Midnight in Brussels (19 page)

“I can understand that you’re young and you want to sow your wild oats and do all you want to do before getting married and settling down again. Yes, I can understand that. But then, I want to be there with you while you do all that. I’ve already done everything I want to do, now all I want is to be with you. But, I can wait. I promise I’ll wait for you, my darling. Oh, I almost forgot. How could I?” He laughed as he reached into his inside jacket pocket. He pulled out her engagement ring, loose in his hand. “I know you want me hang on to this, but will you wear it at least while you’re here? Please?” He slipped it on her finger.

Chapter 36

Amanda was eager to return to Bruges. While in the States, she spent as much time as she could with Richard without taking precious moments away from Paula and the baby. She knew it was going to be hard to leave them again, but she was determined to get back and work night and day to meet the deadline she and Rachel had set. For the first time in her life she felt in control, felt her life had meaning, felt worthy.

The day came to leave and this time Richard took her to the airport to bid her farewell. He had slipped an envelope of money and a note in her shoulder bag without her knowing. She would never ask for help, he knew that, and although her friend Rachel had come to the rescue, this way he felt he could still be as important in her life, too.

“Please call me if you need anything, anything at all, Amanda. You must believe that I love you and want you to be happy. You do, don’t you?” He was holding on to her, not wanting to let go as she was about to board the plane.

“Yes, I believe, you, Richard. And I hope you understand that I have to do what I’m doing.”

“I know you do, darling. You just take care and don’t forget me. I’ll be there for the opening of your shop, you can count on that. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

He felt as if his heart was being yanked from his chest and Amanda was slipping through his fingers. He could do nothing about it.

They kissed one more time.

Amanda pulled away gently. “Bye, Richard. I’ll call you when I get there.” She began walking away.

He stood watching her till she was out of sight, his heart aching.

Amanda was borderline teary for the first hour of the flight. She wondered if she was doing the right thing. Maybe it would be better if she stayed and married Richard. She could have a shop in Cupertino. She could make lace and design clothing there. Why did she have to do it in Belgium? Why?

She leaned against the window and closed her eyes. The strain of the past few days had finally taken its toll and she felt worn out. She fell sleep.

Antoine met her at the airport in Brussels, which was a surprise. She’d given him her arrival time and flight number, but she didn’t think he would be there. She thought he would be working that morning. Nevertheless, she was happy to see him. She didn’t feel a sexual attraction to him anymore; but he was a good friend, more like a brother to her. She valued his friendship and loved his girls.

Antoine pulled onto the main road to Bruges. He glanced at Amanda and grinned. “I’ve got some news for you, Mandy. I’m thinking about going back to university to become a history professor.” His eyes were bright and excited.

“I didn’t know you wanted to be a teacher? When did you decide this?”

“Before I married and had children, I was in university when my father died and I had to stop and go to work fulltime to help my mother. Then of course, I met Nadia and had the children. But now, I believe I can do it again, if I stay focused. There is an assistance program here at the university in Brussels, and they provide work, too. All I have to do is move to Brussels and enroll in the program.”

“Your mother will come with you to take care of the girls?”

“Yes, of course. We’ve been looking for a place already.”

Amanda reached over and hugged him. “This is good news.”

“I’ve already given notice at the restaurant and to the landlord. I’ll miss you, Mandy.” His smile was gone as he glanced at her and then back to the street before him. “But I hope you will visit us, and we can take the girls on outings. They love you, Mandy.”

He wished it was different. He fell for Amanda the first day they met, but he was wise enough to know from past experience he couldn’t make someone love him. He had to get on with his life, same as she. When he realized she didn’t feel as he did, he made his decision. He admired her and her strength and tenacity. Now he wanted to go for what he wanted most, and that was to finish school and become a history professor. He had his girls to think of and his own career. He didn’t want to be a waiter for the rest of his life.

“I believe you’re doing the right thing, Antoine. For you and for the girls.” Amanda heard the words that tumbled from her mouth. She wondered at what point she had gained such sureness and wisdom. It wasn’t so very long ago when her self-confidence had been non-existent, when she had felt as if she was worthless … couldn’t do or say anything right, was shy and afraid of people, afraid of everything.

They rounded the corner to their street and Antoine pulled up in front of the stone apartment building. Workers were on scaffolding all the way up to the fourth floor.

“What are they doing?”

