Mind Over Psyche (17 page)

“Look,” Joshua said, matching his response to Deryl's visual-tactile way of thinking, “I know you're feeling pretty desperate right now, but I think that in your anxiety, you're not seeing what's there. I have been observing you closely over the last few weeks, and I know how you look when you're under a psychic ‘attack.' Something is getting through, around, or under your
shields.”

“It's not coming from outside!” Deryl howled. “I know these thoughts! These were clients at SK-Mental. Can't you underst
and that?”

“I know—it seems impossible. But from where I'm sitting, I can see that something is getting through your
shields.”

“What? I'm receiving the thoughts of a dozen human lunatics light years away?” Deryl snarled sarc
astically.

“Well, how should I know? Tasmae could Call you from light years away. Where is she, anyway? Why didn't she warn anyone about the ea
rthquake?”

Suddenly, Deryl was very still. The pupils of his eyes shrank to mere pinpoints, and the blood drained from his face. “Oh
, my God.”

“What?”

“Tasmae!” He dashed out of
the room.

“Deryl!” Swearing under his
breath, Joshua tore off after his friend.

Even running, Joshua could barely keep up with him. Deryl would have bowled over anyone in his way, leaving Joshua to trip over their bodies. Joshua followed blindly, though he had a vague sense that they raced upward and into the mounta
in itself.

“Deryl,
wait up!”

He rounded a corner in time to see his friend stagger against a wall, groaning and grabbing his head. Joshua caught up to him, and Deryl clutched at him for support. His irises were a sea of blue. He didn't know pupils could contract s
o tightly.

“Deryl!” He poured all the command into his voice he could.
“Shields!”

“Taz,” he gasped. “Help her. Please.” He managed to point to the single door on the left before his knees gave out and he curled up on the floor. A muffled shriek escaped
his lips.

It was echoed by a louder shriek from within
the room.

Joshua cast a look at his shaking friend.
The best way to help Deryl is to help her
, he decided as he left him and headed to
the room.

His training with his father at the Colorado State Mental Health Institute made him pause with the doorway open only a crack and assess the situation. The bare, dome-shaped room held no objects but a simple mat and a flower pot. The Remembrance? The pot was cast upon its side, dirt spilling, as if dropped. Leinad and a healer he'd seen earlier were in the room, sitting and watching Tasmae, who, like Deryl, lay curled up in agony. Why didn't they do
something?

She was half-lying, half-sitting against the wall, not far from the discarded plant. Her clothes were wrinkled and twisted, her hair wild and standing up oddly as if she had been trying to tear it out by the roots. In fact, she did have one hand gripping her forelocks tightly, as he'd seen Deryl do many times. She writhed slightly, sobbing and babbling in several languages. Joshua heard English, Spanish and something oriental, not Japanese. He caught some of the words: in English, things like danger and someone being after her, spiders; in Spanish, feeling worthless, no one unde
rstanding.

It didn't make sense. Joshua knew Deryl didn't speak Spanish, and didn't think he knew any other language either. Besides, he'd never heard Deryl say anything about arachnophobia. And the Spanish thoughts weren't his own, that was certain. LaTisha's abortion and their subsequent break-up may have left him depressed, but he'd never felt worthless and he always knew his parents would understand, if he'd just get past his shame to tell them
about it.

Okay
, he pulled himself away from those dark thoughts,
so she's not getting this from me or from Deryl, not directly, anyway. What is it? She's acting like she's got multiple personalities—all of them bad. And what's with those two?
Leinad and the healer looked worried, as far as he could tell, yet not inclined to do
anything.

Tasmae switched back to English, but to another mood and a new delusion. Then, she buried her face in her hands, hissing and gasping with effort. Down the hall, he could hear Deryl chanting, “PleaseStopPleaseStopPl
easeStop—”

He was on his own. Joshua glanced once more at his friend, took a deep breath and stepped through the doorway. “Tasmae?” He called gently. “Taz, can you
hear me?”

She looked up at him, slowly, though narrowed eyes. Her voice rasped
. “Human.”

Leinad and the healer gave a start, and Leinad stepped toward him, but at Tasmae's venomous hiss, he returned back to his spot at the far side of the room with a shrug. Joshua didn't need psychic powers to know he was saying that Josh should not have interfered, but now he was o
n his own.

