Mid Life Love (29 page)

“Are you going
to promote every man that flirts with me?”

“No. I’ll fire
whoever does it next.”

She looked like
she was about to go into one of her “I just don’t understand you tirades” but
then her face softened and she burst into laughter. 

I picked up a
floating loofah and brushed it against her neck. “Is my birthday dinner tonight
non-negotiable, even though I don’t want to go?”

“Yes.”

“Fine.” I sighed.
“Should I assume that you used your credit card to hold the reservation?”

“Who else’s
would I use?”

“You could’ve
asked for mine. I trust you...And I trust that you know better than to actually
pay
for dinner.”

“It’s your
birthday, Jonathan. That’s what happens when you—”

“You
never
have to pay for anything.” I kissed her shoulder. “Ever.”

––––––––

I
made sure that
tonight’s dinner at Sierra Mar would be placed on my card before we walked
inside. The restaurant was nestled high into a barrage of cliffs that overlooked
the Pacific Ocean; its panoramic windows revealed the entire shoreline of the
California coast. 

The waitress led
us past a full room of white clothed tables and into a private room that
appeared to sit amongst the clouds.

My eyes
immediately veered towards a table with two sparkling gifts, towards the woman
that was sitting beside them.

Hayley?! It
couldn’t be...

My sister hardly
ever came to San Francisco, even when I begged her to. I always had to meet her
in Memphis, or in some other city on the East Coast. She claimed she couldn’t
stand “the air” on the West Coast and vowed to never come until she started to
work for me.

I stopped
walking and looked at Claire. My voice was a whisper. “You got Hayley to come
here?”

“Is that not
okay? I’m sorry if I overstep—”

“It’s more than
okay...” I was utterly shocked. Not much in life surprised me.

“John!” Hayley
jumped up as soon as her eyes met mine. “Happy Birthday!”

“Thank you.” I
hugged her. “I thought you weren’t coming here until the fall.”

She looked over
at Claire and laughed. “I wasn’t! Have a seat, have a seat. I already ordered
for the two of you since you’re
thirty minutes
late. Traffic?”

No, sex...
“Yeah...”

She shrugged.
“Oh well. Claire, it’s great to finally put a face to the name. How was your—”

I zoned out. I
couldn’t believe Claire had managed to get my sister to come to town. I still
couldn’t believe that she’d decorated my office earlier or set up a surprise
dinner. No one had ever done anything like that for me, and I was trying to
determine if it was real or not. 

I heard my
sister asking me questions as the dinner courses were served, but all I could
do was look at Claire and smile as she threw her sexy green gaze back at me. I
thought about how much she’d pushed me away in the beginning, how she still had
parts of herself that were closed off—completely off limits. I was getting
close to her now and she knew it, but she wasn’t pushing me away as much, she
was pulling herself closer. 

“Are you going
to blow out the candles or are you going to wait until your cake catches fire?”
Hayley shook my shoulder. “Hello!”

“What?” I
snapped out of my thoughts and noticed the three layer cupcake sitting in front
of me. There was a “To Jonathan, From Claire” message signed in whipped
chocolate on the side of its plate.

Smiling, I blew
out the sparklers and looked over at Claire again. “I didn’t know they served
cupcakes here...”

“They don’t,”
she said. “But when you tell them your date is
Jonathan Statham
they’ll
make whatever you want.”

“Is that so?”

She smiled.
“Would you two please excuse me for a minute? I need to take this call.”

“Of course.” I
stood up and helped her out of the chair, giving her a quick kiss before she
walked away. 

“Since when do
you celebrate your birthday?” Hayley crossed her arms once Claire was out of
earshot. “Do I need to buy you a gift too?”

“No.” I laughed.
“She made me do this. What made you come during the semester?”

“Your girlfriend
is pretty damn persuasive. She made me fly in yesterday. Is she a lawyer or
something?”

“No, she works
with me at the company...You talk to dad lately?”

“Unfortunately...He
got sent to solitary confinement again last week—contraband. It’s going to be a
rough six years for him. You talk to mom?”

“New job.
Eastern sea-docks. Five months post-rehab. Decent therapy sessions.”

“Noted...Maybe the
thirteenth time
really is the charm.”