“The owner is renovating. New everything … plumbing, electrical wiring, painting. I’m probably getting out just in time before he raises the rent.”

They both laughed as they opened their car doors. Antoine carried Amanda’s luggage to the entrance.

“I can take it from here; you go ahead and park the car. And thank you so much, Antoine. Let’s talk later after I unpack and get settled. I want to hear all about your plans.”

Chapter 37

Winter was upon them and the cold weather had arrived in Bruges. Although it wasn’t freezing, most days wouldn’t get below 40° and November wasn’t as cold as it would get, Amanda was already feeling the chill. She was told that the most rain fell in November. It was the wettest month of the year. Then the snow would come after that – December and January. January was the coldest.

Weather was never an issue with Amanda. She loved it in Bruges no matter what the weather produced. She was indoors most of the time anyway, making lace and attaching it to fabric. She’d bought top-of-the-line sewing machines and other equipment with the money Richard had slipped in her bag, and had quite a modern setup in her sewing room at the flat. She’d never been happier.

Antoine had already moved to Brussels and she’d already taken the train one Sunday to spend time with the girls and him.

She was stressed and pressed to have enough ready to open her shop in December. She and Rachel had decided it would be best if they rented a shop in Brussels and could open for business before Christmas, taking advantage of the holiday season. That is if they could get the licenses and all that was necessary to open on such short notice.

So Amanda found an existing shop that the designer was vacating on a busy lane leading to the Grand Place. The designer would sublet to Amanda till her lease was up, giving Amanda enough time to get the appropriate licenses after the first of the year. Amanda would sell on the existing designer’s permit and would give her a cut. The shop would be empty the first week of December, so there wasn’t much time left.

Rachel planned to be there a few days before, would rent a car and an apartment so they could move all the clothing from Bruges to Brussels. Antoine was going to help move the clothing.

The apartment over the shop wasn’t available, so Rachel had made a few phone calls and found one further down over another. Neither one of them had seen it, but they decided it didn’t matter. It would suffice till they found something else, if Amanda wasn’t happy with it.

Richard was all set to be at the opening, as well as Drake and Paula and A.G. They all were coming.

Amanda went through a myriad of feelings; she was thrilled, but frightened, nervous, irritable, and worried. Could she do it? Could she be ready in time? What if her clothing didn’t sell? What if no one liked what she created? What if she failed?

From morning till night she made jackets, skirts, blouses, dresses, pants, aprons, handkerchiefs, and scarves. Even a few kimonos like the ones she’d seen in other shops.

The store was tiny, fifteen-by-fifteen, so she was thankful for that. It wouldn’t take much to make it look full. She’d found two standing full-length mirrors, gilded antiques, and the two dressing rooms would be created by hanging curtains across the back corners of the room. The mirrors would stand outside the dressing rooms against the walls. Rachel was shipping framed antique prints of lace makers at work to adorn the walls above the racks of clothing. She’d found them on the Internet.

Amanda got up from her chair and stretched. She’d been making lace for four hours straight. It was time to take a walk and get a bite to eat. She missed Antoine being at the Craenenburg. It just wasn’t the same without him, but that was the nearest café and she was starving. She didn’t want to cook for herself.

She grabbed her purse and left the apartment and headed for the Markt.

Two hours later Amanda was still sitting at her regular table when she heard loud sirens. People were running outside and looking down the lane that ran alongside the Craenenburg. That was her street. She paid her tab and went outside to see what was happening.

As she rounded the corner of the Craenenburg, she was horrified to see trucks and ladders in front of her apartment building which was engulfed in smoke and flames.

“No! Oh God, no!” She ran down the lane but was stopped by the police who had set up a barricade preventing anyone from getting too close.

She screamed, “I have to get in there, please! I have to get everything out! Let me go! Don’t you understand? It’s all I have in the world!”

The policeman held her back. “You cannot go, Miss. The building is full of fire. There is nothing you can do. I am sorry, the building is destroyed.”

PART FOUR

“Time removes pain and disappointment while you receive a renewed spirit and abundant blessings from the universe. Ask, believe, and it is yours.”

 
  
                                                       
Rebecca Buckley

Chapter 38

It was foggy at the Bakersfield airport. Amanda’s heart flipped as she stepped from the airplane and saw Richard with Paula, Drake and A.G., waving and calling to her. Tears came to her eyes and she couldn’t imagine ever leaving them again.