“Human.” Tasmae didn't so much rise as uncoil and stalked her way to him, her shoulders hunched and her eyes hooded. Even without weapons or her lethal hairpiece, Joshua had no doubt she could do him serious damage. He ste
pped back.

She continued to close on him, stealthy, predatory, herding him away from the door. “You did this,” Sh
e snarled.

“What do you think I did, Tasmae?” Joshua asked, keeping his voice as calm as he could despite the fact that he was quivering inside. He found himself desperately wishing for a couple of big orderlies—Sachiko, even—a straitjacket, and some Haldol.
Or maybe an animal tranquilizer. Why don't Leinad and the healer
do
something?

“Tasmae, I'm willing to listen, so why don't you just tell
me what—”

“Shut up! Don't play stupid with me. I know what you planned to do. Human!” She spat the word. Even though she stood only inches away from him, her eyes were so dark that even if he knew the process of her thinking, he could not have seen it. He didn't have enough information, and he knew with all his being that any wrong move would get h
im killed.

He used his only tool, his words. “Tasmae. I'm your friend. I know right now, you've got a lot of confusing
tho—ungh!”

She hit
him. Hard.

As he folded over, she caught him in the throat with her forearm and pinned him against the wall. She was tall enough that she could glare into his eyes with only a slight tilt of her head. “You thought I wouldn't find out? You thought bringing the Ydrel here would make me trust you? That you could sing your pretty songs and make me forget my duty to my people? To the Remembrance?” She gave a maniacal laugh. “I know now. The Barins are a minor threat compared to humans! Humans, with their wild emotions and too many thoughts. Too many riddles. Riddles within riddles, thoughts within thoughts, feelings-within-feelings-within—” She shook her head, and when she looked up her eyes were shiny with tears. “You are c
ontagion!”

She shoved her arm against his throat, and Joshua gagged. He clutched at her forearm, but he didn't know how to break her hold. He couldn't get a breath to answer her, couldn't get a breath. Light and dark flashes dazzled
his eyes.

*

“Taz, stop!” Deryl shouted from the doorway as he staggered into the room. He fought to hold himself together until he could draw her away from his friend. “Tasmae, please! It's not Joshua
's fault.”

“Deryl.” As Tasmae turned to him her demeanor changed. First, it softened; gently, almost distractedly, she released Joshua. He collapsed onto hands and knees, taking in great gul
ps of air.

“Ydrel,” She spoke again, and this time, her voice was low and seductive and she sauntered her way to him. He blinked in
confusion.

“Taz, don't,” Deryl whispered, but she didn't seem to hear him. Did she even see him? His eyes flicked to Joshua, but he was still on one knee, a hand braced against the ground, fighting for breath and consciousness. Leinad and the healer watched, though his muddled mind couldn't tell if they were fascinated or
horrified.

“Ydrel mentor, Ydrel guide,” She breathed as she moved in close, too close. He backed up until he was against a wall, a mere foot away from the plant, which seemed to turn its blossoms toward them like a plant turns toward the sun. He tensed and trembled as she leaned into him, her face barely an inch from his. He could feel her mind flowing against his shields, and he knew if she got through, they were
both lost.

“Please, Tasma
e, don't.”

“Shhh,” She breathed into his ear. “I understand now, I do. You tried to warn us. You showed Gardianju the humans. The dangers. She didn't understand. But I understand. No one will hurt
you now.”

Her hair was in his face and he could feel its softness, breathe in its scent. It made him dizzy; he couldn't think. Dimly, he heard Joshua gasp at Leinad to do
something.

Tasmae was placing feather-light kisses on his ear and neck. Warm shivers moved over his body. The smell of
her hair—

It's just pheromones
, he thought wildly, but it didn't help. Her body was too close. Her mind was too close. His shi
elds sang.

He would give himself to her. Give himself to the insanities. And for a moment, it would be so sweet. He whimpered, but he didn't know if it was fea
r or need.

“It's all right,” She breathed. “We'll pro
tect you.”

“We?” He squeaked.
Run! Hide!
part of him screame
d. “Josh!”

*

Joshua looked up, saw his friend was in trouble and forced himse
lf to act.

“Tasmae!” He stood and faced her, ready to run if necessary. “Stop it, now! The only one hurting Dery
l is you.”