I picked up my
wine glass. “We’ll see.”

“You must
really
like Claire, huh?”

“What makes you
say that?”

“Well for one,
you two can’t take your eyes off one another for more than five seconds. It’s
actually quite nauseating. You also haven’t called to check on me in
three weeks. Considering that you usually call me every other day...”

“I have checked
on you. I texted—”

“No,
Greg
texted me.” She laughed. “It’s okay. It’s nice not having to report to my
over-protective big brother for a change. “

“Don’t get used
to it.”

“Trust me, I
won’t.” She looked at her watch. “I’m gonna go now. Bring Claire to Memphis
this summer okay? My Scrabble tournament is going to be the last week of August.
There’s always a blues festival going on if you want to come some other time.”

“You’re
leaving
? Right now? You just got here!”

“Yeah...You
clearly weren’t paying attention to anything I said over dinner were you?” She
shook her head. “I kept asking you two questions and you just kept staring at
each other and smiling. You think I want to stick around for another second of
that shit?”

“I am so sorr—”

“It’s okay. Greg
is outside waiting to take me to the airport because my brother is too in love
to pay me any attention right now.”

I rolled my eyes
and helped her out of her chair. “Have a safe flight. Thank you so much for
coming.”

“I will. I love
you.”

“Love you too.”
I gave her a hug and watched as she left the room.

I realized
Claire had been gone for quite a while and stood up. I started walking towards
the restrooms, but I saw her walking my way.

“Where’s
Hayley?” she asked.

“She was sick of
us staring at each other apparently. Are you okay?”

“Yeah...It’s
just...Ashley and Caroline are driving me crazy about their shared car again...They
called me on three-way to ask about letting one of them drive my car tonight.”

“You said no?”

“Of course I
said no. They need to
stick together
and share what they have.”

“Okay... Are you
ready to go?”

“After you open
your presents. Let’s do that first and then—”

“I want to open
them at home.”

––––––––

I
set the two
presents—one sparkling red rectangular box, and one fat silver box—in front of
the fireplace, waiting for Claire to sit next to me.

“Which one
should I open first?” I asked.

“The silver
one...”

“Okay.” I took
my time un-wrapping it, unfolding every corner and gently pulling away each
strip of tape. I placed each torn sheet in a neat stack and stuck all the tape
pieces together.

“Why is it
taking you so long?” She laughed. “Do you need
help
un-wrapping it?
You’re acting like you’ve never received a birthday present before.”

“I haven’t.”

Her eyes widened
and her face paled. “I’m sorry...I was just joking. I didn’t—”

I pulled her
close. “You didn’t know. It’s okay.” I peeled the last bit of paper off and
flipped over the box. I took the lid off and sucked in a breath once I saw what
it was.

“I wasn’t sure
what to get you since you seem to have everything already,” she said as she
pulled the golden sea hooks out of the box. “Since you love yachts so much I
figured I’d get you these...They say that sea hooks are—”

I knew exactly
what sea hooks meant, exactly what they stood for. To someone who didn’t know
yachts, they were simply huge golden metal hooks in the shape of an anchor, but
I knew better. Every man who owned a yacht had a set of loose sea hooks, and
whenever he was seeing someone he loved, someone he couldn’t live without, he
was supposed to personalize them and weld them onto the ship’s real anchor.
They were a symbol of longevity, a way of saying “I want to be with you.”

I looked over
them and noticed that she’d already personalized them: Her name was etched
alongside the edges in cursive and my name was etched at the bottom.

I didn’t know
what to say so I simply opened the other present—much faster this time.

I laughed once I
tore the last sheet of paper off. “I didn’t know they made a
Harry Potter
version of Monopoly...”

“They don’t...”
She took the box from my hands. “I did some pretty intense work for Parker
Brothers years ago and they owed me one, so I asked them to make a one of kind
game just for you. I know that neither of these gifts is a new car or a–”

I leaned forward
and pressed my lips against hers, wrapping my arms around her tightly, not
wanting to let her go. I pulled her down to the carpet and ran my hands across
her hips, still exploring her mouth with my tongue—saying everything with
kisses that I couldn’t say with words.

“Thank you very
much,” I whispered once I had to take a breath. “Everything you did today means
a lot to me...”

