what she’d been given, and then slid her gaze to Spider. Perched on the edge of another table, her feet propped on either side of a broken-seated chair with her shotgun lying nearby, the girl gave every sign of being focused on the tray in her hands. And then her gaze twitched up just long enough to meet Ashe’s eyes.

Ashe exhaled, going back to her food. Cole had no idea how observant the people around him could be.

As though proving her thought, Bus lowered himself onto a chair with a sigh and then glanced to the young man. “So how do you fit into all this, Cole?” he asked as he picked up a plastic fork.

Cole froze. Across the table, all the nascent relaxation in Lily’s face transformed instantly to panic.

“Well…” he started. His eyes darted to Ashe. “I was just in the–”

“He saved us,” Ashe interrupted flatly, watching Lily. “Back on the farm and then at the airport today.”

The little girl’s panic crumbled into relief when nothing else followed the words. Cole stared, as though uncertain why she’d done that, or if he’d trust any explanation he’d receive anyway.

She returned to her food, noting distantly that the grayish-brown substance tasted mildly better than it looked. From the corner of her eye, she could see Spider and Bus glance to each other before the old man spoke again. “Ah,” he said neutrally. “Thought I remembered Ashe mentioning your name before.”

Plastic forks clicked as they kept eating.

“How’d you meet Ashley?” Lily asked Bus.

Ashe glanced up. Eyebrow rising, Bus looked askance at the little girl, a smile pulling on his mouth. “What? Your big sister never tell you about us?”

Uncomfortably, Ashe looked back at her dinner as Lily shook her head.

Bus chuckled. “Saved that girl’s life, we did. Or Carter and Samson anyway. Ashe here’d stumbled into a trap we set for a feral back in Utah. Guy would’ve killed her if they hadn’t stopped him first. Tiny little ghost of a thing when Carter found her, wasn’t she, Spider? Running for her life and looking like the hounds of hell were on her tail.” He glanced over at Ashe. “Of course, that was then.”

She hesitated, reading between the lines. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I just–”

“Eh,” he interrupted kindly. “I forgive you, kiddo.”

Watching him for a moment, she managed a smile.

“You didn’t tell me you were their queen,” Spider commented, her quiet words at odds with the hint of accusation beneath her tone.

Ashe glanced over. “Would you believe I didn’t know?”

The girl paused as though weighing a response.

Ashe dropped her gaze to the table. “I found out from Carter, right before he died. I didn’t say anything because…” She shook her head. “I thought maybe I’d misheard or something. It sounded crazy.”

Consternation flickered over Spider’s face. “But how did
he
suddenly know? Or had he known all along? That night at Twitch’s, he just…”

“It was his cousin,” Ashe said into the pause. “Cornelius. Carter met him downstairs that night, and I followed.” A wry expression crossed her face. “The rats had been keeping me awake. But I overheard them talking. Cornelius was looking for me… us.” Her brow drew down at the memory, and the old question of how things might have gone. “Carter didn’t tell him I was there.”

“Was this Cornelius one of the…” Spider asked, gesturing vaguely to fill in the venomous description she’d probably have used if Lily wasn’t around.

“No, he was a good one.” Ashe paused. “The Blood killed him today.”

Silence fell over the table.

“I’m sorry,” Spider said.

Ashe nodded.

A moment slid by.

“So where’d you go?” Spider asked.

Ashe took a breath. “Croftsburg.”

“Nice?”

“Not really.”

The corner of Spider’s mouth twitched and, in spite of everything, Ashe felt herself mirroring the expression. Shaking her head, she looked down.

A second passed and her smile faded, memories driving it away.

“What happened?” she asked. “After… after I left?”

Spider looked to Bus.

“That’s not really important,” the old man said, his tone making it clear a change of subject was probably in order.

“Why didn’t you go?” she pressed.

Bus looked back at the other girl.

“Sam said not to,” Spider answered.

Ashe paused, hit by the incongruity of feeling grateful to the man who’d tried to shoot her a few minutes before. “And so you just…”

Spider exhaled, her gaze on her food.

“Samson…” Bus began, and then sighed, revising whatever he’d been about to say. “Losing Carter hit him hard, in no small measure because he wasn’t there. Blames himself, I think, for what happened.”

“And me,” Ashe added quietly.

Bus paused and then tilted his head in acknowledgement. “Even if he shouldn’t. Carter knew what going after the Blood meant; we all did. And as for the wizard stuff…”

Face tightening, Spider looked away.

“You had your reasons for not saying anything,” Bus told Ashe, and then he glanced to the other girl. “You both did. And you thought there’d be more time.”

Spider didn’t respond.