“Shut up!” Tasmae whirled away from Deryl, who sagged against the wall and started to rock, his arms wrapped around
his waist.

“Deryl, snap out of it! I need your help!” Josh
ua called.

“Stay away from him!” Tasmae snarled as she advanced. Joshua retreated, but she didn't pursue. Instead, she stepped back toward Deryl, protecting him like an animal protects
its young.

Work with that
, Joshua's training told him. He held up empty hands. “I want to help Deryl, too. He's m
y friend—”

“Liar! You don't think I know the things you humans have done to him? Would do to us? Gardianju didn't understand. The other Miscrias didn't understand. But I do. Human riddles within riddles—I am the Queen of Riddles. I am the Mistress of Riddles!” She threw her arms over her head and spun. Her foot bumped the plant. She stopped, looked at it and laughed, breathy and excited. She knelt beside it, cradling the blossoms a
nd cooing.

Joshua took the moment of her distraction and moved quickly but quietly to Deryl's side. Still keeping an eye on Tasmae, he gripped his shoulder, willing him silently
to focus.

Slowly, Deryl stopped rocking, though he continued to shudder as if feverish. With effort, he turned his face toward first Joshua, th
en Tasmae.

“It's all here,” Tasmae sing-songed in one language, then another. The blossoms opened further. “The Barins are not the real threat. Humans. They get in your mind, overwhelm your thoughts. Humans. Contagion. Gardianju didn't know, but I know. Mistress of Riddles, I know. The Remembrance tells me all.” And she plunged her face into the full
est bloom.

Deryl screamed,
“Taz, no!”

The plant fell as her hands flew to her head, nails pressing into her skin. She collapsed and lay on her side, curled
in agony.

“Get them out!” She screamed, suddenly sounding like herself. “Make them go away! Deryl, please! Help me. Someone
! Please!”

No one moved. Leinad and the healer continued their silent vigil. Deryl reached out, but he touched the flower and moaned. Even Joshua found himself frozen, his m
ind blank.

Then her sob turned to a hiss then a shriek of rage. “Their fault! The humans did this. We have to drive them out. We have to kill them!” She lunged toward Joshua, her hands out
stretched.

“Miscr
ia! STOP!”

At Deryl's shout, she froze. Joshua watched her struggle against invisible bonds. She turned her eyes and snarl at Deryl, and Joshua followed
her glare.

He swayed, obviously fighting several battles to keep his focus on stilling her. He held the Remembrance in a shaky grip. His spoke haltingly through clenched teeth, but his voice was strong and commanding. “Miscria. You don't…understand. You…don't…know…ev
erything.”

“I am the Queen of
Riddles!”

“I am the Ydrel. Ydrel…
Mentor...”

“Ydrel Guide.” Her face softened into
confusion.

He took a slow, agonizing step toward her, then another. “None of the Miscrias understood.” He gasped, winced against whatever attack he felt, then continued. “They couldn't. I wasn't there to guide them.” He reached out to her with a hand that shook like an asp
en branch.

Freed from his telekinetic bonds, sh
e took it.

Deryl convulsed slightly. “Can't run. Can't hide.” Several times, his body jerked as if trying to rock. Sweat beaded his face. Still, he held Tasm
ae's gaze.

He's not going to last much longer. Please God, help him. Lend him your strength,
Josh
ua prayed.

“The only way out…is through,” Deryl gasped. “Let me…guide…you
through.”

Now she was twitching and trembling as hard as Deryl. Nonetheless, she nodded. She stepped toward him and again lowered her face into one of the
blossoms.

With an inhale that was half sob, Deryl plunged his face down nex
t to hers.

This time, there were no screams. The two crumbled lifelessly to t
he ground.

“Deryl!” Joshua ran to his friend. “Oh, please don't be dead. Oh, God, please don't let him be dead!” Anxiously, he felt for a pulse. It was too light and too slow, but steady. “Oh, God, thank you. T
hank you.”

At last the healer moved, but she only did as cursory a check on Tasmae as Joshua had on Deryl. Then she set the plant upright between them. Both Deryl's and Tasmae's hands remained on the fronds as if attached, their other hands still clasped
together.

The healer stepped back and sat down again besi
de Leinad.