I’d never had a
birthday party, birthday gifts, anything. My real parents never gave a shit
about birthdays and my foster parents only gave me one present per year—on
Christmas
,
and it was usually a used electronic device or a book. After growing up so long
without a birthday, I never saw a point in celebrating.

I slowly let her
go and reached into my back pocket. “I bought something for you too.” I handed
her a small jewelry box.

“This isn’t an
engagement ring is it?” She paled. “I can’t accept or agree to—”

“
What
?” I
sat up and laughed. “No. I think I know you much better than that. Open it.”

“Can it wait
until tomorrow? It’s
your
birthday and I don’t want to—”

“Open. The.
Box.”

“But—”

“
Now
.”

She let out an
exasperated sigh. “I really don’t want to...”

C
laire

“Open the damn
box, Claire.” His voice was stern. “I don’t feel like threatening you on my
birthday.”

“You’re
acknowledging that it’s your birthday now?”

“Five seconds.”

“No.”

“
No
?” He raised
his eyebrow.

“Are you a
parrot
?” I tossed the box back to him. “You heard me.”

He narrowed his
eyes and reached out to grab me, but I jumped up and stepped backwards. He
jumped up with ease and smiled his wicked grin. “You always have to do things the
hard way, don’t you?” He lunged towards me, but I slipped away.

I ran out of the
room with him on my heels, dashing down the grand staircase. I rushed through
the double corridors, past the parlor, and into the kitchen—hoping to hide in
the two-roomed pantry. Before I could slip inside, I felt myself being lifted
into the air and tossed over his shoulder.

“Next time I
won’t give you a head start.” He playfully smacked my ass. He carried me
outside to the pool deck and set me down on a plush lounge chair. He reached
into his pocket and handed me the ring box again. “Now.”

I sighed. I
flipped the box open and saw a folded sheet of paper sitting in the ring slot.
“A note?”

“Read it.”

I unfolded it
and cleared my throat. “Dear Ms. Gracen, on behalf of Vintage Consolidated Loan
Company, we are writing to inform you that the balance on your outstanding
mortgage and student loan accounts is officially zero. We are enclosing the
history of payments that were recently...” I stopped reading aloud and read the
rest to myself.

I felt tears
forming at the corners of my eyes. “You paid off my
house
? And my
student loans?” I felt like I needed to say it out loud to confirm it.

“I should’ve
done it sooner,” he said softly. 

“I—” I was
speechless. “Thank you so much...I don’t even know what to—I can’t believe you—”

“Now you don’t
need
to work overtime and you can spend all your extra time with
me
. This
was more so a gift for me than you.” He smiled. “Wasn’t that way better than a
proposal
?”

I laughed and
let a few tears fall. “Thank you so much...”

“You’re more
than welcome, but the next time I give you a gift and you even
think
about
not opening it when I tell you to—”

I pressed my
lips against his and bit down on his tongue. “If you’ve fulfilled your
‘I-must-make-Claire-do-whatever-I-say’ quota for the day, I would like to end
your birthday properly. And by
properly
, I mean fucking you against this
chair until you can’t walk...”

––––––––

I
slid a pair of
shades over my eyes and lay back on a fluffy yellow blanket. I held my e-reader
in front of my face and continued to read through one of my favorite books—
Fahrenheit
451
.

When I’d woken
up this morning—exhausted from everything Jonathan and I had done last night,
he’d suggested that we have a breakfast picnic at the park. I thought we were
going to cook the food ourselves and bring it along, but we drove to the park.

Shortly after we
arrived, trays of Belgian waffles, organic strawberries, bacon, eggs, and toast
were delivered from an exclusive restaurant.

“Are you
planning on reading all day?” He kissed my cheek.

“Will that be a
problem?”

“Not until
tonight.” He lay down next to me and took the e-reader from my hands. “You
haven’t said much to me all morning. Are you okay?”

Why is he so
good at noticing stuff like that?
“I’m fine.”

He rolled on top
of me and looked into my eyes. “The truth...”

I wish I could
tell you...
“Nothing’s
wrong...I’ve just been thinking lately and I—Okay...I honestly like you
a lot
,
and I know you said that I shouldn’t worry about...” I sighed. “Can I ask you
something?”