Bus watched her a moment longer and then went back to his dinner. “Regardless,” he continued, dropping the topic, “the boy’s been driving himself to fill Carter’s shoes ever since. I mean, in our own ways, we’re all trying to maintain what Carter left behind. But for Samson, a part of that was a hardcore distrust for anything wizard, including anything that involved you. So when the word came that you were looking for help fighting the Blood…”

“He thought it was the same thing all over again,” Ashe said, only partially asking.

Bus shrugged equitably.

“But you guys…” she continued.

He drew a breath and then let it out slowly. “She argued till I thought she’d shoot him,” he said with a nod to Spider. “And I–”

“Offered to?” Spider commented, her eyes on the slats covering the large window nearby.

Bus eyed her wryly. “I told you that was going to be your job.”

The girl smiled, but her heart didn’t seem to be in it.

“We were trying to stick together,” Bus continued to Ashe. “After everything, we weren’t quite in the position to be running back off again. I’d gotten pretty banged up getting out of Twitch’s place, and the dogs weren’t in too great of shape either. Add to that just losing Carter and Samson still being on crutches half the time and,” he shrugged, “we waited. And just when I started getting back to my usual athletic self…”

“You heard what was really happening,” Ashe filled in when he paused.

“Yeah.”

She nudged the last few bites of food with her fork, her appetite long since gone. “And the others?” she asked, bracing herself.

Silence answered her and she glanced up.

“Bus. The others.”

The old man looked away. “Jericho agreed with Samson, and because of him, Magnolia and their girls stayed put. But,” he grimaced, “Belle and some of the rest…”

She dropped her gaze to the table, trying not to show any reaction as he trailed off, leaving little question of what had happened to the cook and everyone else. And she’d known anyway. She should have just let it go, because she’d damn well known. Spider and Bus were a miracle; Magnolia and the kids even more so.

But not everyone would have stayed away.

She swallowed awkwardly, working to keep her expression calm despite the fact her heart seemed to be pulsing so much harder than it should have been. “You’re sure?” she asked, blinking as she looked up at Bus.

He nodded.

She looked back down.

“It wasn’t your fault, Ashe,” he said.

She made a noise to let him know she understood.

“Ashe,” he repeated.

She glanced up.

“It wasn’t your fault.”

Her gaze went back to the table. It hurt, somehow. Their forgiveness. Their trust. So many people were dead, destroyed by ferals who never would have touched them if not for her. And Bus and Spider forgave her. Welcomed her back. They treated her like family, returning after a few months away.

Instead of Bloody Queen Ashe of Merlin, the monster who’d nearly gotten every cripple in a thousand miles killed.

She could feel shivers running through her, though she didn’t know why. “You guys have so much faith I wasn’t behind it,” she said, the words feeling as though they belonged to someone else. “But you just knew me a month. I never even told you I was a wizard. And the Merlin, they–”

“You saved my life,” Spider said quietly.

A laugh came out of nowhere, the sound harsh and teetering just this side of controlled. “And?” she retorted. “And
what
? So I stopped
one
feral. It could’ve been a trick. Hell, Spider, I could have been saving you for myself! And then Carter died. And Belle and all your friends, right after I just trotted off to the damn–”

“Hey!” Bus snapped.

Her breathing ragged, she fell silent, staring at him. Across the table, Lily watched her with wide eyes.

“We trust you because Carter trusted you,” Bus continued. “And because we’re not stupid. Yeah, we knew you a month. Day in, day out for a month, while you lived at the Abbey and could’ve killed us all in a single night. You’re a
wizard
, girl. You think we don’t know what that means? You think we haven’t gotten
damn
good at reading people, doing what we do?” He paused, and when he spoke again, the edge on his tone was gone. “You didn’t have it in you to be a feral, Ashe. You still don’t. And you didn’t kill our friends. Or yours. A bunch of wizard bastards who were already ferals anyway did.”

Still shaking, she looked back down.

“Let it go, kid,” Bus told her gently. “Guilt over the dead won’t do anything but hurt your ability to protect the living.”

Her jaw tightened and she nodded, more for his sake than any belief she could actually accomplish what he said.

A moment went by. Softly, plastic scraped across the tabletop.

She glanced up.

With a hesitant smile, Lily nudged the wrapped cookie closer. “It’s oatmeal raisin,” she said quietly. “Your favorite.”

For a heartbeat, she stared at the girl, dumbstruck in the face of the silly, simple gesture. Her hand trembling, she reached out and pulled the cookie to her.

“Thanks,” she whispered.

Lily’s expression didn’t change.

Ashe’s gaze fell away. Closing her eyes briefly, she drew a breath and then opened the wrapping.

“So…” she tried, her eyes locked on the nearly stale cookie. “This place.”

There was a question somewhere in the words, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to find it. The others didn’t seem to care, though, and from the corner of her eye, she could see Spider shift slightly on the adjacent table.