“Whatever you
want.”

“Why did you
want to go on a date with me so badly after we’d already had sex?”

He arched his
brow. “What do you mean?”

“You kept asking
me to go out every day and I kept turning you down...I would think that a man
would rather accept ‘no-strings-attached’ sex rather than trying to pursue—”

“I liked you the
first day I saw you. I thought you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever
seen...And there was—and
still is
, something about you that I couldn’t
get over. When you turned me down at the grocery store
and
at work—not
to mention standing me up after I thought you’d said yes, I decided I wouldn’t
take no for an answer. The sex was
exceptional
, but I wanted to get to
know you better.”

“But you
could’ve gotten
anyone
.”

“I wanted
you
.”
He kissed my lips.

“Why? You barely
knew me back then. You—”

“Do you slip
into these insecure ruts often?”

Is once or twice
a week often?
“Why?”

“Because if you
do, I’m clearly not doing my job, and I need to do more to make you understand
how much I care about you, how I’m willing to do anything to make you happy.”

My heart
fluttered. “No, it’s not—I’m not doubting that you care. I just want to be
fully prepared for when you finally wake up and realize that you and I aren’t—”

“
Stop it
.”
He cupped my face in his hands. He pressed his forehead against mine and
whispered. “I’m not going anywhere. Ever. As a matter of fact, you’ll leave me
before I leave you.”

“Jona—”

“I’m sorry that
you’ve been feeling this way so often. I’ll do better.” He kissed me and ran
his fingers through my hair. “Did you have any plans for today?”

“No...I cleared my
whole weekend for your birthday.”

He smiled. “In
that case, I want to take you somewhere.” He rolled off of me and pulled me to
my feet. “Come on.”

––––––––

I
was sitting in
the backseat of the town car wearing a black blindfold over my eyes. I couldn’t
see anything but darkness, and every time I attempted to take a peek, Jonathan
playfully tapped my hand.

We’d been riding
along for at least an hour and I was getting anxious, excited. I knew wherever
he was taking me was going to be amazing.

“Mr. Statham, is
this close enough?” Greg asked as the car slowed down.

“This is
perfect. Thank you.” He made sure the blindfold was still tight and helped me
out of the car. He grabbed my hand and we took several steps into the harsh
blowing winds.

“We’re here...” he
said. “Well, almost. We still have another two hours to go before we get
there.”

“Another two
hours? Why did we get out of the car?”

He laughed and
lifted me up onto what felt like a short stack of steps. Then I felt him
holding both of my hands.

“Are you ready?”
he asked.

I nodded
excitedly and he slowly moved the blindfold away from my eyes.

My heart dropped
as soon as I saw what the “surprise” was. I tried to keep myself calm but it
was no use.

His large
private plane was standing a couple hundred feet away: It was a white Citation
Sovereign jet—seating capacity for nine, three thousand miles of nonstop
mileage, and easily worth eighteen million.

I knew that
because my girls had built that particular model over and over, because they’d
gushed about how it was the top of the line in executive flight travel.

I saw the pilot
descending from the cabin—waving at us, and I suddenly lost the ability to
breathe. I clutched the flag charms on my necklace and my knees buckled
underneath me.

“
Claire
?”
Jonathan helped me back up. “Claire, what’s wrong? Why are you shaking?” He
squeezed my hand, but I snatched it away and shut my eyes.

I tried to think
about something happy, something positive, but pictures started to flash
through my mind, making me remember all the things I wish I could forget: The
newspaper stories, the endless media coverage, the crash site photos. My twin
sister’s face.

My heart was
pounding fast and loud that I could hear it over Jonathan asking what the hell
was going on and calling out for help.

I tried to
convince myself that this was just another nightmare, another dream that I
would wake up from in any second. But as I gasped for air, as I tried to head
back down the steps and back into the town car, I felt my body hitting the
concrete and everything went black.

––––––––

I
blinked my
eyes open and realized I was lying in bed at home. The clock on my wall read
two o’ clock and my windows were unlatched and open, letting in a warm spring
breeze.

I turned my head
to the right and saw Jonathan eyeing me curiously, holding an ice pack against
my shoulder. I tried to give him an assured smile, but every muscle in my body
felt weak.

“What happened?”
I croaked.

“You had a panic
attack.” He set the ice pack down and caressed my cheek. “You fainted and fell
off the platform.”

“Oh...”I tried to
roll over so I wouldn’t have to see the worry in his eyes, but I couldn’t feel
my left foot. I looked down and saw that it was sitting on a stack of pillows,
resting underneath two bags of ice.

“You sprained
your ankle...You’ll need to take those every four hours.” He pointed towards
the medicine on my nightstand and moved closer. “You’re scared of planes?”

I shook my head
and felt tears welling in my eyes.

He slipped his
hand behind my pillows and helped me to sit up. “Talk to me, Claire...”

“I’m beyond
scared—I’m
terrified
...so terrified that I’m scared to pick up my own
daughters from the airport...”

“Why?”

I sighed. I
reached around my neck and felt for the two flag charms, making sure they were
right where they were supposed to be.

“Have I ever
told you that identical twins run in my family? It’s the strangest thing—almost
every woman in my family has a set of twins... I cried the first three months
after Ashley and Caroline were born because I finally knew what it felt like to
be a mother, and I couldn’t fathom how my mother felt when she lost my sister.”

He held my hand
and stroked my knuckles with his fingertips.

“We were only
eighteen...We’d been inseparable our whole lives...Everywhere I went, she went. No
questions asked, and we liked it that way...We were even going to the same
college. I was going to pursue acting and she was going to pursue art. She was
naturally good at drawing and designing things...”

“We were
supposed to be on the same flight. Pittsburgh to North Carolina...We were going
to do an early summer scope out of the school so we could check out the dorms
before we sent in our living requests...”

Her face flashed
before my eyes and I didn’t try to wipe my tears away. I kept telling the
story, remembering every second like it was yesterday: “We were both sitting at
the gate and the agent came over the intercom and said, ‘We need a few people
to give up their seats and catch the later flight.’ Neither of us moved because
we thought that people in coach didn’t have a choice. But the agent kept saying
over and over, ‘We need a few more willing passengers. We’ll give you a free
flight. We’ll give you a first class upgrade.’ So, I turned to her and I said,
‘Let’s ask if we can switch flights. We can even get them to let us use their
phone and call mom to tell her we’re going to be arriving later.’ She said,
‘No. You’re always telling me what to do, Claire. I’m staying on
this
flight.
Deal with it.’ We’d been...” I paused.

“We’d been
arguing all day. I swore she’d stolen my favorite purple purse, she swore that
she hadn’t. I was frustrated and annoyed, so I told her I didn’t want to sit
with her, that I hoped she got lost whenever her plane landed. I got up and
changed my ticket, the gate agent thanked me, and that was that... She and I
shared a bag of popcorn before it was time for her to go...And then I told her
goodbye...”

I cleared my
throat and sniffled. “It was like an hour later when I was on my plane that
they were ordering us all to get off...No one had cell phones back then, so I
didn’t know what was going on. I just thought we were switching planes or that
our flight had been delayed...”

“When I finally
got a chance to use the payphone, I called my mom and she was screaming. She
was saying ‘Thank god you’re alive! Thank god you weren’t on that plane!’ I
asked her what she was talking about and she said that the plane we were
scheduled to be on crashed into a small town thirty minutes into the flight...And
that the emergency responders were already reporting that there were....” My
voice cracked. “That there were no survivors...”

“She said, ‘I’m
so happy! I thought I’d lost the two of you! Let me speak to your sister...”
Heavier tears fell down my face and my throat became dry. “I had to tell her
that we didn’t stick together like she’d told us too...That I didn’t make her
change her flight like I should have and...”

He pulled me
close and wiped my tears away with his shirt. “I’m so sorry...”

“It was six
months before I could walk into our bedroom...” I tugged at my necklace again. “I
went through all of her stuff, hugging everything she owned...And then I found
this pretty white box under her bed with my name and the words ‘You pick first’
on it. Inside were two charm bracelets she’d made with one flag charm each. One
was red and one was white...And they um...When you put them together they read
‘Always Together, Sisters Forever’ on the back...I thought ten or twenty years
would be enough time but there are still triggers here or there and...I’ll never
get over it...”